I'll kick it off with this nice one, as it was the inspiration for the fractal that I created above for this thread. (If anyone really likes it, I would be happy to render it much nicer and bigger, custom to your preferences.

I call it the zen of fluid dynamics. Sit in a sunbeam in a dimly-lit room. Light a stick of incense, hold it vertically, then move it upwards and stop suddenly, with a jerk. A perfect smoke-ring will be launched from the burning tip. Move the incense upwards, then suddenly jerk downwards, then repeat. You can launch fast smoke-rings through the center of slow ones, create side-by side rows, etc. In a draft-free room they persist for ages, and soon the air will be full of huge grey thin circles.
Contemplate the silent chaos.

I can put a 16 penny nail in my nose. :)

"human blockhead"

Never try your own semen

>>2464394
this can be done with anything that emits smoke, i.e cigarette.
i can move my eyes in opposite direction(think the worst case of lazy eye you've seen, i can teach those who can cross eye very well)
i can jump through a single leg(my arm holds the other leg at my waist)
Ventriloquist
make a water-drop sound from flicking my cheek

I learned how to suck myself off. It's pretty amazing. :D

Look in a mirror and reach into your mouth with a few fingers from each hand.
Pull and hold your lips way out wide, and then open and close your mouth a few times. Move your jaw around.

YOU ARE NOW AWARE OF YOUR SKULL.

I like the taste of my cum.

I could name a several bar tricks I've picked up. One of the hardest ones was to get a penny balanced on the very tip of the hanger. Now that is the easy part, then you have to swing it all the around 360 degrees, and still have the penny balanced perfectly on the tip. All i remember for tips on it was to have the heads side up, and when you twirl it as it comes down, you have to rock it back and forth slowly after to keep the penny balanced.

I will post some more if anyone wants.

After working as the host of a cocktail bar for a year my social skills went through the roof. Now I can defuse basically any confrontation and get myself out of violent situations unhurt. I can read peoples body language to the point where I know how to react to calm them down. I dont even know entirely how I do it but I have this reputation amoung my friends as the negotiator and peacemaker.

>>2464441
Sorry, I don't want a goatse-mouth

>>2464430

I can cross one eye independently of the other.

I other words, one eye straight forward, while the other one looks like it's pointed at my nose. I can switch the eyes too.

Another thing, I can "jiggle" my eyeballs. You have to get really close to see me do it, but it looks like my eyes are vibrating.

Well, while we're at it, I can flip my eyelids inside out. Anyone want to see a picture?

I don't know how well this works for girls, but for guys, when you are just about to urinate, and I assumed you are standing, have a glass of water handy.

With one hand direct the stream so you avoid a mess, and with the other, hold the glass. Time it right...start to drink as soon as you start to piss.

If you do it right, no distractions, and are relatively calm, you'll just mellow out and feel this unending link, the stream from your lips to urethra, unbroken.

Weird feeling if you can pull it off.

>>2464478
how i teach people how to do this..
everyone look left without moving their heads...now crosseye.

>>2464478
Post a pic of the jiggling while crosseyed with your eyelids inside out.

Hey guys, if you're telling us about the nifty tricks you can do...

tell us how we can do them too!!!

>>2464543
Please stop rhyming.

>>2464507
Bullshit, isn't even possible.

>>2464516

The way I've always explained it is:
1. cross your eyes
2. you now see two images.
3. while keeping your eyes crossed, look at one of those images. I makes more sense if you try it.
4.????
5. the game.


It's really fun to run up to someone you know and do this-


"OH FUCK OH FUCK MAN, SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH MY EYE!"
:shake head, blink rapidly, act more and more scared when your one eye doesn't return to normal:
"Oh god, what happened? Did you have a stroke or something?"
:Smack yourself on the side of the head, returning eyes to normal:
"Oh thank god, I hate when that happens."

>>2464464
Any interesting stories to tell?
>>2464507
Does it feel good, man?

I'm still trying to come up with something...

