What are they about? Beyond LULZ VAMPIRES, of course. Is there an actual plot?

...Why read a horrible book series?

What do you think the appeal is? Why does it resonate with women so much?

>>2195985

The short summary would be that a young girl, Bella Swan, meets a 100-year-old teenage looking vampire, Edward Cullen, and their sexual tension goes throughout the books and a romance that goes across boundaries starts to begin.

Edward first falls in love with her because she smells so nicely, and he wants to drink her blood, and she just thinks he is super hot, but it somewhat becomes that they like their personalities, I think.

Then there is an Indian kid who becomes the third person in the cliche love triangle.

what really happens in the last book?
is the c-section with teeth really in there?

its not a horrible series but now its like being a conformist to read it.

And why haven't you killed muteblox yourself yet?

>>2195988

Simple. I read all four books in less than 3 days. In those 3 days, it's simple to see how girls think. First off, a lot of girls read Twilight. If you're in the ages between 13 and 30, you probably know at least one good looking person without a boyfriend that is staring or is into the series.

Every fangirl basically loves Edward Cullen, and if you read it and try to look inside the character, you'll find some interesting things.

Basically, you might not look like Edward, but if you act like him a little bit (not the biting part on the first date), the girl will somewhat get into you.

The whole appeal of Edward, besides his beauty, is his listening. He always listens to Bella, and he looks out for what is best for her. He doesn't mind if he loses an argument, but he just wants her to be happy and that's all he really cares about.

The things that make Edward an amazing person to these girls are not really hard to understand. Yes, 50% of it is because he's beautiful, but it's also because he listens, knows how to handle a woman, is confident, and really can know how to make a girl special.

After reading the books, I acted like a faggot a little bit, and I got four phone numbers from semi-attractive females.

>>2195998

Answered that in the last question, but besides his looks, it's these three things:

- HE ACTUALLY LISTENS. He asks Bella questions and wants to actually get to know her
- He's confident.
- He's nice to her friends, family, and tries to make everyone feel comfortable. You can take the vamprie and human setting and flip it over. Sometimes your friends and her friends won't like each other. If you try to be equal to both parties and try to find a middle, she'll see you in a really bright light

>>2195969
What's it like being a complete fucking retard?

>>2196021

Yes, Bella gives birth to a demon spawn. The last book is amazing garbage and throws out the redeeming qualities that the other three had. The first three books were pretty bad, but they had these things guys could pick up on, add to their personality, and girls would go crazy.

In the last book Edward becomes a very different character, and I think that's why a lot of the fangirls hated the last book.

>>2196073

It feels amazing when I'm plunging my penis into my girlfriend's vagina.

>>2196045
I'd rather die a virgin than buy into that garbage

OMG I'M READING THE BOOK ABOUT THE COOL MOVIE OF THE SEASON I'M SO IN!!!1

>>2196130

It's called a library.

What I did.

>>2196028
here. I'll take that back.
Fine. Read this, common rebuttals on why Twilight sucks:
http://twilightsucks.proboards81.com/index.cgi?action=display&board=twilight&thread=638&
page=1
HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES?

>>2196181

The books do suck.

Just because the books are shit, doesn't mean you can't pick up some things and use them to your advantage.

I'm not denying that she's horrible at writing.

She is.

>>2196162
Uh...

Oh, "buy into" not "buy", improve your english proficiency some

>>2196214

Alright, my mistake, but I don't see why you can't read them.

Edward is a terribly written character, but he's written in a way girls will forever love him. The writer is a hormonal bitch who orgasms to Edward while she is writing, so she's basically giving you all the tools you need to get women.

Getting girls who enjoy Twilight? Like fish with a gun in their mouths.

A former coworker of mine tried to talk me into the series by saying what an amazing and original character Edward was.

Was he actually interesting? At all?

