What a despicable and ugly picture.

>>2073141
did I mention the sucking power of the dung pile sucked off my shoes, socks and pants?

it was really scary.

I had a similiar experience. My grandad had a chicken coop split into 2 sections with a door between them. One section had roosters and the other had hens. Me and my sister went to collect some eggs and my sister decided to open the door to the rooster coop at which point about 20 horny roosters swarmed into the hen coop and jumped all over us and broke all the eggs we had and all the hens went crazy. I ran away crying.

jesus fucking christ ive been around farms and seen shit like that i am so glad im not you

Nearly drowned in a river because of the same sucking effect of the mud at the bottom.
Not especially traumatic.

Uninvolved father I hardly knew kidnapped me from my mother and the shock/trauma of being ripped from my stable environment somehow triggered a hereditary chemical imbalance. My brain produces almost no serotonin at all. I haven't felt angry, horny, happy or guilty since I was 12 years old. I have no ability to empathize with others. I'm not depressed, as I have no ups or downs. Just an eternal, comfortable gray.

>>2073195

Wow. How's that working out?

>>2073180

you are comparing fermented shit to water and mud ? ... I think you just lost.

>>2073195
God damn that must blow. But you obviously must not give a shit.

>>2073212

I'm not a virgin if that's what you're asking. The only downside that I can objectively realize is that I will never accomplish anything important in my life. I have no internal motivation to do anything but maintain the status quo. I live a mundanely normal life. I generally fake my way through social interactions, and I've become very good at it. If we met in person you'd have no idea that I was actually empty on the inside. Like I said: eternal, comfortable gray.

>>2073239
Wow, way to completely avoid the point of the post there.

>>2073256

I want to be you! I tried so hard to control my emotions, and it's still slipping out on occasions.

>>2073249

I'm not exactly apathetic. I mean, I am, but not in a way that prevents me from living a socially acceptable day to day life.

>>2073195

I don't care, bro

When I was in 6th grade my parents got into a huge fight about a car issue. Sadly my dad was pretty drunk and started beating my mom, breaking dishes, and just throwing shit. I remember that he was pulling my moms hair and my mom was crying really hard. I got down to my knees and begged my dad to stop. The neighbors came over and took my mom to their house to get her away. But she didn't want them to call the police or whatever. My dad told me to go to my room and everything would be ok. Instead middle of the night, I came down to the living room to clean up all the broken dishes, vases, and just a huge mess. There was some blood on the floor. I had never felt so weak in my life. Anyways the worst part was later that week, when my mom went to church. And told a small group of her friends about it and she was crying as she was telling them. I was ashamed and just angry. I mean when I was younger, my mom beated me but I never really cared. But I just can't picture her hurting or in pain. Sometimes I feel like killing my dad, thank god they're seperated now. I mean I told him that if he drove me far enough, I'll stab him in the fucking throat.
Now I can't hold down relationships, I'm flakey as fuck. I don't believe in anything constant with another person. To be honest most of my childhood was pretty traumatic. My dad would be drinking and become dead drunk. Once he tried to slit his wrist, had to get a whole bunch of stitches. Some shit children don't need to see but I'm glad. Because today I am a strong person, slightly emotionally retarded.

>>2073256

hi there, dexter

>>2073301

It's "beat me" not "beated me". Stupid idiot.

>>2073256
You turn that frown up side down.

>>2073256
Huh eternally gray would drive me insane, I'm more of in a black and white mind frame. There's no common ground for me, it's either one thing or the other. It can't be both.

>>2073313

Oh sorry didn't know I wasn't allowed to make typo mistakes on the internet. Jackass.

I was the only one in this movie thearter besides this creep he was starring at me the whole time then at the end of the movie he came and sat next to me he smelled like ass

>>2073328
are you a girl? are you cute? pic?

My uncle (whom I had only seen a couple of times before, since he lived 1,500km away from me) thought it was a good idea to carry me to a 'carneo' (i.e., a -baby- cow slaughtering in a rural environment). Since I didn't care that much about animals, and actually was sort of a sadistic little prick, the whole salughtering thing went pretty well. However, in order to get to the slaughter house we had to cross this river. And Goddamn uncle, thanks for the vertigo.

Now I live in a flat and can't even get near my very own windows.

Oh, and the meat tasted like shit.

>>2073268

Grass is always greener, I suppose. There are a lot of things about it that most people would see as benefits. I've never been hurt in regards to relationships. I'm very good at detecting bullshit, lies, and insincerity. I've never experienced the typical drama that people complain about on here all the time. If it's any consolation, I'm always curious as to what I would be like to feel again, and what I would have become if I never lost it. All I have as a basis for comparison are memories of the emotions of being a child, and I hardly think they measure up. I don't think I'll ever feel real lust or love or excitement or deep satisfaction or feelings of accomplishment. I'll never feel any positive emotions at all. But, really, I'm perfectly content with that.

>>2073346

Most uncles would sex you. So consider yourself lucky.

>>2073308

Meh. I don't kill people, and I don't plan on it. I was never subjected to watching my mother being hacked to death with a chainsaw. I'm a very non-violent person.

Got home from school to find my parents were divorcing. Yelling, packing of bags, telling me it wasn't my fault.
An hour later, after some quiet, they both come into my room and tell me they're gonna stay together after all.

Stopped caring about what they did at that point.

>>2073376
don't you just love genetic imprint of mammals? an offspring is always more important than shitty fights.

I tongue kissed my dad from I was 6 to I was 11.

My dad also used to make out with my uncle, his brother-in-law.

...
yeah.

>>2073406

It's not so consoling when you're 11 and your idea of your family life is laying around in bits on the floor

>>2073347
What effects do drugs have on you?

>>2073427

I've never done anything but marijuana, but it never had any noticeable effects after the first three times I tried it so I stopped. I've thought about experimenting with different drugs, but I've concluded that if I were every to suddenly start feeling again I'd fall into a major depression over the whole "what I could have been" thing and kill myself, so I generally stay away.

>>2073462

Talk about staring over a precipice. Jeez.
Stick to cups of tea, I guess

>>2073462
why would you say it's a hereditary "Defect" ? it's a bloody evolution. Have alot of babies guy, and pass this wonderous genes onward. One day few hundred years later, humans will no longer be shackled by emotion and useless "pro gay rights" craps and we will be liberated and devote our existance into understand the universe.

>>2073462
just do some /psy/ stuff. and i can't imagine how a person like you would fall into a depression

>>2073485
>Psilocybin is rapidly dephosphorylated in the body to psilocin which then acts as a partial agonist at the 5-HT2A serotonin receptor in the brain where it mimics the effects of serotonin (5-HT). Psilocin is an 5-HT1A and 5-HT2A/2C agonist.[4]

take shrooms. DO IT FAGGOT

My parents always used to fight when I was around. Loudly, swearing, I don't remember any hitting though. I can remember a time when they were in my room fighting, and I was just sitting under the covers. They eventually separated, and I bawwwwed for weeks.

I ended up with my mother, and my dad almost committed suicide something like 3 times. He used to be an alcoholic, but now he's just a chain smoker. He was never an aggressive guy though, the only time he hit me was a smack backwards, out of the way of an incoming truck.

I blame my mom I guess. She's highly critical, something I've inherited.

I speak in a dry monotone, if I speak at all.

Also, my dad played "steam roller" with me once, and would cry on me before the separation.

>>2073474

I have no real interest in understanding the universe, or why I am the way I am, or if there is an afterlife, etc. I'm purposely avoiding having kids because I *don't* want them to inherit something like this. I dodged a bullet with my condition as it is. My mother was unipolar depressive, and my grandmother was a bipolar schizophrenic. I live such an ironic existence in being a complete waste of unlimited potential; I just can't see the point in producing more people that might end up like me. It's all fairly irrelevant anyways. Faking platonic social interaction is one thing, but faking sexual interest and intimacy in a long term relationship isn't something I think I'm capable of.

Also, this thread needs more childhood trauma stories.

Right now, I'm devoting myself to understanding just what the fuck it is you're trying to say.

Only gay people have gay children, don't they?

Oh yeah, if you think evolution works miracles in a few hundred years, then that "Caution: Contents Hot" message on the top of MacDonalds coffee cups was meant especially for you.

Until I was 11, My parents never lived together, me and my mum just lived in my grandparents house. I only saw my dad once a week, I thought he was the most awesome person ever.

When my parents moved in together they slowly started fighting with each other, I would just lock myself in my room and play video games or watch movies.

They where never like this before they moved in together, It was just "Traumatic" to see the other side of people I thought I knew.

And on another note, around this time I found out that 80% of my friends where just using me for the things I had.

Not as traumatic as all the other things here, But even to this day I can't help but think that maybe it's my fault.

>>2073520
Actually, I really remember the drunk times. I don't think I'll ever forget one time where we were sitting on my couch. I was watching a show, and my dad sat down next to me, drunk off his ass. We watched together for a bit, but I felt a growing tightness in him. I eventually looked over, and he had teared up a bit. Not knowing what to do, I continued watching the show. Except, he was full out bawling now. He reached over to me, and asked for a hug.

I hesitantly agreed, and he completely wrapped himself around my 7 or 8 year old body. He started crying really hard, and his breath was horrible. Eventually his cheek stubble was grinding against my face, making an awkward situation a little painful. He cried for a good half an hour or so, with me simply sitting there. He might have kissed me.

...

>>2073554
I was a somewhat fat kid, and I didn't shower much, based on the logic that "I was going to do it later, so why bother now?". I had pretty long hair, and it sort of aggravated some people I knew. I got mostly D's and C's, and most of my work was late getting in. I spent all of my time roleplaying on neopets.

Then one year, I just shaped up a little and started getting A's, still without doing any work. I was pretty smart I guess. I just became shy and unattractive then, but I think I was permanently scarred.

>>2073522

Robot can't love.

I've never experienced anything traumatic in my life. I had awesome, supportive parents that loved me and an older sister that taught me life lessons, but I ended up as an asocial, paranoid homofag.

>>2073538

you should take the advice yourself. You obviously have no idea how it works either.

>>2073512

I wouldn't know where to get them if I wanted to. I used to know a girl who was pretty deep into the drug scene. Lots of LSD and different things. She said she was going to find some molly and LSD for me to try, but then she just sort of faded out of the picture.

>>2073195
>>2073195
>>2073195
>>2073195
>>2073195
>>2073195

God damn is there a name for this? I don't feel guilt, sadness, anger, happiness. Nothing interests me like it used to, I really loved video games and now I only play them to make my friends happy.

I cheated on my girlfriend yesterday and I don't feel guilty, and I didn't feel any sexual attraction to the girl I was with (apart from a tightness in my pants)

We should hang out and watch paint dry together.

>>2073625

Yes nigger, of course you're right. Now what's the matter? Can't talk with cock in your mouth?

>>2073195
>>2073647
I have this too. I never really feel anything. I don't speak to anyone because nothing they say interests me, I don't care about my friends or my family. I don't get angry, or sad, or happy, or anything. I have no drive, so all I do all day is sit around browsing the internet listlessly.

It's destroying my life and I find that mildly irritating.

All of you are pathetic. You call this trauma? God, Western culture is FUCKED if you're he next generation.

Pic related, they are the next generation.

My parents used to argue sometimes. My father is a very reserved, civilised man - he doesn't smoke and rarely drinks - so there was never any hitting or throwing plates. However the arguments used to get quite vehement, starting out over something stupid like, I don't know, an object in the house (e.g. a tool) was missing and it was my mother's/father's fault who always 'moved things'. It was OK, they'd usually just forget it. Then one night shit got real, as the saying goes.

I was in bed with them (I was a typical scared of the dark pussy for ages) and I remember my dad yelling something and trying to get the phone off my mum. Anyway I shot the fuck up as they started shouting various things at each other, my dad requesting who was on the phone (my mum's man she'd been cheating on my dad with) till my dad says "I'm going". He got his briefcase and clothes, asks if I wanted to go with him, I said no and he stormed out and drove off.

I just sat on the bed hugging my mum for ages trying not to cry.

Fuck, rethinking that makes me upset.

My mother and father were murdered in front of me.
My only solace, in my life after it, was in playing in the forest near my house, being alone. One time I was playing near a creek, and a grizzly bear raised up on its hind legs behind me, towering over me at four times my height. It roared, and then went back into the forest.

I saw it as an omen. I became... BEAR MAN

>>2073750

Holy fuck! Bear man!
I hear you fight crime with your bear hands

>>2073755

my bear feet, too

>>2073746
If your mother can cheat on a husband she has a child with she is one vile bitch. I feel sorry for you :[

>>2073758

Yes. I'm not saying she's a bad mother, in a lot of ways she's a very good one, but her personality and the way she lived was (and is) too focused with men. When my dad and her split up, she had about five different boyfriends/partners before settling with my now stepfather.

Thank you for your sympathy nonetheless.

