because you have no confidence in yourself, you shitty ass shit.

hello sir. i have applied to 260 jobs since losing my employment 18 months ago and i have not been contacted for even one single interview. my experience includes writing for a local newspaper and working with candidates for public office on their ad campaign language.

i'm fucked, you're fucked, we're all fucked. when my unemployment runs out, i'm going to apply to security guard jobs, which i will do half assedly.

OP here. Looking through employment sites full of work for things I have zero qualification for. Hundreds of ads, not one of them I could apply for. For fucks sake. Fuck.

>>8049431
260? Do you not find that utterly soul crushing?

>>8049431
shit dicks, you're wasting your time if you aren't going to each and every one of those workplaces and establishing a dialogue with the employers.

>>8049473
that's your problem. You're too concerned with qualifications. You don't understand how it works.

The best way to start is to get temporary positions

Join the Army.

goodadviceblox

>>8049487
OK here is an example from the front page when I hit "browse for jobs in your area"
>Director; Structural Engineering; Buildings; High End Consultancy Brisbane $220K

I don't think they let unskilled laborers like me do that. Now imagine about 500 more job descriptions like that.

Why not join the army ? You get to shoot stuff and you're actually paid for it.

>>8049504
>>8049548
Because there is a few wars on right now.
Also, my dad went to Vietnam. Him and all his friends who went are all fucked up.

I've applied for probably over 1000 jobs and haven't got one. Then again I'm a 22 year old student with only a few years of work experience, so it's sort of understandable. I'm also on probation for being a dumb ass, so that doesn't help.

And yeah it's been over 1000, because my PO made me fucking document 10 job applications a week and turn them in, multiple that times like the 3 years ive been on it. lol

>>8049579

So join the Navy or the Air Force. Odds are you won't see combat, especially if you get the right job.

>>8049594
That is just fucking retarded. Not you I mean. The fact that you can apply for 1000 jobs and not get one.

The next person that complains about people on welfare I am going to stab.

>>8049473
first of all, i only apply for job for which i am totally qualified. second of all, yes i do find it soul crushing. i've had several panic episodes, a month of alcoholism, and a lot of avoidance/anxiety issues since the start of my job search. it's killing me.

>>8049476
you sound like a guy who doesn't have to worry about applying for jobs. i only find a single-digit number of jobs within driving distance of me per week. i've applied on both coasts and various places in the middle. i call to follow up on every application, even the local ones (10%) and so far, not one single employer has spoken to me regarding my application. they all -- ALL ... BAR NONE -- tell me "someone will look over your resume and we'll call you if we think you're the right fit".

femanon here
i couldn't pay rent last month either so i got on my webcam and let a bunch of guys fap to me for $3/minute and now i'm a millionaire. sorry penises aren't in demand. maybe next year?

>>8049688

Another femanon here. If you aren't trollin', how'd you set that up, exactly? I've been thinking of doing something like this because I am desperate for cash

Join the Air Force, its the nerdiest of the elements.

>>8049647
same situation here: i've applied for 1000 jobs or more since graduation -- just 260 since my last job (a 4 month gig)

>>8049647
Well you wouldn't be too out of line to call me retarded, lol. I'll gladly take a slice of humble pie on that one.

But yeah, it was pretty ridiculous. I got a ton of interviews, but most of them rejected me for employment based upon the grounds that I was on probation.

The one job I got (Which was Mcdonalds) fired me after a week when they ran a background check. PO promptly had me arrested and thrown in jail (I wont get into too much detail). Which then resulted in a shitstorm in court. (She tried to have my probation revoked sending me to Prison for 2-4 years. lol wut)

But not standing for that shit I told my lawyer the case and surprisingly he turned out to be a very competent, and witty public defender. After an hour long argument during sentencing for violating probation (Fucking never thought prosecutor's actually yelled OBJECTION!) and shitting a brick the size of Texas, I got off with no jail time (Expected was 3-6 months for just violating). and actually got my supervision reduced to no reported, PO almost got fired too. lol

Can't wait to get off in 2 days and hopefully get some work.

