Work harder you goddamned lazy faggot.

I was such an apathetic cunt.

You're a little overweight. People will eventually like you more when you drop a few pounds. Why not start the process sooner?

I would say...

>Bonus points if it isn't relationship related.

Shit.

Stop wearing baggy clothes, you look ridiculous, and for fucks sake, change your hairstyle, you are a fucking pussy deflector, and when in one year you star watching anime, don't become a total weaboo, just like it in a healthy way

Don't worry, in two years you won't be a loser anymore and it will be awesome. Also, lose the anti-drinking and anti-sex morals you fucking dumbass.

Blow your brains out. I'm in my thirties btw.

I'd offer to beat myself off, knowing I'd comply.

I'm quite the narcissist.


mootblox

>>2910181
Start jogging now instead of in 11th grade.

If you really have to skip eleventh grade at least make sure you don't loose your old friends or make new ones.

What if I am 15 years old now?

START WORKING OUT INSTEAD OF LOSING EVEN MORE WEIGHT TO FIT INTO YOUR FUCKING SKINNY JEANS, YOU FUCKING FAGGOT

also, go to Algebra 2 class, just get that shit over with.

Date the pale, blond girl, instead of the tall, dark-haired one.

Don't start smoking cigarettes! :(

get your fucking blackbelt already and don't give up cause you might have the talent to get to the Olympics.

Don't let Jennifer near the bomb!

Grow your hair out, it looks shit!

Are you aware of how much sex you can be having without consequence? Do it.

>>2910222
Don't skip the eleventh grade, you don't even know how to spell the word "lose," a four letter word children learn in 2nd grade.

Get in a fist fight with Ben.

"Keep your friends close."

Funny how that turned out.

"I'm you, but from the future. And now I'm going to kick your ass for being such a pussy."

>>2910229

You should get banned then

Not much. I've led a very satisfactory life so far.

get a job
stay away from /b/
don't quit hockey
don't quit football
don't take bullshit classes like art
stop touching your goddamn face, it makes the acne worse
run more often
drink more water
stop eating chips
don't break your fucking knee next summer
beat the shit out of James when he starts running towards you, he's about to fuck you up

Buy some college text books and get certified NOW. Fuck high school, and find a job out of state before shit hits the fan.

15... that would be 1998.

"Do it. Pull the trigger. It never gets any better, and nobody will mourn your absence."

DUDE YOU ARE GOING TO GET PUSSY EVENTUALLY

OH GOD ITS SO GREAT.

The cake is a lie. Also, kill your new physics teacher. Just do it, don't ask.

Leave Trun, he's no good for you.
Invest in Google before Gmail comes out
Don't bother with the Wii, Dreamcast, or PS3, they're all a waste of money.

HEY FAGGOT INVEST ALL YOUR ALLOWANCE IN APPLE AND GOOGLE.

DO NOT

I repeat

DO NOT FUCK HER IN 2007.

Get that shit out of your system and THEN marry her when your goddamn ready

Don't take that fucking geography class, the teacher is a fucking moron!

I would get the results of every sports game of the future, so past!me could bet and get rich.

I'd tell myself to take all art and music classes. I'm not sure I could convince my past self to do it though.

Don't stand by the speakers at raves. Trust me your ass is gonna go deaf.

dude, in the future you will travel through time and say to your a year old self dude, in the future you will travel through time and say to your a year old self dude, in the future you will travel through time and say to your a year old self dude, in the future you will travel through time and say to your a year old self dude, in the future you will travel through time and say to your a year old self...

>>2910298

But then you wouldn't exist. Just the future of the past you.

God, you listen to shitty music.

I'd tell myself to lighten up and start enjoying myself. Then I'd hand myself a fucking joint.

It's painful but you are gonna like it

You have no idea how right your are.

Do what you will, regret nothing.

Law is kinda faggoty, computers are more fun.

Don't waste your time grooming yourself for a career as a pastry chef. Take the electronics classes at school, Yes, I know you aren't interested in it now, but you'll fucking love it. If you do it now, you might get a scholarship, or some shit, and that'll ease the burden of loans. Oh, by the way, the economy gets fucked. ENJOY UR DEBT LOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOL

dont do drugs in highschool, you'll end up with a GED.
when you and ***** start talking again, just get back together with him. otherwise he's going to join the marines. then he'll stop talking to you and you will wonder about it forever.
dont get married when youre 22. you'll fucking regret it almost immediately.
Debbies ex Mike is going to win like 19 mil in the lotto. go be friends with him.
dont date *****, he'll just spend your trust fund on drugs. use that trust fund on COLLEGE you stupid fucking bitch, jesus
and get braces.

Don't let that ugly bitch from that shitty town gets near you, you will eventually be in your first and most idiotic relationship ever. Get a part time job, or learn to play an instrument, in 3 or 4 years you'll be thanking me. Shave you mustache, you look like a stupid indigenous south american. Don't stop talking to your online friends! always keep in touch with them, because in 5 years you'll have no one to talk to on msn, and you will miss those awesome persons

people are not going to change 5 years from now, don't sweat it, you will find your way trust me.

Dear self - make as many osama bin laden jokes as you possibly can on september 10, 2001.

get your phisical papers turned in BEFORE fucking tennis season starts (as a result you wont be playing with that shit stain who hits an INCREDIBLY retarded shot out into bum fuck egypt causing you to sprain your ankle.)

also PAY ATTENTION TO GEOMETRY ITS NOT HARD gaah

You are gay, not asexual.

>>2910359
how can rich kids be so goddamn stupid?

Dear self - never go to 4chan.

You'll realize you like MEN at age 17.

Don't worry, you still like women too, and all the women like that you like men and you'll get laid. A lot.

Prepare yourself.

>>2910359

you dumb shit why don't you just send yourself some fucking lotto numbers or some sport results?


inb4 Biff Tannen

What I would have told myself at the start of high school:

Stop the computer games. Stay the fuck away from 4chan and other time-wasters. Work hard, but also socialize. Get some decent sleep.

Because I wish someone had been there to tell me that. My parents certainly didn't care, sadly.

To me, at 15:

Quit the video games and get your education on track ASAP. Live up to your potential and focus on yourself instead of on others.

That's about all I can think of, I want those bonus points for not making it relationshit related.

don't stop playing soccer
don't talk like people in quentin tarantino movies

Invest in Apple and Microsoft when they IPO, or as early as you can. Get out of both by mid 2007 and switch to gold.

1995 - the Braves go to from worst to first, and win the World Series that year - bet accordingly.

2001 - do not go to NY this year (Washington either).

DO NOT MOVE TO YOUR DADS! As much as you hate your mom, don't do it. Try harder in school. You want to be a math teacher. Get on that shit. Take Science courses. Also, look up Lolita on the internet. You will love it. Get facebook. Lurk for him, add him to msn, and go for coffee with him in a few years. Don't do drugs. They looks fun but you will regret it.

Fuck you, you skinny bitch.

Gaze upon your ruined world.

Also, stop being a pussy and just fuck her. Why are you such a pussy? Thanks a lot, you fuck. Now I'm a virgin.

>>2910448
Also. Don't just date whoever. Save yourself. Hate whores.

never start dating online.
do some squatz

Dear self, seriously, life isn't that bad, I know being hit by a car fucked you up something good but really, the fact that everyone dies isn't terrible. Buy The Myth of Sisyphus and realize that the only one that gives your life meaning is you, and you're worth giving it a good one.

Also, stay the fuck away from the interwebs, I know Command and Conquer and Doom look awesome, but you'll shit up your high school days.

Get into shape, I know your sister was a ruinous bitch but women are amazing to hold, and it's much easier when you're decent looking.

Also, when Adam stops dressing like a faggot, don't be a douche and stop hanging out with him, take a goddamn hint and do the same. You aren't selling out, you're coming to the realization later that it doesn't matter a good goddamn how someone dresses or what kind of music they listen to. Senior year you'll realize that some of the cooler people on campus were guys you spent freshman through junior year hating on for no damn reason.

Never join Maple Story

Transfer all your courses to uni prep

Don't blow all your cash on vidya, care about your appearance too you lazy fuck

LOSE WEIGHT
DONT STOP BEING HONEST
MARRY MIKE, DONT LET IT JUST END BECUASE OF UNIVERSITY
BE A PSYCHIATRIST YOU FUCKING WHORE BECAUSE PSYCHOLOGY IS FUN BUT YOU WILL GO NO WHERE, PSYCHIATRISTS GET MONEY

hold onto your friends
stay away from 4chan
pursue things with jon
get your fucking act together and stop being a lame, self-loathing douchebag

Get into shape and stop being such a pussy.

"Dude, lets get drunk!"

Oh, and "Stop being a horrendous faggot. Become a recluse, and hate society."

Steal cash, invest in *specific stocks to have great short term investment returns*.

Start doing light drugs soon. It suits your personality.

