hahahah

by the way, nice headset.

im envious.

>>4828897
go away

/g/ - childhood stories


Also, Cool story, bro

you just wanted to see this reaction image, didn't you.

Oh man, this brings back memories. I loved fucking with retards. There was this one at my school who would always pick up change, any change, We'd always throw pennies under the coke machines and watch that faggot run across the cafeteria and try to grab them from under the machines. OR once we superglued a quarter to a table, dumbshit was scratching at it for like 20 minutes.

Fucking hilarious

I RATHER ENJOYED YOUR STORY; I AM NOT GOING TO LIE, GOOD SIR.

your a dick.
cool story bro?

There's this kid I know, his name is Ray. I always knew who he was, but I was never exposed to him until I was a senior and he was a freshman. He has aspergers or something. He was one of those smart retards.

One day he got switched to my study hall, and sat down at my table with all my friends. It was basically all over by that point. He just said some of the craziest shit, most of the stuff he says could probably become memes because of the lulz factor.

He was just that retarded kid in the hall who you'd give high fives too. I remember I gave him my phone number when he wanted it, and everyday he would call me and I'd talk to him for a few minutes, but if I was blazed I'd sit there, watch TV, and talk to him for like a whole half hour. He'd say the craziest shit, like he was going to take a fenced in area in his backyard and make a concentration camp for all the Special Ed kids he hates.

One day he called and wanted me and my friend to come over really bad, we were high, his parents weren't home, so we stopped by his house to make him happy for 10 minutes on the way to somewhere. Apparently they give him Hydrocodones every morning to chill his crazy ass out. I was like "Ray what are these for?" and he told me they were to help him breathe better. Needless to say I told him I was having trouble breathing and I took a few.


He actually looked up to me, I like the kid to be honest. I was like his life coach sometimes. He was in Special Ed and used to make fun of all the other retards and impersonate their weird retarded voices. He had the most manly facial hair too at age 15. If he didn't shave for like 3 days he'd have a full black beard and he had facial hair almost up to his eyes. He was basically a retarded jew and a fucking Riot.

My favorite story with him is when he used the N-bomb one day in school. Me and my friends would scream "Nagger!" at eachother (mispronounced version of nigger) and Ray started saying it too, which was extra lulz. One day he was waiting for the bus and he called some black Special Ed girl a Nagger and got in trouble. He told his aides that It wasn't "Nigger" it was "Nagger" and he told them he learned it from me. He had to sign a piece of paper with a whole bunch of crazy shit he wasn't allowed to do anymore and one of the sentences read something like; "I will not blame Joe Davies for any of my actions."

I love Ray

>>4828958
his dick is what? what's wrong with it? there isn't even a picture.

>>4828958


Enough of this.

More of this>>4828982

when i was in grades 6/7 there was this kid named colton. fucker would eat anything, pears dipped in barbecue AND marina sauce, grapes with ketchup, etc. obviously he was one fat motherfucker. lazy too, he was the only kid in the fucking school who got 0s on his report card, but somehow he still made it through the grades. one time, he was chasing some kid who was making fun of him (even though everyone makes fun of him) through the halls and he knocked some girl out of her wheelchair.

oh man that dude was funny

There was this lad 2 or 3 year younger than me, his face was completly covered in black heads and spots. He was absolutely filthy and stank like the pits of hell. I don't think I ever saw him without a layer of filth on him, I don't think he ever cleaned his uniform. I wouldn't mind if he was filthy because his family had fuck all money, but he was a chain smoker too so he easily could have just not got fags for a day and go to a dry cleaner instead. He'd always hang out with young lads because no one his own age would associate with him and he'd always try to act like big man, which he constantly failed at.

He got suspended for wanking in class. It wasn't just some sort of rumor no one is actually sure really happened, he got caught right in the act. His hand tightly gripped around his cock pulling away like a mad man. He'd always try to buy hash off me too, even though every time he tried I'd explain to him slowly I don't deal. But he just kept at it. Annoying bastard.

