Minecraft general?

play video games

>calling people neckbeards, then ask for help
>murrica
>not a vidya thread

No. Go away.
>>>/adv/

You're looking for disability payments I think. You need someone to diagnose you, and then there's a bureaucratic process.

Videogames.

>mfw I'm in the UK and getting loadsa money

doubles

>>self-diagnosed Asperger's Syndrome

I seriously hope you go fuck yourself. Asperger's Syndrome can't is a serious condition that has to be diagnosed by a mental health professional. Everybody would like to be an aspie these days, but no it isn't that simple, such a pity...

get a job

/thread

Is this really what you want? To be leeching off the government? Your country? Have you just given up living?

>>107943910
> You need someone to diagnose you

who?
a normal doctor?

>>107944193
>implying there is a problem with this

Behold,

A new mene has finally borned

>>107944291

Living with your mom playing video games forever. Yeah there is a problem with this.

>>107943725

>can't operate around people

Go kill yourself and stop being a drain on society.

At least most of the neckbeards here leech off their parents and not the government.

I wish that this would happen to every /v/aggot on this board. Can guanentee you that there wouldn't be anyone left on this board that post reaction images.

>>107944397
>living doing what he wants to do for his life and getting away with it

Well I'm still not seeing a problem.

Reported

Do you idolize CWC or something?

also, you're the reason why our counties welfare/social programs are all fucked up.

How much go you get from welfare anyway? Do you even get internet and electricity and crap? Just doesn't seem worth it.

get a job
failing that, sign up for clinical studies
failing that, deal dope
if you fail even at that, sell a kidney. dont worry, doesnt have to be yours

>>107944557

You wish that every faggot here would start leeching off the government, and in turn, YOU?

Fuck that, keep them in their parents basement where the only one who suffers are their parents who realize they've failed.

Hey look, i found OP

please /v/ ;_;

i only have my computer for a short time

Man up you fucking pussy faggot.

>>107944778
no I meant that there parents would kick their ass out of the house and tell them to get a fucking job.

Can bet you we wouldn't have any more fighting game or league of lengends general threads on this board anymore.

>>107944944

Talk to a psychologist.
Get help.
Get a job.
Make your parents proud, instead of being a failure.

>>107945451
>Get a job.

it just cant work...
im the most awkward person in the world

Play video games, it will solve ALL of your problems!

Get a job you waste of life.

Well, it's time to go smoke a joint, thanks for paying for the joint /v/.

<3

>>107945650

>i can't work! i'm a socially inept retard! the guvments owes me monies for it!

fucking pathetic faggot.

Stop being a useless piece of shit and get a job, you're not fucking 14 years old. Failing that, kill yourself because you're a waste of space.

Okay, here's what you do.
>Take two wildly successful franchises (say, Sonic and Pokemon)
>Mash their mascots together
>Draw a series of increasingly ludicrous cartoons, one of which should involve tracing your dick onto the page for a sex scene
>Make a series of youtube videos addressing your non-existent fanbase
>start crossdressing and unveiling the analpained Basement Dweller meme guy

The cash will ROLL in.

>>107946058
>Stop being a useless piece of shit
>kill yourself because you're a waste of space.

see this is why....

that makes me want to never leave my house when people are like that

why are you so aggressive

yea, gotta agree with everyone else here, don't take our tax money because you're a retard. fix your fucking problems kid.

>>107946433
And then gaze upon my duality

One day I wanna be successful, to go outside and have a job, right now though... I'm fine with just sitting in my room and smoking weed.

>>107946482
You think that's aggressive? Jesus Christ.

>>107946482
well get ready to leave your house, cause mommy and daddy aren't going to be putting up with drawing jacking off, girls' cartoon watching ass anymore.

There are a lot of ways to make money from home.

Trade stocks, start a blog, black hat marketing, etc.

OP, if you want foodstamps and welfare (for you to get a job and not be pathetic) they pay you like 200 for food, just say you live alone. The job thing is you go and apply to different places and they give you money, also help you find a job.
SSI is if you have a disability, which you DO NOT have.
>mild asburgers
This doesn't even exist
>social anxiety
Bitch so do I, yet I man up and do what I gotta do
I even have physical problems and I don't apply for that shit because im not a bitch nigga.

Apply for foodstamps and work help and get a job, improve your life and get something to do. Also if youre a student, get FAFSA, theyll give you like 1000$ a month for bills and other shit. Gonna build me a new computer once I get that financial aid.

>>107946878
Whoa, there is nothing wrong with drawn girls.

