Fuck off normalfag LULZ

I am a 17 year old virgin with almost no friends, I have goldenhar syndrome, my mom has MS and can't walk, and I suffer from crippling social anxiety.

Help me.

Pretty good, actually. I sent off 17 job applications this morning and got 4 responses back almost immediately. No offers but they've all promised to keep my CV on file/pass it along to the relevant department.

Also I had an extended chat to a guy who is friends with Steven Moffat (BBC showrunner/writer) which was insightful and very fun.

How are YOU, OP?

I'm 26 years old, and from the end of elementary to the end of junior high I was bullied for being a homo.
This made me question wheter or not I was a homo, and so I would gradually test myself more and more to see what I was turned on to. So I exposed myself to every avaiable porn I could find.

Now, my dick doesn't work, and I'm terribly afraid/have no clue what to do to find sexual partners. I mean, I find no one attractive, and If I just pick up a girl, I have the most horribly disgusting dick I've seen + plus, what If I really am gay. All of this is turning my head in. What do?

I broke up with my gf a month ago and I've been doing good, partying and getting drunk pretty much all the time, scoring with random chicks and shit.

Lately I've started feeling like shit though, I don't call any of these girls back or act like an asshole with them and I don't know, I don't like the way I behave.

That's it. I guess I should just move on already, something like that. Thank you for listening brobot.

>>8171723
1) Get your mother legal weed for her MS
2) Smoke said weed
3) become happy for a while
4)????
5) HAPPINESS

normalfag here. you're wasting your time. help people that are willing to help themselves

I'm too nervous to talk to people I don't know.


so I won't be posting here. Sorry.

>>8171712
There's always one?

>>8171723
>I am a 17 year old virgin
17 isn't that old. Wait until you get to college to take your shot at hooking up.

>...with almost no friends
This is what you should focus on. Make one or two good friends you'll keep in contact with, whether you're going to college or off to the working world.

>I have goldenhar syndrome, my mom has MS and can't walk
I'm sorry, bro. It's understandable to be a little socially anxious when you're unsure what others think of you, and to be a little frustrated with the family health concerns.

Try and spend a little bit of time getting to know one or two people well. That's usually less intimidating than setting yourself as the life of the party, and you're less likely to come off as a douche. Think of looking odd as your asshole test. If potential friends judge you on a congenital defect you can't control, all the easier to pass them over; they weren't going to be good friends. Good luck, you'll be fine.

>>8171696
OP you could not have come at a better time. I have a pretty common problem, and if you think its bullshit, it at least won't eat your time up.

Long story short, girlfriend of 9 months cheated on me recently and I broke up with her. I don't regret my decision, but I was absolutely devastated. I have never been good with meeting people cold (ex was my best friend for years) and realize that I'll soon be looking for a girl, if only just to get laid.

2 pt question:
How do I fix my confidence so that I'm not a slobbering mess when I try to meet someone?

How do I meet someone in general? I always felt creepy just approaching someone and blatantly hitting on them. It just strikes me as really disingenuous and game-y.

Pretty attractive guy, have had some success with women, just need to get my game back. Help?

>>8171768
People send us weed in the mail sometime..no joke.
I don't know what they do with it but they sure as hell are not sharing >:(

I fuck up, all the time.
I look okay, I am social and so on, i go too school, I get along with my family.
But I tend to fuck everything up anyway. I don't attend school. Not because it's too hard or I don't fir in, but just because I can't be bothered.
I 'play' with guys. Getting them interested, fooling around, and then reject them without any explanation as soon as they start showing feelings.
I cancel on my friends, often. About an hour or so before we were supposed to meet up.
I some times sit in my room for hours, crying without any fucking reason.
I never contact my friends, they contact me. It doesn't bother me if I don't talk to my best friend for weeks (luckily it doesn't bother her either)
I get pissed at people I care about easily, and I don't know how to apologize.

What the fuck is wrong with me?
I seriously try to be normal, it just wont work.

>>8171782

You are just a typical female.

Nothing to be worried about.

Im doing really good in life. Im an 18 year old who's on a gap year between college and university.

I got into a really good university, too.

But, all my friends left me back in September. The main person in my life left me for someone else. And I feel so alone sometimes.

I have friends at work, and they'd hang out with me outside of it too. Im just not motivated to do so, because Im worried they'll leave me too.

So my question is - How easy is it to make friends at university?

My dad fucked up my head when I was little, parents are divorced needless to say.
he saw a lot of himself in me, so he was extra hard on me and accused me of motives I didn't have projected his life onto me from a young age and saw me as largely evil. when I go home now, it ruins any self confidence/self esteem I've managed to construct and it takes a lot of work to screw my head back on right.
I had ADHD that went undiagnosed until I was 16 because my parents are stubborn. my dad refuses to even believe I have it and tries to argue with me about it and tell me I probably don't really have it. my mom didn't want to believe it at first, even though my teacher in grade one recommended that I go get checked for it, I was, showed classic signs, mom never took me back (she lies about it, but she willingly admits she doesn't believe in medicating kids so young). I see where she's coming from, but fuck, I have NO CONFIDENCE when it comes to school as a result. te medication also is making me socially retarded (I've been taking dexadrine since I was 16 or 17 and it leaves my personality intact I've tried others and they don't work so well for me, they make me feel kind of holow and soulless) I think the medication makes me socially inept because it stops me from being impulsive and I over think how people will react to me. it has taken away my ability to do something without thinking. I am obsessed with doing everything correctly and building solid bases, and can't be happy just to learn enough in a course to pass, I have to do it in a way that lets me retain everything I learn in detail (this is probably stemming from dad's constant criticism. my mom figures I try to be perfect so no one has any right to criticize me) it is fucking my life sideways, I am immobilized. what the fuck do I do? mom wants me to see a counselor but half the time I feel fine and I'm moving soon. I want to go but it's a bad time

>>8171794
I have discussed this with my fellow female friends, and no, it's not normal.
e.g. the thing about guys:
It's not 'on purpose'.
In the beginning it's just physical attraction, then I get intrigued by their personality, but as soon as they express any feelings towards me, I run away as fast as I can.
I cannot look at them anymore, I get uncomfortable when being around them, I get overly suspicious about every single thing they say.
Those of my female friends that I have talked to does not seem to think that this is normal.

>>8171696
I'm a mostly anti-social recluse who is socially disconnected from mainstream society and is still dealing with problems lingering from the period of bullying I suffered from the 7th-9th grade.

I've just came back from college classes at the University of Maryland for the day. Right now I'm struggling with my coursework, but there hope at the end of the tunnel to get some decent grades.

But there are several problems, I have a backlog of things to do, my dorm room is always a mess because I hate organization and every time I clean my room I had to quickly find something that my family members need and gets messed up again.