- Drop out of school
- Hit the road

Help out around the house more. You're gonna get kicked out. Try to be nice to stepdad. You really don't have a great relationship and he feels threatened by you. If you lay off and stop being a bitch, he'll be nicer. Get better grades in school and make more friends. Alisha is gonna bale on you after high school. She's not a good friend. Go to homecoming and prom. Don't give Alan your phone number, but be nice to him. Don't date him though. He turns into a douche later. There's this guy that you're going to meet in college. He's the one. Don't break up with him. Don't listen to Lindsey. She's a nutcase. Don't skip classes in college. Get better grades. Don't be afraid to talk to people. Don't stop writing or keeping a journal. You're talented. Read more classics and forget about that shitty christian fiction you're into. Be nice to mom. She's a great mother and doesn't deserve your shit. Be nice to Danny. Don't get mad at him when he moves out. I know it seems like a bad decision, but it works out okay. Don't fuck the first guy who gets you drunk. Don't fuck any guys until college. NEVER CONSENT TO SEX WITHOUT A CONDOM. I KNOW HE SAID HE WOULD PULL OUT. DON'T BELIEVE HIM. HE SLEPT WITH EVERYONE IN TOWN.

DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE DOING RIGHT NOW.

You are a fucking idiot. Go fall off a bridge over the lake.(I can't swim)

1.Stop hanging out with niggers.
2.Do not have sex with Cherie.
3.Start learning Japanese.
4.Save money.
5.Get better at math.
6.Learn to draw.

Dear god, hang out with Julie earlier. That way you'll meet Mary quicker and neither of you will be miserable through high school.

Also, even though you don't like parties. The vidya isn't the answer.

1. Stop pretending your a communist you stupid fuck.
2. Take more math and learn to like it.
3. Smoke weed on the weekends, its cool.
4. I would consider suicide because you still suck at getting girls.
5. Don't go to the private liberal-arts college that you get accepted to, you meet good friends but everyone is stupid as fuck.

Start drinking, it's fun.
Don't go out of your way for sex, it's alright, but not that great.
NEVER START SMOKING.
Call people up when you want to hang out, don't wait for them to call you.
Start conversations with random people, it'll suck at first but will help in the long run.
Get more involved in music.

Also, I'd fuck me. A lot.

become a brewing science major

>>2910601

Also, don't cash your savings bond for that shitty christian college. Not only is it a giant waste of money, it's traumatic too. You will always carry a grudge for christians after that. You can use that money later to get married or buy a house, stupid. FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKK
Why did I do that????

How's two years in the future? Are there any flying cars?

stop being a lazy sack of shit and get off your ass when someone tells you to do something. study harder, spend more time with dad even if you don't like it, and work on your personality you douchebag.

also if you happen to get a girlfriend, don't get all butthurt when she says we're through. take it like a man and don't listen to linkin park you big faggot.

God damn it, you should totally take naked pictures of yourself right now, so that I can post them when I turn 18 on the internet, just to see if having nude pictures of myself on my computer would be considered illegal.

Shave. Holy balls, shave and get braces RIGHT FUCKING NOW

start skateboarding now, and cut your hair you hippie faggot, or it's gonna make you go bald by the time you're 20

although the the obvious would be don't wait until your 20s to go to college and then waste time you should be studying on 4chan, okay, i'll go for the bonus points - go out with her friend and stop holding out for her.

dude, chill out. everyone hates you right now and you're the laughing stock of the school, but in about a year and a half, you'll cut your hair, miraculously lose all the acne, and the working out will show. over the course of a month you're gonna go from bottom rung to stealing the footballers' chicks daily.

oh, but when cherie gives you the eye, go to the stairwell, not the women's bathroom. you'll have forgotten that you were supposed meet jen there.

also, enjoy the highschool & college pussy while it lasts, after those two phases, you're gonna be too busy doing random adventurous stuff to fuck random chicks all the time. you get to live on a yacht for two years btw, it's gonna be sweet.

>>2910902
oh, and the semi-tight black jeans? they will never fail you. sure everyone can see your dick, but that's gonna end up being a plus.

Lose weight, brush your teeth, and STOP MASTURBATING SO MUCH.

1) Don't give that douchebag another cent.
2) From now on, not another word about your intentions.
3) Store your jing, god knows, you'll need it in the future.

Expand your music theory (reading, rhythm, etc).
Cut out the goth shit.
Start exercising and eating better. You're not fat, but you'll feel much better.
Don't give your current friends so much credit.
Read more.

Oh yeah, stay away from the internet.

>>2910902
>Cherie

Dude, are you me?

>>2910616

>>2910902

Holy fuck your life sounds incredible.

Lose weight now, you look good under that fat. In college tons of girls want to fuck you, why not make it so in high school?

Your life sucks just as much 8 years from now.

idk i haven't changed all that much in a year

Kill as many people as possible.

>>2910948
you don't live in colorado do you?

>>2910276
"September 11, 2001 involves the Twin Towers and some planes. Buy aircraft stocks and buy them now. Don't forget - the sell-by date is September 11, 2001."

No sleeping pills
Read scientific journals
Run

>>2910672
HOLY SHIT..

are you me? i mean, srsly, we're living the same fucking life.

you are doing good with your findings. keep going. remain patient and accepting. keep taking care of your body.

do not go through a "drunk stage" even if you think its necessary. people will still be boring, and you'll just end up embarrassing yourself. do not remain in uncomfortable situations because you think they will "get better". do not openly and outwardly talk of disgusting things, this scares people. do not force yourself to hang around people that make you uncomfortable, listen to your instincts. do not gossip, do not humiliate yourself in order to get reactions.

people will come back into your life. do not cling to them. remember why they were drawn to you in the first place. worry not.

figure out that being loud and crude isn't a good cover-up for insecurity. you deserve a lot better than what i have done. you could have been so much more than this, and maybe still can be, depending. hopefully i will receive information from my future self instructing me what to do.

Don't worry, you are going to break up with her and be fine with it. Keep Randy on pot and beers only. You are going to get laid, but first you have to deal with a crazy bitch. Oh, and drink some fuckin beer.

have sex with her and don't work at domino's. also, don't go to college you got into... just go to the jc. also, don't be afraid to propose to your next long term girlfriend. she'll say yes.

also, you should have stuck with grad school and not med school. :(

>>2910181
buy some fucking euros and sell them by april of last year. would have made shit loads o cash

Stop playing so much vidya games.

Dress differently.

Start dancing to shitty electronic music.

Buy drums. Any kind.

Buy weights and fat up skinny.

Get lenses and get that maul off your face.

Your instinct is right. She digs you. Go for it NOW and lose your virginity two years ahead of schedule. Good lord, you may not think you're interested in sex but it rocks.

>>2910997

No, I'm a New Yorker. That would've been some awkward stuff though lol.

Work a bit harder in school, especially chemistry.

Come out to your parents as a transsexual right the fuck now instead of waiting five more years. Life would have been so much easier if I started hormone therapy seven years ago instead of two years ago.

Ah well, life is still good.

>>2910941
And don't draw JUST the anime bullshit. A little is fine, but you're wasting your talent.

LEARN EVERYTHING YOU CAN IN HIGH SCHOOL YOU FAGGOT. YES IT'S COOL THAT YOU DON'T DO HOMEWORK EVER AND STILL GET B- IN ADVANCE PLACEMENT CLASSES. BUT YOU COULD BE BETTER, FUCK.

Dude in two years you're gonna stop caring and become and acid dropping hippy. Drop the goth act and stop acting like a faggot.

Don't take yourself so damn seriously. People like you. Relax.

"Kill yourself before college."

You know what? Furries aren't cool, and none of them will appreciate your art unless you draw dogcocks (which you will never, ever do.) So stop wasting your time and develop your own style.

Oh, and you don't love him. Yet. So stop letting it distract you.

dude, dont stay here just cuz you think your friends are. go to fucking florida and enroll in full sail with mark. shit sucks here and your gonna lose james and rudy as a friend and be forced into a terrible relationshit with this fat hispanic girl who's gonna suck away all of your friends, your brother's respect and eight months of your life before you finally wise up and leave her ass. Your also going to get into a non violent crash, but still end up totalling your car, AND get fired from your job and remain jobless and dependent on your parents for what looks to be quite a long time.

and thats only year one out of high school, kid. Don't even get me started on next year.

>>2910254

Paul?

You're a fat cunt right now, but your weight will fly off magically in a year or two. Also, quit skipping school you lazy fuck.

Don't play World of Warcraft! IT WILL RUIN YOUR LIFE!

go live on res at university, and go somewhere far away.

Start masturbating
lose a few pounds
get a job

Actually work on that religion assignment about Moses, it won't be such a drag on your average and you'll get honor roll. Also screw bonus points, after you watch that movie she does like you after that point. Be a man and ask her out on real dates.

STAY IN SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

Don't be afraid to ask girls out at school. You may be surprised.

Your films will suck. Sorry dude.

Your heart is going to be broken in college, but I don't know yet how it's going to be healed.

Stop farting bare-assed in people's cereal. Turns out they fap to it.

