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HELP 05/09/11(Mon)19:27:42 No.327672272

Hey guise, I have a problem. I think my friends new girlfriend is a succubus. How can I tell for sure? The thing is, she isn't attractive. We've both pretty much been players our whole life and our motto has always been bros before hoes. One night we're at the club and we both leave with random skanks. The next night I call him asking what club we're going out to, and he says he's going to a movie with the skank from last night. It's pretty fucked up since we both usually pull anywhere from 6's to 8's depending on how drunk we are. This girl is a total 4, ugly as sin. The reason I think she is a succubus is because for the past few weeks, he's went from being a total player to a shell of his former self. One night I'm at a bar with some buddies, having some drinks with some friends. My buddy asked where Thomas was. I said he's out with that slut he met a couple of weeks ago. My friends then started saying how much he has changed since he met her.

1/2

Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:28:54 No.327672606

Then my friend said that more than likely the girl he was with was probably a succubus sent from hell to suck the life from him. Thats when I snapped, that one night he met her there was all these fine hoes he could of pulled. But for some reason he picked her. Then I remember he told me to never let him leave the club unless the girl was at least a five. But this girl is so ugly, I told him she was a 4 and to remember our rule. He said he doesn't care, because he said he felt like he was hypnotized by her. I then realize that this beast was singing kareoke before they started talking. I think she sang him the succubus song and put a spell on him in order to drain the life from him slowly but surely. I told a few of my buds and a few of them call me crazy while a few agree with me 100%. I have come to the fact that more than like she is a succubus and I have to break the spell she put on him or I have to kill her. I'm not really ready to go to jail for murder, but I'm realizing I have to do something before its too late.

TL/DR: My friend might be dating a succubus, how can I tell?
Also, if she is one, how do I kill her?

2/2

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:31:37 No.327673384 When she's not looking, throw some holy water in her face. If her face starts to melt, she's a succubus.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:32:46 No.327673682 Light her on fire. If she starts to burn, she's a succubus.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:34:20 No.327674119 > Kill your friend > Fuck the succubus > ???? > Profit!!

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:35:40 No.327674486 Op, you are an idiot. Quit watching South Park and get off of /b/...

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:39:30 No.327675361 She have any friends op? I always wanted to fuck a succubus.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:51:10 No.327675705 Blast it with piss.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:52:16 No.327675823 >>327674486 This.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:52:43 No.327675879 The only way to get rid of her is remember what song she was singing and sing it backwards...

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:54:04 No.327676091 >>327672272 >>327672606 >>327673384 >>327673682 >>327674119 >>327674486 >>327675361 >>327675705 >>327675823 Samefag.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:55:38 No.327676314 >>327675879 I was wasted and can't remember the song

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:56:33 No.327676444 >>327676314 Best thing you can do is get wasted again at the same place and try to remember.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)19:58:57 No.327676857 Just ask her if she is a succubus. If she say's no, she's lying. Then call the police and tell them you are a candy-ass.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:01:18 No.327677264 Succubi are supposed to be abnormally attractive, and attract every man, so she isn't a succubus. Which means she's a witch and put a spell on him, burn her.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:01:45 No.327677362 >>327676444 How would I go about singing the song backwards though? Wouldn't she suspect something was up? She's a pretty scary girl.

Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:01:56 No.327677393

There's got to be a morning after
If we can hold on through the night
We have a chance to find the sunshine
Let's keep on looking for the light

Oh, can't you see the morning after?
It's waiting right outside the storm
Why don't we cross the bridge together
And find a place that's safe and warm?

It's not too late, we should be giving
Only with love can we climb
It's not too late, not while we're living
Let's put our hands out in time

There's got to be a morning after
( From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/m/maureen-mcGovern-lyrics/the-morning-after-lyrics.html )
We're moving closer to the shore
I know we'll be there by tomorrow
And we'll escape the darkness
We won't be searching anymore

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:02:43 No.327677537 >>327677362 You gotta do this man. Scary or not, it's for your bro. I think roofies + tying her down and waiting for her to wake up before singing it would do best.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:03:55 No.327677739 >>327677393 this is the succubus song

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:05:38 No.327678021 >>327677739 each succubus has their own song dumbshit

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:05:39 No.327678024 >>327677264 This man knows his shit. Op, drive a wooden stake thru her heart. Make sure its on fire though before you stab her with it.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:06:16 No.327678112 >walked in the door >got on the floor >everynewt gingrich do the dinosaur

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:07:21 No.327678289 Pitchforks?

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:07:35 No.327678338 >>327678112 Um! Wthat the fuck!? Is missingno censoring us? Everybody every body errybody..

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:09:11 No.327678619 It was 80's night and they were playing old songs. Also, my friend has started to look really pale lately. Which is weird, because he always naturally tan.

>>	TradtionalDraconian !!oOBd7ADelbg 05/09/11(Mon)20:11:37 No.327679009 >>327678619 i think you are better off asking /x/ instead of /b/. or she could just be poisoning him.

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:11:56 No.327679059 Faggot Moot Penis Vagina Dick face gremlin Cock mongler

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:14:18 No.327679479 >>327679009 But how would poison keep him attracted to her?

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:15:40 No.327679684 dick balls cock shit tits ass bitch cunt candy-ass fag roody-poo jew lady gaga missingno christopher pool newt gingrich sup /b/

>>	Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:17:21 No.327679974 I rofl'd Imagine if you actually thought your mate's bird was a fucking "succubus"

Anonymous 05/09/11(Mon)20:18:23 No.327680164

dick balls cock shit tits ass bitch cunt candy-ass fag roody-poo jew lady gaga missingno christopher pool newt gingrich sup /b/
dick balls cock shit tits ass bitch cunt candy-ass fag roody-poo jew lady gaga missingno christopher pool newt gingrich sup /b/
dick balls cock shit tits ass bitch cunt candy-ass fag roody-poo jew lady gaga missingno christopher pool newt gingrich sup /b/
dick balls cock shit tits ass bitch cunt candy-ass fag roody-poo jew lady gaga missingno christopher pool newt gingrich sup /b/
dick balls cock shit tits ass bitch cunt candy-ass fag roody-poo jew lady gaga missingno christopher pool newt gingrich sup /b/

>>	TradtionalDraconian !!oOBd7ADelbg 05/09/11(Mon)20:19:54 No.327680436 >>327679479 well i think that is what ecstasy is for.

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