Drink moar water
blox

Smile whenever you make eye contact with someone or speak to them. People will react to you better and be nicer to you, which will increase your own confidence and sociability.

>Even though you may be nervous about talking to random people, the worst you can get is raped and murdered with your body parts sprinkled across 5 states

fixed.

Don't ever come to this website.

there are actually 10 other pages to /r9k/

When using a public toilet (or indeed certain private ones), get into the habit of using the toilet paper to wipe the seat cover, this does three things; 1, checks that there is toilet paper available, 2, cleans/dries the toilet seat, 3, provides a landing pad to prevent splash backs.

put your right foot in front of your left foot. repeat.

inhale, exhale.

put food in your mouth, and let it slide down your throat.

when looking for shelter, make sure that the area you are surveying is unoccupied

>>4747221
THIS
people really underestimate the power of a smile, it can get you employment, free drinks, upgrades and cheats of all kind, being nice to people who are serving you food, or checking you into a hotel or onto an airplane can make such a huge difference in their day, and what goes around comes around!

Keep with you in your jacket pocket; A lighter (petrol lighter if possible)Notebook and pencilSmall locking knife (if legal in your area)Gum


.... hi kira

If you know the person in the toilet stall next to you is holding fire until you leave, open your stall door and then close it again. The first plop can then be greeted with a cheer and applause.

If you're an employer, make sure you don't hire any unlucky people by throwing half the applications in the bin

Bump for moar. These are interesting.

>>4747201
Why the gum?

>>4747302

so you can go all macguyver on someone's ass.

>>4747302
A) in case of bad breath
B) girls ask you for gum if they know you have it.

Get out of bed, get into the shower, and get your day started. It's far too easy to waste an entire day off by lounging around in your underwear.

>>4747277
Your second piece of advice is one of those things I've always fucking hated, because it's so stupid. Whether someone wins the lottery or not doesn't affect how smart they are. Similarly, whether they are in the top 50% doesn't affect how suitable they are for the job. Don't follow this advice, /r9k/, it's fucking retarded.

Don't go to jail and be buggered by large men called sally.

If you act like you have a lot of sex, girls will have sex with you

Chuck some toilet paper down the toilet before you take a shit. This guarantees there won't be any splashback.

Buy a pack of mints and keep them in your pocket at all times, in case you need to have fresh-smelling breath in a hurry.

I remember an old thread were a guy posted a Lockpicking manual. Who has it?

Duct tape is the solution to many of life's problems.

>>4747231
This, since I stopped visiting 4chan (except at work) my life suddenly got awesome! Now I have lots of time to meet with friends/work out/read/whatever I want. Because once you go on channel 4 you'll probably stay for couple hours (waiting for responses, browsing pointlessly, whatever). And that's couple hours day after day. Think of all the stuff you could be doing in that time. Now I truly enjoy walks or just sitting and looking at nature while before I always had "I could be on the internet instead of wasting time here" in the back of my mind.

>>4747201
OP thanks for the shoes advise, will test it out. Got my shoes all wet like 3 weeks ago, put them outside to "let them breathe" and they still smell. Hope you're right about this.

>>4747201

>Open a bank account, put a hundred dollars in it. Then put the atm card in a box somewhere. Having a hundred dollars that no one knows about could save your life.

That's actually a pretty good idea.

>>4747321
I think he was joking friend.

>>4747309
That's stupid. I use mints instead.

Make lots of money - you can buy things using money.

Have sex with women (or men if you would prefer) - it makes you feel good.

Eat food - you need it to live.

Drive to work - it's faster than walking.

Read books - you will learn things.

Urinate when necessary - not doing so can be disastrous.

I request a preemptive archive. This thread is potentially gold

Watch out for whales.

buy some nice expensive envelopes (and I mean expensive - the more you pay the better). Now after you get a paycheck count how much of it you'll spend on bills and basic stuff (food, gym membership and so on). Say you're left with 600$ "for bullshit stuff". Now take 30-50% out of it, put it in a nice, expensive envelope, glue it together and hide it. You won' want to waste a nice and expensive envelope so you won't open it for bullshit purpouses (like "I want a beer"). And you've got yourself like $3k at the end of the year just by sacrificing *some* of the pointless stuff (alcohol, cinema tickets and so on)

Always have either an ace up your sleeve or a plan B.

If you're desperate to get laid, try and socialize with 14-16 year old girls.
They'll dig you due to your age, they're pretty easy to manipulate and they can be quite entertaining to hang out with for a limited time. This is especially useful if you're travelling in Europe since most countries' age of consent is under 18.

Obviously, you can't be disgustingly fat and gross and you need to know how to not come across as a creeper.

>>4747363

This is the stupidest thing I've ever read.

>>4747346
I think its a bad idea. What constitutes an emergency? my $100 wouldn't last there for a year! But then again maybe that's just my bad financial planning

>>4747321
convince bar staff that your pint is off by sticking your finger up your arse before holding the glass close to their nose.

single men: convince people that you have a girlfriend by standing outside Etam with several bags of shopping, looking at your watch and occassionally glancing inside.

Be careful when giving street alcoholics money for 'a cup of tea', as some of the less scrupulous ones may be tempted to spend it on strong liquor.

Sperm make ideal model tadpoles for OO gauge model railway ponds.

>>4747363
I think this is a good idea. I spend money when it is too accessible. The envelope thing would force me to take out 10 or 20 seconds to think before i do!

Broken glass can be picked up with white bread.

Nosebleeds can be stopped by holding your breath for around 30 seconds.

>>4747380
Something tells me you're British.

>>4747363
hahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

>>4747201
Dont. Burn. Bridges.

It doesn't make you look like a big man to anyone, and it'll fuck you over in the long run.

Man the fuck up and take shit on the chin, or speak out properly if shit is done wrong by you... dont bottle shit up and burn bridges. Can't stress that enough.

>>4747380
>single men: convince people that you have a girlfriend by standing outside Etam with several bags of shopping, looking at your watch and occassionally glancing inside.

Are you serious? Why?

>>4747389
Please ignore what he said about pints.

>>4747380
At first I was like WTF? Retard! and then i loled slightly

Once your socks are wet, you'll never be comfortable. Just take them off and get a dry pair.

If you're on a budget, use the 'draft' option when printing long documents, it uses about 1/3 the toner you'd normally use and doesn't look too bad.

When playing rock paper scissors, 90% of humanity goes scissors on first turn.

Keep a tin of altoids with you, and right before you take a big drink of water, put it in your mouth and chew it up. When you drink the water, it will feel a lot cooler than it really is.

