How's the smell, bro?

So you bathe instead? Do you like bubblebaths or not?

inb4 people gush and blather about OP going so long
protip- once you get past the first week, it really doesn't get any worse

>>384784

I wash my clothes regularly and sponge my pits/crotch every once in a while, so it's not too bad. Also I wear deodorant and cologne.

>>384788

God no.

do you give yourself a spic bath? take a soapy wash cloth and rub down the essentials?

>>384802
>>384807
never mind you posted it while i was typing the question.

I've gone about a year without showering before but i still had to whore bath my hair and crotch

do you have to wash your hair at all
are you greasy
what is the hair situation

OP, just shower, that's just awful
Why don't you shower?

1. Lick your fingers.
2. Start rubbing the inside of your underarms violently.

Post results.

>>384813

I don't wash my hair, no. I keep it really short, though, like buzz cut short.

>>384822
>inside
Wait. What's that called in English? Did I use the correct word? You know, the side that's connected to the palm of your hand, not the backside of your hand.

How have people reacted?
And do you hate water or something, OP?

>I'm legitimately interested in this topic

>>384821

I have an extreme case of claustrophobia and an equally extreme phobia of drowning. You can see how these combine to make it so showers are basically my Room 101.

why

lazy?
hate water?
worst thing to do in the morning?

If this thread were "smell-o-vision" applicable, how many people would now be unconscious?

>>384821
you shut up you hot water loving probably has electricity can-shower-in-the-winter fancy man.

>>384845
>>384860

People tend to keep their distance from me. I can't pretend that it's not because I stink. My boss at my previous job once took me aside and told me that others had complained of my smell too.

I can't say I'm proud of this. I have tried several times to take a shower, but the prospect of any type of bathing basically makes me have a panic attack. Just sponging myself off makes me tense.

>>384847
Why isn't a sponge bath out of the question?

Ever try a benzo or something? You should really get a hold of some kind of drug if you can't even bathe.

>>384903

I sponge myself off about once a week.

>>384894
That's just sad. Don't mean pathetic, but genuinely sad.
OP you should really consult someone. Smell is very very important, people don't realize it anymore but a big part of whether you're attracted to someone or whether you like being around someone has to do with the way they smell.

In the meantime, isn't there some kind of semi-solution? If you dare to swim, do that in the morning? It's a big space and there are people watching you, you don't drown that fast, they would notice it immediately if something went wrong.

>>384894

Have you thought about getting therapy for it? If you could clean yourself without enclosing yourself in a small space and without the risk of drowning, would you do it?

in order to overcome your fear of drowning, you should lay back on a board and have someone hold you down while a wet rag is draped over your face and mouth

>>384911
Do you scrub at all? Or use any deodorizing products? Surely you wear clean clothes... I can't imagine you being too bad if you can manage to have a sponge bath. But seriously, OP, you really should get yourself a shrink or something. Someone to talk to who understands you and gives you benzos can really help you get your shit together.

Are you a virgin?

Fsgufhu

>>384928

I would never, ever swim in any body of water, even a kiddie pool. Just thinking about it gives me cold chills.

>>384930

I clean myself as best I can without freaking out. I can't even stand to go outside when it rains. I don't know why. But the idea of drowning is my worst fear imaginable. I saw a psychologist once but she wasn't much help, prescribed some antidepressants, they did nothing.

>>384975
>can't even stand to go outside when it rains

Find a better psychologist. It sound like you need one, badly.

>>384975

Sand will get you relatively clean. Not as good as water, but better than nothing at all.

could you psychologically fool yourself by getting some kind of snorkle and goggles, as if that would save you from drowning in the shower?

also, could you just turn the shower on for like three seconds, then when you feel panic setting in, turn it off, and kind of do that in bursts while soaping yourself up?

Protip: OP showers via scrubbing and exfoliating, no water required. Maybe like soap and scrubs and shit. You can probably stay just as fresh as the water hippies

Are you from 18th century France?

>>385008

Honestly, what could a psychologist do for me? No amount of talking will make me not terrified of bathing. Maybe I could drug myself up enough to do it, but I'm already afraid of drowning, why would I drug myself and then put myself in situation where I could drown?

>>385034

The second thing you suggested is basically how I've showered the few times that I've done it. As for the first idea... the goggles, they would do nothing.

>>385072
They could help you see things in perspective, control your fear. Lots of phobias get cured, why would yours be impossible to conquer?

And honestly it doesn't sound like you've got much to lose.

try showering with a hot girl or something. If there's somebody else there, they won't let you drown at all.

>>385072
Give you anti-anxiety drugs.

>>385072
> Maybe I could drug myself up enough to do it, but I'm already afraid of drowning, why would I drug myself and then put myself in situation where I could drown?
DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK YOU CAN ACTUALLY DROWN IN THE FUCKING SHOWER HOW FUCKING STUPID ARE YOU FUCK

>>385179
Not the OP

But you could drown in my shower. The pipes are pretty clogged so when you shower, eventually you are standing in a few cm of water.

Enough to drown in, say, if you passed out from fear or hitting your head on something.

>>385179
Don't be mean to him. He already knows that he's irrational and he's probably extremely frustrated by this. In fact, most people with strange phobias like these are aware of the fact that it makes no sense. OP, I really think maybe just popping a xanax or some simple, light anti-anxiety drug before taking a shower might calm you down enough. You might even be able to get by with some marijuana instead.

>>385179
You do know a phobia is an IRRATIONAL fear, right?

Okay I just posted this in the wrong thread, because I'm the most socially awkward person on /r9k/.
But you should try a big open gym shower with other people.
the water won't pool up at the bottom and other people will be there if something happens.
also less claustrophobic because of size.

I can't judge you though, I have a major foot phobia.

>>384957
what do you think man

>>385072
>No amount of talking will make me not terrified of bathing
Yes it will. That's the point of shrinks, man. Your phobia to you seems permanent and all-consuming or whatever, but shit like that can be cured. See a professional.

How about showering with people? Though if people avoid you due to your smell... That can be difficult.

Do you have many friends?

>>385362
sounds more like you're setting him up for a gay encounter, which, if gone wrong, will make it way worse

>>385422
I'm sure there could be relatives/ justreallyhelpfulcreeps that could help him with this problem..