Do we get dental?

>anyone on this image board
Gendo you dumb? They need to be born after the year 2000

>>35684637

Are you new here or something?

>According to my infinite interlocking schemes, I have concluded that anyone on this image board will do.
if yui doesnt want to sync with the dummy plugs, she sure as fuck doesnt want to sync with lonely virgin nerds who get mad about k-on

I can pilot it.

>>35684637
According to my data, you are all 8 years old, so you fit the bill.

>>35684628
No.

>>35684637
Most people here are <10 years old anyway.

>>35684652
Yui? My dead wife has nothing to do with it. Trust me, I wouldn't lie. Just ask my good friend, the trustworthy Governor Ondore.

>>35684669
I guess looking at the quality of the post, you would think this is an image board for 8 year olds. Bastard.

>>35684675
I agree my young friend

You're asking sexually reppressed nerds to sync with your wife?

You're fucking worse than Hohenheim...

>>35684697
Suddenly Gendo turns into a cat

This guy right here

Is it me, or does everyone on this board seem to have a dead mother............? Suspicious....

I'm not dead Father.
Tell me you love me.

>>35684697
Ondore of Bhujerba? Well if such a trustworthy fellow backs you, I guess we can believe you.

I'll do it!

>>35684746

You're dead to me, and that's enough.

>>35684746
Well, you will be soon, you're very ill.

>>35684729
.....Wait a second... You too?

>gendo: shinji I fucked your mom
>shinji: well I'm "inside" your wife right now

>>35684792
I'm getting better!

>>35684808
No, you're not -- you'll be stone dead in a moment.

Let me pilot it!

Pick this guy here.

>>35684828
YES YOUR HEART WILL DO

me

>>35684828
>>35684788
>>35684719
>>35684655
I'll need references, social security numbers, bank account numbers, mothers maiden names, and the place of residence for all immediate family members.

>>35684870

Am I the only one who was asked to bring lube??

>>35684870
I already turned mine in.

Fuck your unit 1.

Tell me your enemy and I'll beat him up with my bare hands!

>>35684669
WHAT

no fucking dental?

Gendo, don't shit me, NERV is like the fucking TOP place to work

social security number = 0123456789

bank account number = same as above

mother's maiden name = Oda

Place of residence for all immediate family = Tokyo

>>35684904
Hey Asuka, check out this giant pile of money.

>>35684928
Here's my ID.

>>35684964

Is it also under your pants? Like the last time you got me a present...

>>35684964

Well that's me off to /h/

Cya'll later

I could ride that robot.

>>35684928
It is. For me. And Fuyutski, but only because he beat me at cards.
>>35684926
A bunch of old men that live on the moon. Make sure to get their bank account numbers.

Don´t give me that EVA suit shit, the enemy is already dead.

>>35684938

Congratulations, you're in. We have assigned you to pilot Unit 00, because we believe is fits your heart perfectly.

>>35684982
No, it's in your mouth, to shut you up. Now go spend it on clothes or whatever keeps you teenage girls away from the police station.

>>35685033
But what about me?

>>35684964
>>35684982
OTOU-SAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>>35685035
What would you do if I said the police might receive an "anonymous letter" soon?

>>35684990
>Still thinks that mecha battle suits are robots

Oh wait... it´s Yotsuba.

ABANDON SHIP

>>35685062
What ABOUT you?

>>35685078
I'd have you and everyone you care about disappear.

Gundamium alloy suits are for weaklings.

>>35685035

Tell....Your...glargagb...Son....To...Get...OFF...gaglaerllag....

X_X

Say Kaiji, where's that gambler cousin of yours? HE seems angsty enough to be a pilot.

>>35685126

>X_X

Fun's over guys, move along

>>35685126
Godammit Shinji, now I have to find a pilot for Unit 2 as well.

Name:Misato´s Bewbs
References:I´m Misato´s rack, she is a commander.

Who's the big daddy now, father?

>>35685145

YYYYEEEEAAAAHHHH!!

>>35685145
Sorry Commander, he lost his fingers in a bet,

>>35685205

I can do it.

