You look like that kind of person

As the ticket guy, I always got a chuckle when people were so clumsy and conspicuous in their attempts to hide food. I mean, lady, I can hear the chips rustling in your coat.

Everyone? What?

Who the fuck are those freaks?

>that guy who brings food into the theater bathroom

>that nerd who wanders around gaping at movie posters

You know who you are.

>mfw i drop my beer down the steps

Fuck...

>paying 5 dollars for a bag of skittles instead of buying it two for one at the dollar store

>that one guy that keeps posting the same boring as shit threads every night nonstop

>that feel when not only are you the guy that brought his own food
>you are also the guy smoking pot
>and never get blamed

>>22306570
...b...but i'm waiting for my friend...

that fat samefag who bumps his own threads

>the black family that sits right in front of you

>that feel when ricebowl in my pant leg and seran wrapped pizza in my jacket sleeve

time2feast

>that friend who has to piss and misses a great scene

>not having a fanny pack filled with spaghett

>mfw the elderly couple in front who keep asking each other what's going on

>that guy who says, "but anon, we'll only miss the trailers!"

>mfw it's socially unacceptable to strike the child running up and down the aisle

>that one who starts talking during the climax of the movie

>the shitheads who can't keep their children under control
>tfw they're breeding, but you're not

>>22306644
Go fuck yourself trailers are one of the best parts of going to the movies

>that fucking dweeb who wants to stay for the after-scene credits

>That one friend who actually goes to sleep in the middle of the movie

>>22306689
derp, after-credits scene*

>that one guy who brought his own candy and caused you to be mad at yourself for willingly being ripped off by the theatre for overpriced food

>mfw some asshole is actually listening to music on his phone next to me
we threw chewed gum into his hoodie

>eating candy

When I can get a steak, or even a real burger at a theatre maybe I'll buy food, but I'm not spending my moms hard earned money on fucking popcorm and sour patch kids.

>>22306689
>>22306702
This is why scenes after credits piss me off. If it's a shit movie, you have to sit through like ten minutes of credits just so the token neckbeard in your group can watch a stupid clip.

>>22306720
>popcorm and sour patch kids
cmon anon you know you want to

>>22306723
And if the movie is good?
And what is wrong with wanting to see all of it?

>>22306723
>That feel when you are that token neckbeard

>mfw there is a local bar near me with lazy boy recliners and shit used for chairs and will serve you food and beer in a small theater for new movies

>>22306720
You can get fresh cooked pretzels depending on what type of cinema you go to

>>22306720
>spending your parent's money
>wants to eat meals during a movie
>hasn't heard of dine-in theaters

Fucking Amerifats.

>>22306570
I like to look at the poster arts before and after the movie, who cares?

>>22306683

True that. The same fucking dialogue is said every time I go to the movies. I suppose its my fault for having a self-absorbed friend.

>>22306689
>>22306606
>>22306570

>the guy who wants to blab about the movie for more than ten minutes after seeing it, and you can't get him to shut the fuck up
>the guy who keeps talking about the movie the next day
>the guy who clearly liked the movie more than everyone else and wants to rub it in their faces

>we're only going to miss the trailers
I feel robbed.

I bring my own soda to the theater

>that nerd who makes them wheel the arcade games into the theatre so he can play them the whole movie

i know ur on here

>go to a movie with a group of friends
>everyone liked it except one motherfucker
>he goes on and on about how shitty the movie was
>he completely ruins the after-movie conversation with his pessimism

Yeah, fuck you pretentious cunt. You aren't joining us next time.

>that guy who has nothing to say after the movie until he goes home and goes to rotten tomatoes

>>22306810
Same. I love trailers.

That feel when you see a trailer so glorious it keeps popping up in your head during the actual movie.

I openly bring my own beverage and snacks in and nobody stops me. Have you ever seen anyone actually get in trouble for this? Nobody has ever said anything to me, despite the 'no outside food or drink' signs.

>>22306860

that trailer for me was terminator salvation

fuck that movie

>>22306788
Sorry if this hits close to home, but you look gormless as fuck walking around gaping at dorky cut-outs of superheroes.

>>22306860
Dark Knight Rises

yeah, yeah, haters gonna hate

>>22306834
You must hang out with my brother Chad. That's him, except even if he loved the movie, he'll only talk about what the filmmakers did wrong and how he would have improved the movie were he in charge because he knows more than anybody in the business.