>>107946878
I get the impression that you are mad kiddo. Cry more.

> that feel when he thinks you're all joking
/v/ is ironically a Darwinistic society. If you can't find a way to support yourself, toy deserve to be unsupported and to die.
It's truly how life should be. I don't mind a welfare program to help, but if somebody is trying to ride on this shit alone then they need to die a slow, hungry death.
By the way go to fucking /adv/ you off topic fuck. Your mental disease is definitely showing in that regard.

>>107946675
Sit in your room and smoke weed like I do, but get a job and contribute something to society first.

And no don't go to work high you moron. Save it for the evenings.

Not OP, actual diagnosed Aspie here

Don't think you get Welfare for being socially retarded and shitty at simple things, sorry. Do one of 2 things;

>Live on the street and eventually kill yourself
>Get through your fear and talk to people

As soon as my parents kick me out (inevitable), I will be taking the first option.

>>107947015
Is there any way to bullshit your way into getting one of those blue handicap cards so you can park easily?

I mean, it's so easy to get a medcard, how hard can it be to get one of those?

Unless you've been diagnosed with Aspergers by an actual doctor, you can't. Contrary to popular belief, you can't get SS just because.

Get a doctor's dianosis, then take it to your local SS office and request benefits. You can call ahead of time to make an appoitment so you don't have to wait too long. You'll be called in and a worker at a computer will talk to you, asking you questions like; do you own a house? A car? Are you married? etc. You'll then probably have to wait a couple weeks until you're accepted.

>>107946482

Not the person you responded to, but why aren't you angry?

I mean, fuck. Man up, walk up to your mother, get in her face and let her know that you will have the money come next month.

Spend the remainder of this month not fapping, and running / exercising. With ten final days left, get your nicest clothes out that match decently you autistic fuck, and go out to get a job.

The self confidence boost from not touching your cock will be enough to drive away your anxiety, and once you secure a job the bitch will have nothing to complain about. Don't forget you'll now have income from doing something productive instead of being a useless piece of shit.

>>107947206
I used to work and blaze, at 16 I was working as an IT technician in a school lol. Did that for about a year then things fell apart.

Going to get shit on track soon, but until then, weed and room.

>>107946433
Is this some kind of standard-advice you give?

There seem to be too many people who followed your advice.

>>107947262
Im not sure, I haven't met anyone with one. I think you have to be actually disabled for it though. Medcard isnt an acutal card lol, its just a front, medcards are more like heres the money give me my legal weed. What you have to do is get a medcard, smoke, and try socializing with people like that. Don't fall into this whole "i have a mental disorder, i cant talk to people, im useless" mentality, because itll get you no where. Strive to be amazing so eventually you can become lazy and not give a fuck.

Hopefully this is a troll. Once you're in the system for being retarded you're retarded for good.

>>107947131

>>107947398
Forgot to mention, it's not welfare, op. Welfare is for the poor. You're looking for Disability. You also probably qualify for medicare.

>>107944720
you dont get a lot, not enough to live unless you are really frugal and certainly not enough to ever have children not that money has ever stopped mexicans and niggers from having 8 children

>>107947583
But this is what I look like in real life?

Join the goddamn army.

>inb4 /v/ backlashes about HURRMILITARY.

Try to remember- this primitive simpering crybaby fuck wants YOUR money. He ASPIRES to get welfare. Your tax dollars at work. Why? Because he's shy. And he's self-diagnosed. Send him to the sandbox. There are worse ways to grow a spine and be fucking FORCED to learn to get along, communicate, and have DISCIPRINE

>>107947544
It all started with this guy I met at The Game Place. I think his name was Chris or something? But yeah, it kinda went viral after that, and not viral in the completely-wrong-/v/-created sense of the word.

You are terrible.

Question from someone else: I have been professionally diagnosed with aspergers and on/off antidepressants for the last 9 years. Am I eligible for centrelink payments?

Move to a decent country and leech like me, 250$ a week, enough to pay for food power internet etc. I have social anxiety but that hasn't stopped me working in the past.

>>107948071
>Move to a decent country and leech like me, 250$ a week

finland?

>>107947992
My boyfriends cousin was getting SSI for being depressed/agoraphobic (something like that, she was scared of going outside) and other stuff. I think its all about getting the doctors notes. Also I think the doctor visit to you.

OP you're a fucking faggot.