- It's good to exercise but you should get your hands on a scale so that you have a more realistic idea as to how thin you actually are before anything bad happens to you.
- Mom secretly resents we were ever born. She will have a mental breakdown in a few years. This is why she ignores you but loves M - M has a higher chance of becoming rich or famous. You are the "rebellious" one. Rebellious people don't make money. Hilariously, you will end up richer than any of your siblings. lol
- You draw every day (which is great), but you draw the same thing every day. At this rate it will take you another five years for you to be even decent at drawing. Quit drawing anime.
- You don't have to know everything to belong with the people you admire. It's okay to ask questions.
- Learn to play an instrument.
- You won't believe it now but most men want to fuck you. Not Chris, though. He's gay. Sorry.

Don't have sex with him. He doesn't love you and it won't make him like you any better. Your friends don't know shit. You don't need to have sex to be "mature" and you don't need to have a boyfriend to prove that you're not a lesbian. You know who you are and nobody can tell you otherwise.

Right now, things are hard and you think that what you're doing is the only way to cope but goofing off is just going to make your life harder. Leave that school, ditch those friends because they'll all fuck you over later.

Speaking of friends, you'll meet someone who will seem like friend for life but she's just going to screw you over when she is done playing around with you. I'm not going to say avoid her completely but when you've had your fun, cut her off at the knees and pay more attention to your real friends who really do care about you.

Also, don't let anyone put you down for being smart. You're someone unique with a lot of potential. Too bad if those people aren't. Follow your dreams and do what you want because it's possible. It's definitely possible for you.

>>2910181
Zach, bro. Johnie's dead, she isn't coming back, you have to move on and learn to cope, your parents also aren't getting back together so accept it and learn to cope. Playing WoW is OK, just do it in moderation, you'll meet alot of fun /interesting people including a really gorgeous girl that lives in your town. You're going to meet a girl named Stacey, take it slow, when she says she really likes you and becomes affectionate don't let yourself get vulnerable. Be yourself, don't start taking drugs the upcoming summer. I'd love to say stay away from 4chan but that's how you're going to meet stacey so it's neccesary, gl broski.

>>2910181
Take it easy, your mind will explode if you keep on thinking that way, and then you'll be crazy, and it'll take you 3 years before you can even attempt a social life.
Just relax, and give less of a fuck about high school.
I know you already have strait F's, but, do less.
All shitty high school situations are wondrous opportunities for hilarious shenanigans.
Most of your teachers passed with D's, and for some reason, if you tell them you aren't afraid of their authority, in an apathetic way, they let you do whatever you want.
Chill the fuck out, seriously, just try have a good time.
You can get your GED without studying.

>>2911348
>
Also, don't let anyone put you down for being smart. You're someone unique with a lot of potential. Too bad if those people aren't. Follow your dreams and do what you want because it's possible. It's definitely possible for

BBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWW

Don't get a B this year, it'll only send you on a slippery slope to community college.

Hi. This may sound crazy, but I'm you 5 years in the future.

- Do not talk to Leah anymore. Don't even acknowledge here presence.

- Pay attention in school. Make great grades.

- Stop drinking all that soda. Switch to diet coke.

- Never lie

- Be respectful to your family

- Brush your god damned hair

- Stop being so afraid of the world.

- Stop procrastinating

- Let your friends know you love them

- Enjoy life

Stop growing your hair out, you're gonna look stupid as fuck and you aren't unique; maybe if you do that people won't think you're fucking crazy and girls might be interested in you sooner.

Don't get caught stealing at your first job since your friends will eventually work there too with you and it'll be awesome.

Stop being straight edge, weed and alcohol are fun but do it in moderation.

WoW is alright and you'll meet a great girl from playing it but don't get stupidly addicted and skip out on hanging out with your friends. Some of the best years of your life are coming up and if you miss even a single day you'll regret it.

Start thinking about a career you would really enjoy since if you don't you won't make an effort to figure it out later and you'll be living at home jobless hating yourself.

>>2910199
>>2910248
>>2910298

These

But especially this:

>>2911179
>>2911179
>>2911179

Got me into some fucked up relationship I don't know how to get out of now... and also had some bad anti-social effects on my physical and mental health and damage with relationship to parents which is irreplacable

Lose your weight NOW instead of in 3 years at the end of your high school career, you have potential to be decent looking and get some chicks instead of being 19 years old and only starting to make progress with the ladies. It's basically like starting my teenage years over without High School to meet desperate chicks

Don't date Elena, remain friends.
Get to know Reno better, a great friendship will ensue.
Tseng will always be awesome.

Hm... I guess you can play Ragnarok..

Stop trying, it'll all turn to shit what ever you do.
Start your road towards apathy now instead of some years later and save yourself the wasted effort.
Also, enjoy what's still left of your life while you can.

Kill yourself otherwise you'll turn into me.

Dude, you're gay. It's okay, you don't have to be like James. You can still be a guy and like cock. Chill the fuck out and just be yourself.

You are in Clinical depression! Go see the damn counselor.

Stop being a faggot. You are king of that school, so be happy. If you keep being angry for no reason, you will get expelled, fucking yourself up, and end up in aged care. Old people fucking suck kid

build the paintball gun instead of the computer

Don't fret about your horrible attendance. Your truancy will be a major test of your character, and you'll be stronger for it.

KILL THEM NNNNNOOOOOWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!

Is what i would say to my 15 year old self.

Take all your money and buy the Google IPO when it comes out. Then sell when it hits 700.

Bet on Viewed. Bet FUCKING LOTS on Viewed.

Have a little care for your body lil' motherfucker. I'm having problems now, you know?

FUCK. THESE. THREADS.

They are a waste of space. They do no good and you know it.

don't afraid of anything.
stop feeling guilty.
everybody feels as lost as you. except THAT cunt. and do you know why? because he's a cunt.
DO NOT trust the government.
the mattress tag police will stop hunting for you a few years after you rip the tag off, sooner if i you disappear a couple when they first find you.
be robin hood, not the sheriff of nottingham

you have stomach cancer.

Triple double nigger tits

>>2913344
/r9k/ exists to allow we troubled young minds to vent, thus lightening our load and keeping our cancer from other boards. Would you take that away from us?

- open up a savings account
- dont steal whatever it is you're planning to steal, will scar you for the next 10 years or so
- start saving for a car i want
- study harder
- start losing weight now

Leave her.
Now.
She will hurt you and almost kill you, and she will almost make you kill yourself.
Do sports. Start jogging or something, I don't know. Focus on playing guitar, you'll be in a band when you're 17.
Start listening to Radiohead. NOW.
Get to know Vicky a lot better, you'll thank me for that.

And one last thing.

They are right. She is not good for you, you should leave her as soon as possible.

stop dicking around and study faggot

Keep your head in football, it'll be a helluva career for you if you don't get hurt.

Also, change your diet and spend more time in the weightroom, you already have colleges looking at you that want to get your ass in their schools.

-Work harder in History and English, the 4.0 is worth it.
-Do Tennis in HS.
-Skip pre-calc.
-Talk to grandpa about his life's experiences while you still can.

It's alright.

Tell them about the voices. Just tell them.

You'll be doing them a favor in the long run. They won't waste your saved college money. They get to keep that to get themselves out of debt. Feeding you is then the state's problem. They have even more money.

Get some fucking confidence before you're eighteen.
Don't drink so much. It's not worth it.

Learn Korean, Mandarin or Japanese and you'll fucking love yourself for it.. Hell, a lot of people will fucking love you if you do.

Don't skip that exam, do your fucking work and pass

Learn to play an instrument and fuckin' stick to it

Don't swear so much. You'll seem nicer in the future.

Stop wearing just black.. You'll look like a dumbshit in pictures. Green is a good color on you

Beat the living fuck out of that fag guido if he talks shit. Your boys were around the corner anyway so if shit went down, the ambush was waiting.

Smile better. Seriously.

everyone of your friends is useless, stop talking to them.
quit drinking and driving
dump that whore of a girlfriend you can do much better and will
save money
get drunk more
dont waste 2 years of uni life in arts faculty, just right into business, its easier anyways

When you're older you'll understand what I'm about to do to you. Now strip and bend over, you might feel a little pinch, but that's normal.

>>2913446
oh and I forgot your brother dies in a car crash.

Stop spouting Simpsons quotes and stop being such an arrogant little prick, nobody likes you.

nothing in high school matters other than getting into college

>>2913612
/tg/ is the best board :)

that dreadnought thread was a lot of fun

Grades and education aren't everything in life, go out there and live a little, before it's too late.

-Learn how to swim. Why? Just because.

-Don't take care of his cat. The bitch has fleas and it'll just make your life hell.

-Stop being so nice those people. They're taking advantage of you.

-Stop being nice period. The only person who should matter is you.

-Transfer out of C HS. It's a shitty school and the teachers are dumber than you are.

-Do that program. It'll be good for your future.

-Don't give up your passion because of that idiot. He's just jealous because he's too lazy to find a passion of his own.

"...she kissed my face and said 'love means nothing at all.'
she kissed my face and said 'life means nothing at all'..."

Lock the doors, burn it down.