Also, demonspawn? She had a vampirechild? I thought they couldn't reproduce sexually for fairly obvious reasons

>>2196257

Edward isn't interesting, but again, if you just take some shit he does in the books and apply it to some girls you like (doesn't have to be a Twilightfag, but it works more if she is), and then just fake it.

The best thing is, Edward is fake as shit. He's the most fake boyfriend ever, and he only loves Bella because of her scent and blood.

>>2196300

Yeah she kept going on about the sent thing and how his love for her was the only thing that kept him from eating her... or something equally stupid.

What are some of the things he does that makes him so attractive? He listens to her, confident, and respects her friends and family... Sounds like pretty average traits to me (vampireness aside).
I'm female myself, but am rather confused at this whole twilight phenomenon... Guess everyone else just creams their panties over vampires or something.

OP, what do you think of Bella's personality? Is she a appealing character? The author thinks she's a good role model. Personally, I thought she was a pretty stupid little selfish bitch. One of the only characters that I didn't detest was Jacob, and that's probably because he was the only flawed character, at least in comparison to Edward. What did you think of Jacob's character and his relation with Bella?

I read the whole series and fucking hated it. I threw the last book across the room and wondered why I'd ever wasted my time on it. Despite being female, I have no idea why any girl would ever be attracted to a really boring overprotective outdated guy like Edward.

OP, you have interested me in Twilight. Congrats.

>>2196356
He starts off stalking her. And watching her ALL night long, even before they are formally introduced to each other.
And he continues to watch her sleep all night after they get together.
Edward is a creepy stalker bastard with control issues. He doesn't hesitate to bite or bare his fangs at anyone who gets too close to Bella.
But Bella doesn't mind those faults since Edward is only THE HAWTEST GUY IN TEH SCHOOL EVAR GUIZ!

You have made me want to read it. You said something about the fourth one sucking. Could I still be fake and manipulative effectively if I didn't read that last one?

>>2196471
Just read the plot summaries on wikipedia, or encyclopedia dramatica. Yes, I just recommended ED, but that article is somewhat truthful in its summary of Twilight.

I met this amazing girl and began chatting on msn and finally it came up if she has read Twilight she did and said it was the worst literature she has ever read.

I feel in love when she told me that.

What kind of girl is this.

>>2196508

It's actually a dude.

>>2196508
She has a brain that has matured past the hormonal teenage drama.
Keep her, most women don't grow up.

>>2196485
no offense, but I think I'll hear from OP, since he seems to know about being a manipulative douchebag better than even ED. and I mean that in the best possible way, because its my intention too.

I need a job, who do you work for?

>>2196508

Despite it's unique coloration, this breed of female is actually quite common. This strain is often misrepresented due to the other breed, FanigurlicusTwilighicus, which is much louder with it's screeching mating calls crying on for miles.

Still a good catch :D!

book sucks, book is full of beautiful shallow characters and continuous rising action so it's appealing to stupid people.

If you're trying to look harder into it then that you're going to get just what the books are, garbage. They aren't deep and they don't tell you anything, other then that most girls are horrendously stupid.

>>2196162
Lucky.
I have a lot of free time on my hands nowadays, so I wanted to pick up the book every anon has been raging about.
My library holds 50 copies of this book, and EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM is booked for at least two months.

Shit's crazy.

Is Twilight an ongoing series? Or has it ended, or does the author have an ending planned?

>>2196406
Submissiveness and Masochism. Face it, most women are. However, its taboo now, so they don't admit it.

Okay, serious question. I'm an older anon, and I work a 9-5 job and don't usually keep up with what's going on in the world besides politics. Where did this Twighlight phenomenon come from? Aren't people still fapping over Harry Potter? Shit seems like it just popped up last week or something.

>>2196691
Harry Potter is SO five minutes ago.
Twilight is the SHIT!

...At least to present popular culture...

I fucking hate Twilight and all of its faggotry. The last time I had sex my girlfriend accidentally called me Edward. Needless to say, we haven't had sex since.

Why haven't you killed yourself?

I never heard of the books until just now and I am wondering why girls are going crazy over this. Vampire falls in love with a human, how is that new.