>>2464507
Roses are red
Niggers are black
the tricks you can do
are straight up wack

decide what to do at after 37% of the time you have for the decision passed. or you can just disregard that and do it anyway because you brain tells you to do so without your knowledge.

>>2464584
Sophmore year of highschool my history teacher thought i had a permant crosseye for about a week. then one day while talking to her i fixed my glaze, reaction was so cash

>>2464574
it's not literal, just the feeling you get
obviously it's not possible
>>2464593
yeah, kinda. More weird than good

I like to make these eye noises, I call it "eye popping" or "eye farting".

I pull out my upper eye lid and let air in. Then I put pressure above and below my eye (kind of on the eye lids, but not really) and force the air out. It makes this kind of gross fart/squeak sound and feels pretty good. Usually, other people hate the sound and are disgusted by the act and sound.

If you put your finger into up your nose with the nail touching the center part (the hard ligament), and slowly and carefully agitate it (careful not to scratch it), you'll make yourself want to sneeze. Great for if you need to sneeze, but don't quite, and get the sneezing blue balls sensation.

most people can't figure out how to make farting noises with their hands. the trick is to keep them together, i guess. i can do it with my breastbone and back of my knee too.

(edit: >>2464677)
I forgot to mention, you have to get the backish of the nose. About where the nose meets the skull.

>>2464659

I was once at a seminar for some reason or another and there were a few hundred people packed into one room to listen to a speaker. When she came on, she first told everybody how to do that, then had the whole room go silent and start doing it.

The sound of hundreds of eyeball noises going simultaneously was one of the craziest things i've ever heard.

>>2464731
holy fuck that's the coolest thing ever. i've never met anyone else who could do it or wanted to do it.

>>2464478
I can do that too! Awesome stuff.

I also can, with my hand flat on a table top, turn my right arm all the way around. Saw David Blaine do it on his TV show when I was younger (except he makes this nasty cracking noise to make it seem.. stranger) and I decided to try it and, voila!

I can also pop my shoulder in and out. Obviously not all the way out of the socket, but its still kinda nasty. Unfortunately, considering all my joints are pretty loose which allows me to do this shit, I can't play real contact sports. Which is ok, I guess, since I'm a girl and not joining a rowsing game of football anytime soon, but it still is scary to think how easily my joints could just pop apart.

The eyelid popping thing isn't really a trick, everyone can do it. I never knew other people actually did it though.

>>2464532

Well, here's the two crosseyed next to each other. Eyelid inside out is next.

I can't provide video of vibration unfortunately, it's one of the few downsides of SLR cameras...

>>2464798

You know, somehow it kind of makes sense to me that one of those types of girls from back in elementary school who knew how to do those weird flexible joint dislocation things would end up browsing 4chan.

Kudos to you :)

>>2464931
Uhh, thanks?

I thought about making a video of my eyes jiggling but I'm too lazy to upload it and shit.

This one is best done while alone, but it's a doozy.
If you are in a car at night while its raining, try plastering your face against the glass. Slide it along until your eye is filled with the huge blurry image of a single raindrop on the outside glass. Move until a distant streelight is captured by the distorting lens of the raindrop. The resulting image is full of incredibly fine diffraction fringes. These are probably a more detailed image than you've ever seen before, since they are caused by shadows and lightwaves, and they do not depend on the quality of your eye's lens.
The crazy caustics and interleaved diffraction fringes, all slowly morphing as the droplet slowly makes its way down the window, are something straight out of a dream.
Don't let your loved ones catch you with your face all smashed and distorted on the glass, staring fixedly off into the distance for any minutes at a time, while humming old rock albums to yourself.

Create REALLY BIG static sparks: on a winter's day, scuff your feet on the rug so that your body becomes electrified. Now stand near a victim. Wiggle your shoes while pressing on the rug, so that you build up some charged footprints. Now suddenly LEAP INTO THE AIR and touch your victim with your finger at the same time, while you're still in flight. The spark will be much stronger than normal.

