Brb, going to spend all my free time watching tv. And not getting a job in real lives.

Why did I lol?

What am I even laughing at?

I dont even

What is this? It made me sad.

if this is a game, there best be a link posted.

i want to see how i fare in life, maybe.

>>2480460
http://rs170.rapidshare.com/files/57762799/real-lives-crack-by-hoofmagoof.rar

It IS a game.

well here goes nothing.

hopefully i don't get the cyber-aids from this link.

oh I used to have this on my computer before it got wiped.
I was always born in either asia or africa and died from some disease.
Except this one time when I was born as a girl in Texas and was sexually abused by my father :(

>>2480499

if this is true i think i just downloaded the best game ever.

>>2480508
it IS the best game ever... for a couple of days, then it gets kinda old. gaut and AIDS is only funny for so long.

Switzerland is boring as fuck.

who post cyberlink?

>>2480540
Fuck Switzerland. I moved to Tehran, got married and had a kid. Also, I'm fucking rich and own like 300,000 plots of land.

>>2480625
>I'm fucking rich
>1 billion rials
>$101,235.07 USD

lol

Wealth is relative, durp. On top of having more than enough money, I've got a family. YOU DON'T HAVE A FAMILY!

>>2480696
>YOU DON'T HAVE A FAMILY!

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF !

>>2480696
I died at 69 in Puerto Rico of heart failure. I had like, 14 grand kids. I couldn't keep track and don't know if there is a little indicator that tells me how many there were.

I'm 11. Should I move out an start my own life?

>>2480767
Start a riot, malaka.

the game has a bug.

if you live in one country, and have a relationship with a girl, then move to other country without her, and marry her - you are in country A while she is in country B.

let's say you are in US and she is in somalia or wherever, were you have exchange rate like 100000000 units of their currency = $1.

then, game converts all currencies to your own currency, BUT - in this scenario it will add gazillions of dollars every month due to bug in game.

i was the richest person on planet as i made about $1.5M / month

WHAT THE HELL I WAS JUST A BABBY I QUIT LIFE

>>2480853

Clearly photoshopped.

One time I started a new life and I died from "Abortion".

What the fuck, I didn't even get to the game screen.

Funny. I was born in Afghanistan and got a little brother named Bahram. I know a Bahram from Afghanistan.

YES YES YES YES YES.
>Japan
>Kanto
>Ayako
THIS IS SO PERFECT OH GOD I'M FEELING EUPHORIC YES YES YES YES

AYAKO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
;_; Why oh why ;_;
Please survive. Become kawaii.

I made 20 million yen in high risk stock off of 4 million I borrowed from my family.

But then I payed them back 40 million somehow, because my folks are crazy like that. They must of charged some stupid interest. And they aren't even alive!

Ayako guy here. JESUS FUCK THIS ACTION PACKED ACTION REALLY BITES MY NERVES AND PULLS THEM OUT. I AM TREMBLING WITH FEAR EACH TIME I PRESS THAT "AGE A YEAR" BUTTON. AYAKO IS ONLY 2 BUT SHE AND HER FAMILY ALREADY WENT THROUGH A HUGE VOLCANO ERUPTION WHERE OVER 9000 PEOPLE DIED OH GOD THIS IS AWESOME THANK YOU >>2480472

Does it open in adobe acrobat reader? Cause when I downloaded it, it said the file was incomplete and couldn't read it. Can some one post a different free download link?

Oh, I am SO going to FUCK A LOT OF DUDES, wait and see.

Died with 2,021,292 Canadian dollars. i had a wife and a daughter, i lived a prudent life.

hey, other than cheating, is there a way to become rich? you know, how be an NGO official or something. how do i get there?

GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER

also GOITER GOITER GOITER GOITER

>>2481114

You just need a grad school degree, and you have to apply for it a bunch of times to get it. Then you ask for a raise every year and invest your money.

I enjoy being raped by my father and then having goiter for 60 years.

better than the sims, this

>>2481101
Dude, Wisconsin? If it were me, I'd rather fuck the chicks than the dudes...

I live in india.

my brother is a smoker in perfect health.

I'm 3, and I am dying of the whooping cough.

fuck this game is awesome.

why can't I go to college D:

>>2481462

you are too stupid, get smarter.

sometimes you are just not born with enough intelligence.

for fun, make your own character with the lowest attributes possible. make life suck!

india guy here again.

life has been pretty shitty for poor Bhanu. every girl he met early on either didn't feel the same, or they'd break up. he went through two wives like that.

finally, he got a wife, and they lasted for ten years and had four kids. then she died at 50 of cancer.

now, I am blind at 52.

oh well, at least I'm rich as shit. I'm an artist and I've been living very modestly the entire game, so now I have a shitton of money to do whatever with until I die an early death as I know I will.

