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09/02/09(Wed)23:38 No.4867302Christianity
is totally metal! Shit, we've got fucking angels fighting bigass demons
with giant flaming swords and God bitchslapping people around whenever
they piss him off. Jesus was fucking NAILED to bits of wood and was
totally chill about it, bro. You've heard of this fucker King David? He
makes Leonidas look like a complete pussy. Bro killed GIANTS, man. He
got all the hos, and he was like the world's first fucking rockstar.
Plus there's this old guy, one of the prophets, shit I dunno his
name--but he fucking fed small children to a fucking BEAR because they
pissed him off. Also, count the number of people slaughtered in the
name of God. COUNT THEM, MOTHERFUCKER. Christianity is the most metal
fucking religion ever. |