>>22306834
None can know the pain of being a patrician surrounded by plebs.

>that one guy who talks you into seeing boring ass movies then expects you to sit there and watch the whole thing instead of going to the lobby to play the claw machine and then gets mad when you come back and ask him what's going on

>>22306876
Oh no! I should worry more about how I look to strangers while I do what I enjoy, hurting nobody.

>That retard who pays 10 dollars for a large drink and some M&Ms instead of getting the same shit for 1 third of the price elsewhere

>>22306886
>mfw meeting Chad

>that girl who wants to fuck at the drive-in movies during an awesome scene

>>22306689
Guy who works at a movie theater here.

Fuck that guy.

>>22306920
What is with ushers trying to hurry people out of theaters? They make me uncomfortable.

>that one guy who texts and browses facebook during the film, forces a laugh just to pretend he's watching the film and drills you with questions afterwards because he has no clue on half the film

>that prat who wants to get there super early so you end up having to watch The Twenty

Fuck The Twenty. Seriously.

>>22306920
I paid to watch a movie, I'm going to watch the whole thing. You can sweep up my garbage when I fucking say you can.

>that hipster prick who drags you into a shitty arthouse flick

>>22306945
Fine faggot, but deal with the nasty glares we're going to give you the whole time, thus ruining those last few minutes.

>>22306961
Oh yeah he will totally be paying attention to your greasy faces with that huge-ass screen on the wall.

>>22306932
>>22306945
I am sorry but if i have to clean 4 theaters within the same 5 minute period and one person is just sitting watching the credits I am going to clean around them.

I had a friend who was so cheap he took food out of the garbage cans instead of buying or bringing food. No, I am not joking. He's a fucking animal.

>>22306950
>that asshole friend who refuses to get some taste

>>22306742
>mfw I just watch new films at home

>>22306973
This. People who linger piss me off and I'm not afraid to let them know.

> That Mexican family who brings their toddlers into a slasher horror film flick because they're too poor to get a babysitter.

This really happened to me, saw them taking a kid who was just learning to walk to go see Sleepy Hollow.

> My literal face when

>>22306979
That chair-divider seems like it would make arm-reaching or making out difficult. Cool pic though.

>>22306979

Cool bro

>>22306621
>>22306644
>>22306675
>>22306691
>>22306710
>>22306936

>tfw you are that guy

>>22307007

>making out
>OS-themed theater

7/9

>>22306999
My dad did that to me so he could see Saving Private Ryan when I was little.

I cried the whole fucking time.

>>22306974

>I am a corporate drone who can't think for himself, hurrr garbage can = obviously the food has AIDS, man I better pay out the ass for cheap-ass food

>>22307032

How old were you?

>>22307055
A corporate drone? If you're poor, make the food from scratch. Don't scavenge a pile of rubbish for food like a fucking raccoon. Basic social decency.

>>22307015

I don't have a facebook nor other friends to text instead of enjoying a movie that I paid to see

>>22307065
9.

inb4 tough guy posturing

>>22307079

You can't "make food" in an urban setting if you're homeless

However, walmart and other big chains throw out perfectly good food to avoid expiration date lawsuits and if you know in which containers to look you are now connected to a source of free food forever.

>that guy who has to pass by you whilst you're enjoying the movie and has to either put his crotch in your face or butt in your face.

>mfw I paid $6 dollars for some sushi from a Japanese place in the food court and smuggled it into the theater instead of $10 dollars for overpriced popcorn

>>22307108
If you're homeless, I get that. My friend wasn't homeless. Hell, he wasn't even poor. Had like 300k sitting in the bank from a settlement. He was just miserly as fuck. Never tips. Shoplifts. All that shit.

>>22307141
Eating sushi in a theater sounds cumbersome. I'd be fumbling my gari, wasabi, and soy sauce like a fag.

>>22307143

Sounds like a true gentleman.

>mfw me and a couple of friends sneaked in King Taco Burritos and through out the movie it smelled like burrito in the theater.
Everyone looked at us as we unwrapped the aluminum, bitches wanted some.

>that morbidly obese bloke who has to squeeze through your aisle

visited america once. never again.

>>22307164

It was in a plastic case and I just used a fork.

It made the trailers actually bearable for once.

>>22307167
Yeah, if you don't mind him raiding your change jar for quarters while you're taking a piss or pawning every present you give him or asking for gas money if he drives you more than a mile.

