do you make any effort in trying to inspire kids to learn.

Ever bone a student?

>>444074
Yes.

And it's successful, for the most part. Though I teach at a private school with money coming out the wazoo, so I generally have a pool of motivated students.

>>444077
Nope.

>>444079

I read this as a response to >>444077 and it was quite comical

But then I was disappoint :(

Do you read genre fiction to unwind from all that Steinbeck, Orwell, Bronte, etc?

>>444081
Hahaha. Oh lawdy.

....if only......

>>444084
Well, I teach four classes. AP English (mostly 12s, some 11s) Accelerated English 10 (English for tenth graders who actually give a fuck about the subject) and two sections of Freshmen English.

For AP, I pretty much teach what I'm told to and don't have much of a say in curriculum.

For the 10 grade, I do what I want. I teach the only section of this class, so basically I can throw in any book I want. It's my favorite class by far. This year we've read The Bell Jar, Siddartha, Othello, Waiting for Godot and a bunch of poetry. Just got finished with two weeks on Waste Land, shit was so cash.

For the freshmen it's Catcher, Hamlet, Odyssey, Tale of Two Cities (uuugh) and a bunch of short stories. What I do here (and for all my classes, but most common in these two) is if a student doesn't like a book, they can choose one of their own and I give assignments based on this choice. I really like this system, as do the students.

>>444079

> I teach at a private school

Well, there goes every thing I had to say to you.

>>444084
I didn't really answer your question...

Well, I encourage students to read other books (see my policy) and so yes, a lot of students take advantage of this and read genre-fiction. Five of my fresh-people are reading Dune, which made me smile.

>>444101
Huurrrp Derp! Havin money means you're a stuck-up prick! Durrrr-hurrr! Being wealthy is inherently bad!

>>444102
That's cool, but I meant do YOU read it?

>>444107
Oh wow. For an English teacher I fail at reading comp...

Yeah, I do some. Though I used to feel self-conscious about reading things that weren't 'fine literature' (most genre-fiction, ie Neuromancer), but then I sacked up.

>>444072

Any advice to a literature major thinking of teaching high school or university?

How easy is it to be a teacher in America? You don't have a good education system like we euopeans have, propbably beacause you don't do ist how Humboldt suggested.

english teachers on 4chan is weird mang

because now i imagine my old english teachers going "shit was so cash"

>>444118
Well with that sort of major, your options are obviously limited. I'm not saying that only morons become English majors, but only morons choose to major in English/lit and expect a wide array of career choices.

But you hopefully already know this.

Anywho, I love my job, I really do. I knew I would, and I imagine if you would enjoy being a teacher, you'll know it. This is only my second year teaching, but god I love it.

As for my advice, keep some diversity. I imagine literature isn't your only interest, take classes in other things. I all but double majored in theater, and that diversity really helped my prospects.

And choose a school very fucking carefully. Do you want to teach those who need it most but for the most part don't want it? Inner-city. Do you want those troubled kids? Bunch of private schools for those people. I chose the swankiest private school in the city because (well for one I was hired) and I wanted to teach and advise those who want to learn.

>>444124
I'm 26 and teaching, no government certification. That's the beauty of some private schools: they more look at your time student teaching and simply you as a whole.

Wasn't difficult at all, but then again I was highly motivated.

>>444138

I want to teach the exact demographic you teach: kids who are interested in learning. At the moment I'm toying with the idea of dual majoring in either philosophy, psychology, or classics along with comparative lit. And yeah, I realize my career options are basically teaching or some shitty desk job so I'm going all out on the teaching path.

European studying to become a high school english teacher (second language, so). I take it you're American? To what extent do you teach grammar/linguistics/phonetics?

>>444150
If you dual major, I'd go with whatever interests you most.

However, philosophy would probably be the most helpful in getting a job.

As for getting a job with said demographic, all I can say is that it wasn't as hard as I imagined. I student-taught at a school much like the one I teach at now, and was the assistant to this lazy fuck and I ended up doing a good deal of the teaching for three months. Got a killer recommendation and smooth sailing from there.

