I'd gladly take the title owner of dildo factory if it means i could roll around in millions

I wonder if everyone there finds fulfillment in their jobs.

the question is, who tests the dildos

I knew a kid who dropped out of an esteemed private high school because he had made like a hundred thousand dollars from selling bongs and dildos on the internet.

>>9073973
of dildoes

>>9074002

cash but dildoes are fine too

Having worked in the porno industry I can safely say that no one gives a shit about your work when you are rolling in the moneys.

hey what about the guys who work in the committees to draft designs for new dildos?

what do you think THOSE meetings are like?

"well, bob, i think the tip is still just a liiiiittle too big."

Wait, surely that also means there have to be people who work as Quality Assurance for dildo manufacturers?

Very interesting job title, at least.

>>9073999
Where did he get them in the first place to sell them?

>>9074002
It didn't even come into my mind that she/he was talking about money, I actually thought this was a woman who just wanted to shove millions of dildos down her snatch.

>>9074035
Probably mass-produced in another country or something.

i wanna be a dildo research scientist when i grow up

Even funnier that being the owner of the company is the fact that those companies have shareholders, board meetings, accounts payable, art departments, and engineers all laboring to make sex toys.

Fuck, who invests in a sex toy company?

>>9074063

Shoving dildos up your ass and taking notes all day?

Meh.

Hahaha I love this thread.

This kind of philosophical discussion interests me greatly. This is REAL learning, of the sort one does not find in encyclopaedias or manuals.

Plus I imagine several of the posters ITT have to be really fucking stoned to be sat here putting real thought into how design committees work at a dildo factory.

>>9074044
No, not USE them. Just like, fill a pool with them and roll around on them.

>>9074065
a genius. have you ever shopped for a good one?

THEY ARE EXPENSIVE THAT IS THE POINT

I would imagine that sex toys are pretty-much trend and recession proof.

Well, like any other "appliance," there wouldn't be a factory dedicated to dildoes, they would be produced (most likely) in a plastics/metalwork factory.

In a similar vein, I once tried to work on a RPG maker project called Dildo Quest that involved a dildo factory CEO fighting against a demonic dildo manufacturer from a different dimension whose dildos; once used, would cause the user to turn into a mindless zombie.

Ok, so, the board of directors need to design a new dildo.

Do they have like, a template they work off of? Or do they just start by drawing a penis on the whiteboard and saying "Ok, this is what we have to work with. How do we make this better?"

>>9074072
no watching women masturbate with dildos and... record data

Spoilers:

There are massive factories that produce pretty much anything in plastic and/or rubber. And there would just be a machine that sorts out everything, and then different moulds for it. A dildo shape would be one of them.

As for testing, it'd be up to whoever provides the mould to the factory, e.g. Anne Summers or whoever makes it.

If you were the guy that owned the dildo factory, what would you tell people you do for a living?

>>9074117

There's a designer in an office somewhere, chain smoking and drinking whiskey into the early hours; surrounded by crumpled, discarded papers covered in drawings of cocks.

>>9074117

Dildo's are latex molds of real penises. I remember seeing an episode of Real Sex years ago when I was a teen. They poured latex or some shit over some guys junk, hardened it, then mass produced it. Of course they did minor cosmetic tweakings after.

They also make fake vaginas this way too.

>>9074109

Where do you get metal dildos from 0.o

>>9074153

Why not turn the penis-cast inside out?

>>9074158
metal dildos? what the fuck?

This thread is dildos

mootblox?!

>>9074181


>>9074109
>produced (most likely) in a plastics/metalwork factory.

>>9074172
VIRGINS ITT

avaginaisnotaninvertedpenisblox

>>9074117
>>9074148
I'll never be a great dildo designer... Wait! I could make it... BIGGER!

>>9074153
then where do dragon dildos come from

>>9074237
Obviously it came from a dragon. durrr.

Someone, somewhere in the world, invented this. And he was paid a salary to do it.

Think about that for a minute.

dildos and vibrators are produced much like any other product. it's actually really boring. i know a girl who trys out and suggests new designs. shes a loose whore bdw so she knows her stuff

>>9074237
The 5th circle of hell.

What you don't realize is that most of the dildos factories are in China, so some rich Chinese factory owner is laughing and thinking Haha stupid Americans they buy any plastic shit...

>>9074264
i find that unreasonably hilarious

>>9074237
>My face when I realize that's a 2 Liter bottle, meaning that dildo is as thick as my forearm, and almost as long.

OH GOD WHAT

There are no new designs. Dildos are pretty fucking simple.

It's either:
a) penis-cast, or
b) various sized smooth/ridged/bumpy.

Made of:
c) plastic, or
d) rubber.

With optional extras:
e) clit nub
f) vibrating device, and/or
g) rotating/twirly.

Also, double ended dildos.

There is no more design. You cannot get much better than a simple rod.

>>9074264
>paid a salary to do it.


Doubt it.

DICKS EVERYWHERE

>oh man i'm hilarious

>>9074264
No the inventor was just a fellow sick fuck with a sick idea.

did you know there is a job that pays you to test these things within the same company.

>>9074264

Looks like a one off.

>>9074264
now that's what i call a blowjob

>>9074308
Yes, it is true that all possible permutations of dildo design have been invented and mass produced a thousand times over.