I married a 59-year-old with down syndrome is this awesome y/n

I was born in India as Bhanu Shivaiah.
I began school at six, became an artist at sixteen.
At nineteen, I married Anju, who had been my girlfriend of five years. She began abusing me, so I took up smoking. Eventually, I just left her.
I was single for the next ten years. So ronery.
After three more failed relatrionships, I married Baiju and had about five kids through the course of our twenty-year marriage, which ended when she died at 50 of stomach cancer.
I get cataracts.
Another couple of failed relationships, and I marry Gajra. She dies one year later. Of stomach cancer.
My next wife, I find out, is mentally retarded. She abuses me, so I leave.
My next girlfriend dies of dehydration.
Three of my four kids are dead, one from a seizure and two from asthma.
I die at seventy from prostate cancer.

come on, /r9k/, let's hear your life stories. I want to see whose is shittier than mine.

I was born a girl in Zambia. My parents named me Pumla.

At one, I suffered from severe malnutrition.

At three, I developed goiter.

At four, I died of starvation.

Real Indian here.

This shit ain't funny, man.

My life has been an incredible success story. I grew up poor as dirt in rural India with 3 brothers and 2 sisters, and suffered from a variety of diseases throughout my youth. Fortunately, I was born with high intelligence. After I graduated high school, I got married, moved out of the house, had a few kids, and began working as an electronic equipment operator. After a few years, I got a better job as a police inspector and saved up enough to illegally enter the United States.

In the US, I went to college while working part-time, and eventually earned a graduate degree in law at the age of 32. Then I got a job as a senior government official and was suddenly rich as fuck. I indulged myself in a gourmand diet and a luxurious home, was a spendthrift shopper, made saintly contributions to charity, and adopted several kids.

Unfortunately, my kids were lazy as fuck, and by their mid 30s they still hadn't gotten jobs or moved out of the house. So I moved to Iraq, where all my kids were forced to enter the military. Then at age 60, I impulsively divorced my wife and left my family, retired, and moved to Japan, where I married a woman named Michiko and lived out of the rest of my days peacefully in Wakayama. I purposely blew most of my fortune on high-risk stocks so my worthless lazy kids wouldn't inherit anything, and then died of bladder cancer at age 71.

(made initial traits all 0s): I was born Abdu Addy to a large family of 11 in Rwanda. I moved out as early as I could and moved to a more stable locale. I was too stupid to get into trade school or any other school, so i did odd jobs living under grueling conditions. i saved money for years, losing it several times to robberies and bank failures. I developed goiter at age 8 that continued until I died. I finally scraped together enough money to move to Nicaragua, where I spent 15 years of my life also doing odd jobs. I again was a prudent investor, and eventually, a mutual fund shot up overnight, giving me enough money to emigrate to Iceland, where I also did odd jobs, but this time with safe water, medical care, and public sanitation. I died at the age of 64 of an infection, doing odd jobs for significantly more money than I even have.

Srsly guys, make a 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 character and put him/her in a shitty place. See what you can do.

>>2481731
Go back to your Reservation, man.

wtf


divided by zero?

what the fuck is this shit its frightening

best way to make money from investments?

>>2482024
I'd like to know this too plz

Got my car stolen.

Fucking iceland.

>>2482024
>>2482033

I like to invest in land, as I think that it is the stablest investment. I don't think there's any tricks to it, but I'm not sure.

Is a glitch if your parents are deadbeats? I was born in the US, but neither of my parents had jobs throughout my entire childhood, which stunted my growth and fucked up my health for life. I was forced to move out and become a factory worker at age 13, which I think further destroyed my health.

I managed to go to college and get a job as a marketing director, plus I married a chick with 80 intelligence who is also a marketing director, and then I became a millionaire on the stock market. But I'm about to fucking die, I'm 30 and my health is only at 16. I'm also clinically depressed. What bullshit.

Fuck you, mom and dad.

>>2482072

nah, I was born in china and none of my parents worked until i was 14 (and already moved out).

You just save money and move to an okay place. find an intelligent wife, be a smart investor.