OP here. I am getting that desperate that I am considering doing crap like growing plants in my back yard (not weed) and selling them at markets and shit.

I know how to make recycled paper. I can sell that shit too. Dye it nice colours and make it smell nice. Old ladies love that shit.

>>8049718
either go to IMLive.com and figure out how to set it up

or get on cam4.com and charge via paypal.

>>8049742
"Reduced to no reporting"

My mistake

>>8049742
What? You broke your probation by getting a job? That's ridiculous.

>>8049785
by getting fired. a condition of probation is that you prove you're seeking employment and once secure you don't lose it.

mickey D's fired him FOR BEING ON PROBATION, which then activated jail time.

.. AND I'M PROOOOUD TO BEEEE AN AMERICAAAAAAN

WHERE AT LEAST I KNOWWW I'M FREEEEEEEEE

18 year old here, and fuck, I am not at a place mentally where I want to go to school. Fuck that.

I just want a min wage job, with no homework so I can just work on my photography. But fuck, even getting a shitty job is imposible.

grow opium poppies.

Been trying since High School to find a job, after 7 years, I only managed to get one interview...only one, and they didn't want to hire me. Fuck fuck fuuuuccckk.

>>8049845
Wait.

Go on probation and must find work.

Find work then get fired for being on probation.

People who enforce your probation punish you for getting fired, for being on probation.

What in the fuck?

Shit is bad now. I've sent out about 200 resumes since graduating last May and only had 2 interviews. I have engineering degree with good GPA...still no luck.

>>8049755

Thanks. I never thought I'd get this desperate, but at least I know things are bad all over. Doesn't make it feel any better, though.

>>8049896
How are you paying for stuff?

>>8049986
He's probably a basement dweller.Doesn't need much money.

where in the fuck do you people live and how fucking poorly qualified are you? I live in Vancouver and there are a fuckton of good jobs here for people willing to fucking work.

I used to feel bad about dropping out of university years ago, but now I'm happy as shit that I spent those extra three years building a career instead of farting around in residence and then "going travelling" like some type of fucking lazy nigger.

Bust your fucking ass and make yourself good at something unique. It's the only way you're going to get ahead.

>>8049986

Living with my father, doing odd jobs. Shit sucks.

>>8049936
>>good GPA

I assume this means first post graduation job, otherwise no one gives a shit. Sending out a million resumes won't get your foot in the door for a first job. You're going to have to break through somehow, bro.

I blame college grads who can't find jobs in whatever they have a degree for, and people with years of experinece who got fired from their old jobs.

DAMNIT GO GET A REAL JOB SO I CAN DO SIMPLE GRUNT WORK.

>>8049431
>>8049594
>>8049688
>>8049749
>>8049864
>>8050051
>>8049912
>>8049936

Holy fuck. MOVE! It's not hard.

>>8050026
>pull yourself up by your bootstraps!
hahahaohowow.jpg

i have a BA, 5 years exp in customer service, 2 years exp as a writer and 1 year as a security guard in charge of other officers. i also have volunteer experience in a political campaign for CT governor.

I live in CT, clearly.

>>8049431
oh sweet can i come and rob the mall you're guarding?

>>8050089
Moving takes planning and can be fucking expensive, faggot!

>>8050124
i guarded at a hospital. i would probably apply to an insurance company now.

>>8050089
it's not hard? to pay to transport your belongings, find a new apartment in a place where you know nobody and then what, cross your fucking fingers that there's work THERE?

>>8050090
#1 if shit sucks there- move somewhere else

>i have a BA
So does every fucking idiot

>5 years exp in customer service
This means absolutely nothing in terms of actual work.

>2 years exp as a writer
LOLOLOLOLOL! I'm an actual fucking professional writer who does nothing but write about what I love all day. I guarantee your 2 years experience as a writer did not involve you getting paid one fucking red cent which means you're not a real writer.