>>35684763
DON'T BELIEVE ONDORE'S LIES!

Shinji Ikari.

Let me pilot Unit 01.

>>35685268

ZA BEASTO mode. Permanently.

I can pilot it

>>35684614
I'll give you a free chair if I can pilot that thing.

>>35685301
Oh hey a female applWAIT A MINUTE.

He thinks I can't ride the robot...

>>35685320
How's the seat?

Asuka brought her german boyfriend! He is ready to man the machine! JAA!!!

>>35685332
I could be the sister

So let me pilot it!

Open a hole to other dimensions and kidnap the Shinjis from those dimensions.

BREAKING NEWS BREAKING NEWS

>>35685356
Feels good man.

Let me pilot that thing.
Yotsuba´s retarded.

>>35685205

I can pilot it. I already know it's Asuka's mother in there and everything

>>35685427

I think I found a new pilot for 01

>>35685442
Shaddap Yotsuba, you´re still under discipline.

>>35685440

....................................MARI IS THAT YOU?!

>>35685460

>>35685461

Fucking hell

WHY do you even need a pilot, Gendo?

>>35685424
Okay you can have unit 1.

That Kubo guy has unit 0.

So who should pilot unit 2...

>>35685554

I'll wear a plug test suit if I can pilot it

>>35685501

I.....I knew it....

>>35685554

You should pick me! I know everything about robots!

>>35685534
>>35685534
Because if I vacate my throne of forged paperwork and giant piles of money for even a moment, the whole operation would collapse.

>>35685478
Deal with it.

>>35685584

Then...ITS SETTLED

>>35685618
Yotsuba.

NO.

>>35685652

I CAN PILOT IT!

>>35685651

Alright!

>>35685682
Qualifications?

Also, no 6 year olds, sorry Yotsuba.

>>35685651
>>35685584
I'm not making any calls on you until my 2.22 BD Rip is finished downloading.

>>35685670
You go home Yotsuba.
I´ve got business here.

>>35685723

Come on, don't be so uptight...

>>35685723
By the way, these are my qualifications if you need them.

Let me in and I'll make the show actually good.

>>35685773
You fail. Get flatter.

>>35685554

You will let me pilot that.

>>35685773
I don't need more tits.

>>35685794

shut it DFC maniac

>>35685813
Don't tell me you have more than enough tits.

>>35685857
Have you SEEN my life?

I could pilot unit 02 for you, Gendo.

>>35685813

Mine are bigger though

Will there be tea and women?

>>35685857
Whenever Gendo wants more tits he just throws another one of those "breast inspections"

>>35685879

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RsepQh342g

>>35685879
Full of scoring bitches and whores. Yes I have seen it

>>35685896
Yes, but all if it is mine.

>>35685734

GENDO MY FRIEND!

>>35685554
ne~ ne~ let me pilot it

I AM THE BEST PILOT FOR EVA

i'll pilot if you let me nail asuka

>>35685970
OCELOT, MY MAN! HOW YA DOING?

Oh hey, I've got a spare robot lying around, want to pilot it? EASY MONEY.

I could become the best Unit 02 pilot the world has ever seen, ~desu

>>35685989
No, the pilot will be me.

>>35686005

If you get the job, let me pilot it and I'll let you nail me

>>35685989

No. Your responsibilities lie with the White Base. What if someone died?

>>35686047
Goddamn slut.

Let me. I can drive. I can pilot.
I can do anything you bitches can, and I'll even take care of the kids.

>>35684637
>>35684669
I'm 8 years old! Hooray.
All those things I could do with this...endless possibilities.

Does the job pay good?

>>35686009
Sounds good to me. Do I get Dental?

>>35686062
But you're stupid. Osaka can do a better job than you.

>>35686047

Zeon has enough units for you.

One of our pilots was turned into a hamburger a short while ago, you can take his Zaku.

>>35686059

You say that but I know you want it

>>35686117

Only interested in Eva's sorry

Offering myself as a pilot to test unit 04 during S2 engine activation

>>35686102
Sure thing. Here's the keys to your new locker.