>>2196214
I think that kind of shows why he's a fan of these books

>>2196773
That's it, I'm staying a virgin for another five years.

Mootblock, because this comment probably isn't original.

How does Edward get a boner if he is a vampire and has no blood?

>>2197347

That's why he wants to drink blood.

>>2197347
thats why vampires are associated with like, dark eroticism.

they suck girl's blood and put it in their penis so they can bone girls.

Hey TwilightGuy,

I appreciate your use of a temporary tripcode for this "Ask An X" thread. You have pointed out very accurately the weakness in the author and the corresponding weakness of character which is easily identifiable in MANY women, and ALL women who are fans of the series. That being said, you recognize it AS A FLAW.

Why then would you accept said women as "girlfriend"? Any woman who has a weakness for this character nuttiness is manifestly not worth the time, and she will fall for the same stupid routine over and over again - simply for more or less physically attractive people, based on her level of personal hotness.

So, I ask the OP: Is it not evident that any woman on whom the "I read Twilight, understand the flawed fantasy themes underlying it, and can therefore manipulate you" works is NOT someone you actually want to spend time dating?

>>2197347
Plot holes. That's why he could get a girl pregnant despite being over 100 years old and having all of the other fluids in his body frozen. And because the author is retard. The main character choosing the vampire is supposed to lead to a life without children, but no, she magically gets pregnant so that she can have the perfect ending.

>>2197413

It's not like my girlfriend is insane or wanting to bang Edward Cullen so hard. All I do is act like I enjoy the books, talk to her about some basic plot points, and listen to her ramble on about the story.

It's not like she's totally insane or anything. Her main weakness is that she sees some part of Edward in me. I listen to her, and I walk her home, hold her hand, and try to act like I'm trying to protect her when bigger people walk close to her. I ask her about herself, and I even tell her that she can see other guys if I'm not who she truly loves.

She eats it up like an ice cream sundae.

If you read the books, and you meet the girl, and you tell her she isn't gay, you're close to being in. ALL GIRLS who like Twilight want to discuss it. They want to find a guy who 'enjoys' the series as well.

There was a show called 'MTV Spoilers' or some shit where they had about 400 girls in a room asking questions to the cast. There's a huge line asking questions, a guy comes up, and every girl in the fucking room starts cheering like crazy and looking at him like meat.

It's basic match.

For every 100 Twilight girls, there is 1 Twilight guy.

And at least 10 of those 100 need to be somewhat attractive.

Play your chances.

>I read all four books in less than 3 days.

I don't care how much the books suck, that's enough for me. I'm reading the first, if nothing else.

>>2197556

They really aren't hard reads.

Skim the annoying descriptions, just read the lines, and you can skim over some of the useless fighting. You'll be done very quick.

A lot of repetitive junk is thrown in each paragraph.

ugh... i am not going to ever buy one of these...

torrent?

This reminds me of Chris-chan's advice for boys to play with my little pony.

http://thepiratebay.org/torrent/4515425/Twilight_Saga_Stephanie_Meyer

> Her main weakness is that she sees some part of Edward in me.

Right. And that's a juvenile, easily manipulated fantasy, not "you". Since you didn't answer directly, I refer you back to my original question: Why would you accept her as your girlfriend?

And then I do you two better:
Why would you not want someone who can see through the juvenile twaddle of the "Twilight fantasy"?
Why would you not want someone who could instead see you (who you truly are)?

I'm not knocking your understanding, here - nor am I knocking the basic traits of "don't treat women like shit, just be a bit nice to them and listen to them". These are Good Things.

If anything, I'm acknowledging that we live in a shitty world that raises weak and pitiful women by the fistful, and then we treat them miserably, making them easy prey for this shit. Because let's face it, if just ***not acting like a douchebag*** is enough to make you seem like a Prince, then we've tragically lowered the standards and expectations of young ladies.

