To get rid of that shit smell on your fingers that persists for days, rub your fingers with a stainless steel spoon.

Try not to use that spoon to eat ever again.

Wash your face with hot water and a microfiber cloth and simple soap like Cetaphil or Ivory. Rinse with cold water, use a moisturizer. The hot water opens up your pores and the microfiber is small enough to dig them out gently. The cold rinse settles your face down, closes up the pores again. Moisturizer just makes you look better, and prevents zits by giving your skin enough moisture so it doens't have to get greasy on its own.

Learned this the hard way.

To be awesome buy a cigar and sit outside on a rocking chair not giving a fuck.

to make thermite use a 1:2 weight ratio of aluminum powder to iron oxide

Pump your gas at the slowest setting- less air bubbles. Also pump it in the morning because it expands as the day gets warmer so you get a fuller tank.

A cold beer takes care of most hangovers.

>>2002944

You forgot to also become President and have it put in an iconic American pair of buildings.

keeping your ipod or zune in a sock is actually really convenient

peanut butter and powdered sugar sandwiches on buttered toast are delicious

smoking a lot of weed helps

>>2003003
to get rid of troofers expose them to actual civil engineers (caution may cause civil engineers to explode with rage)

A banana tree will "walk" during it's lifetime, so they leave space in the fields for this occurence.

All that time, as she put them in the washing machine, your mother knew why you always had one sock crustier than the other.

Find out where you stand with a female friend you like by placing your hand on her breast. If she's cool with it, you're in. If she freaks out or gets upset, did you really want to be in the friend-zone anyway?

Ecposives can be made by mixing salt Peter and sugar. Adding Bicard of soda and changing the ratio lets you make smoke bombs.

Nearly all drugs contain a benzene ring.

Most of the flavourings in your foods have literally never seen that food, they are entirely chemically enginered (pear drops my ass, they don't even taste like pears).

jack off on buses

If you ever hit a kritik of any kind, counter back with one about censorship and stress the need for intelligent discourse and an open flow of ideas.
A priori.

Just aiming for the toilet is infinently more effective than using a sock.

>>2003047

actually, most of the herb is underground the part above ground is the pseudostem, so when that dies and regrows it appears to be moving a bit

>>2003047
What??? Can you provide sauce?

votetuesdayblock

>>2003047
http://hubpages.com/hub/Walking-Banana-Plants

I just HAD to look into it, you understand! The idea that trees moved like that was too mind-blowing.

It's not like the truth isn't interesting, by itself, though. :)

Always choose scissors because people assume you will throw rock, so they will pick paper and you will win.

>>2002987
A cold beer solves most problems.

carrots flower after three years

Always eat before you drink.

As honest as your government is telling you there being, there really not.

cook an egg in the microwave in a coffee cup with a bit of milk, whip with a fork and cook for around a minute. put some cheese on top.

>>2003286
Unless by drink you mean water, in which case have a half glass to a glass of water before every meal.

>>2003316
What about the shell?

www.xnxx.com is by far the best place for porn.

there are small tabs on each end of the boxes for things like aluminum foil and plastic wrap. push these tabs in to prevent the roll from coming out of the box when pulling out the material.

almost anything you can cook in the oven you can cook in the microwave as long as it has water in it. Even cookies... they just come out a little odd and timing may not be what you expect.

>>2003414
related to this you can preheat water in the microwave to be used on the stove it will heat the water much faster

>>2003414
microwave cooking is lazy and tastes like shit.

During sexual intercourse, the last thing you want to do is flex the muscles in your legs.

>>2003525
The reasoning behind this good sir?

>>2003576

cramps that hurt like the beard of zeus tickling your anus.

Use a potato to unscrew a broken light bulb that's still in the socket

>>2003618
Oh I know what you mean. I caught a cramp fapping one time. So ronery ;~;

Pile up all the junk scattered around your room on your computer chair. Now you can either a) STAND and browse 4chan or b) actually clean that shit up.

>>2003576
Sore legs the next day, gets worse as you get older

When playing Rock Paper Scissors always announce you are going to pick rock, it mindfucks people and when you throw down rock they are fucked.

>>2003618

When I do this, feels good man.

>>2003696

maybe it mindfucks the retards you hang around with but normal people see right through that shit

Flavoring in Root Beer is half Wintergreen, half black licorice.

When eating cookies and milk, it is best to use a bowl instead of a cup. That way it's easier to dunk your cookies, and if you stir the milk with your cookie, it soaks up the milk faster - something you can't do in a cup.

Most of the people is willing to help you, you just have to know how to win them over

Fap with a lubricated condom.
Shit is at least more cash than the alternative.

also, don't re-use it goddamn what is wrong with you

Don't ever listen to someone who has something to sell to you.

Always pay any debt you have to your friends, as you get older friends become a rare comodity.

Wake up to quiet music 15 minutes earlier and cuddle with your pillows. It's easier to wake up.

>>2003784
I /knew/ it had wintergreen in it, half of my chem class didn't believe me when we made it, but it definately smelt like rootbeer.

Aslo, oil of wintergreen is the stuff in deep heat (I believe this is bengay in the US).

If your tumble drier has a cool down cycle, always let it go through this before taking out your clothes, otherwise there is a risk of fire. (this depends on the age of the machine);

Extended major in mathematics.

Chicks dig it.

Joining a sports team/club or anything of that sort will net you easy friends, whereas going to a dance club or a social event will be a bit tougher where everyone predetermines who they wanna hang out with and want to meet.

If you happen to ingest poison hemlock drink ten cups of coffee.

Wild carrot and osha look a lot like hemlock. Don't eat them.

>>2003348
katzporn.com

Sure, at xnxx.com you can download the tool that allows you to download streaming flash instantaneously, but Katz is good for it's purposes.

>>2003098
>Most of the flavourings in your foods have literally never seen that food
YOU'RE BLOWING MY MIND MAN

Lawn mower blade is reverse threaded

>>2003348
I agree with this. Redtube sucks.

Also, when making cup ramen, drain the water by using the top as a filter, and then adding a little bit of soy sauce to offset the dryness.

>>2002900
learn how to make money on the internet cuz it's easy

Fuck a cantaloupe. It's the closest you virginfags will ever get to having sex with a woman.

Hang-dry your clothes, they will last much longer.

Using the dryer ruins clothes. What do you think all that lint used to be?

>>2004029
Put a slice of lemon in your ramen. Always.

have the robots been to jitterville.com?

Masturbate when there's a chance you can get caught if you're not careful. Pretty fucking exciting.

>>2003618
>>2003525
I do this when I masturbate way to often and I can assure you unbelievers it is pretty painful.
I've yet to do it during sex, that being said I can't count how often I've masturbated but can count how often I've had sex on my two hands, so that has to do with it too.