It's called "capacitve voltage multiplication." VandeGraaff generators actually employ this effect. See, science is fun!

>>2464962
I imagined someone seeing me do that and I lold.

>>2464798
I do the shoulder dealio as well, but play contact sports.
o_0

>>2464945

Wait, so you do all three of the things I listed?

We're like...soulmates.

You really should do that video, the attempts that I found on youtube of people trying to shake their eyes were horrid.

>>2465026
Well, if I were you I'd try and protect your shoulders as much as possible. It would be a lot more likely to dislocate it since the joint is so loose.

>>2465049
Nah, I can't flip my eyelids inside out or cross one eye.

I can make fart noises with my hands clasped together.
I can suck fluid up my nose and shoot it out my eye.
I can make one eye cross and one eye straight.
I can suck my own dick. And no its not amazing.

>>2464478
I can doo all this as well.

I used to jiggle my eyelids whenever someone would raise their voice, it was instinctive and I didn't realise till someone wen't "Holy shit your eyes are freaky!" then I realised I could do it on command.

>>2464516
I got cross eyed and then look slightly to one side. you get used to it eventually

>>2464659
Can do that, too. Good for getting eyelashes out

>>2464978
fuck yeah.

If a beer bottle lid (screw top) is on too tight or your hands are greasy from the bbq, quickly wipe the top with the plam of your hand (just a quick one, so it's mostly dry but not greasy) and then push the top into the meaty part of your lower arm, palm down so it's on that light soft bit, really hard, and twist. Viola! bottle opened and you look like a pro. You gotta get into it hard though, so you get it on the first try. This helps if you don't have man hands, but man hads are much better.

First teach yourself to cross just one eye (see above.) Now jam one finger up your nose, tap your friend on the shoulder, and say "I can touch my optic nerve!" Simultaneously tense your hand and swerve one eye back and forth, as if your finger is pushing upon it from within.
Protip: If going up the right nostril, look to the left. vice versa.

i found that if i vibrate my eyes back and forth really fast, i get really tired really fast. and i mean like REALLY tired.
as in, fall asleep within 10 seconds of lying down tired.
ive tried it, just counting numbers while wiggling my eyes... i woke up and the last number i remember counting was 14. thats low. REAL low. for counting numbers
wat

Create weird illusions:

Lean your head up against your arm, on a desk of some sort. Make sure you're sitting. Move your head and arm around so your right eye has pressure from the arm on it, and the left eye has a little bit of light coming in. You should start to see weird patterns in the darkness, but after a few seconds it will start hurting a lot. For me, most of the patterns look like complex Victorian illustrations of cherubs and flowers, which is pretty cool.

>>2464394

Any way you could get make that 1680 x 1050 ?

>>2465185
Correction: Actually, using your left eye is preferred, but I guess the right one could work too.

>>2465188

No problem, that's my resolution too.
I'll get right on it; do you have any input on colors or anything like that before I start rendering?

I can lift up either eyebrow independently of each other in that creepy Hey baby *raise eyebrow twice* way. When I do the left eyebrow, it also wiggles my left ear.

>>2465250

orange, yellow and green

also, bootmlox

>>2464962
>>2464962

damn i put lots of effort into making films like this

>>2465454
Please explain yourself further.

I can do something which I've heard is called "throat singing". What I do is force air through my throat in such a way that a chord is produced instead of just one note. If you've ever played StarCraft, think of the sounds the Zerg Mutalisk and the Zerg Scourge make.

It's hard to stay in tune, and I'm limited to relatively high pitches and a very limited range, but I can speak while doing this. I haven't tried singing, mostly because I'm not a very good singer even when I'm singing normally.

It takes a bit of trial and error to get it right each time I start doing it - once I get it again, I can do it for about an hour before I forget how to do it.

The way you do it is by constricting your throat as if you're being strangled, and then exhaling forcefully, from your diaphragm. I have no idea how it actually works, but that's the best way I can describe it.