at the interview, make sure to wear tight jeans and a see through shirt

>>34236995 (OP)
expect this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CjVVNuraly8

pepper your angus, you enter the homoseks headquarters

You might want to suck off a hobo on your way there. I hear cock-breath is a huge plus.

>>34237015
Make sure to mention that you love sucking cawk and taking it up the ass from fat sweaty hermaphrodites.

In a more serious note it's just like working in any other major retail store with the exception that you're basically pushing only one product instead of a plethora or products. You get to see a lot of technologically illiterate people come in as well, more so than BB

>>34237097
>product
I meant brand. You get the gist of it.

Enjoy your subscription to various gay porn sites.

>>34236995 (OP)
>going to work at an Apple store
>how can I stand out from other applicants

You qualify for the job.

>>34237015
>>34237046
>>34237097

Yeah yeah, I get it Apple is gay. I've spent an irresponsible amount of time arguing Mac vs Windows vs GNU/Linux in the past, so I figure it would be pretty easy to sell stupid people play-computers. Plus, a guy I work with now said they pay like $14/hr staring (making min $7.50/hr currently)

>>34237062
You get a 10% discount in all products.

Former apple store employee here.

Act like you know a lot about computers and Macs, but don't throw buzzwords around unless you can back up what you're saying. You'll look like a dingus if you're caught spouting shit and you can't explain what it means. That being said, if you know a lot about macs and can back up what you say, feel free to throw around buzzwords like it's no-one's business.

You should look like you're into the "Mac-Culture", because customers will probably gravitate towards you. Don't go full on hipster, look very professional, confident, and content to be working.

Any other questions?

>>34237195
Hm. Yet the tech blogosphere always talks about how Apple store employees are severely underpaid.

>>34237226
>have product knowledge
>look confident, professional
welcome to every job ever.

>>34237226
when i get cummed inside, do I hold it in, let it drain out while i work, or dispose of it in the bathroom?

>hurr gay expect a dick up your anus
Deal with it guys, in modern society working in an Apple store equals rockstar status so if anything being heterosexual is a bonus point. Girls flirt with me all the time and if I demo some stupid iPhone app and say "my iPhone can also store phone numbers, what is yours? ;)" there is not a girl who doesn't smile and give it to me.

Regarding to working, there are really only a few people who walk in an Apple store and do not buy anything. They made well informed decissions at home and whether their budget will allow it so they only come to physically try their product. You will only have to talk them in which model exactly it is that they want and which accessories to buy them. If you can talk fairly well, it is a nobrainer.

i worked at an mall apple store here in detroit.

i found it incredibly difficult because my manager wanted me to "look" busy, and i could NEVER find anything to do. so i ended up doing a lot of busy work like cleaning the display screens and shit.

i worked there for like 5 months then i quit, so it wasnt as if it was a bad job, just super boring because 99% of the time people come in just to look at the shit . and they're normally 11

>>34237269
you are getting friendzoned because they think you're gay

>>34237268
You wipe if off with your finger then gently lick your finger clean.

>>34237281
>look busy

Apple stores have a lot of heavy foot-traffic. When the manager said "look busy" they probably wanted you to go up to people and try to sell them the shit. There's always someone to talk to in an Apple store.

>>34237289
Keep thinking that while you rice your Arch installation, loser.

>>34237226

So, don't go full hipster?

I'm not a fat neck beard, but I'm not what people would consider a "cool" looking guy, nothing really stands out. I have a vague idea, but what would you suggest to look the part?

And they actually want someone who knows the computers? I've heard otherwise, that they would prefer people better at customer service.

>>34237269

So, might it be necessary for me to actually own an iPhone? Because they're stupid expensive and wasteful.

I remember back then with the Flash debate going to Apple Stores and putting all the mobile iDevices like ipads iphones their browser on adobe.com/getflash or something like that. Fun was had.

>>34237281
Wow I can image the demographics of your costumers since it's Detroit

>>34237269
>working in an Apple store equals rockstar status
With a Burger King salary,

>>34236995 (OP)

>Buzzwords
>I like penis
>Please boss fuck me now

>>34237378
Wait, you do not already have an iPhone? Didn't they ask you in the interview to tell you something about why you would want to work in an Apple store? What did you say?

>>34237258
>>34237391

Well, the only reason I'd want to work there is the pay. If my friend is wrong and they only really pay minimum wage, it wouldn't be worth it.