Don't be afraid: the 'best' schools (high test scores, college acceptance etc.) don't have the 'best' or most experienced teachers. I just went to one of these schools and pretty much acted like myself and got a job.

One more thing: the economy is shitte and that helped me. Four teachers are getting laid-off at my school next year, and I was almost one, but I avoided the axe because of my theater experience. Meaning next year I'll be teaching a class on playwrights as I was deemed qualified. More work, no more pay, but still have a job.

But keep in mind: I am one lucky mother-fucker.

I had a connection to the school, my friend from highschool is head of the language department, I got lucky student teaching and I got lucky getting a job period.

Best of luck!

>>444188

Awesome, thanks for the advice. Philosophy was my main choice for the dual major so I'm thinking I'll go with that and just work my ass off for a job similar to yours.

>>444169
In my freshmen classes: extensively.

In the others,not so much. Don't let your lack of linguistic mastery discourage you: there's this woman from Panama teaching English 11. She's fluent in English, but just by speaking with her it's clear that she isn't fully immersed grammatically. My freshmen could probably score better on a grammar exam than her.

But she still has a job teaching English and does a damn fine job.

Why don't you assign A Game of Thrones to your students?

>>444212
Never read it.

OP hasn't answered the most pertinent question:

are you wizard

>>444232
no

Why do you persist trying to teach Shakespeare to kids? That shit is not for fucking kids. The forced teaching of Will has probably turned more people away from reading than anything else.

>>444251
Most of them enjoy it.

srsly

How do you feel about you never leaving school?

>>444260
Indifferent. And I'm only 26, so the patheticness of that hasn't really set-in yet.

>>444266
youllnever leave

>>444095
Why is AP so restricted? I took AP english in MA and our teacher had us read a bunch of random shit, and we just wrote a ton of papers on motifs, tone, etc.

>>444341
What I mean is I don't have much choice in terms of what books we read. There are four AP English classes and the department, understandably, wants a uniform curriculum. As I am a new teacher, it's mostly determined by others.

>>444188
So, nepotism, basically.

>>444251
What? Are you kidding Shakespear is perfect for teenagers, there are fucking boner jokes in there. Just make sure your students understand that.

Who wouldn't you recommend teaching to as a career? (assuming they have the qualifications)

I think I could be good at teaching English and I've been told to seriously consider it. I'm starting an MA in English Literature and Spanish in the UK this september, but I'm just fucking terrified in case I'm not the right kind of person to teach, or I end up in some shithole where the kids wouldn't hesitate to knife me.

Have you ever been attracted to a student?
Have you ever had to comfort a student?
Have you ever been enthralled by a student's personal growth?
How do you distance yourself while maintaining an important mentor type relationship?

//Inb4 Don't stand so close to me.

>>444415

DON'T STA- oh.

>>444377
Phhh. Even if this were so, should I have turned down the job?

>>444407
Did you enjoy school? If you hated it, I mean hated the concept/environment not just the pricks and sillyness, I imagine you wouldn't be fond of teaching. You need to either get along with others or be comfortable on your own because it is a pretty fucking social job.

You should know if you're 'the right kind of person' I think. As for 'shitholes', I'm friends with one guy who teaches in a 'shithole' and he says he knows the people who he can teach and those he needs to leave alone (the knifers).

>>444415
What is this --I don't even...

>>444424
>>444415
Is there some reference I am missing?

Do the find the books students choose really differ or are they all around the same reading level? In public schools the difference in reading levels is huge even if kids are in the same class, so I was wondering if they were a bit closer considering it's a private school.

>>444481

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Zp3LPRzuXo

Sting used to be a teacher, and wrote this about a colleague.

>>444481

Fail teacher is fail

Strong words in the staffroom
The accusations fly.....

Do you worry about becoming institutionalised? Or did you have a different job in-between graduating and teaching?

>>444516

Fucking great song.

>>444481

You're not the cool teacher are you :(

>>444485
Do you mean the books a student reads rather than/in addition to the curriculum? My policy I mentioned?

