gtfo

That is an ass I would fuck the shit out of

One time someone tried to convince me that TCP stood for Transfer Control Protocol, when it's actually Transmission Control Protocol. Bitch is in a grave now.

>>3278279
was once asked by some lady where she swiped her credit card on her computer if she ever bought something online

My professor, who normally is very versed in language and rhetoric called a browser a server today in class.

That's all I got.

>>3278338
OP here. reminds me, once had a crackhead lady who had never heard of Google before. Asked me what she should set her homepage to instead of AOL, mentioned Google, then had to spend 45 minutes trying to explain to said crackhead, who thought AOL WAS the internet, what Google was

>>3278274

Thats a man baby

>>3278353
Not unusual. Neither is typing a full URL into a search engine like Yahoo to visit a site rather than the address bar.

I work for a company that provides some employees laptops to sue at home.

I get 4-5 calls a week with people having trouble getting them online, which we require that the employee have a high speed connection. Almost 99% of the time it's because people plug the Ethernet cable into our laptop, and then into their home computer.

>>3278356
even better.

>>3278393

Wow, I actually don't know what you're talking about. No wonder they don't know what they're supposed to do, you can't explain it for shit.

>>3278419
Seconded

GENTLEMEN, BEHOLD!

http://www.rinkworks.com/stupid/

>>3278440
* Customer: "Ok, I've turned the computer off, then on again. It still says, 'Safe to power off, or press any key to reboot'?"
* Tech Support: "No, not the monitor switch, the CPU switch."

ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

>>3278392
OH GOD I HAVE A FRIEND LIKE THAT D:

Except he uses Google, but whenever he wants to visit a site he types either the (badly misspelled) name into the search bar or the URL into the search bar (like microsoft.com). Also when he goes to check his Gmail, he opens the browser, performs a search for "Gmail" and clicks the first link. It literally hurts watching him use a computer.

Normally I wouldn't put up with that shit but I'm doing my part to help educate him so he can be less retarded. Currently he's studying for A+ and Network+. It's kind of a personal project of mine.

>>3278476
Also he uses IE7 and doesn't make use of the tab function at all, having multiple windows open simultaneously.

>>3278475
>the CPU switch.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

>>3278475
Case switch.

CPU doesn't have a switch.

>>3278490
nothing wrong with that, only one instance of program code exist at a time

>>3278505
hence the rage

>>3278353
Plenty of people thought AOL was the internet once.

I have a friend who has bad anger issues and when I try to help her with her computer, she says things like "The box popped up and said that thing had an error and now it won't work!!!" then gets steaming mad when I have NO idea what she is talking about and I ask her to explain more thoroughly.

>>3278476
>he opens the browser, performs a search for "Gmail" and clicks the first link

Actually...
Well...
I do that.

>>3278476
most of the time i don't bother typing in an address of a generic site. It's much easier to just click on the google search feature next to the address bar on firefox and type the name of the site i'm looking for. I don't understand why you rage at this. It can often be much quicker if you don't have the site in your history

>>3278521
Stop helping her, she will NEVER EVER EVER even TOUCH you, let alone go out with and/or have sex with you.

>>3278547
1. Type name into address bar (I.E. "google" without the quotes)

2. Hit CTRL+Enter

>>3278559

Well we've been dating for a year, I just didn't want to get spammed with "Lier u dunt have a gf!!!"

>>3278419
>>3278431
What the fuck is there to understand? I'll break it down for you.

1. We provide them a laptop to do remote work on.
2. They need to connect these laptops to the internet to upload their work when done.
3. They apparently know nothing about connecting a computer to a network or internet source, so they just plug the Ethernet cable into their home computer and expect it to work and have internet access.

That's the exact same thing I said in my earlier post, fags. Not that hard to understand, unless you're one of these people that call me.

>>3278571
Lier u dunt have a gf!!!

