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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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hey guys, just fyi: we've got this great board called /r9k/. it's really good and we'd enjoy it if you checked it out, posted some, and stuck around for a while. see you there! toodles~

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Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:19 No.9438450

I wonder what the Emperor FEELS all day long? What doe she think about?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:19 No.9438455 "fukken...xenoooooooooos..."

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:20 No.9438467 >>9438450 She fucking she

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:21 No.9438471 >>9438467 >doe she

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:21 No.9438472 File1272277267.png-(787 KB, 604x598, WH40K Emperor - Emplying Empli(...).png) >implying the Corpse God feels

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:21 No.9438479 >>9438450 >she BURN HIM

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:21 No.9438482 Let me die...

>>	-\|- Reichsguard -\|- !!bOOhb8C7gxV 04/26/10(Mon)06:23 No.9438501 >>9438472 The Corpse God feels good man.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:24 No.9438512 I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE! BAAAWWWWWW

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:25 No.9438526 File1272277559.jpg-(87 KB, 400x391, FEELS GOOD MAN.jpg) >>9438501

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:27 No.9438538 >>9438450 man, if sanguinius wasn't so gay I wouldn't be in this damn machine

>>	Ghost !ROf1DooMsA 04/26/10(Mon)06:28 No.9438545 File1272277683.png-(186 KB, 381x380, 1269854992689.png) >>9438472

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:29 No.9438561 "why am I always surrounded by retarded zealots"

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:37 No.9438623 "I need to poop"

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:38 No.9438631 420 smoke weed erry day

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:40 No.9438652 This is what it's like inside of the Emperor's mind. All day every day. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waAsEQ6PQOo

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:41 No.9438661 meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow, meowMEOW meow meow, meow meow meow meow...

Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:42 No.9438663

"Why don't they put me in a Dread instead? Or connect to Titan? Or Titan-Dread. Yes, Titan-Dread would be awesome."
"Humanity, I am disappoint."
"Omnissiah? What the fuck? Now the Throne counts as part of me? I'm going to kick some metal asses when I finally get to move..."

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:42 No.9438670 Light banter with the chaos gods. Their war has grown somewhat genial after thousands of years.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:42 No.9438671 All day long he goes HHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:43 No.9438673 Pain. He feels pain.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:43 No.9438676 He is an eternal engine of fucken rage at people worshiping him.

Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:43 No.9438681

Well according to one book the Emperor is a massive hivemind that argues with itself and runs the imperium. Literally. He doesn't give a shit about the religious shit, and only cares that mankind survives. If he were to wake up he would be "well at least you guys are still alive."

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:44 No.9438686 > what the Emperor FEELS all day long? Hatred of xenos, mutants and traitors

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:44 No.9438689 >>9438652 Alternately, this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vy_xbXIJ898

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:45 No.9438694 File1272278726.jpg-(113 KB, 650x994, Inthefunlightnessofthe41stmill(...).jpg) >>9438670

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:45 No.9438699 >>9438661 >>9438652 No, THIS is what it's like inside his mind all day, every day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dt4zvJNXbdI

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:46 No.9438707 I LIKE TO PURGE IT PURGE IT I LIKE TO PURGE IT PURGE IT I LIKE TO PURGE IT PURGE IT YOU LIKE TO PURGE IT!!

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:48 No.9438729 >>9438694 That's pretty much it.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:48 No.9438731 >>9438699 No, THIS is what it's like inside his mind all day, every day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:49 No.9438733 He plays psyker-chess with Eldrad every day.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:49 No.9438738 >>9438733 Must be hard for Eldrad seeming he has Slaanesh's tentacle cock inside him.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:51 No.9438760 >>9438738 Not all soulstones of eldrad have become dull. A handful still functions. Oh, and the fluff says "as long as some of the soulstones still hold their glow, ELDRAD ENDURES". Now that seems familiar, doesn't it?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:54 No.9438782 >>9438760 Like Voldemort with his horcruxes?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:56 No.9438802 He dreams about twins /r/ing the comic btw

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)06:59 No.9438827 File1272279542.jpg-(358 KB, 700x990, 1259992751930.jpg) It's just him and the inspector gadget theme song all day long.

