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  • File : 1314761474.jpg-(31 KB, 330x472, rodney-dangerfield.jpg)
    31 KB Rodney Dangerfield !!9zuxDxS8sln 08/30/11(Tue)23:31 No.4911236  
    Oh man /cgl/ I gotta tell you I'm in real rough shape. This whole cosplay thing is running me ragged and I don't know how you all do it. My wife notices this and tells me the next time we go to a con to take it easy and do some closet cosplay. The next day I wake up seeing a bunch of clothes hangers and I'm locked in with my wife's bad Sunday dresses.

    But this cosplay thing is way too confusing for me. I asked /cgl/ for help and they said I can always take a commission. I thought that was a page from the Karma Sutra.

    I don't even know why I bother with cons, I don't like them too much. In fact I met my wife at a con.I took her picture, she almost took me to the cleaners after our first divorce.

    Really though my wife is really something. Just the other day I saw her bent over backwards in the bedroom doing Jojo poses. I thought she did an ok job but the three Dio cosplayers under the covers begged to differ.

    That's the thing /cgl/ I get no respect no respect at all! I should have known my wife was losing interest in me the night we watched the second Evangelion Rebuild movie together. I was feeling romantic and told her she's not alone. When I went to put the moves on her she tells me I can't advanced.

    I don't even know why I bother staying with her, for one she's a horrible at making dinner. I looked in the kitchen one night as saw her using the Death Note as a cooking book. In fact my wife's meatloaf is the only thing in this world that Kamnia's drill can't pierce.

    Rough shape /cgl/ real rough shape.
    >> Anonymous 08/30/11(Tue)23:38 No.4911279
    >>4911236
    GOD DAMNIT I READ IT IN HIS VOICE!
    >> Anonymous 08/30/11(Tue)23:42 No.4911294
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    Is this your wife, Rodney?
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)01:08 No.4911549
    This shit is hilarious. MORE!
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)05:06 No.4912127
    I fucking bumping this shit because it made me laugh so hard I fucking farted assburgers.
    No seriously and I read it in his voice
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)05:11 No.4912132
         File1314781894.png-(15 KB, 400x400, 1304800591908.png)
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    Would read again.
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)07:01 No.4912236
    >>4911279

    We all did anon, we all did
    >> Rodney Dangerfield !!9zuxDxS8sln 08/31/11(Wed)10:40 No.4912433
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    But that's the problem no respect, I get no respect around here.

    You guys aren't helping with this either. One time someone from /cgl/ offered to help me cosplay Mr. Poppo from Dragonball Z. He later shows up to my house wearing boxing gloves.

    Even the so called "nice people" in this hobby give me a hard time. Just the other day someone tells me to get bent. I turn around and see Jesus giving me the middle finger.

    Really /cgl/ I gotta stop asking you for advice. One time I asked this board if they can pirate a copy of JAWS for me as I wanted to feel scared. Later that day someone links me to a Pixiteri porno.

    Even my doctor gives me no respect, can you believe that? One time I ask him "Hey doc, what's a great way for me to start getting in shape to do Fullmetal Alchamist cosplay?" The guy almost took a hacksaw to my arm!

    But man am I ugly. I'm so ugly that I need to wear a mask to every con I go to or else I'll be beaten to death by Monster Hunter cosplayers. In fact, I'm so ugly that I'm the person Fanime sends out in order to get rid of the religious protesters.
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)18:38 No.4913720
    You win. Best Rodney I've heard...in...wow, since never.
    >> Harley !!Ocs2iA9hfoy 08/31/11(Wed)18:42 No.4913733
         File1314830560.jpg-(56 KB, 640x609, roflstalin-mao-stalin-rofl-lol(...).jpg)
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    >>4912433
    >In fact, I'm so ugly that I'm the person Fanime sends out in order to get rid of the religious protesters.
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)18:48 No.4913745
    >>4912433
    >>4911236

    A+++, would LOL again.
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)22:33 No.4914685
    lol thats some fucking funny shit right there.
    >> Rodney Dangerfield !!9zuxDxS8sln 08/31/11(Wed)22:52 No.4914765
         File1314845577.jpg-(52 KB, 512x384, dvd-stand-up-comedians.jpg)
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    You know, I really should stop asking my wife for suggestions. I remember one time she told me I should cosplay as Kamina from Gurren Lagann. I ask is is because I'm so heroic and insperation? She says no it's cause I'm only around for six episodes.