As for me personally, I'm a bit of a anti-social recluse due to a extended period of bullying I have gone through for three years between 7th and 9th grades. As a result, except for university events, anime conventions, and trips to the nearby cities of DC and Silver Spring I don't have much of a social life.

I do have friends, but they never contact me and I have little in common with them because I'm not into the mainstream crap they enjoy (read: clubbing, drinking booze, sports, prime-time tv). As a result most of the time I'm in front of my laptop doing my studies, watching tv or anime,playing video games ,and surfing 4chan/the internet.

Horribly, horribly fucking depressed and I don't know why anymore.

If I get happy, it just means I'm going to crash even harder later. I wake up feeling like shit and I don't even want to get out of bed since there is no point, if I have somewhere to go during the day I look into various possibilities of skipping it (cut class, don't cut work...yet) and the things that usually make me feel good don't anymore.

I used to WANT to go to sleep so I could dream and maybe find peace or happiness, but all my dreams are horribly fucked up nightmares now.

wat do

full of sloth & hatred no other real characteristics

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>>8171724
>I sent off 17 job applications this morning and got 4 responses back almost immediately.
Good stuff. Share some of that motivation with the rest of /r9k/ :).

I'd doing pretty well, thanks. Heating soup on the stove, waiting for my other half to come home, enjoying /r9k/. Life is good.

>I'm 26 years old, and from the end of elementary to the end of junior high I was bullied for being a homo.
It kind of sucks, but everyone at this age gets made fun of for being a homo. And if it isn't that, it's something else. What sucks more is that it stuck with you. Childhood stuff has a way of doing that.

>This made me question wheter or not I was a homo
Figure this out before you date or watch (more) exotic porn. If you're not sure if you're straight or gay, the answer isn't sleeping with a guy; even if you find out you're straight, you gave yourself a new problem to deal with. It sounds touchy-feely, but ask yourself honestly who you are. Allow for the possibility that you could be gay, and that there's nothing wrong with that. Don't act until you figure out that question first. It won't be good for you, and it won't be fair to the people you involve yourself with.

>I have the most horribly disgusting dick I've seen
I highly doubt it. Try Google. Your dick is probably average, and not an issue with potential partners. Check with a clinic if you're ish actually has issues (STDs, etc.).

Lastly, don't get too worked up about this. Relax, it'll happen. Until then, work on something productive and get your mind off stuff. Your dick will work itself out once you get onto who you're attracted to. It not working now is a clue to stop using it for the time being :). Good luck.

>>8171782
Holy shit, sounds just like me except for the crying. Only movies like Synedoche, New York seem to get the bitch tears out of me.

>>8171782
it's called Asperger's syndrome. They have pills for that these days.

>>8171909
I think the crying is mostly because I don't feel comfortable 'sharing my feelings' and the everything just suddenly seems overwhelming and then I turn into a complete faggot.

I don't talk about the bad shit in my life, I feel like
a complaining faggot when i do.

So I'm feeling alright OP.

Normally completely miserable OR crazy, well, over the last 30 minutes the best mood I've had for quite a while has come on and I'm making the most of it :D

>>8171901

I should mention, mental illness runs in my family. Most of my dads side of the family killed themselves and my moms side includes schizophrenia, dementia, alcoholism, and all kinds of other shit.

Pills have never helped me, Therapy keeps me a little bit stable but thats only an hour a week. I get the feeling I'm just fucked in the head no matter what I do.

Alright here's me:

I'm almost 22, male and five foot eight. I have a rare medical disorder that affects my muscles. I'm not in a wheelchair or anything, however, 20-25 pounds is a lot for me to lift. I am 'alternative' because I cannot relate to 'normalfag' things, particularly sports because I could not play them as a child, and I would just be mediocre at them now.

I have turned to arrogance and pretention to help me deal with the fact that people do not like me as a whole, mostly because I'm just being myself and expressing my individuality. I'd like to think I'm a good 20 IQ points above most of my peer group, though I have not ever been tested in a traditional IQ test format.

My favourite music includes gothic rock, EBM (not the guy with the beard, the genre of music), industrial, and a little bit of metal (which I am getting out of). I dress casual gothically, though I'm always looking for things to expand my wardrobe to intensify my 'look'.

I adore the 18th century clothing style, but I also enjoy *some* aspects of the more rivithead and cybergothic clothing as well.

I enjoy vampire novels and movies, plus I adore listening to Nox Arcana whilst having a stiff drink in the dark.

I am not trolling. I am authentically real.

>>8171913
I honestly don't think I have aspergers syndrome.

>>8171965
Stop being an arrogant douchebag.

Al of your problems will be solved.

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>Lately I've started feeling like shit though, I don't call any of these girls back or act like an asshole with them and I don't know, I don't like the way I behave.
Yeah, breakups have a way of making us bitter and changing how we act with the opposite sex. The good news is that it usually doesn't last long. If you feel bad that you were screwing with people, it's a good sign. Try and fix what's broken, and forgive yourself for a momentary lapse in judgement. We're all allowed to make mistakes, and we all tread a bit on others' hearts whether we're trying to or not. If there are too many girls and issues right now, that's fine. Pick one, and make it right. Maybe next week, pick another, and make it right. You seem like an alright guy, so I think it'll work out for you. Besides, all else fails, "I'm sorry" works wonders with women since men for most of their lives are conditioned to lay off that. Good luck :).

>I guess I should just move on already, something like that.
If this is why you're acting out, it's good you've recognized why, had that level of self-awareness. Allow yourself time to get over it, hang with your bros, etc. Try not to get involved with others when you're still working through it.

>>8171768
A little weed doesn't hurt, but I think the bro needs more than that.

>>8171774
Meh, I don't know if my advice helps, but if it helps one person it's worth it.

What a fucking boring pile of shit thread. Fuck off with your "peer counseling" and horrible advice back to /b/ and stop mucking up /r9k/. Worst garbage I've read in a long time, even worse than Mirrored.

Why do I feel so lonely, yet I have no interest in the people I ever meet?

No, I'm not a 'every1 is so dumb'-person. I meet a lot of friendly people at work, and I actually enjoy talking to them a lot, but I'd never want to meet them outside work or on a personal level.

>>8171972

The thing is though, all the things I like and am into are just the few things that do not either bore me or I cannot do due to my disability.

My *recent* attitude of pretention and arrogance is just my way of dealing with the fact that I am/was outcasted from an early age and everyone who has had few encounters with the disabled, even ones who are only affected on a minor scale- would not understand because it is almost like I and they are separate, different organisms entirely.

I don't fucking care anymore- I've given up dating and I wouldn't mind if my friends left me because I'm too pretentious.