A few years ago I realized that I had a terribly lonely early childhood. At the time everything was happening, I didn't realize that shit sucked because I thought everyone lived that way - classic infantile egoism. I was an only child of a single mother (My father died when I was 11 months old - when I was 14 or so I found out my father had shot himself) and I remember walking around my neighborhood going to the houses of "friends" to see if they wanted to play and always getting rejected. Not understanding that they just didn't like me and didn't want to play, I would keep coming by. From this point of my life all I can really remember is walking around my neighborhood trying to play with someone.

Though, now that I say that, I do remember one other specific incident. One winter (probably 1988 or 1989 because I was 4 or 5 at the time), we had a red-headed woodpecker nesting in an old birdhouse high in a huge White Oak tree in the backyard. My mother and I had been watching it back there, and it had been like a little friend - it made the place feel more cozy. There was a bad blizzard that winter, and the birdhouse fell out of the tree. My mother and I watched the bird flying around in the snow and wind trying to find its house. I'm certain the bird died in that storm.

Now that I am telling these stories together I see why I remembered them more than any others. Instructive.

>I could drowned in shit!.

wat

>>2073791
This made me cry. I hope for your sake and mine that you are a troll cause i had a miserable childhood, shit friends parents fighting etc.

>>2073195

I was overly-emotional as a child. I was questioning my morality, right to exist, and purpose for existence when I was 6.

About once a month I'd end up shaking on the floor for a couple of hours, overcome with emotion, 97% of the time negative feelings. Not necessarily sadness, but anger, fear, etc.

As a result, I am in full control of my emotions. If I decide I'm happy, given two minutes, I'll feel euphoric if I like. I have found that any intense emotion is usually a bad Idea, so I keep myself somewhere just above the grey line. Last night I found out that my best friend got sent to arrested and is likely gonna end up with a 10 year term.

I cracked a smile and moved on.

>>2073817
It's totally true. My mom is great though, I have a better relationship with her than the vast majority of my friends have with either of their parents and it's always been that way. Her support is probably the reason that I didn't realize until later that shit sucked.

>>2073820
>got sent to arrested

I accidentally a whole phrase!

>>2073843
My mom too. I'm 24 now and still don't have any real friends, just convenience relationships with coworkers and classmates. My mother and sister are the only persons in the world i can really call my friends.

>>2073195
O hai Patrick.

bloque de moot

>>2073791
>From this point of my life all I can really remember is walking around my neighborhood trying to play with someone.

I cried.

000

>>2073791
I was a little like that. For the first few years of school I used to play on my own and talk to the walls in the playground instead of talking to people (I was about 5 remember). Looking back it seems weird but I didn't have any friends for quite a while.

ghfhhfhhymp

My kindergarten principal Mrs. Gard at St. Bernadette's Elementary locked me in an empty meeting room for most of a day once. I had insisted that the Tasmanian Devil was a real animal (obviously, I was right) and she screamed at me to stop lying and behave. She put me in the room before lunch and let me out when my mom came to pick me up. She did the same sort of heinous shit to lots of other children at the school, and the priests eventually got the Bishop to fire her.

One time shit was so bad there that I ran away from school during a big assembly. I got outside and down the block before I realized that I couldn't get home because I couldn't cross the street alone. So, I just went back and sat down in my spot on the bleachers - nobody ever noticed I was gone.

>>2073629
grow them, it's really easy. easier and more discreet then growing weed.

>>2073791

You should write a book 'bout your childhood drama. Also, no simpathy for you since I share (>>2073195)'s condition.

up until 6th grade i'd get made fun of by the whole class. i'd go to teachers for help but all they'd do is laugh and tell me to ignore it, and when i did something to defend myself i'd get in double trouble. it would seem to me that they were sending me a message that i should just take it and let the more attractive kids be.

i used to dream about shooting the school up. but i got over it when i started working out and losing weight and improving my physique. but it still has messed with my psyche, i can't go out in public without thinking that everyone is gonna laugh at me. i don't show my anxiety on the surface, i just bottle it up. then i get somewhere kinda private and the shaking starts.....

>>2074285
I'm using some of it in a fictional context, but I don't honestly think that the shit that happened to me is any more fucked than what happens to most people when they're children. I mean, it isn't like I got molested or witnessed any murders.

>>2073750
You can't be a bear.

m00tblock.

>>2074339

Pff, your stuff while being quite lighthearted, is something that most of us can relate to. Do it.

I never had a mother.

They say the "critical bond with the primary care giver" is formed in the first 36 hours. I was premature, so I spent that and longer in an incubator. And so it was, 8 years later, my mother split from my father. Can't lose what you don't have.
"Not very traumatic", I hear you say. Well, you really have no idea.

>>2073758
Tip: >>2073746's "Dad" probably isn't.

>>2074414

But bears can't effectively fight crime. So I am a bear MAN.
Do you see?

Sometimes I think it would have been better if I didn't have a mother or father growing up, because I think the pain I'll have the day they die will be far worse than the pain of never having them around.

>>2074535

You're on the right track. But why stop there? Kill yourself now, too. Don't lament on the years you could've already spent dead, think for today; because today is the first day of the rest of your death.
I think a lot of people could learn something from this anon.

>>2074516

I kind of feel sorry for you. The critical period for attachment isn't 36 hours. Its no where near that...

It starts at 6 months and usually stretches to 9 months. However there have been cases where kids have been rescued out of this in foster parent cases all the way up to 9 years old. They were never fully adjusted but still led normal lives.

Whoever told you that 36 hours thing was trying to protect your mother who obviously had some deep-seated problems that blocked a healthy development.

Up until 6 months a baby doesn't even know what Mother and Father are... They are just food sources that dissapear whenever they leave the field of vision.

>>2074599
I think by "critical attachment" we mean the very very deep rooted one.

>>2073195
>>2073647
>>2073685

Axis II: Antisocial Personality Disorder

>>2074624
Thats the one I was talking about bro. Before 6 months, the child has no object permanence, and as such cannot develop attachments further than, you give me food, I will cry when I'm hungry because when I cry you come and give me food. It's only later on when the baby develops object permanence and realises there is a world beyond its vision that it starts developing emotional attachments, like love.

Sorry dude.

>>2073791

You sound a lot like me...except for the fact that I have siblings (who were very adamant about excluding me from any activity they were involved in) and my dad never killed himself.

Most of this caused me to become a complete social wreck, I never had a single friend all throughout school because I was afraid to socialize with anyone. As a kid I dreamed of being a movie-producer, my time during recess was spent pacing the schoolyard coming up with ideas for movies, playing, replaying, and readjusting different scenes in my head until they were perfect. I think I "created" about 9 or 10 different movies just during recesses in elementary school (I also used to walk around our backyard at home and do this).

One thing I remember in particular that upset me a lot as a kid was getting an F on my report card in fifth grade under "Social Skills". I always tried very hard to not let my family know about how lonely I was at school to the point where I lied about having friends and made up stories about stuff that happened with my friends during school, then I'd tell these stories to my mom when she picked me up from school. Then at the end of the report card there was a little paragraph the teacher writes about how the kids were doing. He talked about being concerned that I never talked to anybody and that most of my recesses were spent alone. After years of lying, my mom pretty much found out about my social retardation from an abritray grade on a report card. I kind of stopped speaking to her (aside from basic communication) after that for a few years because I felt so embarrassed.

>>2074905

To add to this:

Most of my traumatic childhood experiences came from my stepdad and older siblings. My stepdad was very abusive both physically (one time he pulled my pants down in front of all my brothers and sisters and beat me with a belt because I ran and hid in my bedroom closet when he came home. My arm was also covered in bruises from where he yanked me out then dragge me into the living room. This kind of stuff happened very frequently) and emotionally (when I was six he told me I was lazy, worthless, and would starve my family because I wouldn't be able to afford food to feed them because I would never be able to hold down a decent job, he yelled this at me in the front yard because I accidently dropped a sleeping bag in the grass while unloading the car from a camping trip we had just got home from).

One instance in particular really affected me as a kid (I was around 8 or 9 at the time I think). I wanted to take up the saxophone in band, but it required you to stay after school for 45 minutes for practice a couple times per week, but this meant my mom couldn't pick me up and my stepdad would have to. When my mom asked him if he minded, he started yelling about how musical instruments were for faggots and that he'd only pick me up after school if it was because of football practice. I spent the rest of the day sobbing in my room.

I never did get to play the saxophone...

>>2073647
possibly clinical depression... maybe sociopathy, depending on how many cat's you've chopped up

Perfect childhood here. Except occasionally seeing my father beat my half-sister, lol.

>>2073724
People who spend all their time on 4chan, believe it or not, survivors of their pathetic trauma (if you can call it that). People who are worse off would not be here.

Ha, now I'm thinking of people so traumatized they cant even handle he internet.

I've got a few.

Well, my uncle molested me. That was pretty traumatizing. He never talks to me during family events, he completely avoids me and sometimes just leaves completely. Nobody knows about it.

My dad was an abusive alcoholic with a splash of drug addict. One night when he was fucked up on something he was playing chicken with his knife, resting his hand on the table with his fingers spread and hitting the in-between spots to the table as fast as he could. My mom asked him to stop and when he looked up at her to yell at her, he stabbed right through his hand. We had to call the fire department to remove the knife because it was so deep in. Blood was gushing everywhere, scary shit.

Yeah and just all the times I woke up to hear my dad screaming at my mom that she was useless and seeing him beat her and having him tell me he never loved me and never will was pretty traumatizing too.

He killed himself recently.

I'm really uncomfortable around older males now, like friend's dads, professors, etc; no eye contact, barely any talking. Yeah.

sure are alot of emos on 4chan...
is majority of the internet childhood depreaved?

Last year a friend of mine killed himself by jumping off a building. I had never met him in person and only talked to him on IRC. We talked everyday when I got home from school and I thought that we were best friends or something. I don't know how he felt about it. Most of the time we talked about shit like this thread. But when he killed himself I didn't find out right away, he just didn't come on IRC for a while. Eventually I heard that he killed himself in another channel. I didn't leave my room for about a month after that, except to piss and shit. I normally don't get emotional when people die, like grandparents, uncles etc. I just stand there, quiet, like usual and never cry. But the night that I found out my friend killed himself I cried like I never had before. I still miss him a lot and it makes me really sad. I still idle in that IRC channel, we were the only two people who used it but now I am the only person there. I often think about killing myself but I won't do it because it might fuck up other people even though I really wish I was dead. I am waiting for a violent revolution or riots or some cause that I can go fight and die for.

>>2076312
oh my god that's sad.
damn.
i feel ya.

I was fighting with my mom, and she was getting in my face, so I got scared and tried to stop her with my foot. She said "ARE YOU TRYING TO KICK ME?" and bumrushed me. So I took a taxi to my dad's home.

Back in junior high I was well-liked for doing anything for a laugh, but it also meant that I didn't get any respect. A couple days I was sick from school and when I got back and went to meet my group they scattered. It turned out that while I was gone they had decided things were better without me, as an excuse to use me for a new amusement by ostracizing me and seeing my reaction.

After a few weeks I was reassimilated, but it was never the same. I was even lower than before, and one girl who hated me would occasionally remind everyone that they were supposed to too. The instance I remember most is when I was sitting at lunch and realized that everyone was slowly migrating away from me. When I moved to rejoin them they went back to where they'd been.

I ended up threatening to stab her and got in trouble.

My childhood was normal. Just boring.

There was a time back when I was a little kid that I didn't have any friends at all and people used to go out of their way to fuck me over. I was very socially inept so I just didn't know how to make friends at all. Think about how it would be to live life with everyone literally out to get you. Or at least ignoring your very existence. That kind of fucked me up. I used to read a lot and became rather isolated. Since then I've improved my social mannerisms and people have started to like me but I only use them. I think as a rule that people are just little simple creatures that will always react the same way to the same stimuli, do something bad, they'll react negatively, do something which they like and they'll react positively. just like machines, like very complex machines, but still machines. Biological robots of sorts. And so I don't really feel remorse when I take advantage of them. At least, the part of me that isn't really human. There's still a small part of my old self left that still believes that people are good and that his task is to make the world a better place. I usually allow him to help people since it keeps him from fighting me, but me? My goal is to simply learn and use other people to acquire a comfortable existence for myself.
tl;dr fuck people, they didn't like me, now I use them, also, I repeat, fuck them.

>>2077090
Wow man can you not see that your traumatic childhood was the reason for your fucked up headspace?

You'd be alot happier if you got over your limiting beliefs and realised that creating win/win situations always beats taking advantage of people in the end.

>>2076471

Same shit happened to me. I had a group of people I was kind of friends with (around 6 of them) and I was always kind of on the edge of being kicked out of the group. In fact, almost every time I came back after being sick, they didn't want to hang out with me and ran away from me.

Looking back, I know why they did this. I was actually more mentally mature than they were. My jokes would have been more appreciated by slightly older people (we were 10 - 11 at the time). I had a fair amount of 4Chan in me before 4Chan was even made.

Also, I never went over to their houses or brought them over to mine because most of them had shitty annoying parents and my parent's convinced me that it was perfectly normal to never bring anyone over to your house.