>>	Assassin Lazerus !wCN7oH.ncA 04/26/10(Mon)06:59 No.9438828 File1272279546.jpg-(21 KB, 704x361, eeeh.jpg) >>9438782 Nooo~, like the emperor of mankind. Voldemort is a pussy who only knows 1 spell and a lot of special effects.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:00 No.9438841 >>9438828 Oh so he's exactly like Eldrad.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:00 No.9438845 only know up to 2nd edition fluff... what happened to eldrad?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:01 No.9438856 >>9438827 doot te doot te dooo inspector gadget doot te doot te doo dooo doooo

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:02 No.9438862 >>9438845 he was kill by demums if I remember correctly.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:03 No.9438878 >>9438862 KILL BY DEMUNS!? Aww geez, that musta sucked. Dood was getting close to getting his pension too

Assassin Lazerus !wCN7oH.ncA 04/26/10(Mon)07:03 No.9438879
File1272279834.jpg-(34 KB, 704x396, what.jpg)

>>9438845

Eldrad tried to take back a demon infested black fortress. It worked well right until he connected with the infinity circuit, because that one wasn't possessed by a demon, but by slanesh itself.

And before he could disconnect, most of his soul was consumed. From the dozens of soulstones he made, only a handfull didn't instantly went dull.

He's pretty much dead now.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:06 No.9438893 the only thing he feels is... AWESOME!

Assassin Lazerus !wCN7oH.ncA 04/26/10(Mon)07:11 No.9438928
File1272280270.jpg-(34 KB, 704x396, hm.jpg)

>>9438878

Again, not killed by demons. He and his guard sliced their way all through a demon-infested black fortress.

But slanesh DID consume most of the eldar race in an instant, so he had no problems with one powerful psycher that treaded in his terrain.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:12 No.9438942 Braiiiiiiiiiiiinsss....I mean souuuuuuuuuuuuuuls.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:14 No.9438957 >>9438928 I just I like to use the phrase "Kill by demums" as much as possible.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:14 No.9438959 Getting EATEN BY SLANUUSH! must be the most kinkiest way of getting eaten

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)07:15 No.9438968 File1272280530.png-(727 KB, 613x582, slaaneshgreeting.png)

>>	Assassin Lazerus !wCN7oH.ncA 04/26/10(Mon)07:17 No.9438984 File1272280649.jpg-(291 KB, 1000x723, 1270961203186.jpg) Just for you guys... the picture.

Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:05 No.9439385

"Thirty-four thousand, eight hundred and sixty four bottles of beer on the wall, thirty-four thousand, eight hundred and sixty four bottles of beer,
Take one down, pass it around,
Thirty-four thousand, eight hundred and sixty three bottles of beer on the wall"

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:09 No.9439414 >>9438450 "I sure hope the Phallissars are going over well. Dickings for everyone, that's my motto. In my name I am so lonely."

Dr. Baron von Evilsatan 04/26/10(Mon)08:10 No.9439426

"Every time a human warrior dies in battle the Emperor's shrivelled eye sheds a single barely-perceptible tear. His Custodians collect each tear in a golden cup and carefully fill tiny phials wit hthe precious liquid. There are few talismans in all the galaxy as potent as the tears the Emperor weeps, suffused as they are with his unimaginable might. But so tiny is each tear that each small phial, itself but the size of the tip of the smallest finger, contains thousands of individual tears. Only in the bloodiest of wars does the Emperor weep freely, so that the golden cup runs over, foretelling of terrible destruction of the Emperor's armies."

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:11 No.9439430 You ask why we must cleanse the xenos. I will tell you. The filth of the alien and the witch must be exterminated to preserve the purity of the Human race, lest we degenerate into abomination.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:12 No.9439434 >>9438984 Why os that guy...er girl...er person panicking? I'd love that situation. Er I mean Kill all Xenos.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:13 No.9439441 >>9439426 The average lifespan of a guardsman in combat is 7.4 seconds. There are literal trillions of soldiers in the imperium. he'd have to be crying 24 hours a day.

>>	Dr. Baron von Evilsatan 04/26/10(Mon)08:15 No.9439451 >>9439441 Very small tears. Also, second edition fluff, before GW had actually grasped the size of a galactic empire.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:16 No.9439461 "I wonder if they realized Ursakar's a Primarch yet? ...Naaaah."

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:17 No.9439465 >>9439430 sniff Commissar material. commissarfucklaw.jpg

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:18 No.9439470 File1272284288.jpg-(56 KB, 540x541, 1269642579881.jpg) Emperor wish he is me.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:19 No.9439477 File1272284352.jpg-(460 KB, 1256x1024, 45865465956.jpg) THIS IS THE ABOMINATION!

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:20 No.9439483 >>9439470 >Emperor wishes, he is me. Fix'd

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:20 No.9439485 THIS is what's in his mind at all times. Occasionally, he'll regret that he can't bob his head to the endless loop. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZwhNFOn4ik

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:22 No.9439499 OMNOMNOM, dat techpriest ass... ...if I only could have an erection. Or even scratch my back. Dammit

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:23 No.9439504 rolled 17 = 17 >>9439470 Man, why does Mengsk have to be so damn manly?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:23 No.9439512 >>9439502 The emperor IS a heavy metal rock band AND the screaming audience in his head.