People have walked away from me for just being myself. It's my turn to walk away from them.

I don't mind working- I have to eat, and I'd love to be able to power my internet and electric appliances and things of that nature. I am hyper-realistic about my situation and the generalities of my life. I am embracing the freedom that I have, while I have it.

I'm a 23 yo female, working as a secretary at a large medical university (PLFSOM for whoever cares).

I live by myself in my own apartment ever since I was kicked out of my house a year and a half ago.

Lately, my depression has skyrocketed to the point where it's affected my work to such a degree that my bosses had "a talk" with me. I've tried some psychologists in the past and I've seen the school counselor every day of my life since kindergarden but it doesn't seem as if any of this has helped. I started taking Sertraline (zoloft) about 8 months ago and things were ok until about a month ago when they were no longer taking any effect. I know I need to schedule another appointment with the doctor, but I'm afraid that these new pills will wear off just like these ones did. I've recently called the suicide help hotline and I've been a chronic depressive since 5th grade.I see no point in anything, I don't have any hobbies that would allow for "making friends" nor did I have time since I was working 8-5 and i was in classes all night, sometimes till 10. I'm not pretty (despite what a lot of people say, not being proud, just stating facts), but i don't want people to talk to me or be interested in me just because of my make-up. I stopped going to college as soon as I got my associate's but I don't know what to do in school either.

a lot of times, I just want to cry and lay down and die. But even that doesn't seem worth it.

>>8172056
Also, I have taken to smoking weed more so lately than usual, particularly on bad days. It makes all the mental pain go away and I'm good to go until the next day.

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>>8171775
>I'm too nervous to talk to people I don't know.
Sometimes it can actually be easier. Let me know if you change your mind.

>>8171778
>Long story short, girlfriend of 9 months cheated on me recently and I broke up with her.
I'm sorry, that's really rough.

>ex was my best friend for years
...and this is what makes it worse.

>How do I fix my confidence so that I'm not a slobbering mess when I try to meet someone?
Go out somewhere you'd meet a woman you'd want to date. If it's only to hook up, a bar or club would be fine. Not where I'd go to date a quality partner, but meh, you're just looking for quality ass. Dating and confidence is a skill just like any other. Instead of learning car repair, or whatever, you're learning how to hit on women. Keep asking, learn and pick yourself up when you fail, and do it over and over. My friend who scores the most isn't the best looking, only the most experienced at dating. Just a skill. Be willing to get a bit dirty, tell yourself to do one thing that scares you each day, have this be it.

>How do I meet someone in general? I always felt creepy just approaching someone and blatantly hitting on them. It just strikes me as really disingenuous and game-y.
Nah, make a joke out of it. Getting a girl to laugh is a quick path to getting in her pants. Hit on her my joking about hitting on her, even. Sounds wack, but I've seen friends do it, and it works.

>Pretty attractive guy, have had some success with women...
This helps. It's easier to relearn than learn from scratch. And being hot never hurt.

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>>8171782
>I fuck up, all the time.
Sometimes when we're upset we make the worst of things. Correct the thought; sometimes you mess stuff up, sometimes you get it just right. Be honest with yourself. Berating yourself isn't being honest.

>I look okay, I am social and so on, i go too school, I get along with my family.
Good times.

>I don't attend school. Not because it's too hard or I don't fir in, but just because I can't be bothered.
You don't have to go to school. Set goals for yourself, what you want to do. Try and make small steps daily. Don't look at the mountain and refuse to try. Break it down into smaller accomplishments you can built confidence from.

>I 'play' with guys... I cancel on my friends, often... I some times sit in my room for hours, crying without any fucking reason.
It sounds like you feel depressed, if I'm hearing you right. It'd be a good idea to try and talk with someone professionally. You have a right to feel better, and live a happier life. Take care of yourself. Try not to get involved right now, too.

>>8171794
>You are just a typical female.
Meh, no such thing.

Didn't I tell you to take this shit back to /b/?

Block.
>>8171845
>I feel so alone sometimes.
People change quite a bit when they go to college. You're not alone, but it's understandable that you'd feel that way.
>I have friends at work... Im worried they'll leave me too.
You've been burned, but don't let it stop you from branching out and giving others a try. They may end up being pretty cool, you'll have to take that chance. On the off chance they suck, who cares? You're gone in a year, screw 'em. Much to gain, little to lose :). Focus on future possibilities more than past hurts.
>So my question is - How easy is it to make friends at university?
Oh boy, you'll be fine. Trust me, you'll really be fine. Live on campus, pray for a good roommate, take 12 units your first semester, and join one club. From there you'll work it out, but friends will be your last problem :).

>>8171861
>My dad fucked up my head when I was little... when I go home now, it ruins any self confidence/self esteem I've managed to construct and it takes a lot of work to screw my head back on right.
This is the part that counts the most. Part of becoming adults is setting up boundaries, and good old dad sounds like he's a ripe candidate. You can still love and forgive a person (if you choose-- and you should) and limit your interaction. Decide how much interaction is healthy for you, and communicate this with your father. Hold your ground, too. You're not a child now, and you have a right to your own self-esteem. And remember this when you're a parent, too :).
>I am immobilized. what the fuck do I do? mom wants me to see a counselor but half the time I feel fine and I'm moving soon.
Moving from this house sounds like a good thing, jump all over that. Living on your own is fun, too. Counseling sounds like a pretty good bet. Low cost counseling is available in the US at your county mental health department. Best of luck :)

feel pretty good, I completed all of my work for one of my classes early, sans my final paper, so I feel a huge weight lifted from my shoulders.

I'm trying to decide on a speech topic though. I think I'm going to go with sleep (informative style)

It was that or depression, and depression is depressing.

Hi normalfag. Today, I failed to get into a single college in California (where my boyfriend and all my friends are) despite slaving my ass off for my entire high school career. As a result of this, my boyfriend and I are going to break up, after months of planning to finally be close to each other. I will be alone and I have no prospects. I will probably be dead within a few days, but I just wanted someone to know that this is the worst day of my life. Thanks for listening.

I went out drinking today with a girl I have a crush on (who is sadly in a serious long relationship), another girl and a good friend of mine. I fucking hate myself for being an introvert. I was probably the most quiet person out of us 4. I am damn well aware of that. I feel like I'm a third wheel because I don't speak as much as them. Feels bad man. I wish I was an extravert.

But hey, what do you know, there's a little bit of happiness in the corner of this bottle of alcohol. Yes, I'm drinking more alone at home now after I got back.

/r/ing full-sized version of OP's pic

Blocks
>>8171873
>I have discussed this with my fellow female friends, and no, it's not normal.
Whether it's normal or not, it's probably not healthy and constructive :).