    Then again it's not like I do any better. I once told my wife I want to go as Big Daddy for the next con. She takes one good at my pants and says I'm more of a little slugger.

    Who am I kidding, I don't have a face fit for this stuff. The only time I was complimented at a con was when a guy complimented how good my troll face was.

    But hey, at least my ugly mug has some uses. Whenever conventions want guys to stop masturbating in the Hentai room they just photoshop my face on all the girls.
    >> Mell !!gw4/lKtnI20 08/31/11(Wed)22:55 No.4914782
         File1314845730.jpg-(43 KB, 640x480, 1273535687838.jpg)
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    >I was feeling romantic and told her she's not alone.
    >When I went to put the moves on her she tells me I can't advanced.
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)23:06 No.4914845
    Never thought I'd see cosplay and Rodney Dangerfield mix. This is some quality stuff!
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)23:30 No.4914964
    MORE!
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)23:50 No.4915060
    We need a guy who can do a good Rodney impression to read these things.
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)23:54 No.4915076
    >>4914765
    you are amazing OP and i love you forever.
    >> Anonymous 08/31/11(Wed)23:57 No.4915086
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    Holy shit my sides. Looks like carry has some competition.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)00:08 No.4915128
    >>4915086
    Carry is a troll. Rodney is actually likable and in character.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)00:14 No.4915148
    >>4915128
    True. Carry's still pretty funny a lot of the time though. I don't really see him around as much anymore though.
    >> Smoker !VUmDTeLJOM 09/01/11(Thu)00:15 No.4915157
    >>4915128
    Carry is a mans man in a mans world baby. And if you don't like it you can go back the the kitchen.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)00:18 No.4915171
    >>4915128
    Is he really a troll though? I've never really seen him make a post that I fully disagree with.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)00:19 No.4915181
    This thread. This fucking thread. Everyone get your asses to chanarchive.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)00:23 No.4915192
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    >>4915171
    >>4915157
    >>4915148
    >>4915128
    >>4915086

    saging because this is turning into a carry thread without him even fucking being here this time. fuck it's like you guys worship him or something
    >> Smoker !VUmDTeLJOM 09/01/11(Thu)00:29 No.4915215
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    >>4915192
    Carry is a swell guy, don't talk trash about em' like that yah hear!
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)00:30 No.4915222
    >>4915215
    Smoker, do you know carry in real life? I'm curious what he looks like.
    >> Smoker !VUmDTeLJOM 09/01/11(Thu)00:32 No.4915226
         File1314851547.jpg-(136 KB, 433x550, jimmy-stewart-by-Dead-Beat-Nic(...).jpg)
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    >>4915222
    Pffft, no, I just like carry grant and Jimmy Stuart movies.
    >> TK-421 09/01/11(Thu)01:07 No.4915330
    I'm curious how Groucho Marx would be.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)01:26 No.4915372
    >>4915330
    Groucho would be really hard to do as a lot of his finest moments are back and forth with other people.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)01:49 No.4915416
    >>4915226
    then why can't you spell cary grant right?
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)06:17 No.4915874
    lol'd like a bitch
    >> Rodney Dangerfield !!9zuxDxS8sln 09/01/11(Thu)11:18 No.4916360
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    I'm ok now but the last con I went to left me in real rough shape. I got a ton of pictures taken with a Haruka from FLCL too bad they all involved me being beaten by her guitar.

    But really I don't know how you guys afford these events. Then again I'm just so poor.

    >How poor?

    I'm so poor, I can't even afford the down payment on a free hug.

    See I never get a free handout. The only thing a con gave something to me with no charge was a police escort when I wandered into the K-On gathering.

    However as bad as I got it at least I'm not dumb like my wife. My wife is so dumb I tell her she should cosplay as someone from Touhou, later that day she goes around the con licking the feet of random men.

    Oh man my wife is so dumb she thought the needles that came with her sewing kit were for acupuncture.
    >> h.n.elly !!P2ojEMMesl4 09/01/11(Thu)11:35 No.4916383
         File1314891325.gif-(10 KB, 616x505, 1307815845307.gif)
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    I wish I knew what to call this 4chan guy who does these comedian impersonations.