>>22307179
>eating sushi with a fork

The fuck?

>that guy who calls movies "films"

>>22307208

Really? You gotta be kidding me. Now I really want to shake this man's hand.

Why not bring your own food?

The only kind of food theaters sell is popcorn, nachos, candy bars and stuff like that. I don't want any of that. It's overpriced as fuck, too.

>go to local big-franchise cinema (the closest independent cinema is a half-hour drive away) with friend
>go see American Reunion
>$16.50 each
>Medium Coke and Medium Popcorn is $8
>movie is not very good
>mfw it'd be cheaper and more enjoyable to stay at home alone

>>22307220
Indiana Jones and Back to the Future are movies I enjoy.
2001 and Magnolia are FILMS I enjoy.

>>22306691

This ... is me. But to be fair, I only fall asleep during shitty movies.

Don't ask me why I pay to sleep during shitty movies.

>>22307256
The closest cinema is at the local mall about five minutes from my house. I tried bringing in a bag of chicken-salt fries with a friend and they didn't let me bring it in.

Those fries were going to be so good, man.

>>22306999
>Go see Funny People in theaters with parents
>Grandpa fellow brings his 10 year old grand kids to the theater
>Scene where Adam Sandler fucks a groupy comes on
>Acts disgusted and ushers his grandkids out of theater
>It was an R-rated movie
(He was white)

>that one guy on review sites who always says the movie was so bad he fell asleep
>clearly making it up

>>22306691
>Be 15
>Go see some movie(Forgot which one) with cousin and his dad
>His dad falls asleep during the movie
>He starts snoring outta control and loud
Shit was embarrassing and funny at the same time.

>>22307291

Because it's nice to have background noise during a good nap.

>that guy with perfect theater ettiquette
>plans out cheap snacks ahead of time
>picks up the tickets that afternoon for everyone
>Uses bathroom ahead of time so as to not inconvenience other movegoers
>sits down with enough time to see the trailers but not too early to watch all the shitty trivia and Coke ads
>makes the appropriate comments and observations about trailers
>only vocalization or body language are natual physical/emotional responses to the action on-screen
>doesn't text
>puts 3D glasses into designated receptacle

How the fuck do people sleep through movies?

I have a hard enough time sleeping in perfect silence.

>>22307326
Do you know me or something?

>>22307335
most people live their lives shutting out others' feelings/opinions/existence. when you have no regard or personal investment in the world around you it's not hard to just shut everything out completely

>Implying I just bring food and not alcohol.

Not a single fuck given.

>That guy who actually throws away his 80oz cherry coke cup instead of leaving it in the cup holder for the ushers to drink later.

>>22307347
You sound like one bad mother fucker

>>22306534
>that guy who buys $20 bucket of popcorn and $10 cup of coke

>>22307354

Dude, that's fucking gross. Ushers aren't Santa Claus.

>>22306932
The local theater near us sent a cop in while people were waiting to see if X-Men First Class had a scene after the credits.

>Hey guys, they have to clean up soon...

We all gave him a "what the fuck" look.

>>22306534
sauce on dat image. i think i know her

>that theater who puts their popcorn in grocery bags that sound like 7.6 earthquake every time they get a handful.

>>22307347

This Thread is now about the last time you went to the movies drunk or drank at the cinema.

>Me and a friend bought some four-lokos
>Went to the dollar cinema he worked at.
>laughed our asses of at Harry Potter

>>22307379
dude, if you sneak in spare bags and shit, with refills that investment could yield a considerable haul for a struggling family on a budget

>spics gotta eat

At my local theatre, large popcorns get free refills. A friend of mine just keeps his empty, large popcorn bag and gets a free refill every time he goes to the movies.

Economic as fuck.

>>22307397
four-lokos

fuck you tryhard popular 16 year old. that shit is nasty. drink real malt liquor or get something that tastes better than asshole

>those faggots that think they can reserve a whole row of seats when only one of them is actually there

>>22307397
>four-lokos

>>22307347
movies without a 40oz beer are less enjoyable. but getting up 7 times to pee can be a pain

>mfw there's a mcdonalds in the mall where I usually see movies and I always stuff a few cheeseburgers in my pants

Nothing like those shitty cheeseburgers while watching a movie. For some reason they taste pretty good if I eat them really infrequently.

>>22307418

Actually yeah. I WAS 16. Sorry you have no friends or stories bro.

>u mad?

>>22307397
Stayin' classy as shit.