HOWEVER, there are still companies that start manufacturing dildoes, and existing ones that make new dildoes. So somewhere, it's someone's job to like, spin a wheel or something and pick a which features you listed to add to their new product.

>>9074065
bitches and whores OBVIOUSLY
2mostusedphrasesblox

>>9074264
>>9074264

What a fucking Genius

>>9074330
I'm guessing most are tested on animals. Probably dogs or other mammal vaginas. I hear sheep vagina resemble human closely :)

I wonder how many people touched my Aneros prostate massager before it was finally packaged and shipped to me... it's like I've had all of their hands up my ass, prodding my prostate into leaking out pulse after pulse of precum.

>>9074311
i dont. i wouldnt design that for free and ive been payed a shit load of a lot less work

>>9074264
what is this supposed to do?

>>9074332
Oh, if only that were true....

http://www.guystation.co.uk/shop/contents/en-uk/p2302.html

>>9074341

I doubt there are many companies that start off with dildos and do nothing else. It would be a whole brand, that would make a lot of sex toys and objects and gifts. Dildos would be one small part of it.

So they probably just go for a basic rubber dick, and expand (lol) as necessary.

THIS is a dildo.

While I'm here..

Holy fuck, I'm going t o have nightmares for weeks.

>>9074351
are you kidding?! people test them you fool!

>>9074375
FUCK
I'll take twenty.

enjoy
http://www.efukt.com/20590_Suicide_By_Dildo.html

This this. Seriously? Someone, or some people, spent time and energy researching and engineering this thing to tickle the inside of your ass.

There is a company somewhere with a research department trying to improve this design.

Dildos actually grow on trees.

>>9074391

NO
NO NO NO
NAY
NEVER
NO

>>9074446
Huh, that looks like it might be a good replacement for my Aneros.

I bet the complaints they get are hilarious

JOHN YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE QUALITY CONTROL, THIS IS THE FIFTH GODDAMN TIME YOU'VE LET A KNOBLESS DILDO THROUGH.
NEXT TIME IT'S YOUR ASS

dohoho

>>9074415

Hawt. I want to fuck that too.

You know, I think that this thread is dildos.

>>9074387
This.
That's capitalism for you. The same machines that make your toothbrushes and flashlights also make dildos.
It ruined the mom and pop dildo industry.

>>9074505
Your face is dildos.

So is there a dildo factory workers union?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dildo

"Other types of dildos include those designed to be fitted to the face of one party, inflatable dildos..."

"One vessel, of about the 6th century BC, depicts a scene in which a woman bends over to perform oral sex on a man, while another man is about to thrust a dildo into her anus."

"Conventionally, many dildos are shaped like a human penis with varying degrees of detail, others are made to resemble the phallus of male animals"

I lol'd

>>9074529
they fight daily against hard working conditions
8 hours a day is just too much

>>9074482
>next time it's your ass

I lol'd, oh how childish r9k has made me become..

>>9074551
SERIOUSLY
HALF OF THE WIKIPEDIA ARTICLES THAT NEED ONE PHOTO HAVE TO HAVE BITCHFESTS IN THEIR DISCUSSION PAGES ABOUT FAIR USE AND LEGALITY

AND THE FUCKING
--DILDO--
PAGE HAS TEN IMAGES?

I never really thought about the manufacturing side of the sex toy industry before this thread. It's amusing and interesting at the same time.

"The electrically powered vibrator was invented in the 1880s by Kelsey Stinner to treat what was then called "congestion of the genitalia" and "female hysteria". For centuries, doctors had been treating women for these illnesses by performing what we would now recognize as masturbation. However, not only did they regard the "vulvular stimulation" required as having nothing to do with sex, but reportedly found it time-consuming and hard work."


"Then, in 1902, the American company Hamilton Beach patented the first electric vibrator available for retail sale, making the vibrator the fifth domestic appliance to be electrified, after the sewing machine, fan, tea kettle, and toaster, and about a decade before the vacuum cleaner and electric iron."

Wow.

Woops, lost it.

>>9074617
that picture makes me butthurt

>>9074614

...until it was finally perfected.

pic related.

>>9074614
>In the 19th century, the female orgasm had not yet been discovered

haha, oh wow

http://xhamster.com/movies/308153/having_fun_with_a_triple_buttplug.html

>>9074709

Threadkillerblox

>>9074614

Fifth or first, electric vibrators were the major item that pushed household electrification in the early 1900s. Woohoo for female hysteria!

>>9074693
>Since ancient times women considered to be suffering from hysteria would sometimes undergo "pelvic massage" - manual stimulation of the genitals by the doctor until the patient experienced "hysterical paroxysm"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_hysteria

>>9074949

Goddamn our species is fucking stupid and blind.

>>9074237
As furfaggish as that place is they do sometimes inspire some pretty good stuff to be posted.

>>9075034
More likely the people who practiced it knew exactly what they were doing but used psudo-medical claims to do something that would otherwise be illegal or shunned in that time and place. Like medical whiskey during prohibition or medical marijuana when used to treat minor ailments today.

It made me laugh just now. thanks OP

>>9074148
This is why I went to design school

Quality thread on /r9k/? Fuck yeah. Also,

>a day at the dildo factory.jpg
lol'd

>>9075593
That dildo looks like luncheon meat