This thread... Some of you have me wanting to know how you're doing now...

Get off the internet. Dude, GET OFF THE INTERNET.

Especially dont ever go to 4chan.org. ever

Work harder you lazy cunt.

Also, don't get drunk in the park next summer, or you'll end up with a nasty scar on your forehead.
In fact, don't drink that much at all.

dont date bisexual and menatly unstable chicks
get a whore instead

When they make fun of you, punch them in the face.

Sell your computer, you really don't need it.

Deliver your fucking papers on time.

You're moving in a year, so cause as much shit as you can at this school without being expelled.

Love,and look out for your family and friends

Finish school,successfully - Qualifications are essential

Chicks are awesome - have sex with as many of them as you can

Have a hobby,music,sports,art - anything,aslong as you enjoy it,hell son - you might make a living off it one day :)

Disregard racism,sexism and and anykind of bigotry,theyre not important if ypu dont believe in them

And last but not least,respect those who respect you,give everyone a chance - but NEVER be afraid to tell someone to fuck off.

Get off the weed, get a grip on your homework, appreciate your parents, stop making false promises

Don't get batshit crazy over Joel. He'll stop talking to you after you go see in him in California.

Talk to Abe more, it'll work out better for you in the long run.

Stop being a lazy bitch also,

No, no, don't go for the fat depressed one, go for the hot stupid one you idiot, she gets attractive in a few months.

Start working out, you're fucking fat.
Stop giving a fuck what people think, nigger.

Kill that fucker before he gets away.

what's it like in the future?

>>2913344
It's for the underage b&s that we try to ignore, so they have the potential to help someone.

Never join the fucking military. Give the games a break and study. If you can't do that, at least make sure you're ready before you go to college and fuck your GPA up. Homework is not something you can do away with, deal with it. You are not mature for your age, you're just self-inhibited. Building a model city in your backyard does not make you a visionary, it makes you a weird kid. Stop wearing elastic shorts and grow your hair a bit longer. When hot girls hit on you, don't blow them off. They're not trying to hurt you. Invest in Google, Nvidia, and Apple, then sell before 2007. Don't resent your dad, he's just trying to help you. Take a more active part in trying to get a driver's license. Stop gathering random junk in your backyard, you are not mechanically inclined and you will never be on Junkyard Wars.

And don't join the fucking military.

Conversation is not really about the topic, but about hanging out with other people. It's generally done for fun. Loosen up a bit and try it.

Get a summer job. You'll have money and work experience.

You're bisexual and polyamorous.

The reason people bully you is because you're constantly asking for attention. Yes, even now. Dying your hair purple and wearing silly pants doesn't make you "cool", it just makes you stand out more.

No, you're not like X character from Y book/movie/play.

It's okay to say "I dunno" every once in awhile.

STOP. FUCKING. SQUEALING.

who needs a job when it's sunny?

>>2913865
you're not even 15?

You're bisexual with a heavy, heavy preference for women. Get over it.
You're going to be hit on by a lot of guys with no social IQ to speak of. You're not obligated to like them, and leading them on is not "polite."
You're about to be given a second chance with someone that will haunt you for the rest of your life if you fuck it up. Being alone does NOT make you "strong," it makes you a self absorbed cunt.
STUDY. YOU'RE SMART. USE IT.
When you see that girl crying in the bathroom, just hold her. You'll be glad you did and so will she.
Stop thinking according to your moral system and start using some fucking sense.
Fuck the redhead, she's a waste of space and everyone was right about her.

Do not kiss Alice. Do not spend all day reading books about philosophy until you meet Jane, no one know's what the fuck you're talking about except her. Don't fuck Jane. She wants a relationship with you after. Don't fall asleep at David's house while Kara is there. You're attractive as fuck, stop assuming you need bigger muscles.

When you join the military, join the artillery corps. Do become friends with Mike.

Stay away from him, he's going to turn into a fucking stalker.

Lose weight, quit being so fucking creepy, and at least try to build a social network so you won't be stuck in your mother's house on a holiday night when you're 19.

And learn to love cock.

>>2913942
Oh, and befriend that anorexic girl. She's absolutely fucking amazing and you'll regret it forever if you don't. Plus she has good connections for speed.

Cut your fucking hair. What the fuck are you thinking, honestly? I should slap you in the fucking face.

Break up with her soon, she's going to cheat on you and you're going to wrongfully forgive her. You don't love her so stop fooling yourselves.

Shut the fuck up in front of the team. You have to gain their respect first before you act like you're their friend. It's just going to take much longer.

1) buy/loan books from the library on programming and website design - despite the .com bubble bursting the internet is going to be a game-changer and there is money/valuable experience to be made/had if you choose to ride that wave (at the very least continue with your interest in videogames and browse message boards)
2) you are much more intelligent than other kids your age, in fact, you're in the top 5%, but this is not a license to be arrogant
3) prepare yourself for a major depressive episode, you are at high risk
4) it sucks that Jon had to move away, but think of it as an opportunity to learn some social skills and branch out into new groups of friends (this version of yourself still has a lot of trouble with this and it's one of his biggest regrets)
5) ask your dad if you can spend your summers helping him at his lab rather than going to summer camp (they're not the type of people you want to be around and you're not going to make any lasting friends there anyway)
6) other than that, try to enjoy yourself, you're very privileged and you're already on a decent track...

Don't invite the popular girls to pizza for your 16th birthday. They won't show up.

>>2913959
and eat sushi

Don't fucking study Economics A-level, do Physics instead. You're only taking it to please your Dad, and you will fucking hate it.

Don't be afraid of your potential, study medicine at uni.

Lose some weight, and start talking to girls a bit more. Oh, and go out and have some fun occasionally.

Don't play M:TG, it is retarded beyond belief.

Don't worry, it's all going to be ok.

Forget bodybuilding. Move out as soon as possible. Don't trust asian girls.

And FFS keep your money together, fool.

whoah, whoah, hold up. look at you. STOP. DO YOU REALISE HOW MUCH ADDERALL THAT IS? STIMULANTS CAUSE HEART PROBLEMS YOU FUCK. YOU WILL HAVE HEART PROBLEMS IF YOU KEEP DOING THAT. Stop dressing like that, you look retarded... stop wearing so much makeup, seriously. DON'T give the finger to black chicks. FIGHT BACK YOU NIGGER. don't just get beat down in rehab. jesus. fucking pussy, get some spine.

being 15 sucked

get into M:TG now. your really good at it, and you'll only be better if you start now. Go online and buy cards, dont waste money on booster packs. Also there is this girl named kendra, she doesn't like games like you do, she only pretends to because she likes you. Try and be nicer to her because she likes you but cant put up with your retarded bullshit.

I'd ask if I could stick around and then marry myself.

If that isn't game I'd tell myself to get a passion for ANYTHING before I started playing WoW.

Lose about ten pounds, keep it off. Junk food is not your friend, start jogging daily while you live somewhere you can.

Throw out the fucking keyblade, stop wearing sweats, get some fucking cargo pants.

You -are- transgendered. Goddamnit.

Don't post Hikki's picture on 4chan, you'll make an enemy for life.

Stop being a horny little fucker, you're building a reputation goddamnit.

NOBODY IS GOING TO HOLD YOUR FUCKING HAND THROUGH COLLEGE PREPARATION. GET ON THAT SHIT NOW JESUS FUCK THAT IS THE ONE THING I TRULY REGRET NOT DOING WHEN I WAS YOU.

Get piano lessons.

>>2914280
She sounds black. Bring condoms.

>>2914376
Also, play WoW more often, you will lose the chance to fuck a hot nerdy girl because you can't join her high-level raiding guild, and don't be so clingy and creepy with older female friends.

>>2910181
start losing some weight now, its only getting harder if you dont do it nao.

go out and play, do some social activities, try to hook up with a girl like your friend instead of SITTING IN FRONT OF THE FUCKIN TV AND PC ALL THE TIME

get yourf irst kiss before the age of 19 with a whale.

that guy sitting next to you. BEAT HIM TO DEATH he deserves it

Lower your standard a bit now and don't wait for a perfect girlfriend, or you'll only lose your virginity to an ugly fatso while drunk at age of 22.

Dear past me. You dont realise it, and wont until its far too late, but you are the closest Ive come to being consistently and considerably happy. Fuck you, from future me

Dear Me,
Fuck bitches, get money, smoke more weed, you are naturally clever don't spend so much time studying. Maybe play a little sport, become more of a cocky prick people somehow let you get away with it. And fuck some hella bitches, because you end up fucking fatties when you are 21 because you are a nerd.
Hugs and Kisses
Me

Don't hesitate, go ahead and kill yourself. You don't want to live another ten years.

Invest in google, sell in september 23rd 2007.
Relax and have fun. Most of your choices are good ones and you learn from the bad. Sleep with Peta.
Don't bother with Annie though.

Ditch the friends, they back stab.

Eat slightly less pizza and do slightly more work. Or not, I'm not that fat or lazy, so it doesn't matter too much, let's play some video games.

