The trial of Mr Brown who owns the Johto regions largest pokémon park has entered full swing today, evidence was presented at the hearing that proves that the bug catching contests may have been rigged. Charges were held against Mr Brown last month over a sudden scyther attack on one of the contestants the child was severely harmed and has in a stable condition in hospital the childs rattata however did not survive the attack while defending his trainer.

"He was always proud of his pokémon" the childs mother said at a press release last thursday "He was in the top percentage and showed alot of promise" a funeral for the pokémon will be held by Mr Fuji next week.

That's stupid. You're stupid. Pokemon is for children.

The Recent BP spillage may have been caused by an influx of Grimer and Muk pokémon observers have reported. The spillage that up until now was theorised to have been started by weakened concrete casing around the oil well may be proven conclusive after traces of acid and slime unique to Grimer and Muk were found in the surrounding area.

"This is the first sign that we need to start thinking about the pollution in the ocean, we cannot have any more pokémon related incidents like this" President Barack Obama said at a recent talk on his visit to the gulf of mexico.

An massive influx of Kadabra and Abra has started to concern members of of the newly fortified town of New Prypiat. It is common knowledge that Prypiat was once an abandonned city due to the huge amounts of radiation leaking from the chernobyl nuclear power plant, the calamity was caused by an electrode refusing to generate the correct amount of power during a test run of one of the nuclear reactors, since then the radiation has dispersed and has let newcomers move back into the town and breathe life into it.

It is beleived that the increase in psychic pokémon in the area is caused by a radioactive backlash that had effected the wild pokémon in the area shortly after the incident occured. It was brought to the authorities attention when numerous families called to enquire why metalic objects such as knives, forks and spoons began bending, "at first we thought it was the souls of the unfortunate pokémon who didn't survive the incident but we later spotted 4 kadabra routing through our trash cans" an elderly resident said.

The authorities plan on calling in pokémon specialists and have already sought advice from reknown pokémon gym leader Sabrina on the issue "we plan on moving the pokémon to a safer environment" a spokesperson for the New Prypiat police said.

bump

do want...

... MOAR!!!

My face when they incorporate planes into pokemon and allow you to obtain EVERY SINGLE BADGE EVER

A registered sex offender has been put behind bars today after an extensive search of the offenders residence found traces of Lopunny fur was his underwear. The victim Lopunny has been taken into care and rehabilitation by the NSPP (National Society of Protection to Pokémon), the Trial will follow next week.

feel free to contribute, create an epic pokemon news thread that sounds beleivable and get it archived.

bumping this shit while i think of something good

do want

>>>/n/

A sex scandal that has been rumored to be true for the last 5 years has finally found closure after a lengthy press release Lance and Cynthia came forth to deny all claims of any sexual activity between them it was later confirmed after the reporter that had first launched the rumor came forth and has been sued by champion Cynthia and Dragon master Lance for $7,000,000.

"We are merely co-workers we have never seen each other in that way and I don't beleive we ever will" Lance said at the press release.

learn to grammar/spell, dumbass

this is so fucking stupid. grow the fuck up you faggots

The Pokémon Civil rights group known as "Alpha" has finally received a hearing in the courts of human rights to put forth their drafted bill to give pokémon equal rights to humans, the radical group well known for their domestic terrorism of labratories in the past has undergone new leadership and a rewrite of their ethics this is the first action that they have put forth under new leadership.

If the bill passes it could cause alot of problems for pokémon trainers, researchers and pokémon centers across the world.

>>62343758

Who gives a shit about spelling, its the internet not a fucking english lesson.

>>62344004
you're trying to write newsworthy-sounding paragraphs, and i gotta tell you, it looks terrible

ITT: homo fucking sexuals

>>62343816
You first.

>>62344134

Go ahead and contribute then bro, i'd love to see how its done properly!

you make me ashamed to be a pokefag

>>62344476

You're just jealous because you lack the imagination.

>>62344595
You - You're kidding right? You're as badas the Naruto fanboys who write erotic fanfics.

>>62344667
inb4 OMG YOU SPELT BADASS WRONG OMG LOL GUYZ PWND

>implying the pokeworld isn't a socialist paradise and there is such a thing as a congress or income tax

>>62344667

OMG YOU SPELT BADASS WRONG OMG LOL GUYZ PWND

>>62344264

The Pokémon Civil rights group known as "Alpha" has finally received a hearing in the courts of human rights to put forth their drafted bill, giving Pokémon equal rights to humans. The radical group, well known for their domestic terrorism of labratories in the past, has undergone new leadership and a rewrite of their ethics. This is the first action that they have put forth under new leadership.

If the bill passes it could cause a lot of problems for Pokémon trainers, researchers and Pokémon Centers across the world.

- no run-on sentences
- full stops used where it makes sense
- pokemon capitalised properly
- actual usage of commas
- final destination

>>62344920
XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
EPIC PHAIL 1337

>>62344704
>>62344667
>>62344476
>>62344241

ITT: people whos idea of fun is frowning at sunsets.

>>62344932
addendum: i do actually like your idea