Don't play basketball in running shoes or you risk twisting your ankle.

If you want the freshest breath ever, use a really strong mint mouthwash like Listerine until you can't bear it anymore, then immediately rinse out your mouth with the hottest water you can stand.

To avoid the 'smell cloud' effect when somebody walks past you in a corridor: Before you put a top on, spray your cologne three times in the air in front of you and then walk through it. People will still smell it when they get close but not if they're standing behind you in a queue.

Put antiperspirant on and then deodorant on top.

>>4747336
>>4747336
>>4747336
>>4747336
>>4747336
>>4747336
I am very interested in this man's proposal.
Please attend to it immediatley.

Applying pressure inbetween your thumb and forefinger (the webbed-like piece of skin) can stop your gag reflex. Try it.


Also, archive this shit. 500 posts to help those who read - GO!

Keep a bump key in your wallet. You never know when you might have to open a locked door.

>Put smelly shoes in a plastic bag and put it in the freezer overnight. The smell is caused by bacteria, which will die when deep frozen.

You fail elementary school.

>Get hold of an army ration pack and keep it in your house / car. Especially useful in cold climates.

Fuck your shit, maybe MRE's are alright but the ratpacks we get here fucking suck arse. You are better off making your own. Bound to be tastier, and probably more nutritious.

If you're running low on weed. Do spots!
This involves rolling a small ball of weed about 2mm in diameter and squeezing it in between two red-hot butter knives (heated up with a gas stove top).
This creates a big poof of smoke which you then inhale with a cone made from rolled up cardboard.
It's the same as a bong hit with a lot less weed!

Save money on expensive binoculars - just stand closer to the object you want to look at.


(Yes, I stole this from Viz)

If your trying to balance on one foot or on something, stare at something not moving or pull on your ear lobe.

Get a small wallet that fits inside a bigger wallet. Keep your cash in the small wallet and your bank cards etc in the larger one.
When you go out drinking only take the small wallet with you - if you lose, it you have only lost your cash.

>>4747450
denature then

If you want something but don't have to willpower to directly stop yourself, run a mile before you get it. If it's still the first thing you want when you're done, get it. If your first thought is that you;d want a drink, a breather, whatever- and not the other thing? don't get it until you can run a mile and still want it.

Keep relatively healthy
Do things which tax your mind
Be comfortable smiling
Have a goal in life other than fucking

Read advice dog.

>>4747435
What is a bump key?

From now on if you post in this thread replying to another post, add a tip at the beginning/end.

If you have a sneeze you can't seem to get out, look towards a bright light source (not the sun, people!) and it will make things easier.

When you're watching TV or listening to the radio, set it to the volume you want, and then turn it down three notches, to save your wife from coming over and doing it. (viz)

>>4747453
NZfag detected. Guess how I know?

A bump key is a key with regular serrations that you can wiggle back and forwards whilst turning to try and jiggle the pins inside the lock into place so you can open the lock.

They actually do let everybody off 'planes these days, so you don't have to leap to your feet and walk to the door the second the 'plane touches down

If you have a piece of food caught in your throat (especially a potato/corn chip), a piece of bread will dislodge it.

Do your dishes as soon as your done using the, whether it be clean them or put them in the dishwasher. Takes no time, and when your done you'll feel better knowing that you dont have to do them later

The best way to prevent a hangover:
When you get in, eat a banana and then drink 2 pints / a quart of water. You'll wake up in three hours to piss. Piss, and then drink another pint of water and go back to sleep. When you wake up you'll feel much better than you would otherwise.

>>4747481

Actually looking at the sun is precisely what you could do. The sneeze is caused by squinting so hard at the bright light source (does something to your sinisuses or whatever) so looking at the sun makes you squint major hard, thus making it the most effective way of inducing the sneeze.

Two things you should know:

1.) Money does bring happiness - (Or at least peace-of-mind, most people will tell you otherwise but that's because they have very little money OR have money but don't want you to have it)
2.) Most people are actually nice

>>4747412
I've always been interested in the anti-pespirant + deo thing, because I barely smell anything with just a regular roll-on anti-pespirant.
However, aren't my phemerones supposed to be way more attractive than deo? So shouldn't I just cover up the smell of sweat and let me natural smell come out?

learn to play texas holdem, play very tight - in case you need money you can always go to a casino.

To improve your posture, do the following whenever you notice yourself slouching:
Stand up with your arms by your sides, and stick your thumbs out. Turn your arms outwards so your thumbs point as far back as possible, your chest should be out and shoulders forced back. Now drop your shoulders and relax your arms. Your shoulders should be back but not uncomfortable, and your thumbs should be pointing forward. This is how you should always be standing.

>>4747395
Dude. Truer words have never been spoken. I just...truer words have never been spoken. Damn.

>>4747523

If you smell like a hobo, women will not want to go out with you. And your pheromones are not hidden by deodorant, so don't worry about that.

If you have a GPS, also keep a map in the glove-box. Those dependant on GPSs generally have a poor sense of direction, and Murphy's Law dictates that your GPS will break down on the day you're in a hurry.

Where do I obtain a bump key?

Shower daily and keep your sheets clean and changed regularly. Clean people generally feel better about themselves and life in general when they are clean and somewhat organized.

>>4747489
Wrong!
A backpacker exposed to lots of NZ potheads, so close to the truth i suppose!

Should you ever find yourself in a fistfight, here are some tips that could potentially save your life:

-Unless you know for certain that you can, don't try to outrun your opponent. Should you run and be caught, you'll be off-guard and will have used up energy that could of been better spent defending yourself.

-Stay focused. Don't get 'pumped up', you won't be able to think as clearly.

-Rather than being offensive, try to parry/block a punch or kick, then counter-attack while your assailant is off-balance.

-The best places to aim a punch are the throat and the kidneys. Contrary to popular belief, the balls are not a particularly good place to aim. This is because of the following:
a) It's easy to counter
b) It's suprisingly easy to miss, especially if he's wearing baggy pants
c) Unless you do it extremely hard, odds are you'll just piss off the guy more, particularly if he has been fighting for a while.

-Take a few lessons in grappling.

-Use solid parts of your body, such as your elbows, knees, and forehead. A headbutt to the nose or jaw is highly effective in almost any situation.

-A very effective, yet simple move to use is as follows:
1) Jab your opponent in the face with your left arm. It doesn't need to be a very hard punch, it's mainly a distraction.
2) Bring your right knee up into your opponent's stomach as hard as you can. This will cause him to kneel forward, assuming you do it hard enough.
3) Immediately slam your right elbow down onto the back of his head as hard as possible.
4) From there, the only possible outcomes is that you've either knocked him out, or knocked him to the ground. In any case, you now have a major advantage.
See the pic in case you're not getting it.