>>22307418
4loko is for cunts who like to vomit

>>22307440
ru kevin smith?
(areyouawizard.jpg)

>>22307452

4loko never made me vomit. I wasn't that beta.

>>22307433
>Not using the empty cans

Shit, nigga...think of the environment. You selfish fuck.

>go to flick with a bunch of people from work
>go in half on a bottle of brandy with the new guy
>drink a little during the previews then realize its dumb and I'm going to have to drive soon
>dude pounds like, 4/5 of the 750mL E&J in 90 minutes
>he's hammered, tells me to take whats left since I payed half and didnt drink any (gee thanks bud)
>go outside
>he grabs it from me, says i had my chance to drink it during the movie. pushes me when i try to take it back
>stumbles back to his car drinking from the bottle and drives home

He got fired a few weeks later. Came in debilitatingly drunk/high/twacked out. could barely walk and his speech was unintelligible

>that bikey gang who comes in and sits next to you, smells like cigars and piss for the entire movie. Transformers 1 was just further ruined for me by this on top of bad shakey cam "action" scenes

>that faggot who wants to talk through the film because he considers it unsocial and boring if you aren't talking while watching a movie

>people who insist on laughing so hard at the very normal funny moment that they miss the punchline-punchline and thus the actual joke.

>people who come up to you and ask you to move from their seat, only for them to realise after you show them your ticket that they went to the wrong cinema #.

>people who walk down 4 or 5 seats on the left and traverse the entire length of seats, passed 15 people, to the seats on the right aisle rather than just walk back around.

>people who ruffle packets of chips the ENTIRE film. How many chips did you bring asshole? you can take your hand out of the chip bag sometimes.

>>22307440
>not having a woman with you to stash stuff in her purse

>>22307446
see
>>22307495

go to bed kiddo

also
>implying fourloko has been around long enough for you to have turned 18 if that story took place at 16

>>22307484
i am an alcoholic who comes from a long line of irish and scottish alcoholics and the only three times I have ever puked was from brass monkey when I was in hs and when I drank 4 loko twice in vegas. fuck 4 loko. that niffer mexican nasty sweet shit is evil. it needs to crawl back across the border with red Cheetos.

>>22307495
Where exactly do you work? I could never see doing anything shady with my co-workers.

>>22307528

Oh shit you right I was 17. Sorry I didn't count right and nice pic buddy.

>>22307547
Local sandwich joint (at the time of the story). fast food basically.

>>22307557
seriously kid fuck off youre embarrassing

>>22307498
>Bikie
Do biker gangs in Australia really call themselves bikies? Are they really that big of ninny nackers?

>>22307566

>tripfag

And I'm embarrassing.

>>22306534
>go to the movies with bro and 2 friends
>spend the equivalent of almost 40 dollars in 2 nachos 1 popcorn and 4 middle size sodas
>guys in the row in front of us star laughing and out of fucking nowhere they have 3 bags of big ass delicius chips, ice tee and some candy

i wanna be that guy, we are gonna do it tomorrow, my local teather just dont give a fuck.

>>22307712
Go in like you just don't give a fuck.

Or just smuggle it.

>that girl who jerks off his boyfriend at the back of the theater

>>22307747
>that girl who jerks off his boyfriend at the back of the theater
>that girl who jerks off his boyfriend
>jerks off his boyfriend
>his

Um...

>>22307747

It's a trap!

>go to see "The Dish" (i think, aussie film)
>am with new girlfriend, whole outting was so we could just get it on
>end up watching half the movie before remembering I was meant to fuck around with her
>she's no longer in the mood, kiss a couple of times then just smuggle for wierd aussie drama

>>22307792
I think she jerks off some guy's boyfriend.

>Always go to Circle K to get candy and shit
>cheap as fuck
>99c for any candy bar
>go to cinema
>See the same shit for 300% more

Haha so glad I sneaked all this great shit in here.

People who buy food at the theater are fucking retarded.

>that guy who ignores generally universal spaghetti policies at theaters and and insists on sneaking it in inside of a ziploc bag, slurping on it for two hours
>that feel when the guy sitting next to you orders crab legs and he flings scalding hot crab juice on you when he breaks them in half

>>22308717
>helping the economy
>retarded

Fuck off.

>>22308832
>supporting unsustainable business practices instead of purchasing at market value
>helping the economy

Let me guess, you supported the bailouts too didn't you.