>1 year as a security guard in charge of other officers.
Wow, a job that every fucking immigrant is qualified for. Congratu-fucking-lations

>I also have volunteer experience in a political campaign for CT governor.
Yeah and it obviously got a lot done for you.

>>8050136
more fucking excuses. I moved across the country to get a better job and give myself more opportunity and it fucking worked. I had $500, a floor to sleep on, and a bag with some clothes. If you can't get that together you have bigger problems than not having a job.

>>8050161
wing it you fucking pussy. What the fuck do you have to lose? Put your back to the wall and make shit happen. Fortune favours the brave.

>>8050162
17% of american adults over the age of 22 have a BA or better. as far as my writing, it was 4 months of full time work and another year plus of freelance, plus a short internship.

as for the rest of your post, gee, i'm sure glad that you are so in love with yourself. you sound far superior to not only me, but everyone you meet, ever. i bet it's working out well for you to say so.

Fuck yeah, I think I'll make my life goal being a security guard.

EASY JOB HERE I COME.

>>8050178
How the hell did you manage that? You sleep in your car like a fucking nigger?

>>8050089

>Implying I can easily move out just like that with little to no money.

>>8050162

Hey man, you're being a real faggot

Either post your work to prove you're not some dumb ass 16 year old, or fuck off.

>>8050197
what do i have to lose? all my posessions and a place to live, not to mention unemployment insurance. so basically my entire livelihood. i would be homeless if i moved somewhere and failed to get a job there.

here, i can bide my time and send out applications.

>>8050205
step-brothers floor in a goddamned bachelor apartment. Shit fucking sucked but I got my ass out of there the second I had money for rent.
>>8050199
Sorry about being harsh, its probably not what you need to hear right now. But you have a hardcore defeatest attitude and your qualifications are nothing special at all.

I'm proud of myself because I was fucking homeless before. Not like "I'm crashing on somebody's couch" homeless- I mean actual fucking "where in the shit do I go tonight? I have no money and I don't know anybody" homeless.

If I can do it, you sure as fuck can do it.

I have a kickass apartment, a hot gf, I'm making about $50K from my 9-5 and have a wicked start-up that's attracting interest from venture capital companies. I have all this BECAUSE I FUCKING APPLIED MYSELF AND NEVER TOOK NO FOR AN ANSWER.

Try it sometime.

>>8050203
Lol I wouldn't count on that either. I went through the armed security training and applied for a bunch of openings. They say they'll get back to me but so far no one has. I'll give it until May before I start robbing bars and taxi drivers.

>>8050212
Also you are double screwed if you don't find work as soon as you move because you won't even have money for a place to live.

>>8050214
like I'm gonna upload my fucking tax return on 4chan.

I'm at work right fucking now and if I had a camera or a webcam I'd post a pic.

Believe me or don't believe me, that's fine if it makes you feel better about yourself.

I don't have to validate myself to a bunch of losers on the internet.

>>8050136
>>8050161
>>8050205
>>8050212
>>8050214
>>8050217
>>8050287
>>8050293
holy fuck, sure is excuses in here.

Biggest question, do you guys who have trouble finding jobs actually actively call back the places you apply to and follow up on your applications/resumes? Cause if you don't then you don't deserve to get the jobs you're bitching about not getting. Otherwise, sorry tough luck bros.

>>8050287
Well...shit.

Fucking America, too many people, not enough jobs.

>>8050345
exactly. I have to listen to so many queers bitch about how they can't find a job... then I can go on craigslist and there's like literally 10,000 jobs on there.

You need to apply yourself and make getting a job a full time job. If there aren't jobs for you where you live- you have to move to somewhere more promising. Could you imagine if nobody ever did that ever? The human race never would have fucking evolved out of Africa.

Searching out new horizons is what separates white men from niggers.

>>8050345
Yeah I've called places back and even gone as far to mail out letters to each place thanking them for their time. I didn't individually type out a unique letter for each one. Typical standard shit with the names changed around a bit added at the end for each situation.