Born as the youngest of five kids in a family in China. I'm dumb as shit but I've got pretty decent endurance and strength.
Pretty eventless life. Did pretty bad in school, got a girlfriend, did military service and then got a job as a small farmer.
I purposefully made my girlfriend pregnant and then I left her :>

>>2482103

>five kids in a family in China

lol paradox.

ummm wtf it's supposed to be a crack but the game won't let me do any more than three lives halp :|

>>2482119

the .rar you downloaded should have a readme.txt in it. read that, it's fairly clear about what you are to do.

>>2482103
here...

I just got raped D:

There goes my future.
Oh, and being an activist means 15 to 25 years in prison.
I hate it.

Why are my kids so fucking lazy? They're all in their 20s/30s and married with kids, yet they're all unemployed and haven't moved out yet. I came all the way from fucking Uzbekistan to carve out a decent existence for them and they don't do shit except leech off me. There should be an option to kick them out. Fucking brats.

This is my first life. I was born as a girl named Michelle at the northernmost point of Madagascar. I started with 97 strength. Fuck yeah, I'm gonna close the SHIT out of the ports.

I was born Kwesi Ahomadegbe in Liberia. I had a gift of intelligence from an early age, almost destroyed from a half-dozen diseases I got during my childhood. I managed to do well enough to go to trade school but college was not an option. At 21 I married my first wife and emigrated to South Africa. While there I earned a shit ton of money and illegally entered the US, settling in California. I knocked up my wife and then divorced her to avoid having to deal with the kid, married a girl named Judy (who my parents didn't approve of, but didn't take action about -- like all of my romances) and had a daughter, Eva. Then there was an earthquake and I died at 32.

Sucks.

>>2482201

>imvu

you got be be fucking kidding me

how do I become homosexual?

>>2482072
I think you missed the point of Real Lives.

>>2481114
no, what you do is you borrow an assload of money and invest it all in high-risk stocks

LEVER UP AND GABLE BIG

worked for me, went from 1.5mil net worth to 3mil net worth in a year by borrowing 3mil dollars or so and investing it all in one high risk stock

>>2482285
I troll that place dressed as Jesus and get myself kicked out of religious chatrooms.

how the fuck do i get into college damn i have high intelligence D:

If you have too many kids, the game breaks.

I wish I could beat my deadbeat husband so he would get a fucking job. FUCK

I remember I tried to have like 20 different kids with different mothers but it crashed at 11. And I couldn't get 20 year old fertile mothers at 57.

>>2482295
Well, the way I did it was something like this:

----I'm attracted to females.
-I start fapping to loli
---I'm attracted to females and lolis now.
-I start fapping to shota and loli.
---I'm slowly changing the object of my attraction from lolis to shotas.
-I fap to only shotas, or shota on shota.
---I now like shota and can't really get it up for loli.
-I fap to yaoi and some shota.
---I am beginning to like yaoi more and shota less.
-I fap to nothing but yaoi.
---I am now a 'yaoifanboi'
-I fap to pictures of real gay men.
---PREST-O CHANGE-O
I am gay.

>>2482385
Interesting... I deviated from that and I've been stuck with dickgirls and trannies for a while now...

But I ment how do I change my sexuality in the game? I saw there is an option to consider sexual orientation, but I only get heterosexual sex =(

I was born an only child in Livonia, Michigan. My father was a marketing director and my mother was an "electronic equipment operator", so we were pretty well off. I dropped out of school at age 16 and refused to get a job. My mother tied of uterine cancer when I was 25, but my dad still had a pretty good job so I didn't have to work. I was extremely ugly so I kept getting turned down by girls, and the only ones who would accept me were ugly, poor and dumb, so I chose to remain a virgin. I continued living with my dad until he died when I was 38, leaving me about $500k.

I then moved to Japan, knocked up and abandoned a series of ugly, poor, middle-aged Japanese women, and lived the most luxurious life possible until my inheritance money ran out. I was forced to become a beggar on the streets of Yokohama, eventually dying at age 67.

You were only in my life for a short time Tong, but I will never forget you.

I didn't report her or retaliate. i hope we stay married forever and she hits me regularly. It'll be funny when I'm rich and dead.

>>2482457
I began one game as a gay Jew.

greaterthansigncolonthree.png

damn you. And this is a mootblock because I avoid the muting system by blocking my door, so that moot can not get in and duct tape my mouth.

What does the conscience stat mean? My character has it at 100.

>>2482618
It means you're good at telling right from wrong. So you'll be less likely offered shady deals, invitations to smoke/drink/do drugs.