Keep a regular sleeping pattern, you'll fuck up your routine if you don't have consistent sleeping hours.

Pull down your pants before taking a shit.

Howthehellisthismootblocksimeanreallycomeon.
Liquor before beer, you're in the clear
Beer before liquor, you'll get sicker quicker.

A little rhyme someone once told me to avoid hangovers when out drinking. IT WORKS.

>>4747552
Obtain a regular key and file it down. It's not as simple as "jiggling" either, though it is quite simple. Look it up on youtube.

Working out a couple times a week will give you more energy, keep you in shape, make you feel better about how you look, and will generally make you feel happier and healthier

Learn to shoplift like a fucking boss. Then, when you're broke, it wont matter because you know how to fucking shoplift.

>>4747453
As a stoner who smokes spots regularly. A gravity bong will get you more stoned with less weed and they're easy as fuck to make. Google it.

>>4747537
That didn't make any sense to me at all. Anyone else?

>>4747561

Post a tip with every post, you fucking dirty backpacking hippie retard. Go pick some more fruit a shiny coin, you fucking waste of space.

If you've already mastered manly arts (fightin', earning money, resourcefulness, machine repair, home repair, emotional restraint, prudence, etc), learn to cook and to sew. Many would call this "girly", but if you can cook and sew in addition to mastering all of the stuff men are expected to know, you will be even more self-reliant. Self reliance is the defining characteristic of manliness (prove me wrong), so learning a skill can only ever make you more manly.

>>4747550
Really?
But it doesn't make sense.
Deodorant basically covers up all your smells, right?
So wouldn't that cover up my pheromones too?

>>4747570

Real men don't get hang overs

>>4747597
Basically, throw your shoulders back, and stick your chest out.

>>4747602
Pheromones aren't a smell, it's a chemical.

Besides, the whole "Pheromone" thing is bullshit.

>>4747603
Yeah sure, if we were all chuck norris, and ejaculated money from chocolate dicks.

>>4747253
Ran into trouble at part 3. How do I Heimlich maneuver?
>>4747277
It is a 50/50 chance. By definition, those that end up in the bin are less "lucky" that those who don't

>>4747627
IT'S A FUCKING JOKE!

>>4747585
This is true. But bucket bongs are difficult to make (as simple as they are!) when you are already gaffed!

>>4747585
>>4747597
>>4747603

POST FUCKING TIPS WITH YOUR POSTS YOU STUPID POT SMOKING SHITHEADS. Jesus, and you 'tards expect us to believe smoking pot DOESN'T damage your brain?

>>4747602

No. People are extremely sensitive to pheromones, and can detect them in parts per billion. It is not like regular smell, which is not very sensitive at all, and can be overwhelmed by another smell.

Besides, unless you normally have women all over you, you need to NOT smell like a hobo to have any chance. Even if you have compatible pheromones, they'll still be repulsed by your stank.

When taking a photo, fill the frame.

Make sure you know how to jump start a car, and change the oil, and change a tire.

Fixing a flat tire on a bike takes ten minutes at most. Don't put it off for months and say you can't come on a bike ride because you have a flat tire

When you see a sign on the highway or freeway that says "SPEED MONITORED BY AIRCRAFT NEXT __" that means that there are no speed traps during that area. There will be one when the area ends and there will probably be a sign that says "END AIRCRAFT PATROL"

Love these threads.
When you get offered to do something in life, this could be ANYTHING no matter how small or big, and you picture it/yourself doing it, and think, 'nahh. that's just not for me' or 'maybe i could try it later in life' or some bullshit.
You know those things?
They're part of life. Do those things. Live your fucking life.

>>4747570

actually no, it just means you havent learned how to drink.

>>4747640
OK CAPTAIN BUTTHURT!
I suppose pot has made me a bit slow.

Incidently, did you know in Winamp 5 with Bento/Big Bento set as the skin
Go to Preferences -> Skins -> Modern Skins -> Current Skins
If you double click the box you can play snake.

>>4747412
>
If you want the freshest breath ever, use a really strong mint mouthwash like Listerine until you can't bear it anymore, then immediately rinse out your mouth with the hottest water you can stand.

Goddamn that sounds painful

>>4747629
But the logic is flawless

If you drive a really old car, always carry Q20 or such like in your car.
Garantueed at some point you will drive in a major thunderstorm and your car will just like stop.
Open your distributor cap - spray in some magic spray, close it up and off you go!
(It displaces the water which was causing shorting)

Wear a tie, belt and singlet as often as possible. The tie and belt make you look good, and the singlet keeps your shirt sweat free (for the caffeine consumers or larger gentlemen amongst us, you know what I mean).

Plus, all 3 may serve as emergency items (tie as a napkin/sling/bandage, belt about a meter of strong rope, and a singlet as a piece of fabric) - never know when you'll need them.

having a glass of water as soon as you wake up really helps you to get up and feel energised

Life is too short to be making excuses and not doing what you really want.

It's better to try and fail than live with regret.

As you think, you shall become.

Never settle for less if you want something better out there. You won't be happy down the line.

>>4747640
Awesome. So rollon + sprayon?

>>4747734
tldr rape dem bitches

>>4747640
>POST FUCKING TIPS WITH YOUR POSTS
I did give a tip, it was just weed related.

>you 'tards expect us to believe smoking pot DOESN'T damage your brain?
What the fuck is this faggotry? I haven't seen anyone mention anything like this. Maybe if you smoked more weed you wouldn't be such a uptight angsty whiny little hoe over the internet.

If you feel like your life is stagnant and you are stuck in a rut.
Go bunjee jumping or skydiving.
The act of complete abandon when you jump puts everything in perspective. It's difficult to explain.

Be nice to people even if they are complete cunts. People watching will think 10x more highly of you.

>>4747201
I once read a Something Awful forum thread that was just like this.
Called Tips for Life or something?

>>4747749
>I haven't seen anyone mention anything like this.

Obviously you haven't been reading your own "literature". Unemployed college students in my area are always trying to convince me that pot does not at all affect your intelligence. They'd be more convincing if they didn't speak in a slow drawl and "ummm" a lot. Also, you could help the case if you did something intelligent like.. oh, I don't know, posting tips in a tip thread? (>>4747749 had no tip, weed related or otherwise)

---

Food gets "burnt on the outside/frozen on the inside" when they're cooked on too high a heat. Cook on as low a heat as time and your hot plate will allow.

