THE 15- MINUTE ASSIST

A lecture given on 19 June 1950

A Demonstration

LRH:

All right. Now, what is worrying you?

PC:

(fearful, griefy voice) I don’t know.

LRH:

What’s the first moment you started to worry?

PC:

I started to worry since I got back here after lunch.

LRH:

And what happened? Who did you meet when you got back here after lunch?

PC:

I met a gentleman named Mr. Thomas, to whom I was explaining the things that had happened to people here.

LRH:

And what happened?

PC:

I started to worry.

LRH:

All right. What did he say that started to worry you?

PC:

He didn’t say anything. I started to think about how everybody else has had so much better result than I. And that I hadn’t done any auditing or anything. I’m terribly scared.

LRH:

Scared of what?

PC:

Oh, probably scared to run somebody and find that it was comparable to what I may find.

LRH:

Comparable to what?

PC:

To what I may find.

LRH:

In your own bank?

PC:

In my own bank.

LRH:

Are you frightened of restimulation?

PC:

Apparently.

LRH:

Who have you run?

PC:

I haue never run anybody.

LRH:

You haven’t run anybody. What engrams did you listen to lately that affected you badly? (pause) You can remember this.

PC:

None but my own.

LRH:

You’ve listened to one of your own?

PC:

The only one that restimulated me badly was my mother saying, Pamela, you must always be a lady.

LRH:

Hm. You remember that suddenly?

PC:

I haven’t thought of anything else practically since last night. And it was too late to run it last night.

LRH:

You can remember when she said this. Right here in present time you can remember when she said this.

PC:

Well, she always said it.

LRH:

Yah, but what’s the first time you recall her saying it?

PC:

I was 3 years old.

LRH:

And where were you standing?

PC:

I wasn’t standing. I was sitting in a little rocking chair.

LRH:

Now what does she say to you?

PC:

She said, Now you must be a lady tonight. We’re going out.

LRH:

Hm- hm.

PC:

And I want you to be a lady.

LRH:

Hm- hm. And what effect did it have on you when she said that, at that time?

PC:

Well, I thought how foolish. I’m going to behave properly.

LRH:

All right. What was wrong with being a lady?

PC:

Nothing’s wrong with being a lady. Being a lady’s fine.

LRH:

What’s wrong with being criticized by Mama?

PC:

It’s unnecessary.

LRH:

What’s liable to happen if Mama criticizes you?

PC:

Then I get all tied up inside and I want to cry.

LRH:

If Mama criticizes you?

PC:

(tearfully) Yes.

LRH:

What’s liable to happen? You remember this.

PC:

If she criticizes me?

LRH:

You can remember what followed one of these criticisms.

PC:

The only thing that I can remember is that she is such a lady and that I am apparently not.

LRH:

And you can remember her mentioning something like this. You remember her mentioning something like this?

PC:

Pamela, you re a terrible tomboy.

LRH:

Hm- hm. And when did she say this?

PC:

I think I was 3.

LRH:

When did she say this? Where was she? Where were you?

PC:

I was in the kitchen.

LRH:

And what happened?

PC:

And I was dirty.

LRH:

Hm- hm. What had you gotten into?

PC:

Oh, I was out playing with all the boys. There were no girls in my neighborhood that I cared particularly about.

LRH:

And she said you were a tomboy?

PC:

Yes.

LRH:

This upset you?

PC:

Well, sure.

LRH:

Criticism by Mama, very upsetting.

PC:

Very upsetting.

LRH:

Extremely upsetting?

PC:

Oh, terribly upsetting.

LRH:

All right. What particular moment that she criticized you did it really upset you?

PC:

(pause) I can’t get it.

LRH:

There’s a real bad one, when she really upset you. You can remember it. She really upset you.

PC:

Well, it’s something about spilling milk on the table. I’ve never liked milk.

LRH:

Never liked milk?

PC:

No.

LRH:

You spilled milk on the table?

PC:

Yes.

LRH:

What happened to you when you spilled the milk on the table?

PC:

I had to get out and eat in the kitchen with the maid whom I didn’t like because she wasn’t very bright.

LRH:

Hm- hm.

PC:

And that type of conversation didn’t appeal to me.