Fuck em. My best "friend" at the time went to my high school and we were both in the advanced classes. When he got asked a question in maths once that he couldn't answer, he started crying right there in the middle of class. Made me feel good.

The memory of my childhood is a bit fuzzy, maybe I, as a kid, decided to block those memories, don't know. Up until seven or so years old I was kind of sociable. I remember running around of neighbourhood with a group of kids. Unfortunately my father was an alcoholic. I honestly don't remember how it was like. All I can recollect are some fragments, days when he was sober enough so I could ride on his back. He was tall. And some days, when I came back from school to see the front door open, him lying unconcious in the hallway and having to call my aunt asking if I could stay at her place until evening, when mother came back from work. He became abusive enough so my mother and me moved out and for at least few months lived at her parents' house. I remember we came back to our house one day, to see what has transpired since. Every single thing made of glass was broken, the pieces lying on the floor. We stayed at my grandparents' place until my parents' divorce, details of which I don't remeber at all. After the divorce we moved back, the house belonged to my mother now. I think that all those events may have affected me more than I thought it had, made me the introvert loser I am today. Also, last time I saw my father (from distance) was at my grandfather's funeral, but he seemed to avoid me. I haven't spoken with him since the divorce thing. And then he died. I felt only a little bit sad, which I don't think is an appropriate emotion when ones parent dies.

>>2077363
4chan is not mature... 4chan is the menifestation of immature

PROTIP: All parents fight and beat each other.

Name one couple who has not done it.

>>2077529

Not the guy you're talking to but I don't think you "get" 4 Chan. A lot of the people on here are trolls and meta-humor enthusiasts who exaggerate their emotions and ironically portray real world stereotypes.

If you understand that 9/10 people are joking in their posts on 4 Chan, you'll find it a far funnier place.

Well my childhood was not that traumatic but my aunt and uncle are foster parents and have looked after many kids that are removed from abusive homes.

The worst i can remember was this kid of 11 who had a seizure the day he was given to my aunt and uncle. It turned out it was caused by withdrawels from the drugs that his family had been shooting him up with to keep him quiet.

He was from a tongan family with a father who used to molest his children and he told my aunt about the times his dad would get on drugs and start arguing with his wife. This would often end with his dad beating the shit out of his mum and then forcing his way into the kids room to violently rape him. One time he and his mum were tied up for a few days and repeatedly raped in front of each other.

The kid had heaps of scars, both from the abuse and from self-mutilation. It was hard for me to talk to the kid without feeling sad, because he used to go on and on about how scared he was that his dad would find him one day. Sometimes we would find him hiding in weird places and crying.

But the saddest thing about the story is that a few years later he was taken off my aunt and uncle and sent back to his parents. I lost trust in the government that day.

>>2077660

Only real intellectual on this damn board. I salute you, good sir.

>>2074644
The current diagnosis for ASPD requires antisocial manifestation of antisocial behavior, antisocial meaning detrimental to society (stealing, physical, emotional or mental abuse, murder, etc.).

>>2077660
>>2077810
The two posters indicated above are actually the same faggot.

At the age of eleven or so, my father became a much different person. He started to drink more, buy a shitload of guns, and became a white supremacist. I don't know what turned him this way; it could have been his own violent childhood or a bad fight he got into with his father a few years before then. It could have also been September 11; he was scared shitless and started to stockpile military supplies. It could have also been a head injury he received while building a warehouse when I was nine.

Whatever the case, he started being very belligerent to my mother. Nothing physical until it all culminated one night when he pushed my mother down a flight of stairs. Soon afterwards they got a divorce, which really sent him over the edge. When we went to visit him every other weekend, he'd tell my sister and I that our mother was once a drug addict and wanted to abort me. When we told him we didn't want to listen he'd get fucking pissed.

The first big incident was when he took my sister hostage in his apartment. I was finishing summer camp and stayed with my friend for a few hours after it ended until my mother came and got me. He told my grandmother (mother's mother), uncle (mother's brother), and even the police over the phone that he was going to kill my sister. After over twelve hours, though, he let her go to the police. My mother and I were told by my sister later on that she was forced to sleep on a pile of guns.

>>2078123

I forgot how exactly he got off, but no charges were pressed and he retained the same partial custody of us. He was okay for a while; he seemed much more friendly to my mother and even took us on a vacation to Las Vegas. However, his mental health slowly started to deteriorate as he started drinking to excess and taking loads of diet pills. During Thanksgiving, my father told my mother that he couldn't take care of my sister and I, so my mother, having to work, sent us to my father's parents. After a fun few days, my father called my mother demanding my sister and I. My grandfather had to drive us back, and when we got to the pick up location, my father was fucking furious when we told him we wanted to stay with his parents. He picked a fight with my grandfather and tried to stab him, but we quickly got into our father's truck to appease him.

A few months after that is when the shit hit the fan. My father came to school drunk during one of my basketball games because he had to pick my sister and I up for the weekend. He dragged my sister out of the gym by her arm and when my mother tried to stop him, he hit her in front of everyone. When I got out, my crying mother took me to the car to get my things. That's when he got into his truck and drove to us. Yelling and screaming at me, I told him I didn't want to go. That's when he pulled a gun out of his pocket and I turned around and screamed. That's when a group of men, including my coach and best friend's dad, restrained him so my mother, sister and I could escape. He was arrested and the only contact I've received were two letters recently. I never responded.

>>2078130

To add insult to injury, a friend's mom; a rich, meddling cunt who I curse to this day; convinced all of my other friends' parents that it was unsafe for my friends to associate with me because my father could come back or I could snap. For the remainder of junior high, I had absolutely no friends to speak of.

I think I turned out okay though. I have a good amount of friends and a stepfather who is more of a father figure to me than my biological father ever was. Emotionally I've become rather apathetic and cynical, but hell, who isn't these days?

>>2078130
Oh wow.

That's harsh, Anon.

>>2077660
Offtopic, but this reminds me of a joke I heard a long time back:
SomethingAwful is a bunch of stupid college students trying to act smart and failing; 4chan is a bunch of smart college students trying to act stupid and succeeding.

At age 5 I realized exactly what death meant; simply, an absence of life. I could 'remember' a blackness before I was born, and I realized a connection between the time before birth, and after death. Nothingness. I used to cry at night because of this.

The thought continues to scare me.

I have a cousin, male, about 4 years older than me.

We grew up together cause both of our family is in business togather.They moved to another city for a few years. My cousin came to visit me when I turn 10. He wantted to play a game, aske me to close my eyes and open my mouth. I can't be sure, but I'm pretty convinced that he put his penis in my mouth. I didn't think alot about it at that time. 2 years later,he and his family came to visit our family again. This time, he grew bolder, I came back from school and was lying on my bed reading. He came into my room sat next to me and start message and caress me. It was NOT a cousinly touch. He was all over my chest area. Maybe I was afraid or did't grasp the seriousness of the situation, I didn't stop him. He moved to my thighs and crouch area. He was at it for a good while until my father came upstairs and called us to supper. He asked me to go to the guest house after shower and before bed time. I didn't go.

After that time, I kept my distance from him after that day.

I never enjoyed the full pleasure of masturbation or sex. Cause everytime I'm getting touched, I flashed back to that day and it's an immediate turn off.

I had a similar experiance. I was fucking around with a bonfire, but it was all closed up, so the fire was within, and a heap of carboard surrounded it completely. I began climbing the carboard tipi and fell though, almost burned to death.

lol.

anybody have any "mom dressed me up like a girl trauma" ?

>>2078606
any sexy scars?

>>2078629
Hell no.

What the fuck is wrong with you damn it?

>>2078637
Burn scars aren't sexy. If he had gotten in a knife fight or something he might have sexy scars.

>>2074599
You sir are an idiot, it's called imprinting and is instinctual, so therefore has nothing to do with object permanence.

>>2073256
you sound like fucking Dexter Morgan

>>2077661
Your story is the only one here that actually made me feel sad.

I guess in comparison to a lot of people my life is nothing..
But it left me quite fucked up.

Been depressed since age 4, I just remember crying for no reason. I moved 200 miles when I was 10, leaving the only friend I had behind.
Since then I had no friends..My first day of school I managed to get gum banned because it stuck to my skirt, everyone stared at me when it was announced, I cried, everyone hated me.

I used to be quite confident, I volunteered to be in a play, it was to play the part of a boy (I'm a cumdumpster in case you hadn't gathered by the skirt thing)
The girls 2 years above started taunting me and laughing at me til I dropped out of that play.
Same thing happened two years later, I never acted again and withdrew into myself.

In secondary school the enormous bullying started, kids 4/5 years older than me threw stones and paper and...anything at me. I was only 11.
I made friends with kids 2 years above after a while, they were the "metal" kids, and being slightly smarter than people my age i fit in great, they loved me. yet now people in the rest of the school still picked on me. it involved the whole school following me round throwing rocks and shouting at me.. people older and younger.. I took 2 months off.

This was all because I had a slight accent, my hair was curly, and i was so much shorter than everyone else. then i dressed goth and obviously it lead to problems.

at 16 i got agoraphobia when my parents divorced, my grandmother got diagnosed with cancer, my boyfriend left me, and i failed my exams. despite working through it i'm not the same.

i can't hold down friends for long, i practiced speaking to cover my accent which people now tell me is cute, and i would say i'm reasonably attractive, but people generally fucked my life up, because i was different. now i am so scared of being myself i am just ashamed.

jesus christ you guys are fucked up


i remember this one time my parents got into this huge argument when I was 3, and im talking about xbox hueg. My dad ended up pulling out a kitchen knife against my mom and threatened her with it

When I was about 6 years old I went to a public pool with my mom and my friend and his mom. We were swimming when my buddy decided to drag me over to the deep end with him even though neither of us could swim properly. So we both promptly started to drown and no one in the pool would help us. The douchebag lifeguard didn't even notice. My friend's mom and my mom did though. My mom instantly ran and jumped into the pool and fished us out while my buddy's mom just sat there holding her hands to her mouth like a little bitch. Because of that I was terrified of learning how to swim until the age of 10.

>>2079010
I would like talking to you, very much. Im an opera fan.

When I was 5 I jumped into the pool with the swim tube thingie around my knee. I ended up head down in the water unable to flip myself upright.

almost drowned, very scary.

This one thanksgiving night my mom made lots of awesome food. And SHE MADE ME EAT THE BROCCOLI!!! OMG, I'VE BEEN SCARRED FOR LIFE SINCE THEN!

Feel bad for me guys

>>2079010
Don't be scared. Once high school passes, people start to actually grow up. I used to be in a similar situation: I was really introverted, and desperately wanted to be popular, so I tried to hang out with the popular crowd, which resulted in my getting laughed/cussed out of the group sometimes. I ended up with no friends whatsoever until later high school. Also, I had a strange fondness for electronica since middle school, and people made fun of me ALL the time for not listening to whatever everyone else listened to.

Through high school, even though people were starting to get lives, I was still hiding in a shell. Eventually, I looked around, realized that I didn't need to give a shit about what other people said, and I just started doing whatever I wanted, and always defended myself instead of shying away. Bullies stopped trying to annoy me, because they didn't get their rise out of seeing me put down. Also, people saw who I was, and I actually ended up with a ton of friends by the end of high school.

Don't be afraid. There's no reason to, now that you're past the stage where nobody has any kind of independence whatsoever. Do what you want to do, and just be yourself. If someone says something about you that you don't agree with, realize that they have NO FUCKING PLACE to say ANYTHING about what you should and shouldn't be. YOU are the only one who can decide who YOU are. Fuck them, they don't mean anything.

My tamogachi died. :(

I used to play hide-and-seek with my brother and sister. I always hid in this clothes hamper because I could fit. My brother ALWAYS knew I was there. he would just sit on it but not let me know. So, when I went to get out to look around I couldn't I would scream for him to get off, but he didn't until I would start crying like a baby. It made me claustrophobic to some extent.

>>2079575
Sup white knight, funny seeing you here.

>>2079660
/r9k/ - 9000 white knights/virgins

Srsly tho, she needs to get some metaphorical balls, because there's no point in hiding once everyone has their own identity figured out. So yeah, I'm going to go all white knight on her.

my stepmom, wife of my dad who i hadn't seen since I was 2, at the age of 5 threatened to throw me out on the street because I peed on the seat.

"And dont think im not serious"

So... I had to sleep next to my dad, adn I couldn't sleep... I still remember that mornig exactly, I was cowering everywhere, afraid she'd just show up, even though she went to work.

God... I'll never forget that day. I went home, called there, and said I'd never go there again. I then saw him at 16, went to his place a few times, then he accused me of stealing shit and at 17 I stopped going normally, I Called him to come to my graduation, no go.


I have issues beyond what I can even think of because of that threat that day.

I can't even begin to analyze them, I can do others, but not my own at all. It's ridiculous.

>>2074994

B'AWWWW, The saxophone is my favorite. :(

>>2074516
Newer research shows that that is total bullshit.

Babies don't bond until after their first 4 months.