To clean the pipes of a wood burning stove, one or two mothballs thrown into the fire will help to loosen soot and creosote.

if you normally just browse 4chan after you get home from work/college/whatever, put that time to more constructive use. Read a book or teach yourself something (buy a textbook or an instrument or something)

you will be amazed at how that knowledge/skill will come in handy in conversation/everyday life.

This life, it's really short. Want a gf? Want a better one? Want a job? Want a better one? You won't wake up one day with a gorgeous girl in bed with you and a Cadillac in your garage. Go and live your life. Make mistakes, learn from them. Trying is the hardest part, but if you don't try, you won't get anywhere in life. Stop procrastinating and srsly go live your life.

>>4747222
Paranoid bitch.

TIP: Rape women, its free sex.

Don't double back on your statements. Stick to them.

If you want to know where your girlfriend's been, feign disinterest. Usually she'll tell you herself.

>>4747796
There is one of these threads at least once a week here. Usually they're called "life hacks" or something to that effect.

>>4747806
Would this butthurt faggot fuck off!
I'm sorry I'm not following your shitty rule about posting tips with each reply.

Heres my rule:
Every post must start with "Fuck the Butthurt Rulemaker!"

Also:
No tip

>>4747829
Can you throw me a link? Google's giving me nothing.

>>4747806
Are you dumb or just trying to be mean?

>>4747806
What a fucking stupid tip too LOL

>>4747831
For fuck's sake man, shut up! We're having a thread that's helping people here.
You're the guy with the inferiority complex that everyone tries to ignore but eventually beats up.

>>4747424
WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME!?!?!?!?!?!?

>>4747453
i don't think the average stoner has the coordination to do this. especially not after the equivalent of a few bong hits

Buy a tire plug kit and a cheap cig. lighter socket air compressor for your car.
If you get a flat and your spare is flat then you'll either be able to repair the tire or your spare.

(Remember you can only plug holes in a tire if it isn't in or near the sidewall)

>>4747857
0/10 nice try though, buddy

Don't spend your teenage years chasing girls.

>>4747831
>>4747843

>I'm on 4chan
>I smoke pot
>I align myself so much to weed "culture" that I get upset when anyone attacks it.

I certainly care deeply about what you think of me! How will I sleep tonight knowing that you are upset? gb2 420chan, faggot.

--

Buy rechargeable batteries. You'll break even after the second-to-third charge, depending on how many you buy.

>>4747806
God your retarded. What I was saying was in you're post specifically -
>you 'tards expect us to believe smoking pot DOESN'T damage your brain?
Is not relevant to this thread in the least bit. How would I know what the local "college dropouts" in your area talk about? Did I spell it out clear enough for you? I think being so much of a gigantic faggot has damaged your brain. Think about what you're going to say before you post.

God damn not to be a hater but Op's tips are fucking retarded.

$100 in a bank account you'll surely foret about
Freezing your shoes? Ok now I have shoes I can't wear cause they're cold as fuck, and they'll be wet when they unfreeze.
Oh no my napkin picked up with my cocktail oh no!
Put a weird object in a wierd place? How about just fucking writing it down n a piece of paper an taping it to your bathroom mirror? God damn worst tips ever.

If you're bored/depressed go to iTunes, blare it loud, and start dancing. Feels good.

Shave your pubic hair with one of those electric beard trimmers.

Feels SOOO good, man. Because you don't get itchy like you would with a razor and then you don't have to have any pubic hair.

>>4747923
0/10, maybe 5 for effort.

>>4747936

You're not giving tips dipshit.

--

Compliment people, It will make them like you a lot more and will make them feel better about themselves.

Don't trust anyone, but pretend you trust everyone.

>>4747910
most people don't forget about bank accounts, its a kinda cool tip
it probably would work + all you have to do is leave them out in the sun for an hour..
agreed that one sucks
the weird object idea is that its so obscure it will stick in your memory 100% so you never really forget it, so you won't NEED to be reminded. maybe not the best but could be useful for osme

>>4747201
Make little things make you happy.
Sometimes my highlight of the day is getting new shower gel. It makes me happy.

WEED probably doesn't damage the brain (unless use is long term and sustained). It does take away your motivation and leave you apathetic. The people who have no problem with this are generally the long term heavy smokers. Most other people realise what it's doing to them and cut down or stop.

And alot of your run of the mill stoners have been smoking throughout highschool, which is not good. It's like they stop emotionally developing. Sort of freaky. Those 23 year old children.

Stoners live for weed, that's their problem. Weed should be a recreational activity, a reward for achievment.

>>4747905
>God your retarded.
>your
Sure thing, buddy.

>Is not relevant to this thread in the least bit.
But posting about "weed" in a tips thread is? I know you probably have no attention span or memory, but the whole problem here is that you 420 fuckwits are hijacking the one good thread on the front page. I'm the one still posting "tips" in this "tips" thread, remember?

>How would I know what the local "college dropouts" in your area talk about?
Yeah, because you potheads totally sound different to one another (PROTIP: you absolutely don't). I have to put up with your shit when I go to college to get my degree, I don't want to hear your whiny shit when I relax on the Internet after a hard day of WORK or STUDY (you may want to use a dictionary here).

--

If you have shit stuck in your back teeth (eg, from crackers or cereal), and don't have gum, chew a tissue and then spit it out.

I love these kind of threads

Shave in the shaver, it'll be much much smoother

Rub some shampoo on the shower mirror to avoid it fogging up.

if the zipper is stuck try rubbing a pencil on it, the grafit (whats it called in US?) in the pencil will "oil" the teeth

Learn how to change a cars oil and wheels/tires, It only takes half an hour at the most, and it will save your ass more than once.

Gyms are utterly useless to most people and are basically a scam. You can do the same exercises without any high-tech equipment pretty much anywhere.

>>4747309
>>4747302
Gum also comes in handy if you're making a bong airtight

To sleep well on a hot night, wet a sheet or bath towel that is large enough to cover you with cool or cold water, and wring it or run it through the spin cycle on a washing machine until the sheet is quite damp but not dripping wet. Place the dry towel or sheet on your bed underneath your body and use the wet sheet as your blanket. The damp blanket will keep you cool.

>>4747570
This is a fucking load of bullshit.

There's no actual evidence to suggest that the order of what you drink affects a hangover. However, there is evidence that drinking different kinds of liquor/beer/wine in one sitting will result in a more potent stew of toxins in your bloodstream, meaning a more powerful hangover.