>>	Nephanim 04/26/10(Mon)08:23 No.9439513 >>9439477 Holy fuck, is that Lofn? And before anyone greentexts my "holy fuck" with their implications, yes, I'm referring to Slaanesh.

Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:24 No.9439517
File1272284658.jpg-(438 KB, 800x800, slow emperor or pokékind.jpg)

The fluff says the Emperor's mind has been fragmented into unknown number of pieces. Whether this is because of the imperfections in the Golden Throne, age, or consuming hundreds of human souls a day is unknown.

I think there's a heavy metal rockband playing constantly in the Emperor's head. He's rocking with himself.

Can't decide if the music is more like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Iqv9ukUtDI
or this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RERXiliJfdI

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)08:25 No.9439523 >>9439512 Sorry, caught a typo in my post and so I deleted and reposted it at >>9439517

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:05 No.9440952 >>9439517 the Emperor of Mankind : there's a party going on in his head and you're invited

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:21 No.9441081 >>9439517 I'd say it was more like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5AEs3CkOkI

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:28 No.9441132 The Eldar God of Death will have Eldrads face. Mark my words.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:28 No.9441139 >>9441081 He's actually listening to Always, because he is playing RUA.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)12:20 No.9441798 Squat Fortress. For ten thousand years, he is playing Squat Fortress, still keeeping the same fort, forever expanding. It is now ten million years old and encompasses ten solar systems. One day, it will be bigger than the Imperium.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)12:59 No.9442263 No the Emperor is listening to this all day long..... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-agl0pOQfs

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:05 No.9442348 Every now and again he detaches himself from the Golden Throne to have a sexy party with the Custodes.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:07 No.9442374 >>9442348 What happens to Warp travel in the meantime?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:09 No.9442398 >>9442374 A few thousand ships lost in the warp is a necessary sacrifice for the Emperor's pleasure.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:13 No.9442431 What if god was one of us?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:14 No.9442451 >>9442431 HERESY

>>	Espagnoll 04/26/10(Mon)13:15 No.9442458 He doesn't feel nothing a part of hear all the time Sammy Haggar's Heavy metal song on his head. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BHt4eFd_2Co

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:16 No.9442483 >>9442451 Just a heretic like one of us?

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:22 No.9442568 No, this is what the inside of the Emperor's head sounds like. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JhSfjAgm1Tk

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:22 No.9442582 >>9442483 TRYING TO MAKE HIS WAY THROUGH THE WAAAARP.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:24 No.9442608 >>9442582 I was thinking "Sitting on the golden throoooone", but whatever.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:24 No.9442609 File1272302681.jpg-(496 KB, 842x1200, 1268201000373.jpg) >>9442568 MY BRAIN IS FULL OF FUCK

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:26 No.9442638 >>9442609 I click on the barbie girl one. JESUS FUCK http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b--I8HEMJYU&feature=fvw

>>	God-Emperor of Mankind 04/26/10(Mon)13:30 No.9442685 Actually, all pictures of me as a corpse re Chaos made. the Golden throne entierly encases my body head to toe preserving me in a manner which you cannont concieve. Just gets boring here so I post on 4chan occasionaly..

>>	Espagnoll 04/26/10(Mon)13:32 No.9442716 >>9442685 You should stop posting on 4chan and start to rebuild it for allow mankind use the Webway and cease to use the Warp as a faster than light way of travel.

>>	God-Emperor of Mankind 04/26/10(Mon)13:33 No.9442725 >>9439470 Mengsk wishes he was HALF the man I was when I was Caesar.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:33 No.9442728 >>9442716 You dare question the will of the Emperor?

>>	God-Emperor of Mankind 04/26/10(Mon)13:35 No.9442749 >>9442716 ... about that..... The instructions were to let me out after 2 thousand years... when I woke back up.... Um did anything major happen while I was gone? because all I get info on is the internet 1997-20035

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:35 No.9442754 "Medamnit when I get out of this chair...."

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:36 No.9442768 >>9442725 who's the half man now, empy? Also which one of those tubes does your shitting for you?

>>	God-Emperor of Mankind 04/26/10(Mon)13:37 No.9442788 >>9442768 the one that goes to your kitchen

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:40 No.9442809 CREEEEEEEEEEED!

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:47 No.9442891 'So sleepy, just ten more minutes snooze...'

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)16:58 No.9446080 File1272315481.jpg-(31 KB, 347x401, custodes.jpg) >>9442348

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)19:56 No.9449688 >>9446080 The only logical explanation.

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)20:05 No.9449856 om nom nom psykers

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:24 No.9451352 >>9441798 /thread

>>	Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:26 No.9451399 Monty Python re-runs.

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