>>8171886
>I'm a mostly anti-social recluse who is socially disconnected from mainstream society and is still dealing with problems lingering from the period of bullying I suffered from the 7th-9th grade.
Good synopsis, having read your post. Childhood stuff tends to stick with us for a long time. It's not as easy as just letting go, but place more emphasis on the future and what can be done. Like hanging out with your friends (below).

>I have a backlog of things to do, my dorm room is always a mess because I hate organization and every time I clean my room I had to quickly find something that my family members need and gets messed up again.
There's a lot here, but here are two ideas from what you've said. Sometimes cleaning up or finishing one assignment builds momentum. And it'll be easier to find stuff for family when the room is super clean, so good times. It's easy to feel overwhelmed when your plate is full with so much. Sometimes it's enough to fix one or two things to restore the balance.

>except for university events, anime conventions, and trips to the nearby cities of DC and Silver Spring I don't have much of a social life.
That's a good start, really. Try broadening your interests a little bit, with something you find interesting that your friends can more relate with. Just some intersection there in that venn diagram of what you and your friends like. Keep doing what you enjoy, too. You've had a hard time in the past, but keep giving your friends a shot if you feel they're trustworthy.

>>8172071
thanks brosef. Pretty solid.

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>>8171901
>Horribly, horribly fucking depressed and I don't know why anymore.
Yeah, good self-analysis. You sound depressed. The good news is that you don't have to be. Call up a counselor and see about getting an appointment. It's not as scary as it sounds, and you'll feel amazingly lighter walking out of that room after you get it off your chest. Until then, keep in contact with your good friends, avoid the negative thoughts and triggers, and spend time on you. Have a favorite hobby? Hit it up. Don't allow yourself to sit inside in the dark with a bottle of Jack. Will not help.

>I look into various possibilities of skipping it (cut class, don't cut work...yet) and the things that usually make me feel good don't anymore. I used to WANT to go to sleep so I could dream and maybe find peace or happiness, but all my dreams are horribly fucked up nightmares now.
These are pretty classic signs. Please get help for your sake. You deserve to be happy. The good news is you're smarter than most people who're depressed. Best wishes :).

>>8171903
>full of sloth & hatred no other real characteristics
Wow, oldfag much? There's something redeeming about all of us. Find and cherish that. Build it into something more. Hate and sloth never built anything. Try something new.

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>>8171909
>Holy shit, sounds just like me except for the crying.
Yeah, that's not good. Same advice :).

>>8171913
>it's called Asperger's syndrome. They have pills for that these days.
It's hard to diagnose over the interwebs, but there's some pretty fundamental stuff going on that needs work. It's more germane to our psyche than "how to talk my g/f into a threesome" or whatever.

>>8171939
>I think the crying is mostly because I don't feel comfortable 'sharing my feelings' and the everything just suddenly seems overwhelming and then I turn into a complete faggot.
I think part of your post has to do with trust issues, tbh. I didn't read aspie off it, but getting professional help would be great for you, I think.

>>8171955
>I don't talk about the bad shit in my life, I feel like
a complaining faggot when i do. So I'm feeling alright OP.
Sometimes it's healthy to talk about how you feel, just vent a little. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad, such is life. I'm glad you're doing well. Here's to a good evening, cheers.

>>8171958
>Normally completely miserable OR crazy
You're a woman, right? Kidding. Glad you're feeling well now, definitely make the most of it. Feel free to post more if you'd like me to write more.

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>>8171961
>I should mention, mental illness runs in my family.
Well, depression and many of the disorders you listed have a genetic component, so that doesn't help.

>Pills have never helped me, Therapy keeps me a little bit stable but thats only an hour a week. I get the feeling I'm just fucked in the head no matter what I do.
This is where I recommend partial hospitalization and you don't listen. You probably need more consistent care to stay in a stable state. I'm worried now about suicide and so forth. Please talk with someone and open up about this with your counselor. I hope you feel better :).

>>8171965
I have a rare medical disorder that affects my muscles. I'm not in a wheelchair or anything, however, 20-25 pounds is a lot for me to lift.
Sorry about that. I'd imagine that's made things challenging for you.

>I have turned to arrogance and pretention to help me deal with the fact that people do not like me as a whole, mostly because I'm just being myself and expressing my individuality.
Good times. Really, we all create ourselves to some degree, and it's no less authentic, simply how we express ourselves. Sounds like you've found something that works for you. Kudos.

>>8171979
>What a fucking boring pile of shit thread.
Would you like to talk about it :).

>>8172708

While I don't intend to rule out such a thing, I don't see how hospitalization or more direct supervision will help. If I go to a mental hospital, I will miss out on schoolwork and possibly lose my job. I can only stand being around people so much as it is, so idk how well that would work out.

Suicide is actually a very fascinating topic for me, I've been reading up about it lately. Actually makes me feel better. I have no intention of killing myself, as I do feel like my FUTURE is bright, I just don't know how to get through this rough patch as its never been this rough.

However, THANKS YOU COULD HELP BRO

I have more girl friends than boy friends.
All of my girl friends tell me I'm charming and funny.
One of my boy friends tell me I'm one hell of a charismatic guy.

Yet I can't see that.
Oh, yeah. kissless virgin and all that. Wouldn't be posting here if I were not, right?
I'm not unhappy or anything, it's just like... oh hell if I know what I'm doing here.

>>8172442
Dogfish drank, I'll try your advice. Thanks for your help.

>>8172056
You need holidays in some remote place on the opposite side of the world, possibly alone or with people you don't know (socialization is not important though). Sometimes that will help you a bit back in the everyday life, or at least it did for me. I'm doing it again this summer.

>>8172184
Jesus Christ, dude, what the fuck do you care? Is r9k really that important to you? Get a damn life.

Hopefully you can help me...

So me and my girlfriend are 18 months and going strong, but too me there is one kink in the relationship; our sex life is rare and sparse. Last time we had sex was December and we have done other sexual acts since then, but we don't do those things that often anymore. Now we're both 18 and finishing up highschool and she's having a tough time deciding on what school to go to. She can either go to a small school that is about an hour and a half away from where I will be going and will be able to play soccer, or she can come to VTech with me. She switches back and forth between schools constantly and I know it's hard for her. If you haven't discovered this yet, she gets stressed out easily and I'm sure that part of her nature is worrying about SOMETHING, ANYTHING. When she gets stressed out, she can get angry pretty easily, and I usually snap her out of it. I on the other hand am care free and take things as the come. Even though it's getting to be the end of the year, she still stresses about school work whereas I say fuck it. Ughhh, I just want her to be happy and for our sex life to be where it should. For Christmas I got her some sexy lace panties and a vibrator (as a joke.. kind of) and she loved them, but she has yet to use them. She says she's just not a sexual demon, whereas I may be that sexual demon. I do ALOT for her, like ALOT. Sometimes I feel like I love her alot more than she does, and I feel like she doesn't appreciate or notice my affection for her. Maybe I'm putting the pussy on the pedestal? Should I just back off? I love this girl to death and I just want us to be infinitely satisfied and happy with each other.