Still no job though. Hopefully that changes in 2 days

>>8050246
you were a street person and you're giving me advice as if you have any to give? also: WHOAH 50K??????? HOLY SHIT YOU MUST BE THE RICHEST MAN IN THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD, *here i make a face like a 7 year old who sees his mother get a one-hundred-dollar bill from the bank*

also? i wasn't *bragging* about my qualifications. i was asked what they were.

you're the hugest faggot i've ever spoken to on 4chan. ON 4CHAN.

>>8050345
i call each job at least once and often as many as 5 times before i give up. to date i haven't gotten a single returned phone call despite leaving professional, courteous messages.

I have no people skills, makes it hard to find a job. I'm trying to improve, but I think I'll do easy mode. Joining the airforce.

>>8050395
Sure is unemployed rage in here.

Yeah, I was homeless before I dropped out of university. I was a dumb 19 year-old kid who made bad choices. Did I sit around blaming other people and whining and crying on 4chan? Fuck no.

I went out and did something about it. It took years. Fucking years and a lot of goddamned setbacks to get to where I am now. I'm younger than you, my future is a lot brighter than you, and I don't have the anger and hate that you obviously have inside you. I feel bad for you, homes.

I think you needed to be spoken to harshly, because its pretty fucking obvious that you need to change your life but you're too much of a faggot to do anything about it.

And yeah, that 50K a year at my age with no university to sit on my ass and write about sports all day is a pretty fucking wicked trade-off.

Wait, you can call about the job after you have sent in the resume? I thought you waited for them to call you?

What about going to a trade school or whatever and try..well uhmn...Networking?

>>8050444
oh yeah, my stock options, full medical and transportation allowance (not to mention free tickets and travel to major sporting events) are just sweeteners.

Sorry I don't make enough money to impress a guy who's pushing 30 and is an angry failure.

>>8050449
its called a follow-up call. Squeaky wheel gets the grease. Of course if the job ad says "no calls please' then don't fucking call.

>>8050444
you have no base for any of those accusations. i think you're projecting. you're still a faggot, and you also barely make minimum wage.

>>8050345

Yes, and nothing. I'm starting to seriously think about doing self-employment if this shit keeps up.

>>8050470
Huh, well fuck me then.

I sure wish my parents had told me about this kind of stuff, maybe I would have a job by now and not be forced to move home.

>>8050481
barely minimum wage eh? really? No wonder you're unemployed because you can't fucking do math.

Minimum wage where I live is 8 bucks an hour. I work a 30 hour week. 8 x 30 = 240 x 52 = $12480

I make nearly 4 times minimum wage. Nice try though. Also, that doesn't include all my benefits or my fucking start-up that might wind up making millions. No guarantees there, but you've gotta take risks to get ahead in life.

I seriously feel bad for you man. You need to fucking smarten up. Go work on a cruise ship or something, go plant trees in the bush or work on an oil rig. Anything to get your life moving forward bro. If I can do it you can do it. But fix up your fucking attitude first.

>>8050518
true story. i got my last job by following up. the guy called me right away and said that's what made me stick out.

>>8050470

You're wrong, employers hate this shit.

They really do.

It makes you look desperate and stupid and unprofessional.

If they want to hire you they will call you if they don't they won't. I know it sucks but if you want to get hired anywhere you have to accept this system.

>>8050563
lol. are you kidding me? Follow-ups are an expected parts of the interview process.

>>8050563
I somewhat agree with this guy. I called and one guy sounded pissed off. Others just usually give you the run around.

>>8050199
>>8050199

>as far as my writing, it was 4 months of full time work and another year plus of freelance,
>4 months of full time work and another year plus of freelance,
>another year of freelance
>year of freelance
>freelance

Oh, look, exactly what he said you did. And it turns out it wasn't even a proper two years.

Have fun exaggerating your resume bro.

>>8050577

I dunno. At my College they had an employer come in and give us a big speech about how we should do interviews and how we should make our resumes appealing and all that stuff (it was honestly very good and useful).