    He's pretty rad.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)13:00 No.4916616
    >>4915416
    Their talking about carry the trip, who always spells it with two r's to piss people off
    >> Eos !!sviwWkgOtS5 09/01/11(Thu)13:05 No.4916626
    >>4915330

    YES. That makes two of us. *needs to watch more Marx Brothers stuff*
    >> Fluttershy !ptEoNJbXvo 09/01/11(Thu)15:14 No.4916900
    >>4915330
    I'd much rather see them attempt Harpo!
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)15:16 No.4916903
         File1314904568.jpg-(47 KB, 500x544, 2dab54b5-cc7a-43b1-8061-33d3f1(...).jpg)
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    I love you OP for this!
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)16:00 No.4917039
    >>4916616
    but smoker was referencing the actor because s/he mentioned liking their films.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)16:16 No.4917091
    >>4916383
    You think it's the same guy?
    >> h.n.elly !!P2ojEMMesl4 09/01/11(Thu)16:17 No.4917095
    >>4917091
    I don't know for sure, but he said he did them for practice, and the style of writing/type of jokes is like his was.

    If not, could have had me fooled, still funny.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)21:36 No.4918071
    bumping for Rodney!
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)22:09 No.4918190
    this thread gets no respect
    >> Rodney Dangerfield !!9zuxDxS8sln 09/01/11(Thu)23:03 No.4918410
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    This whole cosplay thing is driving me crazy. Last con I was in I decided to go as the world's biggest loser. I take one look at the game room and see everyone's wearing the same costume as me.

    Oh boy, video games that's something that always gives me a headache. My sex life is like Marvel vs Capcom 3, simple, repetitive and broken.

    I'm doing everything I can in order to be well liked around here. Some anon told me he'd help me be a better tripfag, he did so by pushing me down a flight of stairs.

    And don't get me started on my wife. You mention the world circlejerk and she opens her mouth on reflex.

    I wish I was popular like that one guy Johnny Bravo. The only time people say bravo after my name is when I head toward the exit.

    But cons, cons are a scary place to be in. Fell for a trap at the first con I ever visited. I'm still pulling the thorns out of my butt ever since.
    >> Anonymous 09/01/11(Thu)23:51 No.4918590
    Is it just me or are there a good chunk of witty threads on cgl as of lately?
    >> Anonymous 09/02/11(Fri)01:19 No.4918885
    threads like this make me think there are good tripfags in this world
    >> Kiwi !Hc6EcVkstI 09/02/11(Fri)01:23 No.4918893
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    >>4918410
    >Some anon told me he'd help me be a better tripfag, he did so by pushing me down a flight of stairs.
    >> TK-421 09/02/11(Fri)02:15 No.4919040
    Rodney, your are my new /cgl/ hero.
    >> Anonymous 09/02/11(Fri)02:29 No.4919074
    This. This is a good thread.
    >> Groucho Marx !!9zuxDxS8sln 09/02/11(Fri)10:43 No.4919986
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    >>4915330
    >>4915372
    >>4916626
    I'd hate to admit it but I actually have a paid subscription with Cosplay Deviants.
    >Why the heck would you PAY for those pictures.
    I believe in giving to the less fortunate.

    >Are the models that poor

    Not the models, I'm talking about me.

    >What on Earth can Cosplay Deviants give you?

    A reason to keep my clothes on.

    >So what do you think /cgl/ stands for?

    I don't think /cgl/ stands for anything. Everybody over there trips. Another thing I don't get is why using a tripcode. I know on the internet we like to keep our data private but I think having a password for when we fall down is a bit much. All I do is put my arms out.

    >What do you think of the tripfags there?

    A stranger lot that the people at cosplay deviants. Least those people take off their clothes after they get paid. Take that Blue fellow. What a strange name, Blue. That's a real cheery name to take to a party. "Hi I'm Blue" The kid would be hit with so many antidepressant jokes that he'd think Prozac funded every social event he'd attend. Then again he could be talking about THE Blues in which case then he's really black. In that case he'd better start bringing his entire jazz band over cause his solo career is kinda lacking.

