Subject: Martial Law Declared [Weekly Posting] From: "Wes Payne" Date: 1998/06/08 Organization: Church of Divine Tastelessness Newsgroups: alt.tasteless Emperor Ming's Martial Law FAQ Last modified: 980316 >WELCOME TO ALT.TASTELESS Hints on posting here: Find out what you're doing before you start. The consequences might be rather painful if you fuck up. But don't worry, we always welcome new fine posters to our group. You might even have something to add to our eternal and wonderful discussion. You will know that when you know the group. A quick and entertaining way to do this, is to read the FAQ. It's called Welcome to alt.tasteless [Monthly Posting] and is to be found somewhere in this group. If you can't find it here or in news.answers, then send email to mail-server@rtfm.mit.edu with the line "send usenet/alt.tasteless/tasteless-faq" in the body of the message, and the server will mail the FAQ to you. Impatient WEB types can find the full FAQ at the following URL: http://www.aracnet.com/~jaydog/index2.html Why this Martial Law FAQ: The level of noise, i.e., the amount of COMPLETELY USELESS STUPID CUNT CRAP postings by SMALL BRAINED WEENIES THAT ARE LOOKED DOWN UPON BY EVERY REAL A.T'ER, has made reading alt.tasteless less pleasant than it should be. To counter this we've decided to hurt people who are out of line. With this weekly informative posting no-one can claim ignorance. Because after reading this you know that: You should've read the FAQ before posting. You should hang out on the side lines for a while to get an idea of what is appreciated here and what's not. The regulars in this newsgroup have nothing against newbies, per se; they are simply concerned about quality control. They also have nothing against users from a given service provider, such as AOL. Several good posters are not only newbies, but post from AOL as well. Bad behaviour == contentless "me too" or "I agree" postings (should have used email). Posts with many lines of attribution (old, quoted text) and a single word or line added agreeing or disagreeing. Simple, really. People with itchy keyboard fingers (a.k.a. postarrhea) who post any lamebrained comments that pop into their heads without considering whether it is *really* funny or worthy of other people's time, will will have their noses rubbed in it by newbies and regulars alike. Crossposting. More noise is generated by this activity than any other in a.t. Almost all crossposting starts in other groups by people who think that when they say the word "shit" during a protracted flame-war that it is appropriate to crosspost their inane flames into a.t. Once again, these people have no idea what a.t is all about; they usually never read the group. Crossposting *out* of a.t into another group is a somewhat less dubious practice, yet it is still responsible for a lot of noise. Don't do it unless you can be very certain that it will be extremely amusing to everyone on a.t. We no longer do invasions, BTW. The novelty of that wore off years ago. Binaries, i.e., uuencoded GIF's of your mother on the crapper should NOT be posted to alt.tasteless. Post them to alt.binaries.pictures.tasteless where they belong and will be appreciated. Previously, by a unanimous vote taken in both alt.tasteless and alt.config any binaries posted to alt.tasteless were forge CANCELLED and replaced in alt.binaries.pictures.tasteless. Since then, by another unanimous vote in alt.tasteless, this policy was further modified as follows: binary posts are subject to automatic cancellation, and will NOT be relocated. None of us want to hear any of your shit about this policy even if, for some reason, you think you're important enough to usurp the consensus indicated by a straw poll where not a single respondent came out in favor of binaries on a.t., so can it. Look around you, folks. What do you see? Reams and reams of garbage. Not the kind of garbage that inspires one to nausea. Not disposable diapers full of shit with a cancerous, deformed rat wallowing in it. Not even a disemboweled vagina, oozing pus, and wrapped in a blood soaked pair of women's underwear. No, the kind of garbage you see in alt.tasteless these days is the boring, useless trash which emanates from the keyboards of people who have no idea what this newsgroup is about. And -if- you look around, you won't need anyone to tell you that the level of this type of unwanted trash is quickly rising, and threatens to suffocate us all. You most likely came to this newsgroup to be grossed out, to be entertained with sickmaking humor, and possibly to share a bit of your own twisted, throbbing mind with all of us. We welcome you. If the amount of boring, repetitive drek that you find instead makes you the least bit angry; if you feel cheated, then we *strongly* encourage you to encourage quality, discourage unwanted trash. It doesn't matter if you've never posted here before. If you spot *anyone* (this includes the "regulars") posting useless, boring, mindless garbage, then flame their asses off for it. Do it in email, or, if it's a *really* good mean-hearted flame, then post it. (Don't allow yourself to become embroiled in a long debate in the newsgroup, however. Take it to email, if you must.) ATer's *will* back you up on your criticism, and will be appreciative of your time and effort in helping to bring alt.tasteless back to the gurgling cesspool of wretched filth that we all want it to be. And if you are one of those who post without thinking, then take heed: You are strongly encouraged not to waste everyone's time. Darling, I'm biting you in the part of your scrotum closest to your arsehole. Don't mess with a band of testis suckers!!! If you haven't read the FAQ, get it before you do anything else in alt.tasteless...it'll be the wisest thing for everyone concerned. >Martial Law until further notice. ming@cyphyn.radnet.com (Emperor Ming) -- Wes Payne, known to you as: n9548326@wwu.cc.edu Church of Divine Tastelessness -- Quality Control Task Force Switch 'wwu' with 'cc' to get correct e-mail address -- I hate SPAM "When you said ''HEAVILY FORESTED'' it reminded me of an overdue CLEANING BILL.. Don't you SEE? O'Grogan SWALLOWED a VALUABLE COIN COLLECTION and HAD to murder the ONLY MAN who KNEW!!"