My question is, essentially this - since you are a distinguished Gentleman who has figured all this out already, why would you not seek an appropriate companion - one matched to your own acuity and sensibility - rather than another damaged Twilight girl?

>>2197666

Twilight is a fad, my friend.

I lay the seed now, she falls in love, and we'll branch off from it. Honestly, she's not a bad girl. Me and her get along, but I don't think we would be together if I didn't fake liking Twilight.

She met me while reading the book in class, I said I read it, she smiled and it went off from there. If Twilight was her life, I would be scared, but the thing is, the movie will be done and over for at least another two years until the next one.

In those two years, if I do want to continue, we'll move from the Edward Cullen thing, and we'll build a strong relationship. If not, I get sex.

A win-win.

>>2197686

The Twilight fad will fade, but the inherent character weakness that attracts her to it may well not. I don't know how old you are, sir, but I would caution you to monitor that closely as time goes by.

Cheers, TwilightGuy. It's bedtime for me. You've demonstrated yourself to be an admirable gentleman of /r9k/. Thanks!

>>2197686
Your comments show an overlying superiority complex that is quite disturbing. As a gentleman, one would never talk about someone in this fashion behind their back.

You need to rethink how you look at women.

>>2197666

CAUSE SHE SCREWS LIKE SHE KNOWS STUFFF MANNN

Holy fuck, there are so many things wrong with this that I don't even know where to start.

I don't even think I'm going to try, it's hopeless.

I mean... FUCK!

>>2197755
I think that is his intention...

I don't even know what Twilight is and I already hate it cuz everyone's making such a big goddamn deal about it.

>>2197686

Listen to the woman and pretend to be interested in things she likes?

This isn't rocket science. It's just basically every dating self help book but with sparkling vampires.

>>2196045
(the acting like Edward bullshit)

Listening to a girl? making her happy?
Are you fucking stupid or what?

Doing that to any woman in real life will get you FRIENDZONED in less than a minute!
Unless you're fucking hot...

>
There was a show called 'MTV Spoilers' or some shit where they had about 400 girls in a room asking questions to the cast. There's a huge line asking questions, a guy comes up, and every girl in the fucking room starts cheering like crazy and looking at him like meat.

HOLY SHIT
guy twilight fans are bizarro girl gamers

Here's a question:

How does it feel to be dating a girl that is always going to be comparing you to and holding you up to the standards of an unrealistic fictional character?

/r9k/ having a grudgingly civilized discusion?

blasphemy!

So are you the same one who runs the Twilight Guy website?

http://www.twilightguy.com/

(Everyone else, scroll down to the very bottom of the page and read the entry there. I can't decide whether lulz or rage is in order. o_O)

>>2198164

This is the second one this week that I saw. Both "Ask An X" with temporary tripcodes. The quality of /r9k/ may be improving.

>>2197992
CoId reading is coId

OP is either:
1. A troll
2. A female
3. A retard

Take your pick.

Fucking hell, that movie poster is exactly like the one in Harry Potter movie. Fuck.

>>2199795
4. All of the above?

I mean, liking the series sort of requires both 2 and 3 to be true to begin with...

>>2199828
Touche. Well, defintely requires 3, I suppose it's not inconceiveable some retarded boys like it.

If he's a troll he's a good one, though.

>Literature
>Twilight

Best be trolling niggers.

>>2195969

So what does it feel like to waste perfectly good time with poorly written fiction?

I mean... people talk shit about anne rice's novels and they're better than twilights bullshit. At least the characters have some fucking depth.

All in all though read a real fantasy book. Something by terry pratchett, or some good sci-fi. i.e. something by neal stephenson, larry niven, or pretty much any kind of book ever by neil gaiman.

Shit is worse than Tokio Hotel.

Pic related. It's how bad Tokio Hotel is.

>>2200119

WHAT IN THE HELL WHY IS HE TOUCHING HIS BROTHER'S PENIS

I THINK I WANT TO DIE NOW

>>2200225

Twincest is best, brah.