>>3278571

You sir are a liar as you don't have a female friend, enjoy your figurines, Dutch wives and Mrs Hand.

>>3278571
I dont think you have a gf

enjoy having popups, alone, in the dark

>>3278393
>>3278579

>tripfagmakeshimselflooksillyThenpretentious.jpg

>>3278601
>newfaglearnshowtoquoteshitandattemptsatrollLOLOLOLOLO

I'm tempted to go and ask my geek squad how much 3lb's of internet costs now.

>>3278539
type
mail.google.com
or
gmail.com
both work wonders.

>>3278609

u got TRLD bro

>>3278539
im feeling lucky anyone?

>>3278615
Trolls trollin' trolls?

>>3278615
lolitrollu

I have a friend that tried to burn 4 dvds at once, because he was burning at "4x" speed, ended up jamming his drive with discs.

>>3278609
stop tripfagging
the reason your first post was inane was because you described the user plugging the connection into their laptop and then connecting that to their home computer. You misspoke. If you were Anon you wouldn't get shit about it but instead you have to cock up a thread defending your tripfag name that nobody but you actually cares about.

just
stop

HOw's the pay, OP?

So many times:
Me: "what OS do you have?"
Faggot: "Office 97"[or 2003 or 2007, its happened more than once.]

>>3278601
>>3278419
>>3278393

No, honestly, you're fucking retarded. Go back to building ricer rigs without understanding shit.

how much per hour OP?

>>3278643
This is half the problem with tripfags

With forced anonymous, you take no credit for your posts, so when someone says something stupid and gets called on it, they disappear. With tripfags they just faggot up thread after thread after thread defending their "good name"

>>3278539
>>3278612
Or, even easier, you can, you know, click the link that says "Gmail" when you are at Google. Couldn't be easier, you don't even need to lift your hand from the mouse.

this one time i heard geeksquad charge a lady 250buck to do a system restore on her 220 dollar laptop (bf) and she handed it over to them.

>>3278676

tripfagdropstripthenabusedanonymousandaccidentlyquoteshimself.png

>>3278700
niggers.gif.mkv

>>3278700
You do not seem to understand the "x.jpg" system.

>>3278719

butthurt polytripfag

>>3278699
Goddamn.
That gives me some ideas.

HOW MCUH U GET PAID, SON?

>>3278688
or I could type an 'm' in the Awesome bar and click mail.google.com

>>3278840
Not if you don't save your history

>>3278848
thats your prerogative

>>3278539
then you are a lazy fucker.

This happened today while I was at work.

A workmate told me that he's saving up for a computer and asked me if £300 should be enough. I asked him if he was going to buy a prebuilt or if he's going to build one himself.

He said he was gonna get a prebuilt one because it'd be better (performance-wise) since it was built by professionals.

I quickly changed the subject to contain my rage.

>>3278926
;_;

>>3278252

Stupid people piss the fuck out of me. I can't even BEGIN to fucking comprehend how people can't figure out SIMPLE THINGS on their computer, like copying pictures from a camera or downloading a program.

My friend always ask me stupid fucking questions about easy daily operations that fucking are SO EASY. I wish the world was a little more educated.

/rant

>>3278699

This is why I want to work for Geek Squad.

Former Circuit City fag, store got bought out by Fry's and I was allowed to become a "Supervisor" of my old department (Tech and Video Games) with slightly higher pay.

I've gotten rage inducing things all the time, but something that happened recently is that this guy asked me if he could play 360 games on his PS3 if he bought a 360 HDDVD Drive (We have a few in the used electronics section for like $10

>>3279089
I trust you said yes

My main computer has dual 19" LCDs. Whenever people come over they ask me why I have 2 computers.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFfffffffffffffffffffffff

>>3278641
haha

Somewhat related to topic
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28679588/
>Once it's on a cell phone, that cell phone can be put on the Internet
>You don't realize what you are doing until it's already done

>>3278274
even if that person is ben who does the cashier?