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>>8172056
>Lately, my depression has skyrocketed to the point where it's affected my work to such a degree that my bosses had "a talk" with me.
Okay, so this is impacting your work and day-to-day life. I can understand why that'd concern you. I'm a little worried, too. Previous counselors haven't worked, but I'd continue seeing someone given the circumstances. If nothing else it provides you with some protection if you're fired over mental instability; you were actively seeking help.

>I started taking Sertraline (zoloft) about 8 months ago and things were ok until about a month ago when they were no longer taking any effect.
This is pretty common. Sometimes the dosage needs to be increased, or a new SSRI is prescribed. You already said it, lol, call your doc. If they do wear off, keep working on it. Medicine is experimental; nothing is guaranteed to work. But, there are dozens of SSRIs, so options exist.

It sounds generally like you've lost hope about quite a bit, which really points in the same direction (above).

>>8172068
>Also, I have taken to smoking weed more so lately than usual, particularly on bad days. It makes all the mental pain go away and I'm good to go until the next day.
A little weed doesn't hurt, but you're self-medicating. Use it in the interim, hell of a lot better than wanting to kill yourself, but call your psychiatrist.

So there's a guy I'm ridiculously into in my English class. He's highly intelligent and maybe just a bit pretentious. We barely qualify as acquaintances. We've talked a few times online (long times between replies but I feel like he just does that when he talks online) and exchanged awkward-ass smiles on a few occasions. I want very much to ask him to coffee or the like. He has many friends, male and female, and all his good friends are male. He's never had a relationship. He's a little funny looking, but also a little handsome; it's fifty-fifty. Pretty nerdy, browses 4chan, only kid in class that takes notes on a laptop. Wears sweatpants. I'm fairly attractive, fairly intelligent, and soul-crushingly shy when it comes to him for some reason. How do I get me some of that?

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend whom I lived with for over a year and who broke up with me less than 3 months ago is now engaged. I've already handled this break-up very poorly in how I acted towards her and how I reacted internally, I've even considered speaking to a therapist about it.

Basically, I had surrounded myself with all things her, and she did the same. We were practically inseparable and all of our friends were mutual friends. Yet, despite how close we were, I began to get bored and complacent. I had convinced myself that since I had gotten such an amazing girl so easily, then surely there's one better out there that I could eventually settle down with. Needless to say, I'm an idiot. I stopped showing her the affection and romance that I did at the beginning of our relationship, and she started realizing that she was more into it than I was. When she tried to speak to me about it, I didn't take her seriously. Hence, the breakup.

Since the breakup, all of said mutual friends have ceased speaking to me leaving me with no one to talk to aside from my family, who have a hard time understanding the situation. I have had sex with plenty of girls since then but each time ends in failure and my realizing that I'd much rather be back with her. I had gathered far too many eggs in the "we with both grow up some, and eventually meet up again and make it work for good" basket. Now I do not know what to do with myself. I could use some counselling, and the free kind is definitely welcome.

>>8171696
I'm going to a top 10 school next fall and I wanna get involved in Washington D.C. Whats your experience in working in politics. Is it fun? Is it challenging?

There was this girl I knew in high school. We got REALLY close, and were dating and after a long while of talking and going places together i made a move on ehr at homecoming. All was well for a little while, until out of the blue she says we can't hang out anymore and i find out she has a boyfriend. The next day she calls me and talks about how she made a bad choice and how she hates him and after a week of dating she breaks up with him.
However I was wary of her and wouldn't let her get to close because i was afraid of getting hurt. So we turned into "just friends." It was like that for awhile and then she wrote and played me a song on the guitar and baked me a cake asking me to go to prom with her, it kind of overwhelmed me and I let my guard down and then everything was cool and we started getting intimate. But three days before prom comes around she starts ignoring me and I don't see her at all. Then the day before prom i find out she's going with some other dude.
That broke whatever i had left of a heart for her. I didn't talk to her for the rest of the year and went off to college. Every now and then she would send me a text but for the most part i ignored her. I went back and saw her once for a weekend but that was it.
Then I dropped out.
Flash forward one year... we're living in the same area. She found me on facebook. She seems interested in me, but there are other guys trying to date her. She's blowing a lot of them off for me, I've only seen her twice so far.
It REALLY hurts just thinking about her because it brings up a lot of old memories of heartbreak. I still REALLY like this girl but have no clue how she feels about me. My heart tells me to go for it and make a move on her. But my head tells me never to talk to her again and to TRY to forget about her...
what do?
how can i get rid of this pain?
what could she think about this whole situation?

help me?

I have social anxiety and most social interaction that I do feels fake, empty formalities, and when I am talking with someone I feel I can open up to I barely do..
Instead of mostly agreeing with their opinions on things, I give my own, I still don't really share who I am
I feel isolated almost
Most my friends come and go, I assume if they don't initiate contact with me they wouldn't want me to..
I only have two friends I've been friends with for longer than a year

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>>8172352
>feel pretty good, I completed all of my work for one of my classes early, sans my final paper, so I feel a huge weight lifted from my shoulders.
Good times.

>It was that or depression, and depression is depressing.
True that. I remember in a writing class we were only allowed to write about depressing topics because those had better tension. Wrote about break ups and all kinds of sad crap, sucked. Sleep sounds better.

>>8172389
>Hi normalfag. Today, I failed to get into a single college in California (where my boyfriend and all my friends are) despite slaving my ass off for my entire high school career.
CA has the best community colleges in the nation, most of which have guaranteed transfer programs after your second year into the UC system, which is the best public education system in the country. It's also the cheapest place to do CC in the country, too, ironically. Try that before suicide.

>I will probably be dead within a few days, but I just wanted someone to know that this is the worst day of my life. Thanks for listening.
Don't build your life around a guy, they come and go, build your life around you. You have merit, and there's no need to kill yourself.

I remember getting rejected to colleges (undergrad, transferring, and grad school) and I feel your pain. It's understandable that you feel so frustrated now. But give yourself a little time to process it and find a safe and fun way to vent some steam. Please talk with your friends, too. Take care of yourself, please :).

LOLDONGS11212

So, I'm sort of in the closet at the moment. I've told some online friends, and while most of them seem okay with it, I haven't had quite as much luck IRL. I told one person who I had been best friends with for seven years - he suddenly started acted really cold/standoffish, and stopped talking to me, even though he initially said it wasn't a big deal.