I got a girl with 95 looks on eastern china. 0 conscience , raping guys and dumping them, doing drugs, cigars, booze. Died of cancer at 36

Was poor white trash from Springfield, Missouri. Became a doctor, moved out to Ontario, California. Got married, had a kid. I was constantly getting burglarized so I moved to Victoria, Canada, only got burglarized once there, died of colon cancer at 66.

Somehow, I think it's funner if you're born in a third-world shithole.

emigrated illegally from india
got a graduate degree in physics in england
became a doctor
became a senior government official
lived on maxed out food/shopping/home for 30 years
had 1 daughter
wife died
daughter became a smoker and mooched off me for 20 years
retired and moved around the US
moved to Fuji
became a senior NGO official for amusement, even though I am filthy rich
got too old to do that
became a company president at 79
became a writer at 81
got a sexy japanese wife
died from opportunistic infection at 83 with 1.6 billion yen

lesson: go to college

I want the retail version so I can give myself 100 for everything and see what happens

do shady deals EVER pay off?

>>2482818
no. it's an educational game, so that shit's biased.

>>2482806
game crashes.
Tried already, I wanted to fuck the life of 'mr. perfect' , but the game beated me to it.

Well, I thought I did the crack properly but now I've played my three lives and it tells me NO MORE. I don't know what I did wrong, oh god I love this game please help

>>2482868
same thing happened to me. just re-install it when you run out of lives.

>>2482806
What happens is, you live to 70, have 15 kids, hundreds of grandkids, your youngest son becomes a priest and you die of cancer.

>>2482868
OS you're using?

And just to be extremely sure (I'm not doubting your intelligence, I'll just presume it's non existent)
Install the game, don't run it, right click the crack, select copy.
Go to your game archive (usually C:\Program Files\Educational Simulations\Real Lives ) and PASTE the motherfucker , replacing the existent file when prompted to.

Enjoy.

lol let's post this in every writefag thread

some things i've discovered:

don't get rich until your kids move out of the house.

to do the above, have kids early. go to college/grad school while working a part time job. if in college, pick up reading as (one of?)your leisure activit(y/ies). Make miniscule money, give most to charity if there is excess. keep working poor jobs until your kids are gone, then get an awesome job and invest in land. if your wife's health is waning, cash in all your investments and buy high-risk mutual funds. when she dies, you will have MILLIONS.

Oh god help me, I lol'd so hard. Bitch hit me with a brick, goddamn.

I like how television viewing is grayed out if you go blind.

>>2482664
So you got to play Revy?

This has got to be the greatest memetic mutation of a game ever.

make is 2 billion dollars now

and you can take unlimited number of family loans at zero interest and up to a quarter of your net worth at a time, so it takes 40 loans to lever yourself up to 10:1, which you then put into land or bonds or whatever.

I'm a Sudanese girl named Olabisi.
Famines, War, all that great shit. Bon.

>>2482940
1. take family loan for a quarter of your net worth
2. take about 39 more family loans
3. invest in bonds
4. ????
5. billionair

If you watch your expenses you can retire at this point and have enough money to live to age 175605

WHEE JUST INVESTED 585 BILLION DOLLARS IN HIGH RISK STOCKS

WISH ME LUCK GUYS

Is it possible to be rich in Zimbabwe?

my middle-age chinese man :|

>>2483244

I don't know...

Just emigrate to Belgium and make boatloads of cash.

>>2483276
hahahaha priceless

so I'm filthy rich again and my 27 year old student wife is now a 45 year old student wife

fffffffuck

>>2483244
If you let them discover economy, then yes.

To cope with my infertility I've decided to adopt as many children as I can. Take that, China!

it are virus >:(

>>2483299
now she's physically abusing me. great.

what's the difference between stocks/bonds/mutual funds?

Bumping for turbo-lulz.

was a senior government official making 200k a month with 150 million dollars in the bank

born to parents working in a factory, fuck yeah.

75 year old Muslim born in near India. Moved to USA and finally Philippines. Became schizophrenic at age 74. Invested 66,000,000 pesos in land in the Philippines and committed suicide at age 75. Lol.

>>2483854
>schizophrenic
>age 74
disapprovingdoctor.jpg

I was born Eugene Mitchell of Honolulu. My parents were deadbeats and lived off of savings while raising me. I was artistic and musical from a young age and studied hard enough to raise my intelligence 25 points and get all the way through graduate school. I got a degree in Government and Pre-Med and became a doctor (lol no med school). I came down with the flu and died at 29.

What the hell. Also, this happened a lot.