I was 15. It was Thanksgiving dinner.

My uncle on my mother's side came to dinner. He always had issues, but things had seemed better in the recent years. So, things are going swimmingly, most of the family has gotten to the big table to eat dinner. Then my uncle stood up, muttered something, held a gun up to his head and out came his brains.

We ended selling the house and moved. I never really knew the uncle that well. It was shocking, yeah, but I dunno. I think nowadays I'm so desensitized thanks to 4chan that it doesn't really bug me. Just freaky I guess. I feel bad for the people that might live in our old house.

>>2079742
Did your mom make you eat broccoli too?

That shit scars you for life, man. Fuck the uncle. The broccolis dude.

I didn't have any childhood trauma, abuse, anything... which makes it even worse that I ended up being completely insane entirely by biological chance. All of the fucked-up, all of the guilt, yet I can't even claim that I would normally be a good person. Ahh, how I love nature's ways...

>>2079760

If you can't step back and laugh at something.

Don't live.

Lol @ this, nice.

>>2078130
Fucker should rot in jail for life. He's no father to you, he just happened to fuck your mom and get her pregnant. He's not your father.

Shit, I hope you don't let him affect you too much, if at all.

>>2079685
Me, Im not a white knight, I just have a thing for broken chicks...its practically a fetish.

>>2079760
I love you anon.
God, did I laugh.

>>2073462
I beleieve I've come from a similiar "apathy"
I'm mostly still there, but psychadelics make me feel completely inhuman. Like a soul inside a vessal.

>>2078629
Sexiest trauma EVER.

Once when I was nine me and a second cousin (female, I think she was eight at the time, I'm not sure) were playing in the woods outside of my grandmothers house and we were approached by an older boy (fifteen) who lived in the neighborhood. We were pretending to be hero's from some show had watched, we were on this big quest when he decided to butt in, he started messing around with the story, which infuriated me, switched it around as to where I was the bad guy and he was married to my cousin and they were going to defeat me. I was not happy. But after I was killed he decided that him and his wife should kiss like they do in the movies, she was a little uneasy about it, but sure enough he started sticking his tongue in her mouth, I was mad, but whatever, "he's bigger than me", but he continued and eventually he put his hands down her skirt and convinced her to stick her hands in his pants. He molested her. She began crying and I was raging so I walked up to the house, ran into the kitchen, stuck a steak knife in my belt loop and ran back to my to the boy who now had her shirt off and was straddling her with her panties around her ankles and his boxers pulled down. So I took the knife and rammed in into his lower right back...

>>2080039
Damn right.

brb, looking for shota gender dysphoria erotica

>>2080069
I usually fucking hate emoticons, but you've earned yourself one.

(bO_O)b

My dad used to be a huge heroin addict.
I didn't even know until I was about 13 though.
He would drive me to my hockey games, fall asleep at the wheel and shit, I thought he was just sleepy.
When I was about 13 I found out he had that problem, and by that time I had already known my brother had a problem. My dad and my mom got divorced when I was 7. (I have 2 older brothers and an older sister btw)

When I was 15 I found my brother's old journal. It was long, but I read the whole thing in one day. It just detailed my brother's journey through drugs, which lead him to heroin. At one point, my dad began selling drugs to my brother's friends, but he didn't know that he was actually selling them to my brother too. Eventually my dad found out and yelled at him, but eventually they began shooting up together, as if it were father and son, going to bar. Eventually, my dad, unable to live with his problem, tried to kill himself by taking 19 xanax or something like that and walked down to the river to die. My uncle miraculously found him and carried him up to their mom's house. My brother had a long talk with our incoherent father about why he had to live. I don't know if he even remembers it, but I think he started getting clean after that.
My brother still had a pretty big problem which involved joining the army, and then getting kicked out on purpose by doing crack and failing a drug test.

>>2080100
When he came home from the army I was lying in bed with my brother watching some anime or some shit, and he had a long talk with me about how much he loved me and I was so important to him and I bawled my fucking eyes out on his shoulder.

When I read all of that it felt like I'd been in the middle of a bunch of chaos my entire life and hadn't known it.
I can remember the day my dad tried to kill himself too, It was Christmas, I had gotten some cool new vidya and was playing it with my brother (same one with the drug problem) and I never caught on for a second that anything had happened. I just sort of wish I was in the loop, but I know it was better for me not to have been.

My mom had a boyfriend, when I was like in 4th grade, after my dad and her got divorced. He was highschool friends with my dad and one day I was lying on the couch with him and he was talking about how much of a great guy my dad was, he started crying and so did I.
I always yelled at that guy because he was kind of a jerk sometimes, but when he and my mom broke up, I was glad. Then a couple years later he died for no reason. I don't even know what the cause was, but he just laid down one day and died. I was so sad because I remembered that moment and realized he was a good guy and I never got to talk to him again. I'm crying now goddamnit.

Everyone is all clean and dandy now, parent's are still divorced, but they don't fight and both of my parents are very loving and my relationship with all my siblings and them is great.

When my family members start dying off I'm going to be fucking crushed. I am crying so hard from writing all of this.

>>2080069
>ran back to my to the boy

i accidentally a whole phrase etc

>>2080069
Even if the last part was a lie to make the poster feel better, this is still an awesome story. I'm thinking about what kind of fucked up 15 year old kid would do such a disgusting thing.

/b/ I'm looking at you....

>>2080069

and......

what happened then? did he rape you too? have any sexy rape scars?

>>2080069

... So he's screaming, and I'm screaming and she's screaming, and he's rolling around and bleeding everywhere so I take the half naked (and now smeared with blood, crying her eyes out) girl by the hand and we run back to my grandmother. It didn't take long for her to put my story together and she calls 911. He nearly bleeds to death (is also sent to a youth rehabilitation center for god knows how long) she's traumatized and doesn't speak for nearly a year and and oddly enough, excluding a few years of therapy and heavy sheltering, I'm perfectly fine. When I was fifteen her parents went out of state for a few weeks and she stayed with me at my grandma's. I hadn't seen her in a while and after the awkward teenage catching up I realized that she was quite a bit more messed up than I thought. Sexual trauma, she developed a bit earlier. Just out of frustration and a lack of anything better to do we started experimenting with each other, it was all we could. There were about two days when the house was empty that we simply stayed locked in the guest room having sex.

Fem anon her:

I just started a new school and was going to the 6th grade. On the first day of school we all had to write a paragraph about yourself and read it out loud. There was this really dumb hill billy looking kid who was already held back 2 years and he stood up and said:

"My name is Don, I like girls. I like Mellisa(thats me) and all I think about is having sex with her all" and the teacher cut him off and put him in the hall.

I was afraid for the rest of the school year of him stalking me until he actually got expelled for ripping the clothes of a girl in his gym class. I was so happy it wasn't me

>>2080112
Sorry old chap, sincerely. Do realise that there is no God keeping score, and that refusing to succumb to despair is the best possible way to commemorate and celebrate your loved ones.

I wish you every success in life, and sincerely hope that you discover the supreme richness of youthful potential long before you have squandered it.

Nil desperandum.

>>2080203
And he's yellin' and screamin' and bleeding all over
And I'm like "Hey, come on, don'tcha get it?"
But he just kept rolling around on the sidewalk, bleeding, and screaming
(screaming sounds)
You know, just completely missing the irony of the whole situation
Man, some people just can't take a joke, you know?

>>2079788
Thanks for the response man.

I've tried not to let it get to me. This happened when I was in 7th grade and I'm now a freshman in college. I have the rare bad dream from time to time and those letters that he sent me had some very vague threats (you'll see the truth before the year is over), but I'm not afraid of him anymore. He thinks my family lives at an older address (letters were forwarded to my current address) and has said he has went there, but even if knew where I lived I'd be ready for him.

I do think he'll get my address eventually, to be honest. My grandparents still hold a soft spot for their son and have been leaking information to him ever since he lost parental rights, like the kind of job I had, the kinds of grades I make, and our old address. But like I said, I'll be ready for him.

>>2080281
Sup Weird Al.

>>2080248
Thank you...

>>2080281

I can't find the irony?
Explain?

my dad did pest control. i was dragged along, and forced to help. by 'help' i mean kill things. mostly mice and rats. a few cats and dogs too raccoons 'possums, you name it. i was 5 years old. he gave me a pellet gun and said 'shoot 'em. make it quick goddamn it!' i also got a hunting knife. i'd get hit if i didn't kill it clean. i was sickened at first. then killing animals didn't bother me. i used to get sick at blood. now i can see spilled brains, guts, no problem. i experimented on my prey. i learned how to shoot a mouse dead quickly, how too cut a dog's throat so it'd bleed out.

i don't feel anything when killing animals. i don't really feel anything. i don't like hurting them so i make it quick. i have horrid dreams everynight that i don't remember. i have violent flashes in the day. i don't eat much (never meat).

the bastard died 5 years ago (dad0. cancer.

>>2080311
Albequerque by Weird Al Yankovic. Damn I used to think that was the funniest shit ever back in elementary school.

>>2080358
i'm shaking just typing this. i'd try and forget it but i can't. maybe telling this will make it better.

>>2080383

XD I'm lame, I'm sorry.

>>2080100 here.

Thank you for this sincerely, robots. I mean, the past is the past and all that shit, but I think it's good to get all that off your chest everyonce in awhile and cry a bit.

dfgoigewogiewrfw (random characters because for some fucking reason I was muted when i tried to post this, as if someone has posted it before. wtf, fuck this shitty mute algorithm)

I've never told anyone this. When I was in kindergarten the family across the street would watch me after school, before my parents got home from work. Their daughter was in my class. So we would go to her room and she would take my pants off and play with my junk. I didn't like it obviously because I was like fucking 5 years old, but I was already too shy to speak so naturally I did nothing. I don't think this completely messed me up because I was already selectively mute, but it certainly didn't help.

You're all going to be okay, sleep soundly robots.

>>2073791

why the fuck didn't the bird fly south in the winter. fucking darwin has claimed another worthy being.

>>2080358

As sort of an animal rights activist, I don't think you should feel so badly. If the animals were going to die anyway, you were doing them a service by killing them in as quick and merciful a way as possible. There are everyday people that have normal jobs and normal social lives that have done much more grotesquely cruel things to animals for no reason whatsoever. If you ask me, you're a cut above most people.

>>2080311
I've never heard the song but I can definitely see some actual irony. He becomes the one bleeding, screaming and probably crying rather than the girl. If the story is true then it serves him right. Further, he is revealed to be the actual villain and the guy who posted is the true hero.

>>2080234

kind of hot. half boner gotten

>>2080234
OMG, how did you EVER survive that?? You are so lucky, you must be so scarred now!

Fucking women.

Fuck am I glad I can't remember my childhood. This thread brought up all kinds of unpleasant feelings I don't want to think about.

i was molested as a child.

>>2080393
It wont, sorry. :(

>>2080565

I've honestly never thought of it that way... I think, I'm probably going to end up over thinking this.

>>2073522

Do you know of a name for your disorder?

>>2080628
OMG speedycat, that's why you're a pedo! It's not you fault, it was whoever did this to you! You're only reliving your childhood trauma by doing it to someone else, you cant help it!

Poor thing

I got my dick sucked.

>>2080663

i know, it still hurts man. i have been seeing shrinks since i was like 7.

>>2080663

Well you grasped some facts, shame you can't grasp the meaning of those facts.

i was sexually abused on two separate occasions. once in kindergarten by an older neighborhood kid who was my closest friend at the time, and then 2 years later by the son of the babysitter that my mom left me with when she went of to Las Vegas to get married to her 2nd husband.

One time when I was 15 years old I approached these two kids who were playing about some shitty ass show they were watching on TV, I think the boy was like 9 and the girl was about 8 years old. So I butted in and started messing with their story. I made it so the ugly ass boy was the villain and the hot loli was my wife. And that we were going to defeat the fucker.. he didn't seem too happy about that. But it was cool, I didnt give a shit what the little shit thought. Anyways, so I told the girl that after defeating the bad guy, we should kiss like in the movies.. the girl was kind of hesitant but I kissed her anyways. I think she was kind of scared of me because I was bigger, so that made it way easier. Then I put my hands down her skirt, and told the bitch to touch my junk. She did but she was crying like a fucking baby. A few minutes after fingering her sweet little cunt and making the bitch touch my cock, the boy comes runs right behind me and stabs me in the fucking back with a knife. So hes screaming, shes screaming, I'm screaming in fucking pain, and they both run off to her grandmother's house. Few minutes later the cops come and take me to the hospital. I was about to die because of that little fuck. After that, I spent 6 years in a youth rehab center.. after I got out, I was planning to go back to his grandmothers house and kill him, but what do I see? The little two fuckers (who are now teenagers) fucking the brains out of each other!! Goddamn... So I said fuck it, and fapped to watching them do it from the room window.
I havent done anything from that time... I'm still trying to kill them, stalking them and whatnot.. but I havent found the perfect time. One day, though... one day.