I know the generic advice is that if people don't accept you for who you are, they aren't worth considering friends, but there has to be more I can do. My sexuality really isn't a big part of my life at all, and I don't want to lose friends because of it, or have people make assumptions based on the negative social stigma. Any advice, normalfag?

(I'm 18, female, and a senior in HS, if it makes any difference.)

>>8173145
The boy wanted to fuck you.

>>8172889
It sounds dumb, but thanks for the advice. sometimes it really helps to have someone to talk to without all the strings attached (i.e. they know you, or they see you everyday so they start treating you differently)

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>>8172427
>I feel like I'm a third wheel because I don't speak as much as them. Feels bad man. I wish I was an extravert.
It's not how much you talk, but what you say. One of our suitemates in college was a quiet guy, but we always brought him with us because whenever he did say something, it was funny as hell or thoughtful enough for a toast. So long as you keep going out, you're fine. They're inviting you along for a reason. Focus on what you say rather than just saying stuff without purpose. Sounds like you're doing fine, really.

>But hey, what do you know, there's a little bit of happiness in the corner of this bottle of alcohol. Yes, I'm drinking more alone at home now after I got back.
Once in awhile, no big deal. Just don't get bogged down in that. Take care of yourself.

>>8172474
Cheers :).

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>>8172770
>While I don't intend to rule out such a thing, I don't see how hospitalization or more direct supervision will help.
It gets in the way of life, I'll admit, but so does suicide. It's not intended as a permanent thing. It's to get you more stable for the time being, and to provide strategies to carry that stability forward when you've living on your own 24/7. Being around people may be healthy for you, too.

>Suicide is actually a very fascinating topic for me, I've been reading up about it lately. Actually makes me feel better. I have no intention of killing myself, as I do feel like my FUTURE is bright, I just don't know how to get through this rough patch as its never been this rough.
These are warning signs we're supposed to look for. Stop reading about killing yourself. It's not healthy, bro.

My life sucked when I was under the roof with my abusive father and then when I was homeless, but I always knew it'd get better. It did. Well better than I'd have ever guessed. If you'd told me I'd drive a $70k car and get a top flight education I'd have laughed my ass off. But, it works; when you're depressing things look dull. Reality is better than what you're making of it now, and so too will your future be. Hang in there, whether you get the help or not. Best wishes :).

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>>8172779
>I have more girl friends than boy friends.
I rate this as a net positive. Same here, too.

>I'm charming... Yet I can't see that
This falls under fake it until you make it. Pretend you're awesome and you and most people will believe you. Hell, they already believe it, you only need to worry about tricking yourself, the work is half over. The first couple times are the hardest, but go out with your coolface.jpg and play it up. Then report back.

>>8172802
Cheers, good luck!

>>8173182

Not reading about killing myself, more about the history of suicide, suggested causes, trends, shit like that. I write/compose music about it. I have no interest in the suicide shit when I'm far down, only when I'm in a good mood, and it doesn't bring me down in the least.

As for being around people, I'm gonna go hang out with some friends tonight. ROCK ONNN

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>>8172829
>You need holidays in some remote place on the opposite side of the world, possibly alone or with people you don't know (socialization is not important though). Sometimes that will help you a bit back in the everyday life, or at least it did for me. I'm doing it again this summer.
This does help, it's one solution, with you there. A change of scenery might be good.

>>8172834
Pretty much. Thanks, bro.

>>8172873
>So me and my girlfriend are 18 months and going strong, but too me there is one kink in the relationship; our sex life is rare and sparse.
Well, that's pretty precocious; you're getting the experience of marriage at 18. Sex tends to dip off around year two, there's a real need to work on intimacy. Buying her the gifts is good. Even better is that you understand it's related more to the emotional level of things.

>She can either go to a small school that is about an hour and a half away from where I will be going and will be able to play soccer, or she can come to VTech with me.
Be prepared for the possibility that in either case you two may not be together within a year or so.

>Maybe I'm putting the pussy on the pedestal? Should I just back off?
These aren't the problems, but again, it's not really about you. She'll need to take this time and figure out what she wants. The bad news is that all you can really do is express to her how you feel in a real and genuine way. That, and give her time. Look, either way, you've got a good head on your shoulders and you won't be hurting for company. Try and work it out with the girl you love. If it doesn't, you'll still be fine. Hang in there :)

No clue if this is your area of expertise, but I'm concerned about procrastinating and my complete lack of motivation. I have clear and specific goals that I want to accomplish, but lack the energy and motivation to work towards them. I'll start the day thinking, "I'm going to do ____ today and get closer to my goal", but then the thought of doing ____ repulses me, so I'll come visit 4chan or some other website as a distraction and end up never doing ____. Any suggestions on how to make it easier to get off my lazy ass would be appreciated.

Is there a readable version of OP?

>>8173226
whoa, you answered it!
thanks, I'll try to do that.

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>>8172976
>So there's a guy I'm ridiculously into in my English class. He's highly intelligent and maybe just a bit pretentious...
This is such a cute post. Just d'awwww.

Well, that's great background, thanks. There's not much you can do. Ask him straight up and nonchalant if he wants coffee. Talk to him first, see if he's in a good mood. Try not to seem too infatuated. He may say no. It may not sound like it now, but his loss. Besides, he wears sweatpants. Kidding. But, really, the best perspective is that both people are lucky to find each other, and both need to be on the same page for giving the relationship a shot. If that's not what he wants, no bigs, there are other cute guys in other English classes. With sweatpants. Also, great sense of humor, don't lose that.

>>8171696

Hi OP. I just want to say my life is awesome, despite being a high school drop out.

I managed to secure a job as a lock smith apprentice, but I quit after 6 months. (I know how to pick locks, tee hee)

I quit because I was shipped to bootcamp as a infantry. So I was in the army for a year then I quit.

Now I'm playing poker at the casino (Made $155 in profit sitting around for 3 hours drinking beer and playing cards) and making good passive cash money on the Internet.

I love my life, I think it's awesome.

Not to hijack this thread, but my tip is:

1. Know what you want to do in life, disregard trying to impress your peers, parents or opposite sex.

2. Do what you love everyday

3. Read a book and exercise everyday.

Well I'll ttyl guys later, going to eat a Buddhism book and going for a jog as soon as I finish this tuna sandwich.

I feel like people only talk to me because they want to help me. Because of my social anxiety, I was a huge dbag and was rude to friends in middle and high school.

I'm terrified of my mom, even though I know she has my best interests at heart, and I feel like my dad is a caricature who becomes someone completely different when I'm not around. I'm a college freshman and haven't formed a new relationship in 2-3 years.
I'm male, I shouldn't be having these problems, at least not this late in life.
Wat do?