>>34237386
the black people were never the problem. it was the young white kids who would come in with a group of friends straight outa 6th grade. all take out their iphones and start fucking around on the imacs

the black people normally bought everything on credit or Billmelater, so it wasnt OUR problem when they didnt pay, which was ok with me

>>34237428
They do have an artificial reality distortion field in every apple store. They transmit this through airport. It's like having Job's ghost whispering into your ear all day.

>>34237426

I didn't apply yet, I'm just wondering what to expect so I can add a cherry onto my already excellent customer service, salesmanship, and people-person personality.

>>34237269
>walk into an Apple store
>made well informed decisions
whoah, slow down there. bro

>>34237468
just like any other sales job, be the best shill you can be

>>34237426

Also, I would mention how well Apple treats its customers and how once they step into the store, they become like part of the Apple family.

>>34237468
>my already excellent customer service, salesmanship, and people-person personality.
>/g/
nice try

>>34237525

How does knowing the product inside and out, and being able to convince others it isn't utter crap not qualify as excellent salesmanship?

>>34237428
Contrary to popular believe working in an Apple store isn't about financial or materialistic factors like wage. It is the enjoyment you get by working for the most innovative and ground breaking company ever to stand on the face of planet Earth. Every day I work - even if it is a dull task like explaining why iOS is better than Android - I can have this warm tingling feeling in my heart knowing that I am part of something bigger than most of us can fathom and there is no financial compensation worth exactly that.

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>>34237563

>>34237563
>warm tingling penis in my anus..
FTFY

>>34237563

OP here. Yes, Anon. That's the kind of stuff I'm looking for!

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>>34237563
good goy

>>34237468
Well there will be a question about why you want to work here so you better prepare for some drama to throw at the interviewer about how as a kid you were dreaming of Macs and couldn't stand PCs, hos you saw the iPhone stand at the forefront of smartphones as we know them today, how you cried when Steve Jobs died et cetera.

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>>34236995 (OP)
>Going to work at an Apple Store

I have experience. It is currently my job.

>Should I really into the whole "Mac-culture"?
If you have already been hired then no. Once you start working there you tend to not put up the front of caring about the "culture" after your first six months. Your co-workers usually prefer you be yourself instead of some cool aid drinking sheep.

>What are some buzzwords I can use to make myself stand out from other applicants?

If you have had past retail experience just mention that you didn't really worry about numbers and selling the biggest and baddest thing possible but finding the perfect solution for the customer was key. MAKE SURE YOU USE THE PHRASE "PERFECT SOLUTION".

Anyway. That's how I got in.
Starting pay is decent.
Roughly $16.00 if you live in Commiefornia. Don't know about other places.

Good luck.

If you know the time your interview will be had, be sure to set an alarm with the sound of an incomming iMessage. This way, you do not even have to show them your iPhone as it will be obvious you have one. Just smile and say "Oh let me turn that off" and turn it "off" under the table.

On a serious note, if you want to stand out show that you have above average computer knowledge and are potentially fit for anything better than just sales. Try and aim for genius position. This means you know the difference between cpu and ram and basic stuff.

You don't want to come across as too much of an Apple fanboy. That just gives the impression you have no life. You're not heavily in the culture but like Mac because there is a culture.

You will perpetuate the mindset that is in the Mac vs Pc commercials. Apple helps you be creative, smart and cool. Business is streamlined on a Mac and clunky on a PC.

You have to be enthusiastic. You're not selling a customer a computer, you're selling a friend an experience.

Hope this helps. I applied at an Apple store, got accepted as a creative/genius but then found a better paying job. I still get calls and emails from them.

>>34237682
Why "perfect solution"? Why not, best solution?

>>34236995 (OP)
synergize

>>34237706
If you are stupid enough as this when making a first impression, remember to turn cell off so you don't get real notifications coming through

>>34237563
Cook shills pls go

ITT: neets roleplaying they work at Apple

no way we have that many apple store idiots here

if more than five people post proof they actually work there I will fill myself a ban request for /g/ on /q/

>>34237748
>notifications

Lol bro I don't even have a smart phone.

http://gizmodo.com/5812622/working-at-the-apple-store-tales-from-the-inside

Doesn't seem that bad.

>>34237762

>being this autistic

>>34237762
does working at apple HQ count?

>>34236995 (OP)
Dont you need two weeks of training in Cupertino to work there? Or is that just the "Genius's".

>>34237722
That is the phrasing we use internally.

It is a bunch of bullshit but if you say that you will stand out.

>Things they care about when interviewing
Personality
How approachable you are


>Shit they don't care about
How well you can sell things.
How tech savvy you are.
How many Apple products you own.