    But in all honesty I like this place, those folks actually have the guts and drive to cosplay. I'd schedule a private photoshoot myself but I would be distracted thinking how the guy is able to hold his camera near the crotch of his pants all the time.
    >> Eos !!sviwWkgOtS5 09/02/11(Fri)10:58 No.4920017
    >>4919986

    This is...this is just brilliant. I'm laughing so hard right now.
    >> h.n.elly !!P2ojEMMesl4 09/02/11(Fri)11:03 No.4920031
         File1314975799.gif-(251 KB, 230x360, tumblr_ln5fng1MPk1qa9m32.gif)
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    >>4919986
    >> TL;DR 09/02/11(Fri)12:26 No.4920255
    >>4919986
    I do not have a reaction image to properly express how much I enjoyed this... but I enjoyed it a lot.
    >> Anonymous 09/02/11(Fri)14:24 No.4920614
    more please
    >> Comedy OP !!9zuxDxS8sln 09/02/11(Fri)17:05 No.4921136
    >>4920614
    Dangerfield or Marx?
    >> Eos !!sviwWkgOtS5 09/02/11(Fri)17:13 No.4921149
    >>4921136

    Yes. :-P
    >> Anonymous 09/02/11(Fri)21:41 No.4921957
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    OP you made my day
    >> Groucho Marx !!9zuxDxS8sln 09/02/11(Fri)21:42 No.4921958
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    >>4921149
    >>4920614
    A good portion of /cgl/ are leaving to go to Dragoncon, listen here folks you ever seen a dragon in real life? It's hard enough to take one out with a sword and you folks think you got what it takes to outsmart one? Dragons don't really need much wit to get around in life cause they can breath fire. I really think that breathing fire is one of the end all counter arguments you can ever use the debate.

    I'm sorry Mr. Chairman but I think the dragon who nearly gave me third degree burns has a more compelling argument here.

    I'm surprised there aren't that many dragons walking around in the cosplay world. I see so many flames being shot out that I feel like I'm living in the fire nation. You'd think it would be common place to carry around a bucket of water when you cosplay but you gotta keep in mind that most otaku melt at the very touch of it hence why they're so stinky.
    >> Anonymous 09/02/11(Fri)21:55 No.4922003
    >>4921958
    >You'd think it would be common place to carry around a bucket of water when you cosplay but you gotta keep in mind that most otaku melt at the very touch of it hence why they're so stinky.
    Oh god, my sides.
    >> Anonymous 09/02/11(Fri)22:06 No.4922030
    threads like this deserve to be on the front page
    >> Anonymous 09/02/11(Fri)23:18 No.4922312
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3DghuWzjbo

    Rodney lives on in this man
    >> Anonymous 09/03/11(Sat)03:56 No.4923169
    What happen to the first Cosplay Comedian thread?
    >> SandSnake !!YohEWW1qGo/ 09/03/11(Sat)05:07 No.4923274
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    Holy fuck this is awesome. Best thread I've seen in AGES.
    >> Anonymous 09/03/11(Sat)09:32 No.4923525
    >>4923274
    Sooo are we gonna try to archive this?
    >> Rodney Dangerfield !!9zuxDxS8sln 09/03/11(Sat)11:49 No.4923825
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    (warning some of these jokes are reposed from previous threads)

    Let's face the music /cgl/ I got no sex life at all. My wife gets the idea to spice things up and has me practice my fingering, later that night she hands me a joystick and a bunch of fighting games.

    You know that's the last stuff I want to play right now as I live it. My sex life is just like Marvel vs Capcom 3, simple, repetitive and broken beyond belief.

    It seems everyone else in the world is having sex with my wife but me. It's gotten the the point where my face will be kissed is when it's the spy's lips on the other side.

    I wish I could enjoy Team Fortress 2 as much as everyone else. I told the Meidc one day to charge me, later on I see him using my Visa to buy a new car.

    But hey it's not like I caught myself a decent woman. My wife isn't too smart of a person. One time I saw her buying tickets to the zoo on account she wanted to see some Tiger and Bunny cosplay.

    I wanted to go get some girls to look my way so I wore a tuxedo from Black Butler. Hotel Staff had me on valet duty the entire convention.

    That's the story of my life, no respect! I get no respect coming my way!

    I knew the guy who ran Anime Expo and I asked him if there's any way I can help increase his attendance for 2011. He tells me he has an amazing idea, later on I'm booked as the headline act for AM2.

    But hey, I'm used to being excluded from popular events. Did you know I participated in the DC reboot? I was kicked out of the universe once and the writers did it again just for laughs.
    >> G !!0KLJYlknxts 09/03/11(Sat)12:53 No.4924033
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    Rodney, while /cgl/ is full of trolls sometimes, I'm glad you've been getting your respect here.
    >> Anonymous 09/03/11(Sat)14:23 No.4924262
    bump for moar
    >> Anonymous 09/03/11(Sat)14:42 No.4924329
    >>4924262
    Gotta have to wait for more. I have this material is kinda tricky to write for the OP.
    >> Anonymous 09/04/11(Sun)04:17 No.4926708
    this shit needs to get archived now!
    >> TL;DR 09/04/11(Sun)05:26 No.4926850
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    >
    But hey it's not like I caught myself a decent woman. My wife isn't too smart of a person. One time I saw her buying tickets to the zoo on account she wanted to see some Tiger and Bunny cosplay.