You're too fucking lazy to get up and do something so you blame it all on your "social anxiety" and your fucking self diagnosed "Asburgers." All you are looking for is a fucking hand out so you can continue to sit on your fat ass and play video games and continue to be everything wrong with citizens of our country. It's nice that your mom is finally threatening to kick your parasitic ass out though her shitty parenting is likely the reason you are such a shit head. Get off your ass, shave, take a fucking shower, and go get a god damn job like the rest of us you whiny bitch.

And delete your fucking hentai

>>107948203

NZ

I'm hoping they'll put me on some free work skills training workshops.

>>107947015

>Using FAFSA loans to build a new computer

This is why you always see fucking retards who baww about being in debt their entire lives because of college.

Holy fuck are you retarded.

>>107948226
Not OP, but social anxiety is real and shit sucks hardcore.

Know what its like to go out and do anything? Where you're scared to get fucking groceries?

Yeah, nah, you're a cunt.

Ima a very small time pot/oxy dealer. I supplement my income with welfare and wic stamps.

I live at home and spend my money on what I want. Just picked up a 3ds today and oot for it. My lifes not perfect but I'm very happy and wouldn't trade places with anybody.

>>107944944
Maybe you should have thought about getting a degree by going to college, and search for a job. Worst case scenario you become a man whore, drug dealer, or a homeless person.

>>107947726
Actually this is a really good suggestion.
A couple kids from my highschool were totally socially retarded had joined the army and they all looked like totally normal people when I found them on facebook. Had lots of friends, lots of photos going out to clubs, with girls and shit.

Gets you in shape, teaches you discipline, not only is it free shelter and food, you get pay for it too.
Not to mention you actually get to do something in your life, you actually experienced something instead of spending all your time on the internet.

There a lot of programs for it too, look them up. Lots of people do it pay for their college.

Oh and if you can't push yourself to complete basic training then, really, you should just kill yourself right now.

>>107948226
song time.

On a shitty anonymous imageboard dwell some infantile manchildren that need to grow up, but I digress.

BELIEVE IT OR NOT /V/'S JERKING TO MALES.
I NEVER THOUGHT AN IMAGEBOARD COULD SO SHIT-IT-TY.
WHACKING TO DRAWINGS IN THEIR COMPUTER CHAIRS.
HOW PATHETIC CAN THEY BE(CAN THEY BE?)?
BELIEVE IT OR NOT /V/ SUCKS ASS.

>>107948537
>Implying 800$ is going to kill me in the long run
Oh no 2 months of a shitty mcdonalds job why is my future ruined so badly why didn't I listen to /v/ nooo

>>107947905
Wait, are you the guy who recorded your friend on a train who was a total asspie like Chris-chan, who had a whole plan for a game with sonic and scifi and shit?

>>107948829

>2011
>Not getting interest free student loans

>>107948695
>Be an Aspy
>Go into Navy basic figuring it'd cure my social anxiety issues
>It did
>Too bad I was too fucking Aspy to do anything right

Like, I didn't just "DO IT WRONG DROP AND GIVE ME 20", I was literally miles behind everyone in everything simple, like making my bed and folding clothes (90% of basic). You can be fit and get a 95 on the ASVAB, too bad those don't matter when you suck at everything.

Hence, me getting ASMO'd then pleading I'd harm myself if I didn't get out, and here I am posting from my parent's basement on /v/.

>>107948829
2 months? I worked part time and generally made ~180-220 a week, when I was around 16. I mean, its not great but its not as bad as you say.

Do you guys honestly think I dont hear this shit everyday?

I have had hundreds of people tell me "YOU ARE JUST LAZY MAN UP FFAAGGOOT"

You think I want to hear that?

I seriously can not function in front of people without feeling like dieing. Im not going to walk down the street and ask for jobs. My body wont allow it. Maybe if I had a job where I could sit on a computer and nobody every talked to me. But I cant find something like that and im not outgoing enough to get it

>>107948573
I get "anxious" all the time, I am not looking for disability benefits because of it. Everyone needs a crutch though don't they? You need your "anxiety disorder."

Hypochondriac OP needs all his self-diagnosed syndromes and disorders too because that just makes everything easier. People expect less of you. And that's nice; Especially when you're actually just a lazy fuck.

>>107948829
>Hurrr what's interest

Why don't you just work 2 months of a shitty McDonalds job if it's not such a big deal, and THEN buy the computer you Autismal fuck.

Let me guess, you're getting a degree in liberal arts or some equally useless bullshit.

Hey retard, I consider myself to be a social retard but then I met a real aspie. You do not even understand the difference between the two'. Its to the point where its mind blowing, it doesn't even make sense. Some of the things he says man, just.... i dont know.

>tl;dr your not an aspie, your just another retard whos creepy as fuck and has minor social anxiety.