INVEST GOOGLE

Dear young me:
HOLY SHIT, SHUT UP.

>>2910639

>Also, even though you don't like parties.
The vidya isn't the answer.

Woah, that line hit a nerve with me.

What the fuck am i doing? :|
(Not 15 btw. Which makes things even more pathetic)

Bitches won't know 'bout your cock.

Give her up, let her down, hurt her, desert her.

Stay the course. It's been a hell of a trip so far.

Go out and socialise rather than being the basement dweller you are. DO NOT EVER FUCKING PLAY RUNESCAPE. The government will pay for your education so make the most of it, follow this and you might not end up a 23 year old virgin.

you have nothing to worry about, nothing at all.

Loosen up, you little fucking nerd. Sort your hair out.

Those big red lumps won't "just go away" like spots do. Get them looked at, you'll be getting a shitload more of them in a few years.

Once you hit sixth form, be as independent as you can. Get a part time job, learn to cook for yourself. Study harder at History. Drop ICT in the second year instead. John Shaves is an annoying faggot.

You think you can draw now? You can't draw for shit. By the time you do have some drawing skills, you've just left art college jobless and are lost in the middle of a recession. You need to study up right now, so you're at genius level by the time you graduate. Go buy drawing on the Right Side of the Brain. That's a good start.

Or you know what? Just study economics or accounting or something. That's far more useful.

Socialise more. You'll never get laid sitting at home doing nothing.

>>2911008

Holy fucking shit.

Are you the future me?

"Your parents aren't getting back together, eventually your mum will move out of her lesbian bitches place and things will get a bit better. Yes when you're 21 your dad will still be with his bitch gf, suck up to that bitch, cause she ain't going anywhere. Make sure you make BOTH the trips to the hospital for your grandparents, if you wait for the next trip you will miss seeeing both of them when they pass, don't be a lazy fuck. College will be awesome you don't need to do work to pass, drink it the fuck up and slap your brother around the 21st dec 2007. Move off said college after first year it ain't worth staying."

Stop with the drugs, maybe smoke a bowl here and there but thats it.

Try to make friends you incompetent fuck. It's cool now, BUT YOU WILL REGRET IT FOR SOME REASON.

Keep going to totse. Read the drug sections, they're entertaining. Avoid DXM at all costs, it will swallow 2 or 3 years of your life.

TALK TO THAT ONE GIRL. FROM TOTSE. YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW SHES A GIRL, BUT SHE IS. HABEEB IT. GO VISIT HER A LOT. BE HAPPY.

dont worry, things will get better.
just avoid the drugs in a few years.

and that crazy nicole bitch.

I would bring myself a book:

The Game - Neil Strauss

That thing opened my eyes on how dating really works. I would also advice myself on not studying computer science at an elite university. Sure, I will have a master degree in about 6 weeks, but I am so not sure if that was worth the cost. Should have done Linguistics, that interests me at least as much, and that way, I would have gotten much more pussy.

Go get checked for sleep apnea ASAP, and start using the machine the second you get it. You'll see results at the gym once your sleeping gets under control.

Start smoking weed, it will take the edge off.

Don't fuck up....take your medicine, you stupid dickhead. That little thing called 'school' will make a difference on your daily morale in the future...so take it seriously.

My 15 year old self was great. Coolest guy in my class, girls loved me, I was smart, a good musician and sportsman.

My 17 year old self could have learned a lot from him.

you're a lot better than you think you are
fucking ditch all these people you don't even like that you hang around with

They're actually afraid, and they like you, but they have no idea how to express it. Don't think everyone is evil and retarded, try to save at least some people from that idea.

You despicable little cunt, stop being so fucking reckless and lackadaisical. And for fuck's sake, have some decency with the loads of slags you decide to fuck. Stop worrying excessively over how you appear. You will eventually turn into a pathological narcississt as a result, but in the future you will blossom and realize that external superficiality is for dumb cunts. Avoid ingesting shitty drugs such as dramamine, dxm, and lsd it will only make you crazier. And lastly, love yourself. -mootblox-

Ignore amanda when you meet her.

Bonus points btw, its not relationship related, shes a huge cunt/brat/retard

Don't fap so much... and stay away from porn. It will gnaw at your innocent mind and forever pervert sex for you to some degree.

PULL YER SHIT TOGETHER

Go for karolina, she really likes you! atleast when her friends aren't around.
Also and if that doesn't work, go for maria, she has always been interested in you, i know right now she hasn't got tits, but she is kind of a crazy person and will enlarge them when she turn 18, so think about that. Pick a different High School, i know your brother says it's great, but you haven't got the grades to get into a good progam.
Your brother will lose alot of weight, beat him at that and become really buff, don't stop skateboarding, contiune, also start ice-skating in the winter, you are going to need it!
Change your cellphone operator, the current one sucks, and you will stick to it, cause you don't care. Invest money in nintendo, they are shit noe, i know. but they will release a new console called the wii, which will sell like shit. The senators are not going to win the stanley cup, get over it now!

You are a beautiful woman, don't let yourself go. People like you and enjoy being around you, so don't fear them, embrace them.

Don't fuck him, he'll cry like a bitch if you do.

I would give myself the winning lotto numbers for next 5 years, for every 3rd Wednesday of the month. That's the highest payout in the Florida Lotto.

tell myself not to ever go to 4chan.org...ever.

LIFT MORE WEIGHTS SO I CAN BE BUFF

god damn these threads are pathetic, nobody even responds to other people's posts

if you are just writing it down and nobody cares you might as well have written it on word

GRAB YOURSELF BY THE NECK YOU RETARDED PIECE OF SHIT

EVEN I HATE YOU

You'll be fucking awesome in three years from now on.

You should have started a relationship with her, you pussy.

Doesn't matter anymore now though ROCK ON

Ask her out you pussy. Just do it.

When Phil busts out the permanent marker and asks you to help hold her down, and this is very important... DON'T.

in grade 11 fucking drop physics. dont even think about it. stick with biology and chemistry

Don't stay in school; you will be miserable and gain nothing. Travel before university, not during.

Exercise and eat healthy. Everything else will come together perfectly.

Do not move in with roommates. They will screw you over. Go to college sooner.

Even tho you above the avarage you are not so smart as you think you are.

I despise you, and I wish I could hate you to death.

school doesn't matter that much, who gives a fuck. fuck with more people while you can intellectually.

Drop out of school and use your PHP skills to make a Japanese image board website which caters to the particular tastes of people, then place ads everywhere and get thousands in revenue.

calculate how many days alive you have. you need the motivation.

hint, humans life is about 27,000 days long.

be nice to her

Don't grow up to be a whore. Don't cheat on her when you find her. Get out sooner.

I'd have sex with my 15 year old self.

I had acne, but I was still they hottest guy in my boy scout group.

Start complaining about your gender issues. Now.

you get laid! hooyah!
make the most of it because your not getting any for the next 10 years

Get braces, lose some weight, start listening to Debussy and reading Sartre. -Then- kill yourself.

See that dick across the street.His sisters into you.

Fuck her...

id go back and fuck my homie stephen

She still likes you, keep talking to her whenever you see her online. Also, keep working out even when it isn't soccer season.

Work hard, to the point where you eyes bleed and your brain implodes. And then keep working, it's something you'll have to get used to throughout your entire life.

>>2918108

Holy shit, is that you Nick?

"I know you think the guys in the Rugby team are all cocks, but seriously - when they offer you a place on the first team, fucking take it, or you'll end up fat and lonely. Superficial relationships with morons are better than nothing at all, you cunt. DO IT."

HAI GUIZE I'M ONLY 12 WUTS ITS LEIK TO BE 15 LOL

join the soccer team and get in shape you lazy bastard you arent cool just do it

>>2918127
Holy Fuck steve what up nigga!?

When they tell you you'll never go to college with those grades, they're just trying to scare you. Keep skating by with C's and owning those standardized tests. Also, don't go to UW. It looks cool but you'll end up meeting two girls who will rip your heart out, it's too cold and rainy, and your major will suffer massive budget cuts at the hands of Christine McFail Gregoire.

>>2918142
Not much dawg, just lurkin. You know, normal shit.

How about you?

don't dump jennifer
cut your hair
get in shape
STOP LISTENING TO FAGGY MUSIC

>>2918151
ha nice cracka so steve
i want to put it in yo but nigga but idk how

>>2918177

Nigga, you ain't stickin no shit in my butt.

Like seriously, I wouldn't shit right for weeks.