My father was a drinker and a fiend...and one night, he goes off crazier than usual. Mom gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn't like that. Not one bit.
So, me watching, he takes the knife from her, laughing while he does it. He turns to me, and he says, "why so serious?" He comes at me with the knife, "why so serious?" Sticks the blade in my mouth... "let's put a smile on that face!" and... "why so serious?"

>>2080758
God, man, I feel you. ;_; You must be like on xanax and shit, right? You probably have no feelings anymore. ;_;

>>2080770
Its all bullshit. OMG you got molested??? MOVE THE FUCK ON

>>2080957
Well thats what you get for being so serious, motherfucker.

You'll be alright, though.

My childhood was pretty mild. I didn't have any friends up til Junior High. Thought about killing myself in the 5th grade. Got therapy after all night session of raging hysteria, turned out alright. All's well that ends well.

One of my friends was significantly more fucked up though... never knew his father, mother died when he was 14. Grandmother was incompetent with finances. House foreclosure, etc.

>>2077591

Disagreements and verbal arguments are an inevitable part of nearly all romantic relationships, but domestic violence is not.

>>2080957
It was obligatory, but I still laughed.

Damn, why is it so interesting to read other people's suffering?
I mean, the worse it is, the better.

I don't get it.

>>2081377
schedenfreud my friend...schedenfreud

>>2081023
Speedycat is a professional troll from /k/.

nothing he writes should be taken seriously.

i had just gotten home from a sleepover at my friend's house and i was feeling great, when my mom told me she kicked my dad out of the house and was going to divorce him

my life has been pretty much downhill from there

>>2081403
Guy that doesnt know what sarcasm is.

Molested, abused, neglected, picked on, sheltered, hated.

>>2079880
That's supposed to happen.

I was hit by a fully-loaded speeding honey-pot truck. it was carrying about 10 tons of shit doing 65 in a 45 when it hit me.

My dog choked on his tennis ball while I ran up to the store. My fingers were too fat to get the ball out. My parents blamed me for his death. I loved him.

>>2081551

Oh yeah? One time I got my head stuck in a honey pot. Oh god how embarrassing, all my friends were there too.

Almost nothing traumatic has happened to me, at least not compared to most here.

The powerhungry teachers with no real skill who punished me for being intelligent have lead me to do whatever possible to avoid the spotlight.

Combine that with my school guidance counselor telling my mom that I was going to grow up to be a serial killer and requiring that I attend therapy or I'd be expelled (IN 4TH GRADE), and parents who used to overract to everything that happened to me at school (usually resulting in ridiculous lectures, never anything else), and now not only am I extremely introverted, but I have an inherent distrust of all authority figures and have serious trust issues.

>>2073820
your such a fag. seriously. iblah blah blah i used to pretened i knew what i was talking about and shit scared me so i baaaaaaaawed.

but i'm ok, i am perfect i can controll my feelings, i r super human.

god, seriously did you just make that up?

is it the kewl thing to be the master of your emotions? enjoy your empty life, fag.

>>2081854
I should clarify, when I say lectures, it was really more of an interrigation session.

Absolutely no violence and little to no verbal abuse (that I can remember) but still. Not the ype of shit you put on a child.

Then again, I remember almost nothing before I was like 11, so who knows what I'm forgetting.

I whispered "we're not fuckin' McDonald's. Give us more time" to my dad 'cause I was pissed off about something.
We were at work. He was at the register and I was in front of a wall that separated the front desk and the booths in the restaurant. He grabbed me by the neck and threw me up against the wall. He took me out to the parking lot behind the abandoned building next door. He grabbed me by the throat, pinned me up against the wall and yelled "Do you know who the fuck I am?! I'm your father! You talk to me like that again and I'll rip your fucking teeth out!" There's more to it than that but not worth mentioning.

I love my dad to death.

>>2078629
Dad dressed me up, and tried to raise me as a boy. Thought I was a boy 'till I was 8.

>>2082297

That's not sexy, that's just, bizzare.

>>2080628
Oh yeah? Well I was molested by a child.

>>2082335
Well, now I'm fond dressing up like a guy, and passing myself off as one.Also, became a fag.

Didn't have any friends until high school to speak of. I was the smart kid up until 4th grade, until they told me I couldn't move up to 5th grade until I repeated 4th grade (father convinced the school that I was ready for 1st grade when I was kindergarten, people told me that he was right).

Got used for what I had until around 7th grade, which was my schoolwork. Grades and motivation on the steady decline until high school.

Beaten by my mom when I was little. It's kinda funny, actually. My father was the most peaceful and loving guy I had ever met, but my mother had, and still has, this burning hatred for him. She implanted this image of a crazy, out-of-control man into my siblings' heads. I remember clearly, when I was 6 or so, her pushing him down the stairs during a fight.

I don't get it.

I horse ran into me when i was 7

>>2073320
I'm more black and white with my emotions but sometimes ill be both, not that they cancel each other out but ill be sad as shit but manic as well, it is really fucking weird lol. Easy shit to ignore though, excercise helps.

>>2082761
is this dangerous?

mootblock

>>2073099

i felt the same way the day i found 4chan

i

When I was a little boy, my mother ended up remarrying to my current stepdad. At age...five, or so, he pretty much secretly began to punish me behind my mom's back. Any little kid cried a lot at that age, but my stepdad thought otherwise.

So for several years, if I had ever cried at all over the course of the day, my stepfather would wake me up at midnight and throw me into the swimming pool. Not only did that instill a fear of my stepfather in me which lasts to this day, but it pretty much made my young mind think that sadness = punishment. So in response I stopped becoming sad altogether, for the most part, and instead I'd just get very angry. Relatives would see me at funerals and wonder why I was so stern and pissed off and my mother has no idea why.

>>2082880
You should kick his ass.

mootblock

I'll skip all the getting-bullied -stories, since while being a world of shit, they're not what this thread's looking for. Also, this is going to be a bit lame, but anyway:

--

When I was 6 or so, our family (mom, dad, me, twin brother) went camping in the islands near the coast. We put up our tent in a small islet beside a larger one. It was deserted, save for lots of seagulls. The gulls goddamn owned the place. One night we threw spaghetti for them, and they came in hordes to have an epic battle over the scraps. A huge gull (I'm talking wingspan about my goddamn length at the time) bit a smaller one in the nect and left a bloody mark on it. This kind of stuff was the coolest thing ever to a little kid.

The islet had a cliff shore. For some reason it was so full of sharp objects me and my brother had trouble walking on it barefoot. Upon inspection it became apparent that the sharp things were bird bones. The islet was full of them, as if every seagull came into that distinct place to die.

When exploring, we found a lump lying on the islet. When looking it up a bit closer, we saw that it was a seagull too. But it was dead. Perhaps this was connected to the droves of gull bones. When looking at the seagull, we saw that something was moving inside it, right beside a hole in it's chest where it's heart should have been. They were small, green, and waving around aimlessly in the bird's guts. I was utterly fascinated and kept staring and staring into the thing until my mom and dad yelled to me to get the heck away from it.

Later on, I understand the things inside the seagull could not have been green because they are supposed to be maggots, and maggots are white.

--

But for some reason, even though it seemed so fascinating that day over twenty years ago, today, I'm utterly terrified of maggots. There's nothing in the world I fear and loathe as much as them. They're my only irrational fear.

Yeah, I told it was lame, I don't get it either.

>>2073256

Why hello Mr.Bateman

>>2082966

I'm ok with maggots, cause my uncle used to take me on fishing trips, and he kept a rotten fish in the back of the pickup truck for the sole purpose of growing maggots and use them as bait.

>>2078629
Only child of a single mother, here. She must've been lacking in things to do, because once I was potty trained she would only buy my girl's panties as underwear. I didn't really know the wiser for a long, long time, actually.

By the time I figured out that I was actually wearing girl's underwear (I was nine, changing for swim practice with everyone else), I really couldn't switch to boxers or briefs. They felt extremely... wrong!

Today, nineteen years old, I still wear panties exclusively. Mom thinks it's hilarious. I'm not a trap, by any means, I still wear all boy clothes. Just, the wrong underwear. Nowadays I'm gay, my boyfriend loves how I look in Hello Kitty panties, and my life is generally awesome.

Thanks, mom! :3

see >>2083035

RELEVENT TO THIS THREAD

Molested by my uncle, age 10. I got panic attacks for years, developed an eating disorder and I haven't been touched by a man since.

I'm still such a ronery fembot.

>>2073820
Hey, god knows if you're still in this thread but I used to get those 'shakes' too. Ended up practically gyrating on the floor in fits of anger or despair. I have near complete control of my emotions now too, so what do ya know.

>>2083168
I fail to see how that is traumatic.

>>2083168

This is gotta be a troll. It's got to be.

If not, it's epic. Your mom made you gay and you loved it.

>>2083228
he's gay now..

Boring uneventful childhood filled with video games.

No clue how I'm the head case I am today.

My grandma died of cancer on Christmas Day when I was 5, a week after the doctors had said she'd be okay. Then my grandpa disowned my mother, myself, and my brother until he died a few years later. He didn't even acknowledge we existed until he was dying, and by then he couldn't even speak anymore.

>>2083257
Why? Or don't you know?

>>2083263
No fucking clue. Could be the same reason my girlfriend dumped me. (Somebody else's cock "tasted better")

>>2082966 here

There was an earlier thread in the veins of this one, with MSpaint your awful childhood memories. There was a girl in that thread that explained - in a very interesting way - her times with her utterly insane mother, to which I replied with a lenghty post describing my similar situation with an insane, but a bit more scary and abusive mother. It was interesting because she had somehow gotten over the situation while I hated and still hate my mom and there was some discussion on the viewpoints therein.

Sadly I didn't save the thread.

I'm kind of asking if anyone else did...

I cut off half of my middle finger in a door when I was 5. I think it kind of traumatized me because for as long as I can remember I've hated people holding my fingers, even girlfriends, and the thought of breaking my fingers (especially someone snapping them gahhhhhhhhhjgfhj) makes me nauseated. And I have a really strong stomach otherwise.

>>2083257

My grandma died on Christmas Eve when I was 19. She got some kind of infection after having a simple surgery, died within a week. She was on all sorts of pain killers the whole time and was more or less brain dead because of them. I will never be able to forget the look in her face the night she died. :/

>>2083306
I can't even remember my grandmother anymore, and it scares me, what with how close a family we were for those first five years. Every Sunday the whole family (My family, my seven cousins, and three sets of aunts and uncles) would get together and just enjoy ourselves. The adults would talk, and us kids would all sit around talking, playing with toys, all that good stuff, then we'd have a big meal, play a bit more, and go home. That stopped a bit after she died. And really, it led to my parents divorcing, and the breakdown of the whole family. I mean, most of the anger between my mother and her siblings is gone now, we just don't talk to one of my uncles much. Still hang out with his kid, we were pretty close when we were younger.

this better be here when I get back damnit

What's a hoose?

>>2083421
hose I think OP meant.
>>2073141
why doyou think the picture is ugly?

>>2083421

Its a horse without an arse.

Well, childhood, I was pretty isolated. My parents were living kind of unstable life involving lots of drinking and fighting. I never had friends or anything in terms of emotional comfort. Most of the time I dwelled in my fantasies and misbehaved a lot to get attention. I guess I'm just like a child in some ways even these days.

The main thing about it all that I consciously picked up was the realisation that no one is going to do anything for you, if you're not going to do it for yourself. Or rather that there is no need to respect anything or anyone.

The whole scene of being this small and weak child that can be tossed around at will was a pretty strong experience.

>>2073099
Does anyone know the homepage of the author of that picture? Thanks in advance.

As for my traumatic childhood experiences, by the age of six I had been through serious pneumonia three times. I was ill all the time, I never left the house and had barely any friends. As a result, I was a complete social retard and couldn't get along with kids when I finally went to school.

>>2083656
no idea. but requesting as well... /a/'s useless.

>>2083656

That's a delicious trap in your picture, isn't it?

>>2079010
You remind me a lot of myself. Except without the stone-throwing. I was a premature child and so very short. I have a weird accent for some reason, was very confident, and was teased for being smart and talking like it, too. Although I rarely do it now (I blame the internet) I would regularly pepper my sentences with long and obscure words which most people in my primary school had never heard of. When I was in grade one, we were doing that 'how many words can you make with these letters' and I insisted that ion was a word. I even knew what it meant, too...

I really hate my voice. It makes me sound like an idiot. I cringe when I hear myself speak. It's a lot worse on microphone, too. My voice is very nasally, my mum said it's because my vocal cords weren't properly formed, but that's shit.

I think my most traumatising experience was when I found out I had hereditary depression. It was only last year. My parents neglected to tell me. I was told I was 'sensitive'. I never would have found out about it if we weren't talking about...I don't remember what, in the car, and my mum felt the need. 'Oh by the way you have depression.'

It fucks up my mind how I was lied to for 17 years.

>>2083831
/a/non here, http://www.pixiv.net/index.php?id=33872
I love how he does those eyes...

I was used as a cumdumpster from the ages of 5 - 8.