He said one follow-up call is "okay" but don't do it if you can help it.

Anything more than that essentially destroys your chance of getting the job.

Employers are busy fucking people. They don't want to get fifty calls every day "Hi! I was just wondering about that job I interviewed for last week!" They don't want that at all.

>>8050601
yeah dude, that guy is full of hate. Not that people in Connecticut ever have senses of entitlement or anything like that eh?

And I know he's gonna assume we're samefag too.

>>8050623
One follow up call is standard, but you have to do it the right way.

>>8050563

.. have you ever had a job jesus christ man if you're interested in it then you call back.

otherwise they figure you don't care. Hell back when my folks were getting jobs you'd send in a fucking thank you card for the interviewer's time.

ITT some douchebag thinks he knows about getting jobs that aren't sucking dick in the bathroom at the local olive garden for lube money with which to put large objects into his ass

OH YOU GOT BURNED

/thread /thread /thread

>>8050652

So what like I get home from the interview and call the employer?

What's the point of that?

I honestly don't know what the hell a follow-up call IS. When do I make it, exactly, and what do I say, because the whole thing seems pretttty superfluous.

Oh also the dude at my college told us to NOT be scared to fax/email/phone employers if we had some relevant info or needed to make a correction. That shit's acceptable (unless you're just bullshitting around the bush for an excuse to check with him again).

> I am a good worker.

No you're not. If you were a good worker you'd have an education and an unbroken work history. You haven't tried very hard up to now and you're BAWWWing.

Biggest turn off to employers: work history with unexplained gaps. You need to keep a job for 2-3 years. Have you ever done that?

No - because you're not a good worker.

/thread

OK, OP here. I just applied for a job in a sign writing shop online. I used to be a sign writer and still paint them as a hobby.
A tattooist. No experience but I am not a bad artist and would like to go down that road if I can get an apprenticeship.
An art supplies store. Used to freelance in illustration and did concept art for video games.
Got an interview putting together exhibits and stalls for events tomorrow.

If all of these fall through, well fuck, I'll just have to keep applying. Someone give me work.

Go on the job forum on city-data. Some people with Master's degree have sent in more than 3000 application, only getting back 5 calls for interview.

This is some bullshit. We need to get back to the days when people just walk in, talk to the manager and start the job the next day.

>>8050759

a little harsh bro

>>8050784

This is 4chan there is no such thing as too harsh.

What's the point of being anonymous if you can't act like a raging douchebag to strangers?

>>8050676

Well thanks for telling me this I didn't know that.

clean someone's house for 100 bucks

>>8050759
Yes, I have done that. There was also a time I was running my own business.

>>8050768

This is meaningless and missed the point. An uneducated person with experience in a demanded field will find a job easily. The people with masters will have no experience and will be applying for fewer vacancies in an already oversupplied sectors.

Find a sector demanding workers if you want a job.

I'm a labour economist by the way.

>>8050828

Sorry but I wouldn't call selling shitty weed and crack a "business". I sure as hell wouldn't put that on my resume.

Try again.

>>8050849
So what sectors are hot now?

>>8050828

Do you have gaps in your work history? If so, how long?

>>8050891
Like, a year. I was overseas.

>>8050868

Education and medicine.

That's pretty much it for now.

>>8050868

Public sector tends to bloat during recessions, this is no exception. Almost anyone can train to become a teacher in months (for example).

>>8050931

From the work history you've described I already know that's not true.

One year? And you have seamless job end/starts otherwise?

registered nurse (RN): 2 years schooling, 60k pay starting, extreme demand, will only grow with increases in old and sick people.

>>8050978
Are you telling me I did not go overseas? That I imagined it?

>>8051048

Jesus. No I'm not saying you imagined your trip overseas.

I'm saying that you have other gaps in your work history besides that.

>>8051075
Not for the 3 years leading up to that.
Why the hell would you call me a liar?

>>8051027
Moar, what else?