That said, I'm genetically predisposed to shaking off hangovers. God damn it's awesome being Irish/Norwegian. We drink like it ain't no thing.

buy high quality meat/fruit/veg
it might cost a bit extra but its sooooooooo much nicer

>>4747923
Related to this: Trim or shave your pubes, no matter if you'll get laid anytime soon. Your dick appears bigger, making you more confident.

Learn to lie well. There are few more valuable skills than this. Come home to your wife at 2 AM? Kid asks you about sex? Boss asks you about work you haven't done? A good liar can get out of any of these things.

To be more social: Always, always travel whenever you can. It's an eye opening experience, and most people love hearing/telling about times you/they traveled. It's an easy way to start up a conversation, just keep something clearly foreign on you from a country you've visited, or if you must a foreign looking item from a country you know a lot about. I guarantee you, people will ask about it.

Your interests are no better than other people's. Don't expect people to appreciate your interests if you don't appreciate theirs, no matter how shallow and stupid you think their interests are. Approach people's interests with curiosity and at least feigned respect.

If, in a social situation, the group clearly believes something retarded, do not correct them unless you have jokes prepared for when you do. Example: A group of my history classmates were talking about how Napolean was a midget. I told them he was actually average height, and the British made the shortness thing up. They ignored me and I had to leave the conversation to end the awkwardness. Correcting people is a huge buzzkill, but if you can joke about it you appear knowledgeable while keeping the conversation alive.

If you want to get in shape or lose weight, but lack the motivation, work on one part of your body at a time. This gives you much more obvious results, and you'll find it easier every time you switch to a new part.

>>4747716
I have to do this with WD-40 in my '92 Maxima.

>>4748068
oh and for a tip:

If you're running low money and need food, make some ramen and crack an egg into it. The egg adds some nutritional value to the otherwise unhealthy ramen and it's generally filling for only around one dollar.

Be nice to tourists, sometimes they give you monies if you show them where X is.

moar tips

Break the law more often. Don't get caught.

Steal internet.

Smoke salvia.

>>4748083

If you live off farmer's markets, dumpster diving (of supermarkets and bakeries), and reduced cost items, and put it all together with home cooking, you can live for ~$30/week/person (I did it for a month, shit works).

>>4748084
FORCHON TIPS:

-"noko" is all lowercase.
-On boards with pages labelled 0-10, if you manually enter page 11 you can view one or two threads that are about to 404.

PREEMPTIVE MOOTBLOX
>>4747618
> Pheromones aren't a smell, it's a chemical.
... Do you even know what a smell is?

Unrelated Tip: Read, and if you arent terribly busy, keep communication lines open. You never know what you will end up doing some monday night.

Grow your own fucking tomatoes. Holy shit. Go out and by a tomato plant now. You will thank me.

>>4748102
Furthermore a one pound box of pasta costs around a dollar and you can get 2-4 servings from it (It says 8 but I generally eat half the box when I make it). Five dollars can get you dinner for a week, and maybe a lunch or two.

>>4748109
well fuck i never knew that second 1
cheers bro

These threads would be so much better without the GO LIVE YOUR LIFE retards.

>>4748139
You'll get fat off of this.

mark my words.

Tips for delicious food:
Bake your own bread. Home baked bread is delicious, and having to wait for your food helps break the habit of just grabbing some wrapped up ball of sugar and fat.

If you don't like eating them alone, chop up vegetables and put them in your food. Your food will taste just as good and you get more nutrition.

Eat meals more regularly, and stop yourself from grabbing random snacks too often. Your meals will pretty much always be healthier than your snacks if you aren't using thisiswhyyourefat.com as a cookbook, and even if they don't taste as good your hunger will make the meal seem better.

Learn to like tea. It's healthy, cheap, and once the taste is acquired, delicious.

Learn how to pair drinks with meals. You'll be a much better host for guests and the food really is a lot better.

Experiment with different types of cheese. Sticking to American, processed, cheddar and once in a while, mozzarella or swiss gets bland, and is unhealthy.

>>4748127
This. I don't like tomatoes myself, but it saves a fuckton of money for the people who do.

>>4748083

By adding egg you mean raw egg or some cooked variation?

Be present.
Don't look back at the past or look forward to the future.
The present moment is all you have.

>>4748152
I don't think getting fat is something I need to worry about right now. And my pen died while writing /r9k/ :(
>>4748172
I generally crack the egg while the noodles are still in the water so it poaches.

>>4748152
>>4748139

This. Home cooked food is amazingly economical - but if you try and cut corners and live off JUST pasta, you will get fat and unhealthy. Living healthily is much cheaper than even the "value" menu at McDonalds, the only thing it costs is time and effort.

>>4748217
Yeah, I didn't mean solely from pasta since the person would need lunch and breakfast and pasta by itself isn't very good.

>>4747221

This is probably one of the best advices I've seen in a long while.

Fuck your tomato plants, make a whole damn garden.
Lettuce
Tomato
Onions
Potatoes
Carrots

Growing these starts out expensive, (Bags of soil, planters if you don't have a backyard, water and manpower ofc)

>>4748276
Herbs too. Shit's expensive at the store and you can grow your own for much cheaper and have them a lot fresher (as in just picked).

Use a Pay-as-you-go Cell Phone plan.

>>4747277

>>If you're an employer, make sure you don't hire any unlucky people by throwing half the applications in the bin

I lol'd.

I'm not sure how usefule this is, but it's a cool party trick.You can strike a safety match on a glass window instead of the box.

Find a glass window and put the match against it
Using firm but not too hard pressure:
Drag the match fast, steadily and far across the glass

Great Success!

>>4748298
Depending on your usage and whatnot a pay-as-you-go can be more expensive than a cheap postpaid plan.

Keep a pay-as-you-go cell phone in your car with some time on it.

And always keep a towel in there too.

>>4748298
This is dumb.
It's dependant on country, service provider etc

Here's some...

- Keep all old articles of clothing, you never know when you need them for fabric.
- The color of your room will change your attitude towards things in life, a good color to avoid is red because it's said to raise your temper, Orange is said to boost creativity, etc...
- Never shorten words typing, even on msn (eg, hi how r u?). Typing full words will help your typing overall.
- Don't grocery shop hungry
- If you're a weeaboo and you enjoy art, buy art of the anime you like drawn in a different fashion that's subtle enough so that guests won't notice, but other weeaboos will. Usually these pictures can brighten up a room and you can enjoy them without being embarrassed.

>>4748139
Well it does if you want to eat dry pasta.

Tip: make a pasta salad. Very healthy, very tasty, very good for warm days.