>>8173335

Thanks for the advice, I was starting to think that I might be "whipped" and too overbearing. The thing is I just love being with her and hanging out.

Everyday I think about the possibility that we may not be together forever and that scares the living shit out of me, because I LOVE HER. I can't ever see me putting this much effort and love and care into anything else. I think about her nonstop. Right now it's springbreak and I'm at Lake Tahoe and she's on a cruise in the Bahamas and for some reason its eating me up even though I trust her 100%. We can't call each other or communicate at all so its really hard for me atleast. I haven't heard her sweet voice in 4 days. I've been taking a daily video clip of me talking to her for only about a minute, but I hope when she eventually is able to check her email she will appreciate it. We also have this journal that we keep whenever we are apart and I was going to give it to her to write in because I feel like she'd have more to tell, but she didn't want it at first. She switched her mind when it was too late so now I have it, and have been writing 3-5 pages in it daily about how the day went and what I'm feeling, etc. pretty personal things. This is what I mean when I say I put ALOT of effort and love into her. Is this too much? I feel like if I lost her I'd either:

a) kill myself
b) immediately drop everything and live in a totally foreign place, maybe moving every few years somewhere else

Hopefully you could give me some form of advice about this, as I'm getting fairly worried.
I'm 18 and in year 13 (last year of Sixth Form). You'd expect me to be trying hard and doing my best in the "last push" so to speak, however I seem to have lost all motivation for the subjects I do (English Literature, Psychology and Photography) and I'm worried that I'm going to get pretty bad grades this year. To be honest I don't expect to get amazing grades anyway (I got BBCD at AS level) but I just need help on keeping focused, dedicated and motivated.
I'm also worried that I don't know what I want to do in the future. My parents want me to go to University, but I don't know what I want to study or if I'll get into a worthwhile one. To be honest I'd be quite happy doing anything in the future if I had an internet connection and a decent computer at home. I just don't have a drive to do anything with my life and it's annoying me.

FYI: I'm going to respond to all posts that come in up to 7:15 p.m. EST, in order. After that I have to spend time with my fiancee, sorry, maybe I'll catch you next time?

>>8172997
>I'm going to a top 10 school next fall and I wanna get involved in Washington D.C. Whats your experience in working in politics. Is it fun? Is it challenging?
I was in state government, and I moved up through the ranks pretty fast. It's both of those adjectives. Just be prepared to work your ass off. There are not just nights, but weeks you won't leave the office, particularly budget. There are cots and showers onsite; you do the math. The work has to come first, but it's wonderfully rewarding, and it's so challenging that if you can hack it you can ascend quickly. Be prepared, too, to have your perceptions of dem/repub shattered pretty fast. Don't burn out. Have fun!

>It REALLY hurts just thinking about her because it brings up a lot of old memories of heartbreak. I still REALLY like this girl but have no clue how she feels about me. My heart tells me to go for it and make a move on her. But my head tells me never to talk to her again and to TRY to forget about her...
In this case, I think your head has got it right. "Fool me once, shame on you..." etc. And it's already happened twice. Pick someone else. She sounds like a royal whore, I'm sorry. There's something you can't say in counseling. Anyway, she's demonstrated that she's untrustworthy. She seems to be treating you as a sort of backup, and it's not fair. And even if you're not the backup this time, don't believe another guy isn't. It'll probably always be musical chairs in and out of her life. And you deserve more than that.

Also, go back to school, trust me.

>>8173607

how do you combat that complacent feeling that happens after a while of being together? I don't want that to happen, ever.

bump for local health and human services worker: Dogfish drank

For the first time in my life I am doing great. I look great, I'm in great shape, I have plans and they are rapidly moving forward. You could say I love life, which most in here would outright claim to be bullshit. All this and so much more I owe to the military. I guess I just want to share the joy I am feeling these days with someone who isn't a bitter asshole incapable of helping himself.

>>8173706

>In this case, I think your head has got it right. "Fool me once, shame on you..." etc. And it's already happened twice. Pick someone else. She sounds like a royal whore, I'm sorry. There's something you can't say in counseling. Anyway, she's demonstrated that she's untrustworthy. She seems to be treating you as a sort of backup, and it's not fair. And even if you're not the backup this time, don't believe another guy isn't. It'll probably always be musical chairs in and out of her life. And you deserve more than that.

Damn... you're fucking right about that musical chairs thing... pretty much described her relationship status. Although she's been single for a while and getting her life back together recently, she pretty much dropped all of her old crowd... but you might be right anyways... I'm sure you've been here before and understand how i feel at least... I'm just gonna go for it and crash and burn and revel in my mistake... I don't want to regret passing her up... I've been dating this whole time she's been out of my life, with one serious relationship and a bunch of other meaningless ones and I never fail to compare them all to her... they all fall short...

>Also, go back to school, trust me.
Yeah I'm doing that... at CC right now, bustin out a 3.4. Transferring out in the fall, I realized how big of a mistake i made when i dropped out... I felt like the biggest fucking idiot to ever walk the earth...

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>>8173049
>I have social anxiety and most social interaction that I do feels fake, empty formalities, and when I am talking with someone I feel I can open up to I barely do..
Instead of mostly agreeing with their opinions on things, I give my own, I still don't really share who I am
Most of this is pretty normal, I think, really. Try to open up a little more to one or two people who you feel you can trust. If you have two close friends, trust me, you're richer than most. Many people have zero, or one. If you have success in greater candor with them, open up with a few more. Think of it as an experiment in opening yourself to others layer by layer. I expect great success. Good luck.

>>8173145
>So, I'm sort of in the closet at the moment. I've told some online friends, and while most of them seem okay with it, I haven't had quite as much luck IRL. I told one person who I had been best friends with for seven years - he suddenly started acted really cold/standoffish, and stopped talking to me, even though he initially said it wasn't a big deal.
The guy below was right, he probably wanted to mess around. Also, don't come out to your parents until you're in college unless you're positive they'll be okay with it.

Give him time. Unless it fundamentally conflicts with his core values, he'll get over it. Some people just take more time than others. Popular knowledge says that some friends go through the cycle of grief, which you can Google if you like. Keep the hand of friendship out there are wait for him to come to terms in his own time. Best of luck.

I make all of my relationships fail because I don't really like myself. I hit them, raped one of them, and verbally abused all of them, so that when they leave I can say, "you didn't care anyways". I don't think I have a reason to change.

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>>8173164
I'm glad. Cheers. Please feel better.

>>8173242
>As for being around people, I'm gonna go hang out with some friends tonight. ROCK ONNN
Good call. Good luck.

