A compilement of the worlds most K-k00l superhero: G. I. M0e Written by: B0b Vi0lence ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Teenagers with new ways of copywriting software. Their enemy is the ruthless forces of NoBra, an organazation of younger prepubesant sisters who need to use the phone while your on-line. Yo Moe! Date ->11/08/86 13:46:51 d lewd jokes on the phone lines. A little background on GI M0e: someone who hacked it out and logged on as him only to propose marriage to any and every female on the board... This, to Jeffery, was the last straw. He would now pursue a lifelong quest to Enter the FBI. In an attempt to log on to the "Emergency BBS", a subtle joke left by the purveyors of fine filth themselves, the Dark Brothers, Jeffery got into lots of trouble their busy schedule of removing crimnals off the streets to send one of their guys in a nice suit with a very large gun concealed inside it to visit Jeffery. Imagine surprise when Jeffery's mom opened up the door only to find out that her "little button" was violating a few tiny, tiny laws... Most of them were normal looking human beings without the steel chins of Dick Tracy. Jeffery was about to start something he would never regret... eal" with Jeffery. Since they had nothing really better to do with him, torture was now unfavored as a means of interrogation thanks to J. Edgar, the figured maybe they could keep the kid busy by getting him to help them stamp out the threat to all boards-- MUNCHKINS!!!!!!!!111!!11!11!1!1!111!1!!!!11!!!1 They gave him one of their confiscated 300/1200 baud modems and Jeffery went merrily on his way... Sub ->More M0e History From ->ECHO BUNNYMAN (#19) Date ->11/16/86 20:53:21 Little Jeffery was not alone in his fight, indeed the FBI had handpicked over thirty differnt youngsters to complete this task, all with veried background, and many with funny accents. Together they were quarted at Fort Dicks New Jersey. In a room they would soon call The Pit. The first problem to overcome was the one of drafting children into the armed forces. Well that wasn't really that hard, the kids did it themsleves, hacked into the files. Next and most perilous of all was the assignment of nifty Code Names for the kids. Little Bobby was called Water Spout, because he wet his bed. Little Jose was called Wet Back because he had the bunk under bobby. Susan was called Headlights. Why, we still don't know. Jim was called Mercutio, because he knew all the lines. Eric was called Deep Throat because of a former job. Scott was called Grumpy, because he was... think of anything else. Sub ->GI Moe: The First Mission From ->PSI ROGUE (#179) The trouble alert went off and the mo3z assembled in the assembly room (clever, up to the podium. His name is Dude and no other description need be given. "G.I. M0e, our first mission has come in. The 'higher-ups' have targetted a den of software piracy for us to destroy. It's called Star Warez and it's based in Denver. we will send three of our agents to infiltrate it. Once inside, we will identify the worst of the pirates and destroy them. But beware! Once we start going after these pirates, we'll have to act quickly before our agents are de- validated and thus unable to crash Star Warez." He flips open a folder. "We are sending Water Spout, Skirts, and Hawk. Good luck, M0ez." The assembly then unassembles and out three of our heroes(?) head for their terminals. Logging on, they can determine nothing about the board. They leave false information and hold their breathes for 24 hours (actually they all pass out way before then). Anyhow, 24 hours later they re-log on. Skirts is logged on under the pseudo-alias of Radios Hack. Hawk is on as Ware Wolf. Water Spout wasn't validated. all he got was a short note from the system operator saying, "I'm not validating anyone who doesn't use lower case!" Water Spout was out but he did reveal a vital clue... the message was signed by SisOp, a known leader of NoBra! G.I.M0e had accidentally discovered a NoBra base, but could they do anything about it with only two m0ez? Short Biography of the SisOp -------------------------------- Little is truly known about her though much is speculated from rumors. It seems she was the typical annoying sister who kept trying to get her brother off the phone when he was using his modem. But things were not that simple. A few months later, her brother died in a mysterious accident involving his Surge Regulator. The girl then became obsessed with the computer, partly because she couldn't imagine what her brother did there and partly because she still hadn't developed br**sts (sorry, don't know if that word's legal around here). In a matter of years, she had logged on to a number now quite mad. Not crazy, but you'd be Eventually, she was contacted by NoBra and SisOp soon became one of their leaders. It is rumored that she gives out the user's phone numbers to the FBI. Sub ->The Federation BBS:m0e ]I[ From ->B0B VI0LENCE (#69) And so there was a more pressing thing for the m0e gang-- the Federation. orking for a lie appropriate ones for this mission. Their handles alone would gain them validation into the p Water Spout knew what to do: He logged on and, after being non-call validated at figured, was to wait until the System Operator took time out of his busy schedule to call him Meanwhile, back at the ranch, HeadLights had gotton into some in depth conversation who could give it to him. She had scheduled a meeting with the illustrious Captain, at his house in a quiet, secluded suburb. She would have dinner with him, talk a bit and, when he wasn't looking, break into monitor and type JSR $FCE2, sending the Federation on a final voyage. Meanwhile, still back at the rance, and rather close to Star Warez, Skirts had broken through the validation barrier and was face-to-face with the head of NoBra (and yes, she DID have dirt on her knees): SisOp. Skirts was a pretty macho kind of guy. The type that has tuna fish sandwich under his arm for that unique smell that lasts for weeks. He could fulfill SisOp's wish and get in a few lustful moments at the same time. But that wasn't his goal. His goal was to help fight the neverending supply of munchkins. He would have to hurry, though, because Christmas was coming very soon, and where there's Christmas, there's parents buying their children modems and those very same children figuring out how those modems connect and later figuring out that it is more fun to dial out than it is to send a 300 baud carrier signal when the ir sister is on the phone with her boyfriend... It was a matter of weeks before the insurgents would come. Time was precious.