If so, yeah; there's some difference. I mean, I admit my policy appears to be an easy-way-out for some students. The lazy little shitte that doesn't want to read Hamlet so he tells me he'll read some easy trash instead? Well most people who have that sentiment are too lazy to take the initiative to choose their own book so they stick with what is assigned.

But I have difficulty with what you're asking as I've never understood the concept of 'reading level'. I mean, I'll be the first to say that Tolstoy is on a higher plane than say OSC, but they both have amazing books.

>>444518
I was an assistant director at a local --but successful--theater company for 18 months. Otherwise, no.

>>444543
Hehe...Not a big fan of Sting. But I like to think I'm pretty well liked among the students.

That said, I am probably 26 years behind on popular culture.

>>444547
Tell us the kind of music you like

>>444555
Oy...very eclectic styles, but very few artists.
In order in which they come to mind:

Warren Zevon
The Kinks
The Clash
Alice Cooper
Redgum
Johnny Cash
Social Distortion
Billy Idol
Big Audio Dynamite
Radiohead
Queen
Hank Williams


Those are really the only artists that have more than 5 songs on my computer.

>>444569

>English teacher
>Theatre director
>Likes music such as The Kinks, Radiohead, Queen and The Clash

Marry me?

>>444578
Hmmmm...gender?

>>444586
Actually forget that, i don't care.

So ronery...

LOL

which region of the country. if you dont mind disclosing

>>444592
Kansas City, Missouri side

>>444578
I like those things too but not enough to propose via 4chan. You must be fat and/or ugly.

>>444590

HA! Female, Sir.

OP here, tripping it up.

>>444595

Neither, I have a boyfriend, I merely express my admiration through marriage proposals.

It gets complicated, I'll admit.

share some stories of difficult students.

>>444597
Oh if only...

>>444597
Call me sir too.

Call me your majesty.

Let me knight you.

Wear my crown.

>>444602
Feel-good stories, rage stories or lul stories?

WHY DID YOU MAKE ME READ HEMINGWAY'S SHORT STORIES!?
they're really awful dude.

>>444607
wat

Never even read those myself, let alone assigned them.

>>444604

I LOLd hard, but no, you lost me at "wear my crown" I'm afraid, that's a worrying euphamism.

>>444610
they disgusted me from the books.
They're just a bunch of well written but still pretentious crap.

>>444384

Lol.

>>444605
rage stories if you have them.

i know i was a pretty rage inducing student in my high school english class.

I read The Scarlet Letter when I was in Highschool, I still think it's awful.

>>444621
>>444620
>>444607
>>444604
>>444601
>>444597
>>444597
>>444595
Oh lawd, what goin awn in my thread?

>>444626
Rage it is.

Early on in my first year, I, god knows why, had the novel idea for an assignment: I asked my students to think of a song to describe a character in The Odyssey.

There were some really interesting answers, but even more that just made me 'wat'.

The best was someone chose "Don't Stop Believing" for Odysseus. At first I raged, then I laughed and then...oh god it still baffles me.

A particularly rage answer was from this proto-feminazi who chose some shitty song about the genocidein Darfur to describe Penelope.

Yup. I know.

Her reasoning was that it was the greatest injustice in the story. No shit the story's sexist but...wat

Lemme think of some more....

>>444660
this actually sounds fun, my pics:
Odysseus - My Way
Penelope - Where Have all the cowboys gone
Telemachus - CRAWWWLING in my SKIIIIIN
Cyclops - anything by Bolt Thrower

Just a general rage, last year there was this English teacher that was pretty batshit insane with her feminism and political correctness. I mean changing pronouns, herstory, the whole sha-bang. Anyway, despite being so gender-conscious and a supposed English teacher....she loved Twilight.

She got laid-off though

:)

>>444677

Brilliant.

>herstory

LOL

>>444677

You should start a new thread of just these.

>>444677
Thank God.

I wish I'd had you as an English teacher, you seem charming, rather then my teacher who spelt 'definitely' with an 'a' :|

>>444677
>herstory

7/10, would rage again.