Don't get into MMO games kid, train hard and enlist.
If you won't you will fuckin regreat it and browse /k/ every day.

save your money for nice clothes
listen to pavement

>>2918185
fuck dude the problem is not that but i have come from the past to warn your 15year old self that your going to get raped by the goddamn mutha fuckin machines

work harder in school so you can get in a good fucking college, you lazy asshole.

and go out more so you don't develop weird anxiety problems. :(

>>2918206

HOLY SHIT MORPHEUS WHERE DO I GO OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

I was worse at 10 so I'll do it to my 10-13 year old self.
Stop stealing candy and food you fat bitch, yeah youll lose the 40 pounds later in life but just stop it now. Go for a jog. Stop liking runescape its fucking dumb. Also, the reason your hair is greasy is because you don't wash out the conditioner you idiot. Youll wonder what the fuck is wrong with your parents in a few years. There on drugs, let it happen because you end up moving from new jersey to south California it's fucking awesome and worth it. Start playing guitar earlier. Don't get too obsessive with anime. If you must, just read manga it's slightly less time-consuming. Stop being shy and weird and mean to people. Don't bother with people in your new school though, they're all stupid. Seriously that place is a cesspool of idiots. Study more, and get ADD medication it just gets worse. Get contacts, you fucking need them. The world isn't supposed to be that blurry.

dude listen
look outside the window
turn left
turn right
go forward
stop moving
jack off into your hand
eat it
turn arround again
look at nick with camera
that was the mistake i came back to stop you from doi-
FUCK
that explaines alot in the future O.o

>>2910181
When you're mother starts dragging you into a doctor because you're depressed, stay firm on saying no the the anti-depressants. You're just having an existential crisis (look it up), and you don't need them. Do however, say yes to the adderall. You do have ADD and it will help you quite a bit.

And be sure to start playing the guitar within the next year. When you're 20 you'll join a band (playing bass) and you will have a blast.

>>2918284

GOD DAMNIT NICK, I KNEW YOU WERE JUST TRYING TO GET A VIDEO OF ME JACKING OFF

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

stop cutting, that's fucking retarded.
also, do your goddamn work, you lazy ass. you'll have a much easier time in college with AP credits and shit and you'll feel better about your higher GPA.
and stop having so much sex with your gf. she's leaving eventually, spend quality time with her now rather than looking back and wishing you did.

Stop stressing out. Alopecia isnt all that bad, soon enough you will pull out of it. DONT LISTEN TO PARENTS YOU NOW LOOK LIKE A FUCKING FOOL. Don't give a fuck what people will say.

>>2918319
and later i put it in yo ass man

>>2918337

God damnit, I somehow always knew I was going to get hit by teh raeptrain.

if i gave myself social advice relating to girls, i wouldnt learn until i failed, so itd be a waste.

a good catalyst however, would be to give myself first the link to ladder theory in 9th grade. then all the other main game shits in a zip file.

i would be done reading and testing them by grade ten, and i would be in effect, 3 years ahead of my current self.

however, my life would probably then be different, in terms of who my friends would be, so many other things would probably change too.

interesting.

You are not naturally gifted. Anything you achieve past high school will only come from extensive effort.

He kill them wi' their love. Wi' their love fo' each other. That's how it is, every day, all over the world.

"Fly right and get your shit together. You know that MMO you just got? Play that fucker in moderation, or else it's going to turn you into a shut in for the next 4 years. Keep your first job, it's going to be the best one you have by far, even if you don't realize it now. Save up money, seriously don't spend this shit, you'll thank yourself when you're 19. When 2008 rolls around, you're going to want to call this number. It's the number of your future girlfriend. You're going to want to get to her a little before summer, before she meets him. Use that money you saved up, because shit is going to get pretty economically hard in a bit. With any luck you:
1. Won't be a loser
2. Will have money
3. Will have someone who loves you

Good luck son, and tone down on the masturbation a bit, it kinda killed our first time."

Cheat on her more, its all good shes a total bitch and will end up fucking you over!

P.S graduate HS early and start college sooner

LEANR SOME FUCKIN MATHS, OR YOULL GET YOUR ASS HANDED DOWN TO YOU IN COLLEGE.

Get new friends, start drinking/doing drugs, and don't be so fucking afraid to socialize. You're not a nerd, you just fell in with that crowd and you're too terrified of meeting new people.

>>2910229
Same here...

"Ummm... hi?"

the lottery numbers for the next year

stop fucking your brother.

>>2918545
then you shouldn't be on arcanine

newfags

I'd say: Party hard, get 7 proxies, party harder.
Also lrn 2 fuck. Don't make a fool of yourself.

Things aren't as serious as you think.
Laugh at importance.

Everything's going to be fine. Now hit the gym, starting early won't hurt.

college is important. go to it.

Quit procrastinating or you won't get into the college you want to get into.

Lose a little weight, get clothes that fit, and be more fashionable.

Go out and socialize more, do be afraid to fpirst, and when you like a chick ask her out dam it.

Save your fucken money to get that now not later.

Luis is a bitch, dont bother caring about him.

And don't worry, you aren't growing up to be a loser. You achieved all these things but you took longer than you should have.(and this is true)

I'm probAbly forgetting some stuff but oh well.

At all times, keep a condom with you, you'll be sorry when you dont have one.

Don't stick your dick in the dog's mouth.

>>2913877

Like I said. A waste of space. This is simply a thread where we can mope around and feel sorry for ourselves. For centuries we have given our youth the necessary advice but we never listen. Save your money; Do good in school. We have to experience for ourselves how hot the iron really is. So just shut up and move on.

ALL YOU NEED IS ONE SCHOLARSHIP, DON'T BE SUCH A LAZY MOTHERFUCKER.

>>2913705


Carmel High School in Indiana?

1. There is no god

2. Shave your beard, lose your turban

3. Be yourself, just cause you're South Asian doesn't mean you have to dumb yourself down to be accepted, those white kids are actually smart and fun.

4. Have a beer, try a white Russian, don't over do it.

5. Weed is pretty nice, you don't know what you're missing.

6. Forget MSN, forget social networking websites, put away the Playstation and get out more, just get out of the house more.

7. Buy a guitar, learn it now.

8. Don't be such a douchebag to people, guys think its funny but most women will find you a narcissistic cunt, plus not everyone has read Maddox, so you'll come across as an intolerant asshole.

9. Sex is overrated, don't worry about it too much, but make sure you have enough social connections, otherwise you won't find any. Plus don't be ashamed of her, otherwise you'll have your pride and virginity for a long time.

10. Get a part-time job, it doesn't matter if you're in school or college at the same time.

Had I done these 10 points, I wouldn't be so fucked up right now, I am having some fun and a social life, but I missed out on so much, and I should be having more out of life than what I have right now.

>>2910181
I'd say work out.. I'm not fat now (140, 5'7) but back then i probably weighted about 20 pounds more.

If i worked out when i was 15 i'd be a fucking stuf now

1. When you meet the strawberry blonde, don't.
2. Pay attention to your gut feelings. Especially about Dave. You should already see it coming.
3. Stop with the self-pity. You're a good guy wasting some of the best years of your life.

>>2918933

11. Oh yeah and don't go to university in your home town, it'll fuck up your social life and your parents will be unsympathetic assholes, go as far away as possible.

This point is actually point before point 4 but I forgot it.

>>2918873
I remember Carmel. Everyone at Avon used to hate Carmel because they were rich. And the hell is with all those roundabouts?

read "The Teenage Liberation Handbook: how to quit school and get a real life and education"

how i wish i would have had this book when i was a kid :/

btw, pdf of it here:
http://sharebee.com/a2817a45

1: dont worry so much, it will all be awesome in a few years.

2: kiss her.
She's gay too, and she likes you.

ALSO STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM 4CHAN YOU SKINNY LITTLE CUNT

go fuck yourself!

no really, it's awesome!

It will get better. It will be better than you could ever imagine,

-Don't make an Everquest account-FUCK ALL MMOs, SERIOUSLY
-Don't even think about going to 4chan
-Studying the day before the finals is stupid, and you should feel stupid for thinking that.
-Don't ever mention your bisexuality. It will only alienate the girls you had the hots for.
-Listen to prog now so you can be less of a pretentious fuck later.
-Take more risks
-Don't get arrested for breaking and entering. Shit is not cash.
-Keep wearing your ritana or you will be stereotypical britfag with bad teeth
-Anime/Manga is not worth your time
-Accept invites to parties

There's gotta be tons more, surely. Fuck.

Don't bother with college, you'll get bored of it eventually. Ignore the parents, they will come round when they realise how determined you are. Just learn yourself some musical theory and buy some recording gear. Don't release anything until you know it's the best you can do.

>>2918948
>>2918948
stud* is what i meant

1. fucking do good in school, i know its not that hard and it seems like bullshit now but getting good grades will help your ass out later, comunity college sucks

2. get together with that goth chick, shes crazy, but you'll have sex like a rabbits and get some mad sexxing skills

3. stay with tkd and get in the self defence class, also ask mel about getting a job were she works.

4. dont worry, you look like a handsome man in about 3 years, like i said stick with tkd, it'll get you some mad muscles.

YOU. ARE. NOT. FAT. Just shut the fuck up, eat right, exercise and calm the fuck down about it. Stop worrying. Get some help for those random, violent urges of yours; if you keep suppressing them they'll come out eventually, and everyone's going to pay for it. Get yourself some help, seriously. And keep up the MMA, you're going to become obsessed with it and it won't be a bad thing.