>>3278392
avoids having the site in the url list. browser history, yes, url list no.

(rendered obsolete by ff3, but still)

my favorite was my sister insisting the monitor was the computer, and the mid-size tower was just the modem. called her an idiot and walked away.

One that jumps out at me the most is an old friend of mine called installing "downloading". I tried correcting him a few times, but gave up. Good guy, but freaking stupid.

I don't even bother getting into computer discussion with most people. they're too stupid to know what they're talking about.

>>3278688
type "g" in your address bar
hit enter
shit bricks

We had a CAD guy at my last IT job who was one test away from MCSE cert. He called us one day asking for a new surge strip. I took one to his cubie and since he wasn't there I just left it. We get a call from him about an hour later asking why we left him a European surge strip. Sooooo, finding this rather amusing considering we had no European surge strips me and the other IT guy took a walk to see him. Wait for it.....

Turns out it was one of the surge strips with the plug rotated about 25 degrees so it goes in at an angle rather than straight on...

If you don't get it GTFO /g/

Two stories:

I work for a hosting company and had a customer ask if they got a CPU upgrade if that would make their DNS changes propagate faster.

Recently, I lost my cable because I Comcast disconnected the wrong fucking apartment. I call up, tell the rep from Comcast what is exactly wrong: I"m not getting any connection what so ever. She kept muttering that there was something wrong with my IP address. I was so pissed off. Next time I'm getting escalated to a level 2 tech as soon as I'm on the phone.

>>3279295
Holy crap

>>3279295
MIND = BLOWN

>>>3278643
>the reason your first post was inane was because you described the user plugging the connection into their laptop and then connecting that to their home computer

You have it half right there, junior. Lets see if we can't read my original post once again.

>Almost 99% of the time it's because people plug the Ethernet cable into our laptop, and then into their home computer.

Okay, so we have an Ethernet cable plugged into the laptop which is then plugged into their home computer as the post reads. Where the fuck did I put that they connect their internet source to the laptop and then to their home computer.

Keep being an internet tough guy, anon. While you're at it please learn to read.

>>3279295
FFFFFFFFFFFFF-

You sir are my new hero.

>>3279295
www.g.com?

Does no one on this thread use these? I love them!
Also in FF3 if you click links with the middle mouse button then it opens them in a new tab! I use this SO much.

now try 'tpb'
Proof firefox users are pirates

>>3279700
I set tpb as a search keyword.

>>3279672
I have /g/ in chromium so I can easily read several threads. I find the top part of the browser too big in firefox, so I don't put shit in bookmark toolbar.

To quote my SMS inbox in detail:

"I NEED A CPU SAME AS YOU JUST FIXED FOR US NOWI NEED FOR THE OTHER COMPUTER MONITOR.F U HAVE XTRA CPU FOR SALE.i CAN BUY it_"

It turns out she was referring to a keyboard.

I recently also fixed my dad's computer. Virus scan found 91 malwares on it. When I asked why they hadn't installed any updates, they said they were out of hard drive space.

8.2 out of 33.4GB used.

In class, 80% failed to install the nVidia drivers in Windows. INCLUDING THE FUCKING TEACHER!

>>3279672
A waste of 20px.

>>3279755
Welcome to America, when your computer takes a shit, the proper protocol is to not look at it and continue working.

>>3279755
often times, IT teachers are oldfags that lived in the days of DOS and had nerd talk about sectors in a floppy disk. They don't know shit about new stuff like graphics cards, CPUs, etc.

>>3279793
The thing is... I live in Europe. The smart part of Europe.
>>3279796
True. But this guy is capable of using his head. He ain't that normal dumb textbook teacher. It's depressing.