>My son Bay's boyfriend So has graduated from secondary school.

Great, my son is gay.

What are the advantages of some of these characteristics? 95 physical endurance? What jobs can I get with that?

I was born in a poor family, the youngest of 2 children in Indonesia. I had goiter all throughout my childhood, but managed to marry a pretty hot girl at age 13. I started having kids with her at 14. I didn't know she was addicted to drugs when I married her, though. I stopped having kids with her at 18, 4 kids in total, 2 boys, 2 girls. Then I got a job and moved out with her a year later. We were pretty poor and all the kids were a bit malnourished, but we saved up enough money to move to Egypt. Then, a couple of the kids moved out, and we had enough money to move to Liverpool, England. Then, there was only 1 daughter still living with us, when my wife threw something at me during a fight. I got mad at her and divorced and moved to a city in southern California. There, I married a hot WASP lady and had 4 girls with her. I really only wanted one last son that would be half white and raised in America, but I gave up after 4 girls. I got sick of her and divorced, and moved to Sacramento. There, I married another chick that actually had a decent job. We saved up money and lived the good life for a while. Then, I decided to go to college. I got my bachelor's, but it didn't help me get a better job. I already had a lot of money anyways, so I just retired and became an alcoholic. I had a heart attack and tried to quit drinking. But, I didn't wanna be a pussy AA member, so I decided I would still drink a little. Then, we moved to a nice house in Costa Rica, and I died a couple years later at age 64.

LOL, who knew a poor Indonesian kid could retire in luxury with an american woman in costa rica?

>>2484006
Doesn't help much. Probably just sports jobs and construction.

>>2484027
REAL LIFE DID

>Your father has died at age 22 from a stroke.

wat, is this even possible?

>>2484006

Professional athlete, but the chances of getting that are pretty slim and you can't apply for it beyond a certain age. Just like real life derp derp.

>>2484006
I thought endurance played to how many times you were beaten/raped/got a goiter and didn't fall over dead.

I don't think my daughter Mieko is adapting to life well in Jackson, Mississippi. She keeps asking for permission to marry guys, and when I say 'Yes' they break up. That's obviously my side of the family. Passionate Filipino blood I tell you what.

I hope there will be a Real Lives 2009.

This crack sucks, I'm getting too many errors. I found a copy with a serial number - it's weird, but it won't work with the version installed from >>2480472. It must be a version difference or something. I just installed it over the previous one, then put in the serial included - it works.
http://rapidshare.com/files/174748344/Real_Lives_2007.rar

I'm gonna get raped

LOL I love this game! I lived one life as one of the world's biggest assholes and still lived a pretty happy life. I was born to a working class family near Madrid, Spain, the youngest of two boys. I stayed back a couple grades cause I was lazy and dumb. I started smoking regularly after that. Then when I was 14 I dropped out of school and got my GF pregnant. I then had 4 more kids with different GFs. I tried to bribe my way out of a draft, but it didn't work and I was in the army for a couple years. I still got a couple girls pregnant when I was in the military.

Then I moved into a shitty apartment and supported my family with robberies. I had a couple more kids and got married to the mom of the last kid, just cause she had a job. So I had 10 kids in total and I was unemployed. It went on like this for a while. I pulled off a couple big robberies to support the family, and then some of the kids were old enough to work and they supported the family for a while. My wife threw a brick at me and I beat her up. Eventually, they all moved out and I divorced my wife and moved to Escondidio California. I married another woman and pulled off at least a dozen major robberies so I could live pretty luxuriously. I almost always had ample food, a modest house, and shopped a bit more than average. I got into a fist fight with some random guy when I was 60 years old, but nobody got hurt. When I was 67 I got caught robbing a store and went to prison for two years. I got out and died when I was 72 from lung cancer.

I must have only put in 4 or 5 years of real work in my whole lifetime. And I had at least 20 grand children. I'm amazed I only got caught on my last robbery.

So I'm an 18-year-old American with INT 99. Why on earth can I not go to college? I haven't been able to get anyone in yet.

Damn.
I was a stupid chinamen... got into the army and married, then leaved it and started to be rebel... got arrested a few times and moved out to Brazil with fear in my heart... got a job as a Sargent then got millions with high risk funds...
Got dementia, which BTW killed my dad, and fucking retired... well I DID. My bitch wanted to so some slavework.
Then got back to china and died in the other year.
Did I mention that I was epilatic since I was 12? Yeah. That shit killed me.

I'm 31 year old infertile Japanese woman with a deadbeat husband and I've just been raped