Don't listen to him, go to SCAD

Don't brush her off, she really will kill herself

That's not a mole

GET OFF YOUR FUCKING ASS!!! You had fucking great opportunities to get fit and NOT FAT FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK also get a fucking hair cut, you look like a fucking hippy what the fuck bangs are fucking gay wat the fuck

Your brother's downward spiral has only one possible conclusion. Nothing can be done to slow or stop it. Look away until it's over.

>>2910181
That girl you have a crush on likes you dude, go for it :)

Before she drops out of school pregnant :(((

prevent 9/11 no one will believe you but you must try

>>2919197
I could have written this to myself. ;_;

It was his sled.

Kill yourself, it gets only worse...

1. Stop trying to get with that guy that moved to Colorado. You're about to meet the guy you'll marry in a year. The guy in CO isn't interested in you, he's using you to write his homework assignments.
2. STOP FUCKING CUTTING YOURSELF
3. DO NOT DYE YOUR HAIR

Take as much Calculus and Physics as you can. Get Chemistry out of the way. All the other bullshit like English and Spanish is entirely secondary. Don't even fucking bother with Building Inspection; nobody will ever fucking hire you. That is all.

Don't put on the handcuffs, you lose the key.

Look fatboy, lose that weight, and pass your classes for fuck sake, it'll make shit a hell of a lot easier.

Quit dance, play a sport, and go to community college first so you dont waste so much money on out of state tuition. :|

>>2919081
-Don't ever mention your bisexuality. It will only alienate the girls you had the hots for.
-Take more risks
-Anime/Manga is not worth your time
-Accept invites to parties

:(

why the fuck was I such a dumb faggot?

Start taking St John's Wort now. Don't worry, it will sort everything out. Talk to Lauren. Become her boyfriend and this time don't attack yourself for taking things too slowly, she feels the same way you do. And if the worst comes to the worst, don't tell her you "want to talk tonight" before the band practise. Just hold out and hope something good happens. And Ashley's still single (I think). Go get 'er.

>>2914870

yes. heed my advice little girl.

When the chance presents itself, punch Phil. Punch him so hard you break his fucking face.

don't stick it in the nigger bitch's pooper. srsly

>>2918985
That shoulda been said to me. Sigh.

Ask rayqueal out she totally likes you.

take your psychology courses, youll want to do it later. Dont move to orlando. Katie is good for a fuck, but dont let it go past that. When you go to AWA, try to get with Kim. Spend your money on college and be done in two years, and don't fucking listen to your advisers, they usually dont know shit.


BTW, i was in college and HS at the same time.

>>2910199

Pretty much this + Cut your fucking hair, metalfags don't get any pussy.

Don't move from Florida.
If you do move from Florida, straighten your hair (immediately).
Then, never ever become friends with that bitch. Yeah, you know which one.
Talk to that guy with the long hair and tell him you play guitar.
Then let everything else happen.

Punch her in the tits.

smoke moar weed yo

>>2919338
Can I hear the story behind this? It sounds more interesting than all this "Date this girl, take this class" shit.

stop buying tacky "mod" clothes.

don't shave your eyebrows off.

don't buy so many fuckin' heels, YOU ARE PIGEON TOED AND CANNOT WALK IN THEM

and stop spending hundreds of dollars at MAC....three years from now, you will wear them same colors of makeup every day and they WON'T include neon green, yellow, or orange.

and fucking apply yourself in school, take precalc instread of trig so you can do calc, and take AP english next year instead of honors.

RETARD D:

>>2919338
>>2919565

Looks like someone hasn't watched Citizen Kane. I suggest you go do that.

>>2919575
You sound like you dress very nasty.

* stop talking to G. he'll eventually get annoying and is not worth doubling sophomore year.
*also, the year you're currently in is much cooler than the one below it.
*run away from mom and never do anything she tells you to again. keep the 160,- in your pocket shell cancel the fest anyway. buy a snowboard.

>>2919588
Really? Damn. I was so excited for an interesting story.

when you become friends with kelly in 2 years when you hang out with her after she starts going out with joel kiss her when you're at the park and never freak if she tells you you don't have a chance and don't walk home on the second day of spring break freshman year and let go of kate, that's a pointless effort and you'll gain nothing, always make sure your ipod is out of your pocket before you go in the pool, don't let autumn go meet her mom on the last day of fest she'll have to leave when she gets back and you won't get any don't take intro to computers just go into ap computer science stop playing football it's just stupid smoke weed the first opportunity you get and especially at fest with kelly and i know i said it already but KISS KELLY THE DAY AFTER SHE STARTS GOING OUT WITH JOEL AND IF IT DOESN'T WORK THEN DON'T FREAK OUT SHE'S THE BEST FRIEND YOU'LL EVER HAVE DON'T LET THAT GO

>>2919612

i did some horrible things when i was 15, yeah

but i dress classy now.

date lauren jones. she lives around the block from you, dude. start stealing from the cafeteria at GHS as soon as possible. dont go see tomb raider. dont let aaron date michelle. tell Mike and Erik about Isaac and Joseph.

other than that, we are at a good spot from where i am. OH WAIT: fucking forget about ap classes. and dont bother with san jose state. work full time, save some money up, and go to europe.

>>2914394
hey. >>2914280 here. lol how did you guess.

When you find 4chan, don't tell Mason. Don't tell anyone and leave. Then never come back. Take the fucking academic classes you pussy, you'll only end up taking them in the summer. Get to know Melissa better before you fuck her over. Start hanging out with the cool kids when school starts instead of half-way through the year. Have the party, but don't get drunk at it, trust me, you'll regret the shit out of that. Convince Brett to stay sober and don't piss the summer away.

>>2919681

oh yeah, and start wearing better fitting clothes. ask people at zumiez and shit how clothes fit. stop just wearing volcom. stop playing with fire, everyone gets fucked up. keep skating, but get a mountain bike. a sick one.

>>2919629
also start listening to muse and weezer earlier and don't walk through peoples yards to get to the quarry they'll call the sops on you and it'll be really lame and get your permit as soon as you can and then get your license as soon as you can it will probably drastically change things with kelly

Hey, asshole? Know how you're broken hearted and alone now? NEVER FORGET IT. NEVER trust anyone, especially women, but especially women.
Also, don't try to be a teacher- you had the right idea with the bass guitar.

Move to your own apartment. It's not as hard as your controlfreak father says it is. Just send the documents. You'll get over your depression in no time once you do this.

Learn to ride that bike sitting in your garage, buy a spanish guitar, learn some musical theory, go to buffalo instead of morrisville.

"You should kill yourself. Definitely, really kill your dumb ass."

Don't start smoking cigarettes you fucking retard. Also, later on you'll find out that heavy metal music is the lamest genre known to man.

GET A FUCKING JOB AND YOUR LICENSE YOU RETARD GOD DAMN.

Also, it may seem like a good idea to punch the shit out of you know who so just do it.

FUCKING MAKE A MOVE ON HIM AT FUCKING BAND CAMP YOU RETARDED BITCH.

Learn to swim if you don't then just don't DECIDE TO JUMP INTO THE DEEP END.

Don't get emo, no one likes an attention whore.

Stop being nice, look out for your star player.

Go apeshit on anyone that gives you shit.

If three mexicans you're rooming with at a hotel start messing up all your shit and lock your backpack in the hotel safe and putting a random combination while you were gone then you should beat the shit out of them,
but you rubbed his retainers all over your dick so it's okay.

Don't be a scared little bitch, no one is going to rape you.

If you are jacking off in front of your friends and he changes the channel on the tv to some workout infomercial, just stop jacking off or else people will think you were masturbating to workout videos.

-grades don't matter.
-learn about Diploma Plus.
-pass as many classes as you can, even if it means failing others.
-get your driver's license as soon as you can.
-let Brittney keep the Civic, buy a pickup truck.
-go into business with Jon and Ivan.
-make as much money as possible. work work work.
-steal money if you can, unless it's from friends.
-don't give out any loans.
-don't play so much Halo 2.
-go to sleep earlier.
-tell Margaret.
-don't be friends with Ryan.
-you're wasting your time on Amy.
-ask Keith about his uncle.
-suck it up with your parents.
-stay out of the house as much as possible.
-don't take medications for anything, especially sleep.
-eat healthier and work out. even though you're in good shape, you'll feel better and sleep better.
-you're an asshole. a bloody fucking asshole. be nicer to people..
-you're a good person. you're honest. in the end, everyone comes back to you.
-when you meet her, don't let her go.

When you choose your first duty station, do NOT choose Kane`ohe Bay, Hawaii. I know it sounds weird, but trust me - you don't want to go down that path.

Please study for that psychics exam you have tomorrow, If yuo don't you'll go to summer school, and that shit sucks.

Kill them all, they're plotting against you

>>2919565
I thought it was a funny reference to citizen kane... that would be hilarious if it was.

Advice ? Nah, everything is fine as is. I'll just write something like:

Everything get's better. Don't worry, enjoy the ride.

>>2920179
Oh, also, when you're 18 and you think its a good idea to tell everyone you like girls and guys, WAIT UNTIL YOURE SOBER.