I used to get beaten up every day.

Someone ripped my earlobe off and my parents superglued it back on and told me to suck it up

Someone stomped my ankle until it fractured. My parents thought I was lying and made me go back to school the next day.

I've been self harming since I was 4.

I watched my dad try to kill my mother.

I watched mum attack dad with a knife.

One day I was playing with some 'friends'. We played the "open your mouth and close your eyes" game. They dumped a pacifier in dog shit and stuck it in my mouth.

I used to cry under the desks every few days at school.

A boy tried to drown me in a really deep puddle by pushing my face into it with his foot and laughing while I flailed and screamed and tried to get free.

I had no friends until I went to high school.

I was bullied all the way through primary school.

When I was 10, someone shot a squirrel with an air rifle and then put it on my head.

>>2083946
what the hell

everytime I click on the images it just sends me to another bunch of images

anyone just upload all of it?

>>2083983

i think i could spend the rest of my life with you.

>>2083939
OMFG

You're fuckin' Dexter! HAHA!

Boohoo people, my childhood has been the same. Serious domestic violence, Mum attempting to take her life in front of me. Cut wrists, blood everywhere, Foster care, fucked up socially.

But there are people worse off and It hasn't affected me as much as it had affected you guys.

(Btw my mum was a street kid, and some of the stories of her growing up make all your childhoods look like a lovely middle-class upbringing.

>>2083983

That's shit. Who would want to hurt a squirrel?

>>2073195
empathising with that. well not in the literal sense ofc.

It's amazing, how incapable I am of human feelings anymore. I understand reading these that there should be a reaction, anything. Pity, sympathy, a basic empathy response.

Nothing.

Can I even call myself human?

One time at school I got ganged up on by a bunch of jocks. I had my swiss army knife with me so I pulled it on them and stabbed on guy in the leg and another in the shoulder. I also slashed some other prick in the arm. I returned to class with blood running from my eye, lots of bruises and blood on my hands. I got expelled from that school and I have been a deceitful lying bastard child ever since. Not saying I am exactly traumatized, but in the least I am fucked up.

>>2084287
Congratulations. Your a sociopath.

>>2074516
shut the fuck up? measly crybaby.
i don't care for my parents either, and i know it's eating them up.
not about you.

>>2077363
you're kind of retarded it seems to me. enjoy trying to live, the way you do.

>>2079010
Fancy some casual Butt secks?

My dad was a painter. He did landscapes and such. MY mother was about 10 years younger than him, and loved the idea of being in love with an artist more than she loved my dad. When she got pregnant with my older sister
my dad got this idea in his head of being a family of bohemian artist roaming the countryside together.

By the time I was born (child #4) the family had moved out of the townhouse in Rockville and were somewhere in Podunk, Virginia. For the first 16 years of my life, the longest we ever stayed in any town was 2 years. We once rented a house for a grand total of 4 months in Gore WV. MY dad could never hold down a job. He spent more money on pot and oil paints that he did on food for a family of 6.

I never learned anything in school, some places were to far ahead of what I'd learned in past schools some were behind. I never made friends. It wasn't worth it. We'd be gone in a few months, and we never lived in a town with a population of more than 700., and even with that we always lived outside of town on a farm or in a run down shack on the side of a mountain.

(field too long)

>>2084405
My mother committed suicide when I was 5. After she was gone my dad went even more crazy. He started beating us, and all kinds of shit. He used to take the plastic rod that's used to adjust blinds, and smack us so hard with them that they molded to the curve of our sides. His favorite punishment for me was to lock me in a closet. And leave me there. For 30 ... 40 hours at a time. My sister Joanne killed herself when I was 8, and my brother Charlie disappeared when I was 14. Once I swallowed all the medication in the house. Prescription pills to NyQuil... but I guess none of it was that harmful.

I am afraid of the dark. I'm afraid to go outside sometimes. I am afraid when the telephone rings and I don't know why. I am incredibly aggressive. I have no sense of other peoples emotions. Only the barest sense of what is acceptable behavior in public. I bite myself and tear at my hair. I have unending anxiety over every minor action i take.

I think if not for the few years I had with my mother, and the little help I go from my siblings, I would be one of those feral children, who can't talk and walk on all fours.

>>2084409
at least you've got that bitchin story to tell


or are you physically unattractive or something

>>2073256
this is the rationalization a lonely person has concocted after being brainwashed in therapy

>>2084409
What ever happened to Daddy?

>>2073347
you sound like such a faggot

>>2084409
just get a prescription anxiolytic, paxil is like what, 40$ a month? all it takes to fix that aggressivity/constant-state-of-alert problem

>>2084452
It's not just the anxiety. I'm barely a functional human. I'm pretty much autistic.

eh not much, not much. About 10-12 years of physical abuse at the hands of both my mother and my stepmother, some psychological abuse (ie like mother locking me in and then leaving with my sister saying she's going to kill my sis) and my mother eventually "creating" an alternate persona (aptly named "evil mother", I kid you not) that she used to blame all the abuse on after it happened (as everyone would just go back to norma after it). Had some incest (not fucking, mainly just touching) with one of my sisters when we were both younger (consentual) that may or may not be related to the abuse, dunno. Sexually used (not exactly abused, as there was no force involved, I guess he relied on my curiosity) by an elder brother for maybe 2-3 years. Had to watch a lot of physical fights between mother and father, and mother and grandparents. Didn't stay in one school more then 2 years (and most just one year) until I reached high school due to moving between parents and grandparents, so no real concept of a stable environment.

But other then that, I don't have many traumatic childhood experiences.

>>2073256
>>2073272
HELLO, YOU ARE ME

do you have trouble listening to music, too? There is music I enjoy, and music I despise, but I've never had any sort of desire to sing along, dance to, or cry to a song. I just like the noise distraction. I never think 'wow this is a masterpiece' it's usually just "wow this doesn't suck."

at shows I usually just stand around thinking about my day or the way the band is dressed. I always point observations out to my friends and they're like "huh? dude, the music!"

what the fuck, is there a drug for this shit

>>2081718
this fucking sucks. for both of you.

>>2073791

:(:(:(:(

afgafg3423525

archive this shit.

2353245624562v 1 vbb61

>>2073791

Ironically, I wish the same sometimes but because then I would not have to have this emotional attachment to parents that probably don't deserve it.

>>2081785
Read that in his voice.

I fucking died laughing.

My childhood was fucking awesome, hahahahaha

>>2079575
well I'm 19 now. I left high school at 16 because of the agoraphobia, so things are better despite only having a few friends and being used by several until now
I was desperate to be connected, so put out for anyone.
My 23 yr old ex left me for a 15 year old, so i had a breakdown after that.
I still can't work, I don't go out much. But the people who picked on me all have kids and suck now so I'm better off despite crippling depression.
>>2083939
I have hereditary depression too..shit sucks, though i knew it before anyone told me.
I wasn't premature, just really small. even now I'm not even 5ft.
I just quit working on tv because I couldn't take it, I never went to uni, so many wasted opportunities...

another story the buttsecks comment brought up after this..

So!
since i was born I had IBS or some other strange bowel thing, they said it had something to do with shitting as a baby, and it hurting, so I just refused since then....this involved lots of overnight stays in hospital (one where i got out of the car and stepped into what resembled a liver and a trail of blood going into the hospital) and receiveing..enemas and suppositories.
This, was pretty traumatic. being pinned down and having things forced into you while screaming and crying as a 5 year old is not helping me very well. the medications they gave me made me very sick, so i developed a phobia of vomiting.

I still suffer from all this stuff but just try get on with it, though terrified I will someday day after a month of not shitting and being poisoned by my own toxins. I still provide buttsex for boyfriend, though cannot relax and so it hurts, I'm scared of people going near my ass :D
another point, while many depressed people self harm, I tried and it never worked for me. seeming like a cry for attention. though the only way to get decent psychiatric help now a days is to try kill yourself... the only thing I wanted to do was break my arms, leaving no visible scars and being easy to make cover stories for.

>>2074994
> never did get to play the saxophone...
This affected me more than it should have...I'm sorry anon.

>>2080069
You have to be one of the best people I have ever seen posting on 4chan. Congratulations on making me believe one more time that there are still good people in the world.

>>2085095
did you miss the part where he goes on to fuck that girl (when they are older)?

>>2083946
Thanks a lot. I went through all of the pictures and saved them one by one. Just because they are that awesome.

http://rapidshare.com/files/162526078/IDOLMASTER_drawings_by_Riyo__10.11.08_.rar

Raped by a kid on a secluded playground when I was five. He must've been 15 or so. I never dared to tell anyone.
Went through the brooding, the cutting, won the Slut of the year award at least five years in a row, did the drugs, got the T-shirt.

Now I'm 28. I've had therapy for 3 yrs following an overdose and 2 months at a closed psychiatric ward.
Life is awesome these days.

Pic related - that's how I was like from 12 to 25

i had an awesome childhood (i lived in this awesome neighborhood like on hey arnold, but even better) . Teens (13-18) were kind of dull because i moved into a neighborhood with all old people and dicks i didn't want to hang out with. No real Traumatic childhood experiences.

I was born two months premature. When i was one, i was dropped on the porch. When i was two, i had pneumonia. when i was three, i had chicken pox. when i was four, i fell down the stairs and broke six ribs. when i was five, my uncle was decapitated by a watermelon. when i was six, my parents hit me in the head with a shovel. when i was seven, i lost my right index finger to my pet rat. when i was eight, my dog Spike got hit by a tractor. when i was nine, my mom lost her arm to a rabid cow. when i was ten, my sister was torn to bits by a pack of dogs. when i was eleven , my grandfather killed himself because i was ugly. when i was twelve, my grandmother killed herself because i was ugly. when i was thirteen, my father poked out his eyes with a pitchfork in a drunken stupor. when i was fourteen, my father lost his hand to a wallaby. when i was fifteen, my aunt choked to death by a chicken bone. when i was sixteen. i lost my cousin to a badger. when i was seventeen, i cut my left big toe with a hoe. when i was eighteen, my father lost his toe to the same tractor that killed my dog.

>>2085821
Please write a book.

>>2085821
oh and +1 internet if you know what game this is from without searching for it. If you know then you can call yourself an oldfag of the vidya

>>2085821
IS DAT SUM FALLOUT 1?!

>>2085821
oh come on now, your just making shit up

>>2085834
>>2085904

mootblockdodganxEdahf

>>2085834
>>2085895
>>2085904
Too bad i cant say that i played the game. Some dude made a dumb character and recorded his progress to show how the game treats dumb characters. copy paste was some depressed dude in vault 13.

link
http://fromearth.net/LetsPlay/Fallout%202/Update%2010/index.html

When I was 8 my mother commited suicide.
My father followed suit 4 years later.

Raised until 18 by an Aunt and Uncle.

There is nothing wrong with me at all. My sister however, is a bipolar depressive with severe anxiety disorder. She's all sorts of fucked up.

>>2085955
the fact that you're even here shows that there is something terribly wrong with you

>>2079739
Yeah, there was also newer reasearch to prove that you prefer the company of men in a sexual context.

See? I can make shit up to.

Grew up without a father, he left before I was born and I haven't seen him once in my entire life. I had a stepfather who I thought was my dad but as I got older, maybe about 7 or 8, I realized he didn't give a shit about me.
I was molested twice when I was young, the first time by my older brother when I was 4-5(though I honestly can't remember it fully, must have blocked it out) and by a kid who was about 11 or 12 who lived up the street from me when I was 6.
It happened in an abandoned lot, then during the middle of it one of my older sister friend's who lived near said lot caught us, everyone in the neighborhood got involved and the one thing I remember most was bawling my eyes out because I thought I was about be given the beating of a lifetime. That didn't happeen but I was put in therapy which I only stopped attending of my own free will just a few years ago.
When I was 8 years old, someone taped an M-80 firecracker to my mothers window late at night. Being that I was in the room directly next to hers(and the walls were pretty thin) I heard pretty much the full blast. to this day I can't sit still without my skin shaking.
as far as school goes I was always picked on as far back as kindergarten. in fact, everyday afterschool in kindergarten this kid in class would beat me up or just generally make fun of me. One day after class he tried to stab me with a pair of scissors, and I'm not talking about those brightly colored safety scissors, I talking about those cutting-up construction paper scissors. after that my mom just pulled me out of school for the rest of the year.

>>2086538
when I was nine I was introduced to the younger brother of one of my sister's boyfriends. his name was mike and we hung out almost every weekend for a year. we played video games together,spent entire days bike-riding,etc. One day he just stopped coming around and I didn't see him again for about three months. Then when I finally did run into him at the local convience store, he pretend to not even know me. my spirit was crushed. I didn't really get close to anyone after that.
Then when I was 11 I found out my mom was a lesbian, which really threw me for a loop. not to mention when I moved two years later I got made fun of by the local kids because of it.
from the age of 13-17 I really didn't have any friends, the only people who hung out with me were kids of my older sisters friends, and I knew they were only hanging out with me because of my video game collection.
junior high school and high school were pretty much a blur because at that time in my life I really didn't give a shit about anything.
and now i'm 22, I live at home and I fap about 6-8 times a day. Sure, I've contemplated suicide but I always looked at that as the coward's way out. I plan to get my life together sometime or another I just don't know when.