>>8173337
>No clue if this is your area of expertise, but I'm concerned about procrastinating and my complete lack of motivation. I have clear and specific goals that I want to accomplish, but lack the energy and motivation to work towards them.
Extreme laziness calls for extreme measures. Look up synoptic planning. Beyond setting a goal, set quantifiable and specific objectives with a set deadline. Reward yourself for meeting the goal: clean room is one hour of 4chan. Don't punish yourself, but refuse yourself the reward until the action is complete. Try that and report back.

>>8173376
Cheers, good luck and report back findings.

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>>8173407
>i'm ugly and want to look like this.
Be realistic about how you look, and how you can look. Most people tend to go to extremes and feel they're better or worse looking than they really are. Which is to say, you're probably not as ugly as you think. Beyond that, there's only so much you can do, and that's what you need to focus on. Get rid of the acne, go to the gym, and generally take care of yourself. If that doesn't work, remember, they're just whores anyway. Kidding. But, really, find people who like your strengths rather than those who fault your weaknesses.

I am terrible at small talk. I just have absolutely nothing to say to random strangers. I'm not socially inept, but I don't have the ability to magically turn a bad conversation into a good one.

Girl at a bar: "So, what do you do?"
Me: "I'm a professional video game developer, and I enjoy running."
Girl: "Oh cool, my brother's into video games."

This is where the conversation grinds to a halt. What am I supposed to say to that? "Oh tell me more about your brother he sounds like such a sweetheart. Does he also like food, or music?"

Usually I just say nothing and look away, and they get mad.

What do?

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>>8173496
>I'm male, I shouldn't be having these problems, at least not this late in life.
Try trusting one or two people in your life. Open up little by little. If all goes well, pick another one or two people. Distrusting others because they want to help doesn't make much sense, probably best to get over that. And although interacting may be difficult for you, try not to be a douche since it tends to exacerbate the anxiety of the douche and unnecessarily harm the innocents. Just go little by little with new people. Good luck :)

>>8173542
>I haven't heard her sweet voice in 4 days. I've been taking a daily video clip of me talking to her for only about a minute, but I hope when she eventually is able to check her email she will appreciate it...
Okay, yes, back off a little. That's coming on a little too strong, even after you're at this stage in the relationship.

Also, don't become so wrapped up in the relationship that your life is built around it, that really isn't healthy. You sound like a good guy, and other women are out there if this fails, and I promise they're a better option than suicide. Be good to her, but keep your life more balanced. Good luck :)

I started reading and just fell asleep in the middle somewhere.

>>8174134
You say "Really, and what do you like?"
or something smooth along those lines

>>8174134
"Well, what about you? Do you enjoy any video games?"
"Oh, not really."
"What do you like, then?"

or

""Well, what about you? Do you enjoy any video games?"
"Yeah, sometimes. I play xxxx and yyyy with friends every once in a while!"

Hurpadurp.

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>>8173543
>I'm 18 and in year 13 (last year of Sixth Form). You'd expect me to be trying hard and doing my best in the "last push" so to speak, however I seem to have lost all motivation
In the states this is called senoritis; the condition whereby in the last year of school the student comes down with a bad case of the "I'm not doing a damn thing" bug. It happens to the best of us.

This is a bigger issue...
>I'm also worried that I don't know what I want to do in the future.
You're not as motivated as you'd wish, ironically. Set yourself goals and measurable objectives similar to the advice here: >>8173990. Reward yourself similarly as well.

Go to uni for the experience if not the ambition. Many go without an idea of what they want to do. Just don't waste money if inspiration doesn't come in the first year; continuing on endlessly in your third year without a major is sad. That said, it's uncommon. The world is a much better place once there. Make that the primary focus and take it one problem at a time. Good luck!

>>8174134

You could try giving them an opening to continue talking... maybe a question about her, her brother, what it was like having an (older/younger) brother in the house, maybe talk about how the sibling relationship changes and becomes awesome once high school is over.

You can ask any sort of question, but if you want to have a good conversation you have to give the other person an opening to talk back to you. If you don't give them any openings than where can the conversation possibly go?

What is she supposed to say after you say:
>Girl at a bar: "So, what do you do?"
>Me: "I'm a professional video game developer, and I enjoy running."
>Girl: "Oh cool, my brother's into video games."

The only possible way for her to continue the conversation would be to ask you something about running or your job.. and TBH, the conversation isn't about you. You are actively trying to learn about her to figure out if you're interested in her... if you don't ask any questions you just come off as cold and uninterested, or self-centered... no one likes those kinds of people... regardless of if that's you or not.

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>>8173716
>how do you combat that complacent feeling that happens after a while of being together? I don't want that to happen, ever.
They've written books on this, it's way beyond this discussion here, but the best antidote is to have made the mistake before. Excluding that... continue doing small, sweet nice things. The one great thing out of the horrible book that is "Men are from Mars..." is that women value the smaller gestures more than men think they will. A single flower is almost as good as a dozen. Or, a single flower given a dozen times is certainly >>8173798
better than a dozen given once. Women, like men, like to feel special. So often on /r9k/ it's "I don't get women" and that becomes all women are whores, etc. Fight the good fight to stay in love. Good luck.

>>8173798
>bump for local health and human services worker: Dogfish drank
Thanks, bro. Cheers.

>>8173802
>For the first time in my life I am doing great.
Glad to hear it. Keep it up, and good work. Cheers.

>>8173916
you skipped me siIIy bastard
=(

Alright, I'm out.

Thanks for the good questions, take care of each other and yourselves.

>>8174319
hahaha, you fucking dilettante.

Seems like a load of bollocks, but I'll bite. I'm feeling much worse today. Everything seems so hopeless. My life isn't shit through misfortune, everything wrong with me is something I can fix. It's my fault I don't have a girlfriend because I don't take the chance, it's my fault I do so badly at college because I don't do the work, it's my fault my social life is lacking because I don't open up. All of these things are under my control and I'm the one who can sort them out. Except I can't because I'm just so lazy. I had all these plans to improve myself, to focus on my college work and to pick up a new language, but it never works out because I am just incredibly lazy.

I get these random moments that make me "GO FUCK YEAH IM GOING TO DO SHIT THAT I WANT AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME CAUSE IM FUCKING AWESOME" but it always wears off before I can actually do anything. Perhaps it's a medical thing. I do feel absolutely drained most of the time. Perhaps it isn't. Perhaps I'm just a lazy bastard and there's no changing something so fundamental.

Pic related, it's how I feel half the time.

I should be happy, but instead I'm just depressed most of the time. I have happy times but they only last for a while. I've been to psychologists but I can't talk to them properly, as a result I feel like there's no way out. Man I hate myself

>>8173886
8173049 here
Thank you, makes a lot of sense.