On one of my various sojourns around the world, I came across a little internet cafe in Venezuela. It's poor users were having to use __pirated__ copies of Microsoft Windows, so i quickly gave the owner a copy of Ubuntu GNU/Linux. The owner was overjoyed to see that a majority of the users who were originally trying to comprise his system soon left with his installation of Ubuntu. Now, even the government in Venezuela uses GNU/Linux.
--rms

They have a radio contest on whatever crappy station the shuttlebuses to work play called "5 in 10", where you have to name 5 of whatever subject in 10 seconds. The subject one morning was "Internet Service Providers".

Literally everyone who called in during that break said either Yahoo, Google, or both. And people on the shuttle were wondering why they didn't get it.

>>3279773

That's why you set Firefox to look like this.

You know, all of you people love to circlejerk and revel when some person doesn't know every little thing about computers. But how many of you know every single part of your car's engine and can do all repair work that doesn't require special equipment, or know how your heart/lungs/circulatory system work and eat right and exercise (lol fit people on /g/).
Because you know your mechanics and doctors make fun of you behind your back just like in this thread for all of your ignorance.

But hey, continue thinking you're the greatest because you know something that hardly anyone outside your geeky little circle cares about.

>>3280083

I think mine is better.

OP how is the pay I was thinking about joining for fun

IM GAY

How does one go about joining geeksquad, what are the requirements?

>>3280125
I do car repair as well, I'm a Subarufag.

As far as the rest, most people in my life do Healthcare or are Doctors/Shrinks, and I work as IT for a Medical-based company.

>>3280179
You see, you're like me (medfag nerd in a mechanic family). You're set.

But what's everyone else's excuse?

my prof. uses a mac. So by law that makes him a knowledgeless fuck

>>3279401
>>3279484
>>3279558

quicksearch bro's. feels good.

>>3280193
I'm too busy amassing a great deal of knowledge in one field that I don't have time to know about others that don't concern me too much. *
Honestly, I'm fine with people not knowing some basic things, but it's the people who know nothing about most things that they use on a daily basis that shit me, and I mock them accordingly.

*More knowledge --> good job --> more money = good car that doesn't break down and need fixing before you've bought your next one.

My friend and I was talking to a teacher while he was on the computer. The teacher received an email from one of his friends and I don't remember the specific context but he wanted to respond with an .mp3 file of Cartman saying, "Whateva, I do what I want." He then proceeded to type in "whatever.mp3" into Google and expected to find it. I think he went through about 12 pages of websites before he gave up. It was one of the most amazing things I have ever seen.

>>3280133
>lolifox

>>3280255
facepalm
so much...

>>3280166
Two hands.

>>3280255
>My friend and I was

Black man detected. Hold on to your gear while it passes.

I feel the same way

I'm studying them because it is a weakness in our society.

and they are awesome

i went into frys today, and i overheard a customer ask a guy in laptops where pci wireless cards were
he panicked and called for back-up. no joke it took three guys to help this old lady just to find the networking section.

>>3279129
but why?

>>3279295
an internet to you, good sir.

>>3280336
New people are new, instead of sending her to the wrong aisle they are trained to ask for help.

You can know all you want about computers, but that doesn't mean you know where everything is when you walk into an electronics/computer store.

Three guys, most likely because Fry's trains in groups to save money. Similar to any other company out there.

Hell its like expecting a woman to know where the shoes are in every department store.

>>3280255
I remember when google was easy to find mp3s on. Before I started torrenting like a motherfucker, I got several GiB of music of google intitle:index.of mp3

ive got a 1.6ghz dual core why is my laptop slow?

my laptop is dual core why do i only have one hard drive?

i could have smacked this so called friend in the face

YOU ARE TYPING A DOCUMENT
YOU MISSPELL A WORD
DO NOT HIT THE LEFT ARROW KEY UNTIL YOU GET TO THE BEGINNING OF THE WORD AND THEN HIT DELETE
JUST HIT BACKSPACE

FUCK

OP here, sorry guys, had to actually go to work. For all the people who asked earlier:
So far as pay, at lead tech, I get 18.50 an hour, started at 10.50 an hour when they first hired me. Personally I have A+, MCP in XP and Vista, CCNA 1 and 2, and MCSE.