Trust me, shit dosen't turn out right.

In fact, drinking at the rate you do when you're 17 - 18 isn't a good idea. Smoke more pot instead, you'll understand.

Never ever do speed that once. You'll be scattered for days afterwards and it won't even be worth it.

Annnnnnnnd, get into fashion right now instead of when you're 17.

Oh, oh, also, hang on to Kelly. She's way way way more awesome than you think.

-Working in a movie theater is NOT as glamorous as you think it is.
-Keep writing. and drawing. It will be a bitch relearn.
-Save money. Don't waste our cash mom hid from us.
-Take advantage of the insurance dad has while he has it. Get new glasses, a physical, braces, and get a fucking therapist.
-I know its a glitch, but don't correct it. take those classes.
-Keep running.

Quit being fat, stop playing runescape, talk to people, talk more. Read books, you'll realize how stupid you are once you're 18. Pick up the guitar and play. Stop fucking playing runescape, seriously. If Brandon invites you to his parties, go. You may be husky, but girls love a man with confidence.

When a guy offers you clove cigarettes, get him to eat Chinese food with lots of water chestnuts in it.
Trust me.

Get a time machine and go back to tell your 13-year-old self that you should never, ever gone to private school. Shit was/will be terrible.

stop believing in god and dont grow your fucking hair, douche.

Also green day suck and you are not a fucking punk.

>>2920516
What does water chestnuts have anything to do with clove cigarettes?

>>2920516
Elaborate plz.

This actually sounds interesting.

You're not gay, don't bother sucking that guys cock.

Also cut your fucking hair!

>>2920319
>If you are jacking off in front of your friends

wat.

You aren't bad at math. The teachers you have are terrible and are just trying to shove you out of the door.

You also aren't attracted to her, you just don't want your friends to leave you behind by getting girlfriends.

Invest in google.

YOU'RE GAY, GODDAMNIT.

SO STOP CHASING BITCHES WHO'RE ONLY GOING TO TURN YOU DOWN.

ALSO COCKS.

>>2920652

Allergies, deadly ones?

Don't take your primary journal out of the house. Losing it will set you back YEARS.

Stop being such an apathetic fuckall and get the fuck off of the MMORPGs. Start -talking to people-, especially the ones in Economics. People think you're funny, even though you're slightly fucked up in the head. It'd be best if you stayed away from 4chan because that just makes it take much longer for you to be normal. Start talking to Ashley and Jill, don't just appear out of the blue. Also, exercise more, and when Rock Band comes out, fuck Guitar Hero, get that, and play Drums religiously. It's fun and a calorie burner. Oh, and don't take Architecture, it's a waste of time.

It's shit now, but it'll et better, and you'll get a really great boyfriend in the end, so stop worrying about that/

Don't have any sex.

If I told my 15 year old self what my life would be like in 5 years, he might've killed himself.

>>2910181
You can't really "say" a blow job...

Kill him. You want to, and trust me, it's worth it.

It would be impossible for you to give yourself advice by going back in time. If you gave yourself advice and it worked there would be no reason for you to go back in time in the first place.

I would say, "Self, do track down moot and do something traumatic to him so he'll have an irrational aversion to unoriginal 'What would you say to your x-year-old self?' threads and thus would come down upon those who try to post them with an unruly banhammer and institute a bot that instakilled these stupid threads."

>>2920773
why was architecture a waste of time?

Do not watch G Gundam

Pot is cool. trust me.
Your dad is going to die next year... cry now and dont fuck up later.
Haley says no.
Jen says no.
I think Amber says yes if you try her.
Tell Drew that Laura has AIDS and if he doesn't belive you buy him a condom.
Deb is your cousin... Just let Anthony fuck her.
Derek goes to prison (its trippy)
Black President in 08 i know its awhile from now but your going to vote for him just cause he is a nigger.
oh and working with Mike turns out to be bad ass.... start sooner.
Oscar is gay. He tells you in 01. dont freak.
AND MOST FUCKING IMPORTANT OF ALL.
around this time erik will tell you EVERYTHING
about Alex. He really likes her, so dont get involed. BUT THEN Jon will be there. I helped out jon and i got beat up... Just fucking help erik.

stop picking at your zits, you will leave scars

Stop being a pussy. Go to the gym, play your guitar. Be a fucking man, she's a slut. Just do your fucking business.

I promise, asking a girl out is not as hard as you think. Man up and go for it.

Also don't steal that 80 bucks when you think you need it it's not worth it.

>>2920652
Till that point he will seem to be a friend. But very shortly afterward he will...
-hurt his best friend whom you secretly lust after.
-get you hooked on cigarettes and booze, ruining your singing voice.
-start a chain of distrust of those few who you have allowed close to you. You push everyone away and turn into the Crazy Cat Lady too soon.
-steal your closest friend, whom he dosen't even like.
-beat his wife. Repeatedly. She will bear a child into this world who's tiny baby head will never grow any bigger.
-cause you to be looked for by the cops for 2 years.

The fucker is deathly allergic to water chestnuts.

>>2920981

jesus, do you live in Haiti or something?

- stop being such a dick to everyone, it's going to cause problems. it's not them you're angry at anyway
- treat Megan, Anne-Marie, and Shannon better. It won't feel right at the time, but it's the grown-up thing to do
-don't EVER go out with Kristi. Bang her, then remove her from your life
-Try harder in grade 12, it'll save you alot of time down the road
-take it easy on the dope

-Heroin really IS kind of overrated just like the shrooms were.
-Don't ever take uppers and downers at the same time.
-Work out more.
-Lol, make fun of justin for his dad dieing, and laugh in him and his brothers face, they don't do shit. Make sure you beat them up when they drive you to their house to talk, don't pity them like i did.

You've started working out, thats good, keep it up. don't quit when that bad cough comes. You have all the money in the world right now, you have your house and your parents, cherish everything. GET A JOB WHEN YOU ARE 16, you won't regret it and you'll appreciate the value of a dollar sooner. You'll eventually make some good friends but one is a pot head and soon you will become one to. don't let it become habit, you can keep your friends without giving into peer pressure. For the love of god work your ass of in high school, work your ass off.

Don't drink that.

Turns out you have diabetes.

>>2921010
I thought cigarettes and booze help you sing better.

maths, maths, maths. do it more, love it, master it. nothing else realy means everything.

- Work harder, you fuckbag. You're making all this shit hard for ME
- Grow up, and do what you like.
- Relax. RELAX.
- Learn how to solder
- Do everything while you can, cause you certainly won't be able to now.

1. Find new friends.
2. Jenny.
3. Go to college. Preferably out of state.

man up motherfucker!
shit will get better, also when you meet that girl 2 years from now, dont be a asshole

Stop fucking around and start paying attention at school before you end up in blue-collar jobs.

Oh, wait...

>>2910194

This. Also, start playing bass earlier.

Work harder. Lose some weight. Improve yourself. DO YOUR GODDAMN HOMEWORK.

And seduce that chemistry teacher. Goddamnit, just do it!

Hi, me when I was 15.
I will beat the shit out of you now.
Do not fucking hang out with those loser faggots who broke your glasses and threw balls at you.
Do NOT rush it when asking a girl out!
Do NOT throw a tantrum when you get rejected.
WEAR GOOD CLOTHES YOU FUCK
Don't be a pussy weeaboo! BE A FUCKING MAN!
Stop fantasizing about a SUPA KAWAII JAPANESE GIRLFRIEND you fuck.
You make me sick. I will fucking beat the fuck out of you just to change the way you are.

Keep being awesome!

Learn the piano.
Learn a foreign language besides German. Look, I know you want to go back to that place but the class is filled with idiots and you're just going to come out despising life.
Brush your teeth more often so you won't have to deal with that incompetent dentist who cut off a chunk of your enamel and who then proceeded to blame it on you being a klutz and you can't sue for medical malpractice because your dad's* a wuss.
*although if this continues as normal, dad will be way nicer due to guilt.
Take care of your eyes. Don't go to the internet so often.
Exercise more.
Learn to dance or something.
That girl you occasionally talk to because you're lonely as hell and your English isn't really good enough yet? She's batshit insane and you'll be considered a loser by association. Your English is fine, talk with other people.
Talk more in general.
Exercise more.
Don't take that tech class. It's pointless and the teacher's a nimrod and repeatedly blocks other people's attempts at asking you out in favor of setting you up with the class Rand-loving neocon. You hate those people and yet the teacher doesn't seem to understand that. She's also horribly racist. Keep taking art, creative writing, or that AP Bio course that one of your best friend will be in.

>>2910181
Don't run away.

You own that school bro. Just keep cool and try not to get expelled this time. You end up fucked

ahem...
Dear 15 yo self.

hey, how's it going? JESUS CHRIST QUIT BEING A FUCKING SOCIAL RECLUSE AND HANG OUT WITH THE GUYS. THEY HAVE HOT SISTERS AND WILL HAVE EVEN MORE HOT FRIENDS IN A FEW YEARS. also, stay the FUCK away from this place called 4chan. srsly