They can teach you about Apple products but if you are an asshole they can't change that.

So yeah.

Be careful.

>>34237774
>lol
>bro
>>>/r/eddit

>>34237799
Just the Genius's get that training.

Everyone else (Genius and Managers included) go through whats called "Core".
Essentially its 75% Propaganda and 25% useful skills to help you through your day to day tasks.

>>34237563
tfw people like this actually exist

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>>34237710
>You're not selling a customer a computer, you're selling a friend an experience.

So being an Apple Inc.™ shill is a /g/ freedom respecting job?

OP here, this is some great stuff guys, thank you. What about the actual hiring process? Is it strictly online or can it be in store? Do I need a resume?

>>34237919

It's a "I need to make money and I know about computers" job.

>>34237947
I would take a resume

>>34237842
Does Apple have some good propaganda that sets it apart or is it the usual, "our company is great and wants to help people with our products."?

>>34237919
If you are worried about Freedom in your job search you may find yourself penniless or living in a box. Swallow your pride and whore yourself. You can feel pride and respect after you cash your paycheck.

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>>34237269
>"my iPhone can also store phone numbers, what is yours? ;)"

I worked at an apple store for about a year in 2008. It was a group interview of about 9-10 people. They asked each of us to talk about what we use at home. I lied and told them i had a macbook pro with an airport and a bunch of other apple shit. They liked it.

The people I interviewed with were dressed really nice but I decided to go dressed as a hipsterfag with thick rimmed glasses and dirty sneakers. It fucking worked. Out of our interview group, they picked me and some other short kid to work.

The job itself was pretty fucking boring. They track how much Applecare you sell with every idevice you sell, if you only sell macs then the manager will have a 'meeting' with you to discuss what you're doing wrong. My asshole coworkers would try to pawn off indians/jews to me because we know they won't buy insurance. White people were the ideal customer.

There were brainwash sessions every 6 months where the entire store had to participate in 'team building' exercises which was pretty much just 3 hours of circlejerking about why apple is so amazing and the competition isn't

My store was so busy all the time that it was impossible to keep track of who was on the floor and who wasn't, so I sometimes just went home in the middle of a shift, took a nice shit, ate lunch, and went back. Nobody ever noticed.

If you have any questions OP feel free to ask.

if I own an android phone, am I not allowed to work there?

>>34237947
It is an online application only.

Yes you need a resume.

The interviewing process is pretty extensive. At least it was for me.

>First interview
Group interview in the presentation hall of a nearby hotel.
40+ people there for the same job.

>Second interview
Met the management of the store I would be hired at.
Myself and 9 other people in this interview.

>Third interview
Different managers this time.
Myself and 5 others.

>Fourth
Store leader (top manager) and a senior manager
Myself and 3 others.

>Fifth
Store leader and market lead (oversees four-five stores)
Myself and one other person.

>Sixth (final) interview
Myself and market lead only.


These posts are all mine.
>>34237682
>>34237812
>>34237842

And to >>34237983

Meh its pretty much the same. There is a skill they teach they surprisingly has helped me in countless situations when arguing with someone. Called the (gag) Apple steps of service.

So yeah. Its mostly bullshit but if you get hired I would pay attention. It is worth it.

>>34238040
>White people were the ideal customer.
After dealing with cheap Indian assholes and scamming thugs I am left wondering if there is any job where this statement doesn't hold true.

you could argue on how Microsoft's OEM products suck.

>>34238067
If they aren't watching for competitors products during the interview they aren't doing their job. With all the issues they've had with Samsung I'd assume that owning a Galaxy would get you taken out back for a special interview session with the Apple iBat.

are there any perks to working for them? ie: 'x' amount off of in-store purchases or the like?

>>34238040
Fucking this.
>>34238085 is me.

Most people for me went in very professional outfits for the interviews. I went in some maroon vans, slightly ripped jeans, a cool looking t-shirt, and a blazer. Fucking worked.

The bullshit with Applecare and how much you sell is pretty diminished. At least at my store it is. Our management seems to not worry all that much.

The brainwash sessions got moved up to once every quarter.

Luckily I got off sales about 8 months ago to a nice behind the scenes job.

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>>34238166
>>34238166
>Apple iBat

>>34238040
>They asked each of us to talk about what we use at home.

Damn, that migh be tough. I own an iPod, so I guess I'll need to do some research on other products.

>The people I interviewed with were dressed really nice but I decided to go dressed as a hipsterfag with thick rimmed glasses and dirty sneakers. It fucking worked

I dont know if I can be this bold.