>>3280386

thanks for diluting the value of a CCNA for the rest of us, geekfag

>>3280394
Haha personally I thought CCNA was the easiest cert to get. MCP is a fucking pain in the ass because 75% of it was fucking group policy shit that you will almost never ever use in day to day work unless you were an actual network admin of a sizable system.

>>3280405
Really, I have been putting off signing up for the CCNA, I think it'd be a great first cert but I hate subnetting.

>>3280255
You know, I wouldn't be surprised if that actually worked. From the tone of your post it sounds like this wasn't the case, but it almost seems as if he had seen "whatever.mp3" somewhere else before and was just looking for the site again.

>>3280442
I loved the CCNA courses, it was the first cert I got myself, and I actually use the stuff I learned in it.

CCNA by itself, or CCNA grouped with the CompTIA 'gimmies' (A+, N+) sticks out like a sore thumb on a resume.

ITT: lots of pretentious closet neckbeards who thinks if anyone doesn't use a computer their way, it's wrong.

>>3278393
>>3278475
>>3278490
>>3278476
>>3278562
>>3278579

>>3280386
18.50 an hour...

>>3280543
welcome to /g/

>>3280543
nigger

>>3280543

Don't worry...

I interview people all the time and this kind of attitude bleeds through almost instantly. It pretty much immediately disqualifies someone.

>>3280547
Yeah, 18.50, not bad for beer money job in college. Most people don't realize but you can make some real cash working for Best Buy is you make it a career. Lead Tech for GS is capped at 22.50 but the Services Manager pulls down about 75K a year, the Best Buy Mobile Manager makes about 95K, GM is like 125K plus depending on what kind of bonuses he gets for store performance

got this while trying to convince my mom to use firefox one day:

but if i don't have internet explorer how will i get on the internet?

So how was that Unicru test OP?

I used to to IT work at the Arby's corporate headquarters back when it was located in south Florida.

It was awesome answering any job-related questions at parties with "I work at Arby's" and then not elaborating.

>>3280696

Sorry, that's not a career, it's a job - a well paying one but still just a job.

>>3280125

True, but we know enough about cars to not blame them if we get lost while driving. Many computer users cannot say the same thing.

I fix allot of computers for people, and honestly, you have no idea how common it is for the person to fry there computer by pulling the plug every time because they don't know how to turn it off, and I have had someone who didn't have the fucking thing plugged into the wall and couldn't figure out why it wouldn't turn on.

>>3280741
Haha, I have to say, the Unicru questions for Geek Squad made me laugh. "How many computer systems have you built in the last 6 months? 0, 1-2, 2-3, 3-4, 5 or more"

>>3278476
This is why I sell computers, instead of working at the geek squad.

Fuck man, I can't fucking stand fixing those people's problems. Plus, even if he doesn't know anything more, he'd be about as well trained as the average IT person I deal with every day.

How many of realize that relative to real, seasoned IT people you are just as clueless as the laymen who you're circle-jerking over?

>>3280824
Most "seasoned" IT people I have ever met have gotten to the point they know absolutely everything about almost absolutely nothing. case and point, a network engineer I know who is an expert a system security but has no idea how to fucking work an ipod.

>>3280824
the difference being that the clueless laymen of which you speak have no willingness to learn at all and simply want you to fix their problem and go away so they can make more mac vs pc videos.

why would a real IT person want to know anything about a trendy teenager's MP3 player?

>>3278393
I believe he means they put the ethernet in the laptop, then put it in their home computer, without a router, so the ethernet isn't doing jack, and they can't connect to the internet because their cord is going nowhere

>>3280871
to carry on from my post, a few years back i didnt even know how to connect to a wireless network, when the tech guy came round I sat behind him (in a gay way) and asked him a shit load of questions, he showed me how to do it and a load of other stuff. Now I move into a flat and my roomate simply asked me to 'fix up the wireless while he was out'. I fixed up the wireless, ofcourse, but he can kiss my ass if he thinks he's getting any of it.