LRH:

What happened when you had to go eat with the maid?

PC:

She laughed at me.

LRH:

She laughed at you.

PC:

Yes.

LRH:

What’s liable to happen to you if your mother criticizes you?

PC:

People are apt to laugh at me.

LRH:

Who else laughed at you when your mother criticized you? What body of company?

PC:

There was nobody there, it was just a family dinner.

LRH:

Just a family dinner.

PC:

Yes.

LRH:

What did your father say?

PC:

My father said, That damn kid is so clumsy. Get her out of here.

LRH:

Hm- hm. Which meant what?

PC:

Get her out of here.

LRH:

Hm- hm.

PC:

Let s not have this thing around at all. It’s a feeling of rejection, I think.

LRH:

Hm- hm. You recall him saying this?

PC:

Yes, of course I do.

LRH:

Where were you sitting when he said it?

PC:

He was sitting at the head of the table, Iamathisleft.

LRH:

Okay. Now do you remember him saying this?

PC:

Get that damn kid out of here. Sure.

LRH:

Get that damn thing out of there.

PC:

That damn kid. Hm.

LRH:

Close your eyes.

PC:

Hm- hm.

LRH:

The somatic strip can go right back to the beginning of that incident. Get that damn thing out of here. Get that damn thing out of there. Contact the first part of that incident. Contact it. Contact it. You can. What are the first words in it now, honey? What are the first words? When I count from one to five, you’ll give me the first words in sequence. One- two- three- four- five (snap!). You know what they are. Get that damn thing out of there. Repeat that.

PC:

Get that damn thing out of there. Get that damn thing out of there. It’s something that’s in the way, in a room.

LRH:

Contact his voice.

PC:

It’s something that’s standing in the middle of the room. Mother’s moved the furniture. Get that damn thing out of there, Julie.

LRH:

Hm- hm.

PC:

It has no place in a bedroom. Now what is it? I don’t know. A piece of furniture.

LRH:

All right. Now let’s go to another incident, another earlier incident. Get that damn thing out of here.

PC:

(pause; whispers) Get that damn thing out of there.

LRH:

You’ve got to get that damn thing out of there.

PC:

Got to get that damn thing out of there.

LRH:

Contact his voice.

PC:

Lets get that damn thing out of here. I can’t.

LRH:

Contact your father.

PC:

I can’t see him. Got to get that damn thing out of there.

LRH:

All right. Now, contact your mother saying this.

PC:

Got to get that damn thing out of there. Got to get that damn thing out of there. I think— do you suppose she’s trying to get rid of me?

LRH:

Well, let’s see what you think. Let’s contact the somatic on it.

PC:

(anguished voice) Well, that’s what I got.

LRH:

All right. What’s she saying?

PC:

I He got to get that damn thing out of here.

LRH:

Go on over it again.

PC:

I ve got to get that damn thing out of here.

LRH:

What else is she saying?

PC:

And she’s saying, It’s such a terrific bother.

LRH:

Go on over that again.

PC:

Its such a terrific bother.

LRH:

What else is she saying?

PC:

Well, that’s all she says right now. She says (I wonder if it’s the one I picked up the other night?) that summer is coming on, and I’ve got all these new clothes, and I can’t be bothered.

LRH:

Hm- hm.

PC:

And everybody else is going to have fun and there I’ll be stuck.

LRH:

All right. Go over that again.

PC:

The whole thing from the beginning?

LRH:

All right.

PC:

summers coming on and I’ve got all these new clothes.

LRH:

Now get I’m afraid. I’m afraid.

PC:

I m afraid. I’m afraid.

LRH:

Go over it again. I’m afraid.

PC:

I m afraid. I’m afraid I’m pregnant again. I’m afraid I’m pregnant again. That’s not right. I’m afraid.

LRH:

I’m afraid I’m pregnant.

PC:

I m afraid I’m pregnant.

LRH:

I’m afraid of what will happen to me. I’m afraid of what will happen to me. What’s this business I’m afraid?

PC:

There must be tears connected with it.

LRH:

Yes. I’m afraid.

PC:

I m afraid.

LRH:

What’s she afraid of? I’m afraid.

PC:

(sigh) To hare another baby, I lost the first one.