Just cook some pasta and let it cool down, throw some vegetables/meat/fruit/fish in it. Really any leftovers. This also works with rice and even potatoes.

I eat this 5 days a week and shit is cheap, healthy and easy to make. Furthermore you can also use it as a snack.

Just buy the fucking BOOK.

In some countries and certain service providers you can subscribe to a service which triangulates the position of your cellphone (normally to within a kilometre or so)

Buy a cheap phone on prepaid and keep it in a secret place in your car wired to a car charger. If your car is stolen you can track the car using this service.

Example i'm from South Africa and my service provider offers this:
http://www.look4me.co.za/

gave your egg too much on the pan and now it has stuck to the button and you have to scrape it off?

No problem, bro
Take the cleaning agent you use for dish washing fill the pan with water and sparklefresh or whatever you use and put it on the stove while its still hot. that cleaning agent will soften up the burned parts of the pan making it a WHOLE lot easier to clean up.

Furthermore half the tips in this thread are completely useless to everyday life.

Check out the guide to everything. trust me it has a lot of important everyday tips for you. http://members.optusnet.com.au/argyle85/index.html

premitivemoootbloxxxkcs

>>4747221
>Smile whenever you make eye contact with someone or speak to them. People will react to you better and be nicer to you, which will increase your own confidence and sociability.

I disagree. If someone is having a really shit day, and I smile at them, my presence isn't going to brighten up their day. They're going to think "Yeah, hope your having a nice fucking day, jackass".
You need to approach people on a mutual ground. If they're happy, chime in happy, if you can't tell, chime in void.

>>4748419
>>4748419
No no no shut up shut up

you wouldnt wanna be around people who gets happy when you're down yourself.

sad people who are around happy people will get happier than sad people around sad people.

>>4748356
Oh obviously; vary a lot and keep eating bread and fruit for breakfast and lunch. Don't just eat pasta.

>>4747910

Freezing your shoes? Ok now I have shoes I can't wear cause they're cold as fuck, and they'll be wet when they unfreeze

This actually works... they don't get wet because they're in a plastic bag, tool. And they take about a minute to come to room temp.

>>4747570
Dude, that's wrong. Raising the alcohol level (beer->liquor->hard stuff) is ok, but lowering it will fuck you up

>>4747564

You have no idea how to fight, you can't copy fighting combos off video games. Fuck you. Have fun getting bashed, cunt.

>>4748513

This. Also, there's no "fighter's honor" or whatever. Fight dirty.

Don't hold in farts.

I notice that many of my white friends don't know how to talk to niggers and get nervous around them (I'm white myself). Since you're all socially awkward dicksmears, I'll help you out. This is advice for communicating with niggers, not black people.

1. Don't be nervous. I notice that most white people get nervous around nigs, apparently out of fear of saying the wrong thing or just something stupid. Relax. Don't make any references to your skin color or theirs until you're cool with them. Making a joke about your whiteness is fine in most cases, but don't dwell on it. Okay, actually, never make a joke based on their color. Just yours, if at all.

2. How do you know you're cool with a nig? They'll often greet you first, or after you make a joke they'll laugh and say something like "(Anon) a fool/(Anon) crazy." They'll refer to you as "my nigga" or "homeboy," though the latter is less common these days.

3. If they use a term or phrase you don't understand, don't be afraid to ask them what it means. They'll appreciate you taking an interest in their dialect.

4. Don't be afraid to hit on female nigs. This scores you points with male and female nigs, as long as she doesn't have a boyfriend. Jokingly check them out, give their ass a double-take, anything. It's humorous and bonding.

if you find someone really annoying, say a co-worker or anyone else that you are forced to deal with but don't want to, kill them with kindness.

smile! act like you are their best buddy... it'll change the dynamic dramatically, and they'll never know. you might stop hating them, too.

>>4748654

5. Don't talk about politics. Insulting the government is fine however.

6. Talking shit to them like you do with your white bros is cool. Say it with a smile on your face just so they know you're bullshitting.

7. Don't be intimidated. I was hanging out once and this black guy I didn't know saw me looking at him (I think I was anyway, he might've just walked up to me for no reason) and said something like "What the fuck you starin' at?"
and I said "I'm looking at you, motherfucker." He and his friend kinda laughed and we brofisted. Don't let them intimidate you, don't show fear, you'll become the butt of jokes for being a pussy. They'll only respect you for having balls, it's all about respect.

8. Refer to male nigs as "bro." This is a mostly black thing and will give you the appearance of being well-versed in nig culture.

That's about it, I'll add more if I think of it.

Freeze your fruits, butter, and etc.

Better yet, just invest in a freezer.

NOTHING WILL GO WRONG

>>4747640
>>4747898

Dear me! My original comment was unoriginal so now it has this new and improved originality module in place!

1. Don't post anything someone else has said, ever.
2. Don't try to evade the filter by adding garbage to your post.

Where in the rules of /r9k/ does it say I have to stay on topic? Or adhere to YOUR rules of a thread?

That's my tip, by the way: DON'T BE A PRETENTIOUS FAG, unless you are always right. And another pro tip for you: YOU ARE NEVER ALWAYS RIGHT.

Your face probably isn't as crooked looking to others as it is to you when you look in a double mirror or see a picture/video of yourself.

-When exiting the shower, squeegee (sp?) the glass to prevent watermarks forming as it dries.

-Iron work trousers/pants inside out so they don't get all shiny over time. This goes for drying them in the sun too, the sun can bleach the fabric.

-Use baking soda on your teeth for effective whitening.

>>4748748

Damn, you 420fags ARE slow. I'm guessing you're new to the internet, and/or mentally retarded, but common forum etiquette is to post on topic. That's why we have topics in the first place. If we wanted rambling off-topic retarded bullshit, we wouldn't have threads. I know it must be difficult for you if things aren't spelt out in black and white, but a lot of the "rules" are not written (as they are in real life).

If you want to talk about weed, post your own thread. Protip: It's also considered bad manners to bump your own topic, so please just let it rocket to page 10.

>>4748839
>>4748748
don't be like those niggas right there.

Put a glass of water in the microwave and cook it for a few minutes. This steams any stubborn burnt in stains and they should now wipe off easily with a bit of spray and a cloth.

>>4748839
that was an appropriate post, bro
Start following his advice about being an elitist cocksucker.

Hobo meal tip:

Wonderbread and Peanut Butter can make for a cheap and extremely filling meal. Scoop out a lump of peanut butter and drop it in the middle of a piece of bread, wrap up and roll the bread/PB into a ball, then eat, repeat until full. It's extremely cheap, and due to the thick nature, it will full you up for hours and prevent feelings of hunger for much longer.