>>3279755
To be fair: even if you do manage to install the nVidia drivers, you still fail.

>>3278338
My AP macro teacher who says that hes a nerd and used to program said that his computer had 160gb of Ram last week.
It was hard to not laugh in his fucking face

>>3278252
>How much do you charge per pound for internet?

best thing I've read all day.

Thanks

OP,

Ya know, I'm a pretty arrogant guy but I still managed to maintain my professionalism, courtesy, and politeness while dealing with some really computer illiterate people.

I guess that's the difference between you and me, I'm a man with a job to do and you're a boy doing something on the side so you won't have to take as much money from your mommy and daddy.

I had one woman demand that I make changes to her Outlook that were literally impossible without rewriting the software. She would not understand this fact and to top it off she was a Hispanic government (GSA) employee that barely spoke English. I dealt with it.

I had multiple women whine about "programs" missing or not working. Then, after asking them some more questions, I realize they are simply missing a link to a website. They thought their shortcuts to websites going missing meant that a program was missing.

You deal with it.

I was never "friendly." I don't like people. I didn't strike up a conversation about their kids or the weather or football. I did, however, maintain a professional tone and take care of their problem(s) quickly and efficiently.

I do something more technical now. Something with minimal customer interaction. Being "friendly" (i.e. likable and willing to converse about inane bullshit) is 50% of help desk/desktop support/PC tech work.

My parents don't know how to drag and drop after using Windows for 15 years

My college computer teacher doesn't know how to enter the BIOS

Girl at High school was looking in her folder from excel, it ofc only showed .xls, she practically got up and screamed "ALL OF MY SHIT IS GONE"

Spanish teacher in high school copied 5,000 files to his desktop like 25 times

Left a flash drive in parent's computer, had to go to high school, dad started up comp and was greeted by "non-system diskette, remove and hit any key to continue", didn't know what to do, practically grounded me for a week because "I broke the computer"

Other spanish teacher thought "A/S/L" stood for "American Sign Language"

Bunch of newfags at school who thought they were oldfags because they knew about "A cat is fine too" meme

A "progamer" zerg user I met on b.net - his ZvT strategy was mass queens

Also google "cut nvidia 7800" (remember at the time it was like a $700 card)

>>3278475
That one reminds me of my very first ticket as a professional nerd.

Ticket said, "Office Word toolbars are off center."

After going to her desk and investigating Word thoroughly I concluded that what she really meant was that her monitor display was not centered correctly so I auto-centered it and she was happy.

First ticket, true story.

>>3280972
>A "progamer" zerg user I met on b.net - his ZvT strategy was mass queens

Queens are used now. What the fuck are you talking about?

>A "progamer" zerg user I met on b.net - his ZvT strategy was mass queens

/v/ is that way.

I rage when my tutor fails to be as godlike fast in pro engineer as I am. Although this is probably due to my extensive training and use of it and his hate of it.

fucking cfd fags think cad-artists are worthless. WE MAKE YOUR MODELS!

>>3281015

/v/ only likes Starcraft on Korea Time, fuck them.

>>3278419
>>3278431
lol idiots

>>3281033
Well, /g/ doesn't like it at all.

>>3281040

fag

>>3279796
GTFO new fag.

DOS was easy to work with and there is still something command line based around called unix that people get paid mad money to even know jack shit about.

Good luck finding a job when all you can do is surf the web and use photoshop faggot.

>>3278252
Oh god I have some good ones, but my brain has blanked most out as a safety measure.

>>3281069
>calling somebody a newfag
>spelling newfag new fag
>new fag

FAIL.

>>3278688
or you can just type gmail.com you fucking retards

>>3280133
Mine is. Screen space on a AA1 fuck year!