>>444682
And obviously didn't teach you the difference between then and than

>>444682

My old teacher couldn't spell for toffee, it made me raeg at the time so bad. I'd also like you as a teacher, OP.

Here's some troll-rage.

There's this brilliant girl in my AP class, always been fond of her. Anyway, in preparation for the AP exam, we've been doing some exercises with tone and style. I give the class Swift's A Modest Proposal and ask the students to write about Swift's views and intentions in writing the piece.

So the girl turns in hers (which is thrice as long as the required 600 words) and it's all about the horrors of famine and how man is still at the mercy of nature.

Confused, I write a longass comment asking what the fuck is up with her.

She troll'd me bad.

This probably doesn't sound as funny in the retelling,but god damn it was.

>>444688
>>444682
<3

>>444685

>>444689
i did the same thing on an assignment. don't remember the original question, but i tried to write like a christian evangelical pretending to be a prophet.

the teacher called me into the hallway during the next class and just asked "why are you doing this" with a pained look on his face. i just lol'd

>>444689
This girl wouldn't happen to be a quiet brunette, would she?

>>444694

>quiet brunette

They always are...

>>444692
greatest comic strip writer ever.

Do you take a class in child psychology, or am I just fucking stupid?

>>444694
No, an Indian with black hair (obviously)

>>444705
Hahhaah
>>444708
I don't know enough to say you're stupid, but I haven't taken any classes on it yet (I am taking something like that this summer).

Sup. I'm bumping and you can load up on questions, but I'll be off for a few hours. Keep the thread alive if interested. If not; keep on trollin'

Awesome thread. I'm digging it. It's getting me excited to become a teacher.

OP is back....if anyone cares

>>446064
Do you have any wapanese kids in your class?

>>444072
Do you ever lament the fact that you failed in your goal to be a college professor/writer?

Hey there OP.

I'm very proficient at debate and abstract/critical thinking. I'm considering going into either teaching or lawyering.

Tell me why I should be a teacher.

>>446099
you'll get paid half as much to deal with 16 year olds and get no respect towards your career

>>446099
Oh, forgot to add. I'm really good at Speech and Debate.

>>446064

Will you take my stories and teach them to your class so that I become famous? Please?

>>446064
What are your thoughts on the tradition of compulsory schooling being detrimental to thought and a tool of the state to indoctrinate?

A short summation of where I'm coming from if you're unfamiliar: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xq6lFOhLJ0c

>>444072
I remember the only good english teach I ever had was a 27 year old dude who had virtually the same taste in film and music as me. I was the only person in my humanities class who wasn't there because they needed a class filled or because it was an AP course but because I actually gave a shit about the subject. I recall that he hated me. He once told the class that I never shut the hell up and the only reason he doesn't interrupt me is cuz I made good points. I remember after that he had us all make collages about war, and I closed my eyes and picked images at random, and when he called me on it I pointed out that all collages are random images, the patterns are perceived but don't actually exist. He said it was BS,

So I snuck into his his office after school, set his desk on fire and got expelled. That summer I took a shit on his porch.

>>444692

lold

>>446115
lol noam chomsky, you so crazy

>>446080
No

>>446097
Was never my goal. Honest

>>446115
You're just pushing your thoughts in an irrelevant thread.

Also, you are gay.

>>446117
Cool story.

OP IS ACTUALLY BACK NOW! POST QUESTIONS! I BE HERE ALL NIGHT!

I'm French, have an UK BSc in Computer Science and will soon have a PhD in CS.

During my PhD I've taught at undergrad level and some grad courses, but I'd like teaching science or maths (preferably the latter) in high school.

I don't have any teaching diplomas or anything though.

Do I have any chance at a private school hiring me?

this thread was good for awhoile, but last 10 or so posts are silly

>>446319
I think so. What country are you planning on teaching in?

>>446332
United States

(I'm engaged to my (american citizen) girlfriend (hopefully that whole annual visa renewing mess will end), wedding due after I finish my PhD)

>>446349
Yeah, I'm thinking your credentials should serve you well. But you'll need more info on your experience. I mean you may need more.

Fuck I am drunk....