>>107948207
Alright, anyone else able to speak to this?

>>107949087

>I'm not lazy! I just want a job where I can sit on the computer all day!

>>107949388
Most jobs you just sit in front of a computer all day.

you are every problem with america, OP.

>tell me what to do
>what counselling should i get
>how do i apply for welfare
>what forms do i need

HOLY SHIT

GETTING A GOD DAMN JOB TAKES A FRACTION OF THE TIME NEEDED TO DO ALL THIS SHIT

JESUS CHRIST I HAVE NEVER SAW ANYONE AS RETARDED

GET OUT THERE AND START ASKING AROUND SHOPS FOR VACANCIES

CHECK THE PAPER

ASK RELATIVES/FRIENDS

IN ANY OTHER CIVILISATION IN HISTORY YOU WOULD HAVE STARVED TO DEATH BY NOW YOU ABSOLUTE USELESS FUCK

>>107949087
See:
>>107947009

There are a lot of jobs you can do from home. You can do programming or graphic design commission jobs too, the only interaction is maybe email at most.

>>107949743

Nah man we'd be the bandits and thieves that get hanged every sunday in the town square.

>>107949803
none of those are viable really because i have no skills

also the fact that my mom is taking away my computer in a day doesnt help

>>107949388
The main key is no social interaction.

I'd work outside all day if I didn't have to interact with other people. I've worked sun up to sun down at my dad's without a complaint.

>Mfw I go to college
>work a job
>moved from Texas to take care of my 83 year old grandfather
>Trade my car to my Mom for her piece of shit Saturn
>live own my own before I moved
>Knowing I'm winning at this game called life

I'm an actually medically diagnosed jobless fucking aspie and I seriously don't get you 'self-diagnosed' guys' obsession with getting fucking pennies a month for being retarded

you don't even need fucking social skills for your average shitville job, take it from someone who's held at least 2 (one good, one bad); some of the cushy-ass noskill jobs require you to talk to people but the truly shitty stuff like fast food? you might not even get an interview as some grouchy ass manager nigger just squints at your hackdoodle job application, throws a fucking uniform at you, and tells you to get in the shitty-ass back kitchen and do some boring ass thing over and over again for 10 hours

since you're new they won't even fucking trust you near a customer, and you won't work the register at all because everyone wants to fucking do that because it's easier than anything else and no one will trust your dumb retard ass to handle money

I should add that I had literally no connections, experience, history, or references when I picked up these jobs

schedule availability actually matters much more for the shitty-ass low end jobs than any amount of fucking skill, this is why the jobless 40 year old retards are easily scooping up all the jobs that should normally be going to 16-20-something kids with no experience and school to finish: the former group has all the fucking time in the world to work weird impossible shifts which is preferred to some kid who can't show up on friday night due to his class schedule

>>107950002
Because of your social anxiety you can't learn any skills?


Everyone ITT is right, you're just lazy and want free handouts. You can learn graphic design, how to trade stocks, programming, black hat marketing with just internet and a computer, and make money off all of that with the same.

Show your mom you're trying to learn and start making money, ask her to give you a month.

If you can't convince her, scrap up $300 and get a cheap netbook, then leech off free wifi and charge it at
starbucks, mcdonalds, libraries, etc. Wash in their bathrooms. If you have a car, live in it.

Panhandle at the beginning, if you don't have ANY friends who'll lend you cash and your parents won't.

Stop being such a lazy shithead, you're not going to get anything free unless you want to go live in a monastery or in the woods. If you want to live in modern civilization then you need to work or have some source of money.

Unless you're a british citizen, then you could be a NEET living off welfare.

>>107950713
i would work at a fast food place but they are 100% niggers and i would get killed

Maybe you're not an aspergian.

Sounds more like schizoid personality disorder.

>>107950871

>>107950864
>unless you want to go live in a monastery

ive actually wanted to do that
but there is no buddhist ones in murrica

>>107950871
any pizza place that isn't the hut is the whitest place in the universe, you'll meet far more bespectacled creepy mouthbreathers than angry black dudes or mexicans (and the latter dudes love fun are actually way more chill to work with, trust me)

big retail works too, they need more lackeys for cart-pushing and shelf-stocking bullshit than they do actual people working lines most of the time

OP needs to have a cute, intelligent 18-year-old girl with a troubled past give him lessons on how to interact with others, until he is gradually able to find a job.