While I don't have any one question in particular, I did hold a tech job over the summer. One of the women who worked in the office said that her "CPU got a virus" so she threw it away. By it I mean the whole computer. Mouse, keyboard, monitor and tower all went into the garbage.

The saddest thing?

It was a brand new Dell that she paid $1100 for.

>>3281102
Shit forgot my Pic

>>3281107
I should clarify. Not sad that she bought a Dell, but sad that it was a brand new computer. I imagine that she probably had a 20" monitor and at least a dual core, 4gb, 500gb machine.

I had a "friend" who screwed the motherboard directly onto the case metal without those things that lift it up (I forget the name because I am not a carpenter).

This isn't what pissed me off, though. I can forgive an honest mistake, but what shat me is that he had 3 of the needed 9 screws screwed in. Fuck.

>>3280972
What always separated the truly good SC players from trash players was the use of the units with special abilities.

Personally, I primarily used queens against terrans with tanks.

>>3281131
ZERG RUSH

>>3281131

You aren't understanding me.
His "strategy" was mass queens.
AND ONLY MASS QUEENS.

Also, youtube "julyzerg" or savi0r and see how many times you see a queen in a ZvR game.

>>3281120
waitwat could you explain this part to me? I'm a newfag and I don't know what you're talking about and now I'm afraid my machine is going to explode.

I went over to my fiancee's mother's house to help her mother out with their freshly bought computer. They said they needed an antivirus program, because after a few weeks of owning the computer a friend accidentally spammed them a trojan, that fortunately didn't. So I sat down and opened up IE, and typed AVG in the search bar. Couldn't connect.

So, I figured out the router was unplugged. Both the ethernet and the power cables. The router was behind the the desk, so I went around and crouched down and started tracing the cables back to their sources. My fiancee's mother came in.

Her: "What are you doing?"
Me: "Plugging your network cables back in. Why were they unplugged?"
"Oh that thing. I was trying to save a little on the electricity bill. Is that important?"
"Yeah, it allows you to connect to the internet."
"What you can't use it right now?"
"Nope."
"Why didn't you just use that little 'e'?"
"What? Wait, what?"
"That little blue 'e' down at the bottom of the screen. It lets you get on the internet."

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

>>3281173

mobo tray / case -> riser -> mobo -> screw

if your shit is not layered in that order, enjoy your fail

>>3281173
New MoBos come with small pads to elevate them during the shipping process. If all of them are not removed, serious damage could result over about a 3 or 4 month period. The computer will continue to function but in a reduced capacity. It is always the first thing I check for after completing a build but before powering on. You should power off right now and check if you have removed them. Seriously, it is really bad for the MoBo and processor.

1. Customer- "How much is this computer?" *points at monitor*

2. "My computer's been going really slow, I think my CPU is full."

3. "If I buy this wireless router, will this give me that wireless internet so I can take my laptop with me in my car?"

>>3281166

I was kidding. I know that Queens/Cracklings are a new strategy vs M&M. I'm not the guy you're responding to though, I posted Bisu.

>>3281197
>AVG

Enjoy giving her a really shitty free antivirus.

>>3281250
I don't like AVG either, but it's really easy to use for someone that /obviously/ isn't very computer literate.

Guy- How can I get my computer to work faster?
Me- You need to prime your load caches and upgrade your buffer capacity. This should boost your desktop wallpaper.
Guy- Great, thanks!

>>3281268
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahaha

I don't mind so much that not everybody is a /g/uru when it comes to this stuff, there are plenty of non-tech subjects that I'm pretty ignorant about. What really bugs me though is that a lot of people don't even seem to try when it comes to computer stuff. It seems like as soon as most people sit down in front of a computer, any common sense or problem solving skills they may have had just vanish. Maybe it's intimidation, maybe laziness, I dunno. But it bugs me. If I need to figure out how to do something (be it tech related or not), I get on the internet and educate myself on it. Some basic computer skills aren't hard to learn if people actually bothered trying.