You don't stand out. You're not that special. Try harder.

I'm almost approaching one whole year of unemployment now. I was laid off in June of last year and now it's going to be April in a few days.

I can't find fucking anything. I think I'm going to be stuck with my parents for another year and my girlfriend isn't going to like dating a 23 year old who lives with his parents, and she'll leave.

Fuck my life. I have 1k to my name and no matter where I apply and call they all act as though the position has already been filled.

Where the hell do you live? I get an interview for every job I apply for. I just suck at interviews. .-.

>>8051228
Chicago, IL here
Where do YOU live?

OP here.
I've just exhausted any job sites so I'm going to print out my resume. Put some nice clothes on and hit the streets.

Before I go, anybody know of any places hiring in Melbourne, Australia?

>>8051131

Relax, you naughty boy.

What was the reason for your year overseas? And what do you put on job applications for that period.

>>8051256
Dayton, OH. .-.

It's kinda urban, and I look like a clean, polished girl I guess. I also exclusively apply to places that I know hire my "type"~ I mean, I hardly ever get the job because I'm a tweaky faggot but whatever.

You just have to try at appropriate places, I don't know. I wish you the most luck, robot.

>>8050698
>the whole thing seems pretttty superfluous.

Learn to stick up for yourself. Politely call 1-2 days afterwards. Say, "I haven't heard back from you, I'm inquiring on your candidate search."The whole job acquisition thing is superfluous.

If you call them and they don't want you, you've lost nothing, except maybe 45 seconds time. If you wait a day, call them, you might actually get a job because you show you're dedicated, interested, and maybe even deciding a photofinish for your target job.

There's always petty employers who can't deal with one more call, boo-fucking-hoo. You don't want to work for those people.

If you're in Canada this might help.

http://www.jobbank.gc.ca/Intro_eng.aspx

Does anyone have any tips for writing cover letters?

I can only ever put a few sentences, which are bullshit for the sake of having to write something. I'm sure once they see the cover letter they wouldn't even bother looking at the CV.

>>8051285
Riding a bicycle around Ireland.

>>8051534

How bizarre. I'm Irish.

What do you put on the application form? I would suggest putting down that you were working in Ireland.

No more broken work history.

Just lie on your resume it worked for me.

Employers don't check that shit unless you're applying for something really important and there are a lot of decent-paying easy-ass jobs out there that aren't important enough for employers to spend thousands of dollars checking the resumes of every candidate.

>>8051654
Yeah, that's what I've started doing this week. We'll see how that goes.

>>8049412
Okay guys. Quick 101 job strategy--Ready?

What you tried doing, when looking for work in the past, ISN'T going to work in an economy as crap as ours.

You are going to have to talk to friends, family, acquaintances and network the hell out of people. You are going to have to look to past employers, you are going to have to consider jobs you may not consider normally just so you can put some recent work experience on your resume.

Speaking of resumes-you are going to have to rework that resume for EVERY different job you apply for and I mean make it tailor made for each position so that it has a chance to outshine the hundreds of resumes that employer is already receiving. It's an "Employer's market out there" and they can be choosy these days.

Also, here's a biggy--if you can't find a job, volunteer at a place where there could be potential job openings in the future and do a good job and it may mean employment for you.

I know it's tough out there, I know. Worst case scenario, get hooked up with welfare, just temporarily, They have programs that actually help you look for work and in the meantime they can help you with food stamps and even motel vouchers sometimes.

Hang in there.

>>8051493
cover letters just have to prove
A) you've read their job ad
B) you're interested and have a resume summary of your qualification.

Do something simple:

>MegaSell Inc.
>[address goes here]
> I noted your ad on [craigslist/monster] and I wanted to apply for the position of _________.
> My background is in _______ and my education is ____. I'm sure my skills in ____, _____, and _____ will be of use to your firm. I am free [this week/immediately] and would be happy to meet to discuss the position.
>Anon's name
>Anon's address

bonus points go to you if you call them to inquire on the status of your interview.