There's this weird kid named Daniel who goes to my school, and he is THE weirdest kid ever. He recently got a haircut, but doesn't like it so he wears his hood at all times. His voice is redneck/retarded and he has no friends.

This guy told me he was going to kill me by setting up "trray-ups" in his yard which will kill me "slowly but painfully enough." WTF? Who says that?

Also, this chick named Jennifer who is the most disgusting woman I have seen in my entire life. She is fat, and has massive rolls and short curly hair and the face of a deer yuck. The sad fact is, she has had many boyfriends, I do not know how. Most of them are mentally retarded though, no joke, she spits game at special ed kids. She's been made fun of for years in my town, because of that and also because she has a redneck trashy family.

Sean, is another kid. He dated the aforementioned, and also has many many problems. First of all, he is the creepiest guy to ever live. He has weird ass eyes and his facial expression is always in pissed off mode. He is in the navy, and because of that they would let him carry his gun and crap with other navy kids at the football games during the pledge, it was super gay and scary because what if that serial killer psycho flipped and killed a baby or some shit?!

Also, he masturbates in class. He cuts holes in his pocket so that he can reach in and get his dick. This dude actually finishes, does he like having clue goo all in his pants and wearing that? YUCK man.

Freshman year there was a fat girl in my class, who ALSO had the nickname shrek, rofl kids are so unoriginal.

Anyway, there was this one girl in my lunch period sophomore year, she was fucking enormous like 300lbs. We always used to tease each other about her being "your booty call".

So one day, the class clown goes into the boys bathroom, laughing his ass off. We all kinda looked at each other and were like "oh god what now..". Next thing we know, he's sprinting out of the bathroom, belt undone fly semi unzipped holding a condom filled with a suspicious clear gooey substance, a few people had noticed him running out but no one liked this girl enough to warn her.

Her back was towards him and her VERY jewy friend who was facing her had her head down. He placed the condom on her shoulder and zipped up his fly as he ran away. SHE DIDN'T NOTICE until i said teasing my one friend "oh dude looks like shes been cheating on you" at which she perked up..turned around screamed,cried, and threw the condom off her shoulder onto her jew friends hair. The whole room was ROFL literally.

In the end no one told the school who did it, so the kid wasn't even expelled, god we were a sick bunch.

Also there's one kid who fucked a dead deer. And a different kid who fucked his mom and sister. Both kids were walked in on by their former close friends, which is how word got out.

There was this one retard at my school that had to wear a helmet/mask. He'd just sit around and bang his head against shit. Anyway, one day he fucking vomitted, but having a full face mask it just st there, against his face. It was so fucking gross.

There was this one kid i went to school with(BTW this happened outside of school) Anyways, I was sitting in my yard at the age of maybe 7 or so and i see my brother running down the street as fast as a fucking mexican. Shortly following my brother is this kid whom id known from school, completely naked, he had shit in his hands and on him and he was chasing my brother. Well, my brother ran to my house and went inside. Meanwhile i stayed outside on the yard still and this kid ran up to the front door and whipped Shit all over the front door

Oh god this thread is awesome

/g/ - Stories From Your "Childhood" Which Probably Happened This Past School Year

We had this autistic kid, he was adorable.

His name was Andrew, and he would scream and beat you if you clicked at him.

Once, we were sitting at lunch in 8th grade and he was trying to explain to a kid that he couldn't eat his tator tots cause he was on a diet, then some jock fag started clicking at him... Andrew reached across the table, grabbed the kids head, and smashed it against the table, it was great.

Also, one rainy day at school, I was hurrying along the sidewalk, and he walked by me, and just whispers "satan" and runs off.

I giggled.

>>4828982

OP's a faggot, you are a champion.