Let me pilot. All those angels are mere frogs before my strength.

>>35686117
Hey, that's not fair. Why do I always get the short end of the stick around here?

>>35686151
According to your resume, your only skills are cooking and structural analysis.

>>35686123
You'd be right about that.
My dick itches so much...

>>35686117
>One of our pilots was turned into a hamburger a short while ago
Oh, fuck you. ;_;

...

I shall pilot. I cannot die.

YOU HAVE TO LET ME PILOT EVA, I HAVE TO STOP TETSUO!

>>35686208

good boy

>>35686184

I can pilot it.

you know who to choose

>>35686205
But the advert specified no skills whatsoever were required to pilot unit 04!

What if you had a giant dinosaur piloting a giant robot?

I shall pilot it for I am the strongest warrior in the universe. Hell, just show those enemies of yours to me and skip all this piloting business.

>>35686377

Someone called?

GENIE!
Make me the pilot for Eva unit 01!

>>35686383

Here

>>35684614

I heard you have a job for a mechanaut.
I have lots of experience with those and need a new job after my previous employer closed while I was on a short vacation trip.

>>35686425
Hmmm...looks like I may need to pilot that robot after all.

>>35686440

I hope you were payed during that vacation trip.

LET ME PILOT THE FUCKING THING

Oh, but don't call any of my references. Also, they're lying.

You fags can all pilot Unit 01 for all I care...

At least I'll be having a great time in bed with Asuka tonight.

>>35684982
Did she die in the movie or something?

If you would be willing to arrange a accident for a certain blue haired idiot, i would gladly ride your Mechas... Or you.

>>35686543
Can I just choose the second option?

>>35686440

Can I pilot too?!

>>35686561

Fuck ac accidental spoiler

>>35686543
I'm on the case. Which blue one? Rei? Or Misato? Or HELL YEAH THE ENTIRE MOTHERFUCKIN EARTH.

>>35686561
Aren't you already a machine?

>>35686599

That doesn't matter
If I want to pilot it, all I need is hard work and guts!!

>>35686498

I wish, they got relatively fast out of buisness...

>>35686638

>relatively

OH YOU!

>>35684614
Nigga let me pilot the thing.

I will do it. I will carry the ring into Mordor. In an Eva.

>>35686561
>>35686631

Disregard that, I don't need an EVA unit.
Because a true pilot already has an EVA in his heart!

Let me pilot. My referral is the spade I'm hiding and the numerous traps I've laid around your office.

>>35686685

Agreed

I'll do it. I have enough angst and enough experience with ships to meet your qualifications.

>>35686685

Does that EVA have a gun?

>>35686780
Crawl back to your potions lab.

Sure ill pilot it. Souneds like fun

I'm black. Let me pilot or I'll scream racist.

>>35686848
Way to go, thread killer.

>>35686800

SUUUUGOOOOOOOOOOOOI

>>35686887
There's only room for one Miria on /a/. And it isn't the thief.

>>35687002

Isaac and Miria are above time and space, good and evil, god and science.

They cannot be hated. They cannot be trolled.

mi mi fa so so fa mi re
do do re mi mi re re
mi mi fa so so fa mi re
da da re mi re do do

You will never pilot an EVA ;_;

>leave office for awhile
>suddenly, applications EVERYWHERE

Anyway there's no point to aruging anymore, I've already given 0-2 to Kubo, that guy that gave me this talking chair, and Ocelot. 3 and 6 are taken, and 5 is destroyed.

I guess if you REALLY want to I can let you test drive 04 but I don't think you really want that one.

>>35688636
I'm OK with that, I bet it feels awful.

>>35688941
I'll TAKE IT

I'll pilot it, nya~

>>35688985
No, go back to being dead and failing to troll MTV.

>>35684697
>ondore
I'm surprised people still remember that

>>35689158

>>35689171
/v/ never shuts up about. Personally, I never saw the big deal about that section of the game.

>>35689158

>failing to troll MTV

That's not how I remember it.