>>3281220
how does it damage mobo?

>>3281232
>1. Customer- "How much is this computer?" *points at monitor*
Customer- "How much is this car? *points at engine*

>2. "My computer's been going really slow, I think my CPU is full."
"My car's been going really slow, I think my fuel tank empty."

>3. "If I buy this wireless router, will this give me that wireless internet so I can take my laptop with me in my car?"
"If my car has this cruise control, will it control my speed for me so I don't have to use the accelerator?"

Even when people say we don't know shit about cars and car hobbyists laugh at us for not knowing shit about them, it doesn't even compare to the sort of stupidity of people when it comes to computers. I daresay it's not a matter of "no knowing how computers work," rather, not knowing the world works alltogether. This shit is obvious to 5 year olds. They should grow a brain.

>>3281238
>Queens/Cracklings
A lair level unit who can't cast ensare but once every two minutes paired with a 35 HP cannon fodder which all get chewed up before they can even get halfway to the mnm

How the fuck would you even survive long enough to hive tech with queen and speedling?

0/10 troll

>>3279672
I just use the Morning Coffee addon for Firefox.

I click it and it opens my E-mail, 4chan /g/ and /r9k/, facebook (sorry), google, and a couple other music download blogs.

opens them all with one click, if i dont want the tab to come up (which is rare.) i'll just close it.

Shit's neat.

The only people I ever see who ask me those sort of questions are either 60+ years old, trailer trash, or women.

Even the Amish patrons we sometimes get at my store know the differences between a computer and a monitor.

>>3281309
why not just put those sites in a folder and click open all in tabs?

>>3281309
Thanks for the recommendation, trying it out now.

When I was studying programming, one of my classmates was having serious troubles with his program. When he asked me for help, I leaned over his screen and saw all of his code in comments. The reason: "Well, it compiles much faster that way."

>>3281288
More realistic scenarios would be:

>1. Customer- "How much is this computer?" *points at monitor*

Customer: (Pointing at an Elephant.) "How much is that car?"

>2. "My computer's been going really slow, I think my CPU is full."

"My car has been going really slow, I think it is constipated."

>3. "If I buy this wireless router, will this give me that wireless internet so I can take my laptop with me in my car?"

"Will I be able to teleport, if I buy a car with cruise-control?"

I was just teaching an optional class on C programming; in the first class meeting, I asked, "Does anybody know anything about programming?"

To which one of my students gleefully replied, "I know how to use a chat program!"

The worst I've encountered:

I used to do repair/builds for a living but now I just freelance rather then put up with people like this.

A friend who still does repair work called me & asked if I wanted to stop by a lady's house on the way home from work for 3x what I normally ask just to walk in the door. Supposedly she was hysterical during the call & was still when I got there.

The computer tower is sitting sideways on the desk, which according to her was normally how she had it since it was an older case w/o front USB headers. She was crying and pointing at the tower, buut all I could see was a USB thumbdrive that looked like it had seen better days & a powered off computer.

I take a closer look & the USB connector of the drive looked mangled. I look at the USB ports on the motherboard & one set of two just wasn't there, with the thin divider of the backplate mangled as well.

She had tried to insert the USB key sideways, and in doing so had ripped the ports from the motherboard, cracking the board & causing a short that fried every single component. Because of her, we now have Murphy's Law of keyed connectors:

If there is a correct way to insert a keyed device into its connector and a incorrect way that is blocked by the keying, sooner or later someone will try to insert the device sideways in order to defeat the keying.

>>3281283
It bends the electrons away from the motherboard. This is to protect it from static while in transit. You definitely don't want this to happen while USING the motherboard (since you want the electrons to flow to the components properly). It'll damage it with voltage fluctuations (which is one reason why you need a good power supply as well).

>>3278252
>I work

Don't worry OP, you already kicked 99.9% of /g/'s ass

>>3281107