Anyone else have retards who were overweight and pulled their pants down to their shins at urinals?

there was this mentally handicapped kid that everyone named Mr. Death back in highschool. He used to run around asking everyone if they wanted to die or would ask if they wanted to run the death lap (run around the track until you die.) He would run up to any group and would just start yelling (they let the retards run free at my high school) "50 YARDS! UP AGAINST THE WALL, 50 YARDS! YOU WANNA RUN THE DEATH LAP? RAHHHH!"

He always acted like he was going to hit you by cocking hist fist back and making some gnarly face. Then one day he actually hit a kid, and the kid beat the shit out of him. We all "testified" it was self defense because Mr. Death knocked him first.

i wish I could show you guys pictures because this dude was insane! he was a tiny platinum blonde, blue eyed, kid with horse teeth and massive braces and terrible acne. He was also the pimp of the retards, he had a different retarded female following him every single time you saw him, it was crazy.
then there was this black retard who was, no lie, 7'2 and would start crying 15 seconds. he also had such a soft voice you were forced to listen to him.
high school was retarded.

in my highschool there was a program for retards called the LARKS. They even bussed larks in from other school districts and there was 2 classrooms set aside for them. We used to call things larky and lark-tastic and run around yelling lark lark lark and bump into lockers. A few of them started copying us and would run around yelling lark lark lark. It was epic

We had a foreign exchange student from China come here but he was sent back home 2 months later because the host that kept him at his house found him on top of his 5 year old daughter trying to take his boxers off.

And we have a group of kids that think theyre emo and try to get attention but they all laugh and have friends and are not really depressed. Instead of cutting themselves the light a match and put it on their fingertip for like 3 seconds and say its worse than cutting yourself. Also whatever happened to the goth kids?

OP you look like a slut just kicked out of a concentration camp, what the fuck

I'm pretty sure this kid is autistic. He rarely talks, when he does it doesn't make a whole lot of sense or is random. Anyway, he's kind of just one of those goofy kids in the background. No one really makes fun of him, he doesn't draw a whole lot of attention to himself (unlike Fred ), but he is goofy. Anyway, every year we have this King of Hearts dance, IDK what the fuck that means but every year a few popular guys get nominated and people vote and someone becomes the King of Hearts at that dance.

This year it was a few generic jock guys and somehow Frank got nominated... I guess it was a joke, and it makes sense really. To nominate people for this thing, student council hands out sheets of paper with all the guys in the senior class on them. You had to circle 8 people or some shit. Most people of course don't really give a shit, so you just circle random names and then you see "Frank Beifus." Of course most people are gonna go holy shit I'm totally nominating this kid lol! So yeah... last year it was another weird kid who we called Patty Benz... lolz

This guy is definitely the kicker. I haven't seen him around lately because I'm pretty sure he was expelled. Anyway, this kid is fucked up. He's half black half white, and in special ed. I'm not sure if he's retarded but there is definitely something wrong with him. Christian has been ridiculed for as long as I can remember... I actually feel kinda bad for him, but whatever. Anyway, I remember back in 7th grade gym class, my friend Alex started making "Christian jokes" which were actually just modified racist jokes directed at Christian. I seriously wish I could remember some of them, because they were hilarious at the time. The entire gym class joined in on them too, and this kid was getting pissed off. Most of the jokes related to him being "shit colored" or "chocolate," mostly juvenile stuff.

After a while Christian got really pissed off and tried to hit Alex on the football field or some shit, and ended up getting suspended. Oh yeah, he was also really smelly. I don't think he used deodorant. He really didn't help the "smelly nigger" stereotype... The dude was actually nice if you talked to him, but he was always a little... off. Earlier this year, I guess before he got expelled, someone did something to really piss him off and he stormed out of the school and made some death threats. Someone told me he said he was gonna "blow X's head off with his sniper rifle," or something lulzy like that. He got the cops called on him and a letter went out to the students during last period. Word got out that the letter was about Christian... people started freaking out thinking there would be a school shooting the next day... lol.