>>107949168
>>107948978
>>107948537
>Loans
>Implying my EFC isn't 0
>Implying I wont get a grant to pay for all my classes and then some
Oh you middle class white people, thinking everyone is as rich as you~

>>107951648
>he thinks you have to be poor to have a 0 EFC

>>107951286
I dunno, has his refrigerator started trying to talk to him yet?

Former fast food employee reporting. Shift manager, in fact.

Get over the fact that it's fast food and it's both the easiest and often the coolest job ever because, hell, it's fast food and nobody really cares. 99% of the work is done by fucking robots, you basically just have to put things in wrappers and boxes then shove it out to front expo. By the time you get that into muscle memory it's basically just free money and, if you close, free food.

Managers, unless they're more aspie than you and think that what they're doing is a True Surviss to Murka (TM), generally don't give a fuck as long as the store is clean and the food isn't outstandingly shitty.

I don't know who thought it was such a shameful thing to get paid pretty well just to make/clean shit. Retail compared to fast food is pure and utter torture.

At fast food, just make sure everything is done fast and isn't on fire and you're good.
Next time you're in a Target, pay attention to what salespeople in store ask. If they do NOT say "May I help you find something? (TM)", they are breaking the corporate policy and it can get them fired. I'm dead serious.

And if you're too fat to get out of the house, figure out something like programming, visual art/music, or something. Of course, if you had any real aspiration you might have found that on your own...

Yeah, if neither work, just kill yourself I guess. Oh well.

>>107951286
That story man ;___;

>>107949388
OMG... that was the most incredible laugh i had this year.... brofist...

>>107943725
Fuck you OP I don't want to work either but I do. Stop making excused I don't want to support you're autistic ass.

>>107951184
There are a lot of fruitpicking farms that will give you food and shelter in exchange for work that backpackers use to support living in other countries. I'm sure they have some in America. Hitchhike to get over to the midwest.

Also, beggars aren't choosers. You don't get to pick what you think seems nice when you have zero skills and can't work with anybody. You should be looking for anything that's better than starving to death.

Why is /v/ such a callous bunch? This guy may have legitimate problems and might wind up in a homeless shelter or something if he doesn't do something. Is working at Walmart and living with your mother for the rest of your life any better than what he's doing? inb4 well that would be helping society herpy derpy doo. Walmart has destroyed many many small business in local communities. To me, working for some shitbag corporation is just as bad if not worse than leeching off the government.

>>107950713
>I'm an actually medically diagnosed jobless fucking aspie

We can tell that by the picture of cartoon characters you posted, you don't need to say it.

>>107946515
>implying /v/ pays taxes

oh man. that's a good one.

>>107952826
I SO knew this will be posted.

>>107952481
This motherfucker doesn't even have the privilege to have a job at Wal-Mart

Still not fucking vidya

>>107952481
>working for some shitbag corporation is just as bad if not worse than leeching off the government.

You obviously don't know shit about economics and the current debt situation in the western world.

The funny thing is that all of you that have the viewpoint that those who are unable in mind/body don't deserve to live are neglecting the fact that successfully conning the government out of its money is just another form of ableness. Those who are smart enough to game the system and get free money are just filling another evolutionary niche.

>>107953309
But this kid apparently can't do that either, so where does he fit then?

>>107953132
it's easy to find a job. You just have to apply to them. I swear that job applications are a /v/aggots kryptanite

You are scum and I hope you end up in the gutter begging some guy to give you $5 for a blowjob.

Don't listen to any of these faggots, OP.

Get your disability, tell your mom to fuck herself, and spend the rest of your life studying philosophy. If I don't see your first book published in 10 years I'll be fucking pissed.

>>107953934
:]

>>107946635
I see none.

Kill yourself.
I have professionally diagnosed Aspergers and social anxiety as well. I also have several health problems that will lead to me being in severe pain for the rest of my life.
You know what?
I have two jobs.
Get off your ass, you lazy piece of shit. You're just a tumor on our society if you use that as a fucking excuse.
9/10 good troll, would rage again.

do you guys remember when people had different personalities, rather than syndromes?

>>107949087
I was in the same boat as you barely 3 months ago.
You don't have any clue what it feels like to EARN a dollar.
You want an easy way out because you're currently being a lazy faggot
The only way to get out of your social anxiety is by going out and doing some physical labor like a fucking man. Trust me, when you earn your money you'll feel confident as fuck and feel good about it

Best part is I can still play video games and not go outside if I want to because I'm contributing to society and don't really like to hang out with people I'm uncomfortable with.

That's my social anxiety and I'm sure everyone has it to an extent. You are just being a big pussy and need to man up if you don't want to be a pussy the rest of your life.