Useful for when travelling or backpacking on a tight budget, stops you having to buy food or stop for food as frequently.

Where in the the OP did it say WET shoes? Of course if you put wet shoes in the freezer, they are still going to be wet when they thaw. OP said SMELLY shoes.

Use what is dominant in a culture to change it quickly

How to be an explorer of the world

avoid freezing food unless you really have to, don't make a dinner in advance because you're lazy. It tastes like shit.

start the day out with a shower, it'll wake you up.

Given the chance between the bus/car and the bike, take the bike, its great exercise and feels fucking great.

if you have the money, buy the game instead of pirating, the company wont get any money and without any money you wont get any new games... its shooting yourself in the foot.

Learn to play an instrument, girls dig it and it'll be a great conversation topic.

A continuation of exploration

Listen to this
<------------

You're worth a damn, act like it

Act nice but don't suppress your anger

The best way to kick a soft drink habit is by replacing it with another drink. I replaced mine with tea. It's less acidic (good for teeth) has more caffeine (good to help replace one addiction with another) and the there's pretty much no calories, no sugar, and none of that other stuff we should try limit in our diets. Plus many teas have been linked to various health benefits (ginseng tea helps prevent ED, for example).

A little Swiss Army knife is useful to have around. Although you may not need it on a daily basis you never know when you may need it to do mundane tasks. I've used my knife as a screwdriver on occasions.

Get rid of your old video games. Have a SNES and a lot games? Sell them or give them away and buy a cheap USB controller.

Pick your battles.
Some shit is unimportant and not worth arguing about, if your boss/gf/bf/parents/professor/whatever says to do it, most of the time you will be better off if you do it to the best of your ability and don't bitch about it.
Don't suck up, but don't be a whiner. Be competent and cooperative and you will do well, particularly at work.

>>4747395

Fuck burning bridges

BLOW THAT SHIT UP

>>4748063

>If, in a social situation, the group clearly believes something retarded, do not correct them unless you have jokes prepared for when you do. Example: A group of my history classmates were talking about how Napolean was a midget. I told them he was actually average height, and the British made the shortness thing up. They ignored me and I had to leave the conversation to end the awkwardness. Correcting people is a huge buzzkill, but if you can joke about it you appear knowledgeable while keeping the conversation alive.

I don't know how long it took me to learn this but I agree 100%.

Just start exercising dude. I know a lot of people are saying it, but that's because it's true. Start out slow and work your way up. Feels good man

Don't buy preprocessed food, make your own easy dishes instead and buy some fruit and vegetables. Eat that shit everyday.

And as one said before me, drink a glass of water when u wake up. Takes most of the bad breath away and just is good for you.

1. Good meal idea...buy a precooked rotisserie chicken, hamburger buns, and a bottle of BBQ sauce (I like Jack Daniels, personally). Use a fork to shred the meat off the chicken, put it in a ziplock bag, add the whole bottle of BBQ sauce. Let it sit overnight to soak the flavor, then eat whenever. For a total of $8-10, you can get four or five meals out of it easily.

2. Eat breakfast every day. Try starting it with a smoothie. 1 cup orange juice, 1/2 cup nonfat plain yogurt, 1 banana, 1 cup of whatever fruit (blueberries, strawberries, mango, pineapple, etc), 1 scoop whey protein powder. Blend together. It's light, filling and delicious.

Chop the fruit up and keep it in the freezer...they will keep longer, and the smoothie will be colder and thicker.

3. Stop worrying about women/men, it's only holding you back. "If you chase them, they will run." If you let go of that and just live your life, you will find yourself much happier...it will come sooner or later, when you least expect it.

4. Work out at least 4-5 times per week. It will relieve stress, help you go to sleep, and obviously give great health benefits. It will also boost your confidence, especially with weight training, which makes you more attractive to women.

5. Never go grocery shopping when hungry. You will buy way too much, and often unhealthy foods.

1. Learn where the state trooper headquarters are located on the highways you frequent. You'll be amazed how often there will be a cop sitting RIGHT by that exit.

2. Take 1-2 showers a day, brush your teeth at least twice a day, only wear clean clothes, and wash your sheets regularly. You'll feel much better if you're clean.

3. Read philosophy to help your mental outlook on life. I personally recommend the existentialists (Nietzsche, Kieregaard, Heidegger, Camus, etc), but you should find whatever fits you best.

4. Drink more water! There are so many benefits.

5. Eat Sun Chips instead of Doritos. Drink Coke Zero, Vault Max, etc instead of the full-sugar pops.

ITT:
All the things Mom told you and you ignored until now.

>>4749386
>>Drink Coke Zero, Vault Max, etc instead of the full-sugar pops.

Don't do this. The artificial sweeteners used are shit for your body, and can actually make you gain weight

IF YOU ARE MAKING A CAKE WITH NUTS SUCH AS WALNUTS, PEANUTS, OR PECANS IN THE CAKE

PUT THE NUTS IN A BAG WITH SOME FLOUR AND SHAKE SO THE NUTS ARE COVERED IN FLOUR

THEN PUT THE NUTS IN THE CAKE BATTER

THIS PREVENTS THE NUTS FROM SINKING TO THE BOTTOM OF THE BATTER AND THUS KEEPS AN EVEN MIXTURE OF NUTS THROUGHOUT THE CAKE

Carry a pen and a piece of paper (or a small notebook) with you all of the time. You never know when you need to sign a check or jot down some notes (or a hot girl's phone number).

A friend of mine who is a naval officer was called out by John McCain once because he didn't have a pen on him. Don't let this happen to you!

>>4749472
This is a lie.

If the only change you make to your diet is substituting diet soda where you used to drink regular soda, you will lose weight. Absolutely no arguments. This is iron truth. So why do people who drink diet soda get fat? Because diet soda is NOT the only change they make. They start adding fattening foods to their diet thinking it's okay because "well, I saved so many calories on soda!"

Clean your bong regularly!
Pic Related - It's a Clean Bong
The smoke tastes better and is generally a good idea.

Use hot, hot water and throw in some rice and detergent. Use a bottle brush as well as swirl about etc etc, the rice helps as an abrasive to release stuck on bits.
Rinse and empty.
Throw in some baking soda and leave for a couple of hours - it absorbs the bad smells and oils.
Rinse and empty.

Smoke and enjoy!

>>4749472
True. I drank diet pepsi a shit ton throughout high school/early college and I developed a horrible allergy to the fake sweetener which makes me PISS BLOOD.