>>2073144

In case it hasn't been said.

Shit sucks.

I was 10 years old. My dog was my best friend, I had had him for as long as I could remember. I knew he was old, but I thought he would just always be around.. Because for my whole life, he was. His name was Sammy.

We were playing fetch in the backyard. He got tired easily, so after a few minutes he lied down in the grass like he always does. I went inside to get some lemonade. When I came back out, I saw that he was chewing on a plant. There were many poisonous plants where I lived, so I ran over to get the plant out of his mouth. That made him mad and he bit my throat and I died.

I'm black, nuff said.

I hate threads like this, they look fucking awesome but I know I'm never going to read through the whole thing.

I was an incredibly disturbed and violent child (still am, if it aint broke and such), and even though there wasnt much trauma for me, I did ruin some other childhoods.
My neighbors used to have this huge, behemoth of a pitful that they kept in a huge cage because he was batshit insane, and everyone called him monster.
I used to go around the neighborhood catching cats, both pets and strays I suppose, to bring back to my house.
I would toss them into the cage and watch as monster chased them down, tore them apart, and ate them.
It was better than cartoons. One time another little boy caught me just as I tossed the cat in and said he was going to tell. I took out my trust little pocket knife (barely even had an edge) and grabbed his shirt and held it to his neck, which pretty much made him freeze up.
I made him watch the dog catch and eat the cat, and I told him that if he ever told, I would throw him in next and let monster gobble HIM all up, instead.
I let him go and he went home- he didnt talk again for almost a year, I remember him during school, and I would always catch his eye and grin at him across the room.
We were both about 7.
Gooooood times, brah, gooooood times.

>>2086764
Dude, what?
Mootenbloxin maximus.

>>2086764
I hate you with a firey passion.

>>2087146
Yeah, I get that a lot, surprisingly.
Your rage both amuses and nourishes me.

>>2086764

If I was that other 7 year old boy, I would've snuck up behind you with a cinder block as you were watching your sick little display. When I was right behind you I would've gone "PSST!" and right as you turned around, I would've smashed the cinder block down into your face with all my might.

Then I would've run home and pretended it never happened, as you lie there choking on your own blood. I would try not to laugh my head off when your mommy called our home asking if we knew where you were.

Even as I child, I was a self-righteous prick. It feels so good to be just as bad as you are/were, and on top of it, to be RIGHT. That's the meaning of "Justice".

>>2086764
A monster is you

>>2086598
thanks you
just
THANK YOU

>>2086764
Here, with another tale of childhood hijinks!
Before that, a little boy lived next to me who was kind of a sheltered kid and really gullible. He used to think that I was his best friend, but whenever he came over he was not allowed to touch my toys, as he would decrease their future potential value, and I only wanted him there so I could torture him. I would convince him of all sorts of things- his parents didnt really love him, the world was going to come to an end in just a few years, but my favorites? I had a whole cast of creatures and monsters that I convinced him were real and which were, of course, out to get him.
It was even more perfect, because even then, I was obsessed with Halloween, masks, scary things, and the whole like. I had a whole trunk of Halloween costumes and gear, and I used it a lot more than my "toybox."

>>2087395
So, I would tell him about these creatures, and then at night I would sneak out of my bedroom window in one costume or another (I never let him look in my "secret trunk), and would creep over to his bedroom window,
I would get his attention one way or another- tapping the glass, rattling the window a bit, making soft weird noises. At first he would just lie there and...stare, froze in horror, and I would do things like act like I was trying to get in or just just standing there and staring at him, watching him start to hyperventilate. Eventually he would cut loose screaming and run out of the room, at which point I would scamper back to my room and get out of costume, just in case his parents came to investigate.
He developed insomnia, some nervous conditions, and became a severe bed wetter. One day he was just...gone, and soon after his parents moved away too, and for the longest time I never knew just why. Eventually though my mom told me what happened- he had apparently finally suffered a nervous break down or something due to his "hallucinations" and his parents sent him to some child treatment center before moving closer to the center.
Sometimes, before I go to sleep, I like to think he committed suicide somewhere down the line from it all.
Boys will be boys.

>>2087317
Yeah, because a lot of 7 year olds can sneak stealthily up behind people while holding a cinder block
Next time, dont try to be such an internet tough guy to show off for all the cyber babes, and just opt for a brick.
Less impressive, but it gets the job done.
Trust me on this one.
The difference between us isnt some imaginary concept like "justice", its just that you are a self righteous asshole about it while Im just having fun fun fun.

>>2083168

That is fucking awesome. tell me more.

When I was in kindergarten or so, I had to REALLY take a shit, so I went to the bathroom, did my business and all, but after I was done there was no toilet paper. In-case it isn't this way in every school, taking a shit at school would earn you eternal mockery. So I decided to wipe my shit all over the wall, It took me a couple minutes to get it off but in the end my ass was clean, but the wall was covered in tracks of shit. I walked out quietly hoping noone would see me ( I also did not flush the toilet, thought it didn't matter to people if I flushed if they saw the wall covered in shit ).

After the deed was done, I continued to play with lego's, building blocks, and other stuff as kindergartens do. Near the end of the day the teacher walks into the bathroom and comes out absolutely enraged she screams "WHO DID THIS" and everyone points at the class rat, after she leaves the class everyone bursts into laughter and the kid who took the blame was crying.

Not really traumatic, but I learned that I can get away with everything if I blame it on someone else.

>>2087443

Oh you're such a cold-hearted monster, giving me advice on how to hypothetically smash your 7 year-old self's head in.

Listen, I don't give a shit about your fun, and I know I'm a self-righteous bastard. Like I said, I have been since I was a little munchkin. I also know we're similar. Except I get off on pursuing and destroying low-life scum like you that "deserve" it, while you will pick on anything weaker than you. So in the end, the weak find a sick fuck like me to protect them from sick fucks like you.

That's the real difference. In the eyes of society, I'm "legitimate"; I even make a living from my sick pursuit. And you, you are just bottom feeding trash.

WHen I was sixteen I was staying after school for chess club, and that the school woods in fall was the most relaxing place to be; I would find this cliff to read off of; it was surrounded by trees, wind gently blowing, leaves falling, it was so serene.
But one day when I got there in the woods, I could ehar struggling and not screaming, but loud, muffled noises of terror. So I drop my stuff and start hauling out towards the noise, and lo and behold, there's some guy about twenty years old, molesting a girl I kinda knew (she was in my AP Biology class; we talked a couple times, but we weren't exactly friends yet). I pretty much knew that if I didn't step in she was going to get raped and/or killed, so I pretty much came in swinging.
I'm not a weak guy at all; I got my black belt in Tae Kwon Do, so I know how to fight, but this guy was a foot taller than me, and outweighed me by a good fifty pounds, and he was all muscle.
Long story short, I got stabbed in the chest a few times, but I ended up breaking his legs with a rock and we (me and the girl) ran off.
He wasn't there when the cops went back.

>>2087662
Oh come on now, have more taste than that, old boy. If I was going to be a "cold hearted monster" I would have gone into useless lurid detail in order to shock the general masses. But then, Im not a try too hard failure at life, and so I merely pointed out what I took to be the obvious, i.e., brick beats cinderblock.
And really, whatever you need to tell yourself to sleep at night, sport. It doesn't really make a whole lot of difference to me one way or another. We're both sick, probably with a whole mess of crossed wires, it's just that my targets are more or less random and without forethought other than the fact that they are there, whereas for some reason, you get your rocks off from being the hero. Whats the matter, compensating for something? You're nothing more than another facet in the pathetic delusion of those weak masses you so claim to love, I hope you're pleased with yourself. I don't know which is more pathetic, the big, booming shield or the trembling arm that lifts it up to hide itself.
And I take offense to that! I happen to take great pride in my culinary tastes and habits!
In the end, for all your tough talk and pseudo rationalization, you and I are part of the same damn coin, it's just that you pulled up heads and I got tails. The universe is a funny place like that.

>>2087463

Well, hmm.

I'm pretty sure that wearing them for my entire life has had an effect on my balls and cock growth. My boyfriend dwarfs me in this area, but he also is six foot eight.

Really, there isn't too much more to tell about it other than some childhood stories. I lead the life of an average college kid, I love power metal, and I'm gay with a closet full of girl's underwear.

i was afraid of whoopee cushions as a kid and one time my aunt threw a whole bunch of them at me and theres a video somewhere of me cowering in fear and screaming because of the ravenous whoopee cushions surrounding me.

2 years ago, when i was 15, during a routine air soft skirmish in a small wood near my house, cops came and thought we had real guns. I got shot in the leg, and my bone shattered, and my buddy had to have two fingers amputated. Apparently, someone walking their dog thought it was gang wars or something. We got an out of court settlement for 200,000 dollars, but i was really fucked up for a while. My friend is still depressed.

My mom used to beat me all the time because I reminded her of my father. I remember once coming home form school, she started yelling at me about a homework assignment I didn't turn in. She eventually started choking me and pushing me onto the staircase, just beating the shit out of me. I was in 2nd grade that time and I remember everything so vividly.

>>2088244
Was...was she hot?

When I was 3, I cut my middle finger trying to jump off my couch. There was a nail sticking out of the couch.

I ran around my house, screaming bloody murder. My whole house was covered in blood, and it looked like a murder scene.

After we got it under control and cleaned up and stuff, I looked at the scar. It was two inches long, down the middle of my middle finger.

And I still have the scar to prove it.

Fuck jumping off shit now.

I've always been very paranoid. When I was young, around 8 or 9 but also later periodically, I would go into hiding at the first sound of something around the house, because it was OBVIOUSLY ROBBERS

Also, Whenever I left the class in 2nd grade to pee I would think the class was having a secret No Anon Allowed Party

>>2087404
>>2087395
>>2086764
Are you, ya know..less of a monster now?

>>2088625
Actually Ive gotten a great deal worse, if anything. I am good at concealing it when I feel like it, though.

When I was 9, a kid pissed on me in the school bathroom. I never used public restrooms again until I was 15.

>>2088376
Similar story. I was jumping off a bed, my cousin kicked me in the back, and my foot came swinging down really fast and hit the corner of the bed's metal frame. You know, those brown-rust colored metal frame beds with jagged edges? Yeah, it was extremely sharp, it went in about an inch and a half into the soft soft middle of my foot, and it bled and bled and I walked funny for a long time. FUCK that memory sucks, I cringed hopping off beds for years.

>>2087857
fuuuuuuck that is hot.

>>2086764
Am I the only one who thinks this is fucking awesome?
>>2087857
You are delicious.

>>2089264
Obviously not. Just as obviously you're one of a small minority of people who actually believes it's *true*.

>>2078504
I figured out the same thing when I was 4. While I was falling to sleep I would repeat to myself, "I don't wanna die I don't wanna die I don't wanna die...etc."

When I was about 8 years old, I was eating some sort of brownies or something at the dinner table and my brother (who was 20 years old at the time) flipped the fuck out because I was playfully hoarding them from him. I thought he knew I was playing around. Apparently not.

He came around the table quickly with his arms outstretched and his face contorted. Young and naive as I was, I assumed he was going to hurt the cat curled up by the sliding glass door. I never imagined that he would hurt me. I flung my little girl body over the cat to protect it, but he grabbed me around the ribcage and threw me over the couch nearby. Using just his fists, he then hit me as hard as he possibly could 8-10 times in the spine before my parents thought to stop him.

I laid in bed for the next 6 hours crying. I could barely walk the next day. I didn't want to go to school, but my parents forced me. I went to school, came home, and immediately went to my room and stayed there, only coming out to go to the bathroom. My dad brought food to me. It went on like this for a few weeks.

Now, I am extremely defensive and respond violently to offensive body language. I hate it when people touch me. I tense up when friends hug me and push them away. If someone gets too close to my face when arguing with me, I completely flip out and just start screaming. If someone starts looking like they're going to strike me, my heart starts beating faster and I put my arms in front of me to protect myself.

I also fear angering men now. I've been a complete pushover with the few boyfriends that I've had. I profusely apologize every time I argue with them and grovel if they are genuinely angry because I know I can't stop them from hurting me if they wanted to.

>>2090552
this breaks my heart ;_;

>>2073347

where do you live and what's your first name?

>>2090552
Your brother's a fucking psycho. What's he doing now?

>>2090552

When you were born, you stole his momma away. It wasn't the cookies.
As long as you dont plan on stealing anyone else's momma you should be OK on the physical front
Best of luck.

>>2076395

are you black? i lol'd imagining this

Shit, I'd totally forgotten about this, reading ( >>2087567 )'s story made me think of it.

Well, for some reason I don't really understand, I was in the first couple of years of school, we were like 5 or 6, I remember doing finger painting and saying to this girl next to me "I need to go to the toilet". She said to tell the teacher, I did, and they let me go.

