In any organization there will always be one person who knows what's 
going on.  This person must be identified and fired.
  There's 3 kinds of people - those who can count & those who can't
  No, that chair isn't saved. But we're praying for it!
  >>> Pardon my driving; I'm trying to reload. <<<
  I'd Have Written Sooner But I Thought I Owed You Money.
  Incontinence Hotline...Can you hold, please?
  Looking out for #1, trying not to step in #2.
  Today's subliminal message is             .
  People who kill people give guns a bad name
  If it ain't broke, let me have a shot at it....
  Diplomacy: Saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock
  Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
  "Did ya put the cat out?" "I didn't know it was burning"
  The floggings will continue until morale improves.
  43.3% of statistics are meaningless!
  Psychoceramics....The Study of Crackpots
  Necrophilia: a dead art..
  The best alternative to INTELLIGENCE is SILENCE.
  The worst thing about censorship is лллллллллл.
  It's always darkest just before you step on the cat.
  Gotta run, the cat's caught in the printer.
  Madness takes its toll; please have exact change...
  Bacon & eggs - Hens are involved but pigs are committed.
  Which is the non-smoking lifeboat?
  Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
  |||||||//////__ __ __ __ __    The domino effect at work.
  I've upped my standards. Now, up yours.
  One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
  All this significance - what does it mean?
  Thank you for not annoying me more than you do...
  TURN OFF YOUR CAT & SPEAK DIRECTLY INTO YOUR POWER SAW
  If idiots could fly, this would be an airport
  Everyone is entitled to my opinion.
  Beware of a half truth; you may be getting the wrong half
  It's not 55mph, it's 147,840 furlongs per fortnight
  Your home, and indeed some Cadillacs, have more computing power
than many third-world nations. -- Daniel Siewiorek
  Most visions of an ideal society don't take into account that the 
idealogical descendants of Ghengis Khan and Attila the Hun are alive 
& well & sitting next to you on the bus. Jim Porcher 198?
  Thank you for holding your breath while I smoke
  I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it?
  Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
  Why can't women put the toilet seat back up?
  And Adam asked "What's a Headache?"
  Millihelen: Unit of beauty needed to launch 1 ship
  Do Not Attempt to Traverse a Chasm in Two Leaps
  "Keep the smoke inside." -- 1st Rule of Electronics
  I am the root of some evil... send some money.
  The buck doesn't even slow down here!
  If you think talk is cheap, try hiring a lawyer.
  What exactly is a "sex probe"?
  Ensign Pillsbury?  He's BREAD, Jim!
  Be Alert! The world needs more lerts.
  Don't be sexist. Broads hate that.
  I just bought a cured ham. Wonder what it had?
  We've replaced the Dilithium with new Folgers Crystals.
  Give a man a fish, and he is fed for a day.  Show him how to fish,
and he is fed for his life.
  Oh, no! Not ANOTHER learning experience!
  The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.
  He who laughs last is S-L-O-W.
  Stupidity does not qualify as a handicap, park elsewhere!
  The buck stops at the desk over there.
  Don't take life too seriously, it's not permanent.
  The leading cause of statistics is smoking.
  If ya can't say anything nice, sit by me.
  Warranty --- If it breaks, both halves are yours
  My mind ain't so open that anything can crawl right in.
  Software Independent: Won't work with ANY software.
  Press to test.  Release to detonate.
  Peck! Peck! Peck! ... Boom! .... Chicken in a Minefield.
  Support the right to arm bears
  To err is human; to moo bovine
  We do precision guesswork
  Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate.
  AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse
  Don't play STUPID with me...I'm BETTER at it !!!
  I started out with nothing. I still have most of it. Davis
  If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it.
  I have one nerve left and you're getting on it...
  Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
  "Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage 
to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
  Dijon vu: the feeling you've tasted this mustard before.
  Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
  How do I set my Laser Printer to "STUN"?
  Driving Lesson One: Shiny side up; rubber side down.
  A rock----------->me<------------A hard place
  Professionals built the Titanic, amateurs built the ark.
  26% of Canadians can't read. The other 92% can't do Math
  Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either.