Just replace soda with tea, and sparkling water. You'd be surprised how much the carbonation makes it seem like soda.

My tip...hm...girls: buy feminine cloths, the individual ones by Always are very awesome because they fit discreetly in your pocket/purse. You never know when sex could happen, and you don't want bad vag for it.

For men: Don't wear Tap Out shirts. It is slowly becoming common law amongst females not to date guys who wear Tap Out shirts.

>>4749612

People actually wear Tap Out shirts?

>>4749612
google phenylalanine.

It is the protein that aspartame metabolises into. Many people aren't able to metabolise phenylalanine (hence the pissing blood).
This is why anything with aspartame in it has to state "*contains phenylalanine".

Some people also claim that exposure to higher than naturally occuring levels of phenylalanine is linked to alzheimers.

>>4749671
I have a T shirt from the Militech gym, is this bad?

Never complain. Complaining only makes you feel worse about the situation you're in. No girlfriend; who cares? No job; keep looking. Either accept the shit you have to put up with or do something about it to improve your life (btw, I'm one of the people who just put with his crap, and I'm enjoying life in my own way).

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

You should not confuse your career with your life.

Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

Never lick a steak knife.

The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

A person, who is nice to you, but rude to a waiter, is not a nice person (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

Your friends love you anyway.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

>>4749612
What the fuck is a "Tap-Out shirt"?

my tip for girls:

cook your bf a wiener schnitzel so he don't have to pay for food

Smile and offer to help people if they look like they need it, regardless of what they or you look like.

Hug people, you all feel better.

Get a job, you meet people and earn money.

Dress to impress, you feel better and people's opinions of you change

Don't let fear stop you from ever doing anything, it will always end up better than living in your basement

>>4749885
>Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Ok so I was nodding my head to some of those and then BAM :/

If you touch something hot with your fingers grab your earlobe right away, the cartilage absorbs the heat than letting it air cool.

Work smart, not hard.

m0otleblax

Dave Ramsey here -

>Open a bank account, put a hundred dollars in it

I always advocate that you should at least put $1k in your Emergency Fund. It's the first step to financial peace.

Cocktail napkins that stick to your glass. Truly a first world problem. If you need tips to solve this "problem" you should probably donate everything you have to charity and then kill yourself.

start up a savings account, and when you get a decent job put $200 into it each month. cut back on your fun money and do it. never spend money from this account. just keep doing it. pretend it's a bill or part of the rent or something. keep this up well into your 30s and 40s.

by the time you're 50~60 you'll be a millionaire.

Alcohol mixed with lemon/lime juice (and I mean, squeezed from the fruit) makes for very good deodorant.

DON'T FAIL YOUR EXAMS
FUCKING DON'T FAIL THEM
take EVERY STEP to making sure you don't fuck up. if it's revising those extra few hours, pleading for a sick note, don't fucking fail. you need those grades, and resitting costs MONEY and TIME.

i failed last semester's exam, i didn't get kicked out but i could have been. now i have to pay 200GBP (400ish dollars i guess) for the resit and can't make that money back over summer because i need the TIME to resit the fucking EXAM. so goodbye cash when this could've been easily prevented.

ALSO don't forget, when you have the same tutors for longer than a year, your impression will be left on them, so if you slack off they won't change their mind about you for the rest of that course. especially when they mark your work.

>>4749885

wow, the Ark...are you an idiot...it is a story friendo.

You don't have to shop for clothes very often but when you do take your time. You'll be stuck with those clothes for a long time and they ARE important.

Most of this thread is stolen from http://members.optusnet.com.au/argyle85/index.html
So go there instead

ska music will make you feel happier. seriously, listen to that shit sometime.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBNy3l3Me5o

seriously listen to this and try not to dance. just won't happen

- Do not use the same online handle for everything. Same for passwords.
- Be polite, Be efficient, and have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

>>4747201
Counter Tips:
>When you're given a cocktail napkin or coaster with an excessively wet drink (condensation), sprinkle salt on it. It will cease to lift up with your drink.
Will make you look awkward.
>Get hold of an army ration pack and keep it in your house / car. Especially useful in cold climates.
Will make you look paranoid.
>If you need to leave your car in an area where you think it might get stolen, remove some small but vital part like the fuse for the fuel pump.
Gets your hands dirty. Also, better tip: don't leave it in that area at all, walk a mile you fat fuck.
>Even though you may be nervous about talking to random people, the worst you can get is "Go away."
Or they might laugh in your face. Destroying your confidence forever.
>Open a bank account, put a hundred dollars in it. Then put the atm card in a box somewhere. Having a hundred dollars that no one knows about could save your life.
Or just take a 100 dollar bill and put it in a box. Good thinking, huh?
>You can throw clothes in the dryer for about 5 minutes or so to get wrinkles out.
This only works on certain fabrics, which tend to be pretty much wrinkle-free most of the time anyway. If they're not you've been wearing that shirt too long and should put it in the washer, not the dryer.
>Put smelly shoes in a plastic bag and put it in the freezer overnight. The smell is caused by bacteria, which will die when deep frozen.
And have the smell come back in a few days. Better: buy proper shoes that aren't made of plastic.
>Use lighter fluid to remove sticky stuff from price labels etc.
Don't mind the smell though.

The rest is decent.

>>4750314
Not OP, but the point of the ATM is that you'll pretty much always have access to an ATM. You won't always be around that box. Also, having it in an ATM relieves temptation to go spend it on pointless crap.

>>4750349
Yeah, but you're going to get the card from the box anyway, fuck, am I making sense here?

Don't eat pop rocks and then drink soda.

Don't talk about fight club

and whatever you do, don't fucking feed your Gremlin after midnight

>>4747336
>>4747418

I got it. Gimme a sec... Actually, what's the best way to get the Lockpick manual out? Emails?

>>4750314
Counter-Counter Tips:
>Will make you look akward
Will also make you sound intelligent when you explain to your curious acquaintances the science behind your action.
>Will make you look paranoid
PROTIP: Having it =/= showing it to everyone who comes in your house or having it on open display
>Or just take a 100 dollar bill and put it in a box. Good thinking, huh?
Terrible thinking. You gain interest on the money in the bank while that piece of paper loses value due to inflation. Better yet, another idea would be to invest in a U.S Savings Bond.

http://www.capricorn.org/~akira/home/lockpick/

here's a good lockpicking guide

if you're serious about it, go to the southord website. there you can buy a cheap set of lockpicks along with a beginner's guide.

>>4750412
also i want to point out that as fun and cool as lockpicking is, it's a skill you'll very rarely ever use.