When I got there I stood infront of the urinal...and just pissed myself. On purpose. It confuses me. I remember it felt awesome. I just pissed myself and completely soaked my trousers, then went back to the teacher and told her, had to change into some spare underwear they kept for such occasions. Come to think of it, it might be something to do with why I have a bit of a piss fetish now...I had bed wetting problems for a few years too when I was 13 or so, but I always put that down to stress. Weird.

>>2093938
also, I'm 100% serious that I got a boner writing that. Lol.

>>2089264
Wow, this is still around, huh?
And no, you aren't considering I thought that I also thought it was awesome, obviously, but this does not bode well for your mental health, oh my brother.

Hoh. I had an awesome childhood. Playing the vidya and with my friends. I was the bully-buster at school . First with violence and later by making friends with the bullied. I got my moral standards from my parents and relatives and I have lived according to them my whole life.
I have two loving parents and three awesome brothers whom I could sacrifice my life for if needed. The only minus thing in my life is my lack of employment.

When I was 18 my girlfriend was 9.

I'll forever regret that we didn't meet until 12 years after that.

>>2073791

This is the saddest story I've read so far.

When I was 11, I was bit by a brown recluse spider. As the bite swelled up on my face, my mother and father took one look at me and burst out laughing.

I nearly died that day.,

>>2074994

It's alright man...all the band kids in high school WERE faggots (no, not homosexuals.)


(I'm really only saying this to cheer you up, before you flip out. Look at the bright side, ya know?)

Seriously. This one really annoying (to everyone, not t just me) kid started harassing the fuck out of me on the bus one Friday morning, so I told him to shut the fuck up or I'd hit him once I got off.

Guess who didn't shut the fuck up?

Guess who got punched right between the eyes so hard that he was gushing blood and crashed into a brick pillar, toppling over afterward?

...Guess what instrument he played?

>>2096838
I don't mean to be mean and I hope you forgive me but that was a funny story and I lol'd.
:(

When I was a kid I was at a Y for one of those week session during the weeks I'd have off from school in the Winter and Spring. Got beat up badly in a closet by some of the kids in our session on Friday. Kids were banned, the counselors were fired and banned for letting it happen.

>>2080069

holyshitthatsawesome GO LITTLE YOU!

>>2080203

holyshitthatsstillawesome YOU SIR ARE A WINNER!

More. Like. THIS.

>>2074326
Been there, done that. Still going through that with so-called friends at 30.

My life has just been one smooth sailing so far.

I was born prematurely, but am about 6'6" tall, and weigh a good 210 pounds, so I've never really been picked on, or harassed in any really noticeable way. I'm also pretty fucking smart, and have a real good memory. I've had more or less perfect grades throughout my education, and I'm now in university and things are still pretty easy for me to get.

I've always been able to make friends, or to put it more correctly, people easily make friends with me. It's like I'm instantly likable. I get on fine with just about everyone, teachers, parents, siblings, friends, authorities, you name it. However, I'm not a very social person (at least I don't think so), I have a hard time to put myself in a group of people and then just join in on any discussion. I think it's because all my time growing up I've always made friends with the coolest and most attractive kids in class, and compared to them I couldn't really contribute shit, unless for the occasional joke or some help with studies.

So because of that, I always feel that I must bring something genuinely interesting, or funny to the table. Just making an off-hand comment, or just some simple observation is near-impossible to me, I need whatever I say to "matter" so-to-speak.

Eh, my rant will continue!

I propose we archive this thread for great justice, unless it's already been done.

>>2073268
trust me, you don't wanna be like this guy.. i'm' like this guy, empty on the inside, and it sucks ass. you're lucky you still have your emotions running hot

>thread still up

Goodbye, next 2 hours.

>>2097662

I constantly judge whatever I say, to be sure that it really is funny/interesting. This sort-of glides over to me being unable to tell any real anecdotes or stuff that has happened to me, in a spontaneous discussion. I'm pretty well-traveled and I've seen some amazing things, it's just that I suck at describing things without having to think about just how I'm going to phrase it to justify my experience.

It's easier to just recount stuff that I read about on the internet or in the paper, as the part of telling what happened already has been done, and I can just repeat that.

But I digress, I haven't had a single traumatic, or even dramatic experience in my life really. Yeah, my grandpa died when I was like 9, but I didn't know him that well and so it wasn't really a loss. I've never really been real angry, or real sad about anything. (I still feel joy and other happy feeling, so I'm no Dexter.) It's just, I get mildly upset at the most, and that passes relatively quickly.

Also, I've never ever fought with my parents in any significant way. I never rebelled, I never screamed at them nothing. All this I keep hearing about the "Ravages of puberty" makes me baffled. Going from 10 to 18 for me was really just about noticing girls more, and hair growing from weird places. No mood swings, no sever acne, nothing of that sort.

I also have a born-handicapped little brother who I've had to take care of my entire life really. (Moved away now, but up until now.) So maybe that forced me to mature in like a week or something, I dunno.

>>2073647
dude same here... i literally feel nothing. i don't even give a shit about video games or anything

>>2097686
Submitted it for archiving.

>>2073195
>>2073195
I know you don't care or understand but I fucking love you.

>>2090552
awwwwww. I wish I knew you so we could chat. *gives a cig

Well , My mother died (from what I heard) when she gave birth to me and my sister. My sister was took by some governor and I had to go live with my uncle and aunt. Long story short I met some smuggler , fought some soldiers. Made out with my twin sister WHO BECAME A FUCKING Princess. Killed my father (who was evil) and married someone who tried to kill me. My life is fucked up.

>>2097662
>>2097763
Dude, I'm the same up until personal details but I couldn't find a way to articulate it. Constantly overthinking things too, playing out conversations in a way I'd like them to go, thinking of my next response way ahead of time. Law of the Universe that it never goes anywhere near what I had expected and preparation is in vane. I have pride in being the smart one of my peers but often make off the cuff remarks or purposely mishear things and question them in a humourous way. It can come off as ditzy but I'm no good with anecdotes, which are usually the things that keep people interested.

moar sexual abuse/ molestation stories plox

I was once bitten by an ostrich.

I was at camp when I was about 9 or 10. My teacher summoned me to his room. He was red in the face; angry as hell. He proceeded to shout at me louder and more viciously than I've ever been shouted at before. I pissed myself.

I remember he had a Kickers shirt.

ever since birth i've been chemically imbalanced and so im extremely sensitive, got depressed for now reason, and had ADD. In preschool up until 6th grade I would become personally attached to inanimate objects after just holding them for a while and would have a tough decision b/t playing w/ frnds w/out the object of playing alone w/ it.
in 1st grade i was made fun of (idk y) and that lasted up until 4th grade
my depression/sensitivity meds were slowly increasing
then came 6th grade-9th grade
in 6th grade i went to a new school and was picked on relentlessly for no reason that i could tell
this continued up until 9th grade just relentless making fun of for no reason i could think of and with no "real friends" (nobody i hung out w/ could have fun w/ out making fun of me) this was basically everyone i knew
in 8th grade i tried to strangle myself with a belt but i couldnt do it and im glad
from 6th grade to 9th grade my depression meds increased greatly to where i was taking about 400mg a day (which is a fucking lot to those who dont know)
my family got sued for something my dad didnt do and his best friend/lawyer was the cause of it all and just left him
we are currently bankrupt (im a sophomore inb4 underrage b&) and had to move to texas
i was in a private school now im in public
i love it so much better here but im still emotionally scarred and afraid of everything i say will be made fun of so now i only say things that i know will be interesting/funny

>>2073791
Oh god. In the part of having a bad childhood and egocentrism... i had it too. They didn't let me play soccer because I didn't play well... and other things. :\

>>2098040
noy traumatic at all, I've been bitten by them too and it's like closing a notebook with your hand inside.
>>2098019
stop writing like that.

I'm a girl and I have social anxiety disorder, combined with obsessive compulsive personality disorder. When I was in kindergarten through second grade, my mom used to force me to have "play dates" with people so I would do something besides play by myself in my room.

I absolutely hate being touched in any way, and that started when I was in seventh grade when I found out my friends were using me, my mom blamed me for two different instances where she gave birth to stillborn daughters, and I found out my parents hated each other. I've only recently forced myself to be able to hug my relatives again, and be able to walk in hallways without being pressed to a wall for the fear of someone accidentally brushing against me.

For some reason, weird, 30-35 year old men always become infatuated with me at work. I work at a gym, and I don't understand why. I'm not particularly attractive, and I really have nothing to offer aside from my v-card. None of them have known that though. The most recent is a guy that works in operations, so I see him a lot, and I try to be nice, but I'm freaking out because he tries to put his hand on my shoulder, poke me to joke around, etc. I try not to let anyone know, but I told him last week. He didn't believe me, because I've gotten good at covering up a lot of the visible anxiety, so I come off as relatively normal.

I live in constant fear that someone will touch me, so it's pretty much hell having to do anything aside from sit on the internet in my room.

Does anyone else feel guilty that they wish their childhood was more traumatic?

To explain away certain things about yourself, or just because it makes you seem like a more interesting person?

I know it's sorta sad, and I feel guilty about it, but am I the only one who feels this way?

This thread is making me sad now.

im going to find you and when i do i will touch you

i was really imaginative as a kid, so i would always play pretend with my friends in elementary.

well, one day, we decided to re-enact a scene from batman & robin, I think it was. where poison ivy gave robin a poison kiss, right?

i pretend-kissed my friend, meaning we didn't lock lips at all. just blew kisses, really. we were both female.

up until i moved to another city, which was in 9th grade, everyone made fun of me for being a lesbian.

so much so, that i wonder if i am to this day.


also: step-brother fucked me in the ass when i was ten. i bled.

>>2098143
My life is exactly like yours, but with fewer middleaged men hitting on me. I would like to someday meet someone like us.

Generally, my early childhood was great.
A good amount of friends, fit, good grades...
Then as a teen, I slacked off and pushed Bs.
Generally, the most traumatic thing about my childhood was not starting puberty until 17.
I am now 26 and bitter.

Autismfag here. Childhood was obviously unusual due to my eccentric ways but otherwise I gained a small following of friends that still are today. Parents did the usual yelling over minor things but, Hell, who didn't? Only major thing mother did was lift me by the hair once when I was being smarmy with a homework assignment.

I did have a sexual encounter with this other autistic guy when he was introduced through some stupid program. I was 9, he was 14. We played "Power Rangers" by rubbing our nipples together and touched dick. Balls never touched, so I turned out to be straight after all.

I feel really sorry for all the girl here:(
I hope y'all don't come to hate men for it, but after reading some of what some of you have gone through I wouldn't hold it against you.

sorry.

>>2098900
holy shit
that sucks dude
did you get injections or something to speed it up

I was undressed by an older boy and fondled many times when I was around seven

I don't even find it particularly traumatic but now I used to have a lot of problems with my sexuality.

here is the list
raped 3-4 years old
almost died in a fire 4-5 years old
beaten
beaten some more
beaten some more
almost died of starvation 6 ish
almost drowned at the pool 6 ish
beaten some more
almost died of starvation again 9 years old
beaten some more
hit in the head with a golf club 10 years old
dad almost died in car accident
he is a horrible drunk the whole time, too.
dad keeps custody of me the whole time.
first mom is a schizophrenic
second mom is a psychopath (starved me and beat me a ton)
third mom was the same person.
fourth mom was ok, didnt work though.
around there it ends.

and im basically fine.

Getting in a whirlpool hot-tub and being sucked to the bottom of the damn thing for 30 seconds before I was able to grab the guard-rail and get out

>>2098143
Not sure if you are still here or not, but if you are, there is nothing to be afraid of. I get scared when someone tries to communicate with me as well. Sometimes I think I dont deserve to have a friend, and you may feel the same. If you do, just know I am just as bad off as you are and we are equals. Neither of us should feel inferior.

My email is baratos666@yahoo.com. I have no AIM or anything. Please send me an email if you ever desire to communicate with someone who has been through what you have.

>>2098147
In a similar thread I did a wall of text about my childhood, which I said was very hard because of my father's mental problems being left untreated for so long, but many anon here thought that I had it easy, that I only had a dysfunctional family to worry about.

>>2099057
Were you molested by a priest?

>>2098143
if ya ever need a friend to talk to email me, my email's bahamut23@yahoo.com

:)

I watched my brother become a piano prodigy. I was desperate to learn guitar.

No, said my parents. Everybody who plays guitar learns piano first. That is how it is done.

I tried piano and after a year of lessons still despised it.

No guitar ever. Now I'm 20 and I have absolutely no motivation to learn it, and no other hobbies.

And my brother is a concert pianist.

>>2099135
>>2099269
Ugh, fuck you guys.

>>2073256

Holy fuck, it's me! I swear, I am the coolest fucking person ever but I'm the same as you.

>>2099297
This is the first time in my life I have encountered someone who is like me. I dont know when this chance could come up again. I just dont want to be alone anymore.