    >I knew the guy who ran Anime Expo and I asked him if there's any way I can help increase his attendance for 2011. He tells me he has an amazing idea, later on I'm booked as the headline act for AM2.

    LOL
    >> Anonymous 09/04/11(Sun)05:35 No.4926872
    stand up saturday?
    >> Anonymous 09/04/11(Sun)17:41 No.4928360
    Archive thi\s shit
    >> Rodney Dangerfield !!9zuxDxS8sln 09/05/11(Mon)00:46 No.4929866
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    So recently my wife has become a huge Miku fan which I don't understand. I ask her "honey, why do you like vocaloids, they put out fake songs." She says "The same way I married a sexaloid that puts out fake orgasms."

    It's a miracle that I'm getting sex at all as I'm not as handsome as I'm still wrestling with how bad I look. I can't even do any self-posts here on account it's a work safe board.

    I'm so ugly before I walk into a convention con ops has to peace bond my face because it can be used as a weapon.

    Heck, I'm so ugly that I'm the reason why Kubo always wears sunglasses.

    Worst part of it all is that I know I'm getting old. When I watch anime the only time I get that hot blooded feeling in my veins is right before a heart attack.
    >> Anonymous 09/05/11(Mon)02:01 No.4930134
    a great example of a good tripfag
    >> Anonymous 09/05/11(Mon)10:49 No.4931206
    Get back to page 1 and save us from the drama threads
    >> Anonymous 09/05/11(Mon)20:08 No.4933167
    >>4931206

    I agree, so bump to first page for you!
    >> Anonymous 09/05/11(Mon)22:58 No.4934151
    >>4933167
    we gotta save Rodney
    >> Anonymous 09/06/11(Tue)09:59 No.4935759
    fumping thor epic bread.
    >> Violin_Man !CXowQdGxzc 09/06/11(Tue)11:44 No.4935887
    Let Rodney's ugly mug reach the top!
    >> Anonymous 09/06/11(Tue)12:02 No.4935921
    Dammit I wish they could archive this thread and the last actor thead with Rock.
    >> Anonymous 09/06/11(Tue)18:18 No.4937029
    >>4935921
    Wow you're right, the last thread to get archived stared The Rock now it's looking like Rodney might get to share the spotlight
    >> Mango 09/06/11(Tue)21:11 No.4937650
    Sounds like cosplay isn't really what you're having trouble with - it's a symptom, a way for the real problem(s) to seep out. Cosplay is like some sort of sick orifice that all your personal problems can ooze out of. From your posts, it sounds more like an issue with your relationship with your wife than anything /cgl/ could possibly help you with. You also seem to have some major self-esteem issues, which isn't all that uncommon around these parts of the internetz.

    You're right - it's best you keep your problems far far away from this board. Confide in close friends, heck talk to your WIFE, not to this bunch of anonymous douchebags. You've made a mistake by commin'' round here with this kinda problem, you won't get anything constructive around here, best be leavin'.
    >> TL;DR 09/06/11(Tue)21:24 No.4937698
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    >>4937650
    wtf am I reading
    >> Anonymous 09/06/11(Tue)21:26 No.4937711
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    >>4937650
    >has never heard of Rodney Dangerfield.
    >> Anonymous 09/06/11(Tue)21:39 No.4937765
    GET THIS ARCHIVED NOW.
    >> Anonymous 09/07/11(Wed)00:06 No.4938414
    >>4935921
    The Rock's thread was indeed achieved.

    >>4937650
    >>4937650
    Wow, you are the real comedian of this thread
    >> Anonymous 09/07/11(Wed)00:44 No.4938481
    >>4937650
    DO YOU KNOW WHO FUCKING RODNEY DANGERFIELD IS?!
    >> Anonymous 09/07/11(Wed)10:28 No.4939416
    bumping
    >> Anonymous 09/07/11(Wed)17:37 No.4940533
    "Even in hell I get no respect"
    >> Anonymous 09/08/11(Thu)07:02 No.4942636
    hheh



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