LRH:

I’m afraid.

PC:

I m afraid to hare another baby. I lost the first one.

LRH:

Contact her tears.

PC:

(sobbing) In the first place, it’s too awful to take.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

Suddenly, life is so wretched.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

(sobbing)

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

I haven’t had a moment’s peace.

LRH:

Continue. (pause) Continue.

PC:

Oh God, (tearfully) there are all these emotional feelings.

LRH:

All right. Let’s go back to the beginning of it and run it again, honey. Let’s go back to the beginning and run it again.

PC:

I m afraid I’m pregnant again. And I don’t want another baby right now because I lost the first one. (sigh) And this will probably be a girl and Jim wants a boy so badly.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

(gasp) I’ve got all these pretty clothes and summer’s coming on and I’m not going to get to go anywhere.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

Yes, there are a lot of tears— sorry for yourself. (pause)

LRH:

All right. Let’s contact the beginning of it now. What’s she saying? Where does the word lady appear in this? Lady.

PC:

Lady doesn’t appear.

LRH:

Lady. Where does lady appear?

PC:

Oh, I’d like to dress up and be a lady, or something.

LRH:

All right. Let’s go over that again.

PC:

I’d like to dress up and be a lady of leisure.

LRH:

Go over it again.

PC:

I’d like to dress up and be a lady of leisure, and here I think I’m pregnant again and I’don’t want to be. (sigh)

LRH:

Continue, honey. Contact her tears.

PC:

(sigh) Oh, she’s terribly sorry for herself.

LRH:

You know about this. (pause; PC whimpering) Is your father present?

PC:

No. She’s all by herself in the living room.

LRH:

I’ve got to get rid of this thing.

PC:

I Me got to get rid of this thing somehow. It’s just impossible. Jim was drunk half the time, and I lost the first baby, and it probably won’t be a boy and that’s what he wants. And the whole thing is impossible to endure.

LRH:

Okay. Go over that last one again.

PC:

The whole thing is impossible to end ure.

LRH:

Go over it again.

PC:

The whole thing is impossible to end ure.

LRH:

Go over it again, honey.

PC:

The whole thing is impossible to end ure.

LRH:

All right. Let’s get back to the beginning of it. Contact the earliest moment of it.

PC:

I think I’m pregnant again, and I’don’t want to be pregnant. And I’ve got all these new clothes. (sigh) I’don’t want another baby because it probably won’t be a boy and that’s what Jim wants. The whole thing is impossible to endure because.... (sigh)

LRH:

Continue, honey.

PC:

I’don’t know.

LRH:

Yes, you do.

PC:

The whole thing is impossible.

LRH:

I’m afraid.

PC:

I m afraid I’m pregnant again.

LRH:

Continue. What’s the one about the lady now?

PC:

(coughs) I’d like to get dressed up and be a lady of leisure.

LRH:

Let’s contact this.

PC:

(That s silly.) I’d like to get dressed up and be a lady of leisure in the summer.

LRH:

Continue, honey.

PC:

I have all these pretty clothes and I want to wear them. (sigh)

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

I don’t know.

LRH:

Yes, you do.

PC:

No, (half laugh, then despairingly) where do I go?

LRH:

I’ve got to get this thing out of here.

PC:

I’ve got to get this thing out of here.

LRH:

What is the right phrase there? Got to get this thing out of here?

PC:

(moan) Oh, no.

LRH:

Just repeat the phrase. Got to get this thing out of here.

PC:

I ve got to get this thing out of here.

LRH:

Repeat the phrase again.

PC:

I ve got to get this thing out of here.

LRH:

Go on over it again.

PC:

I ve got to get this thing out of here. (starts laughing)

LRH:

Okay.

PC:

Oh, oh dear. Hoo!

LRH:

Go over it again.

PC:

I ve got to get this thing out of here.

LRH:

All right. Contact the first part of it. First part of the engram now. Let’s run it on through.

PC:

Mother’s standing in the living room looking in that oval mirror (much more cheerfully) and she thinks she’s awful cute, and she says, Oh, I’m afraid I’m pregnant again and I don’t.... Oh, dear. (laughs)

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

(laughing) Oh, my. I want to get all dressed up and be a lady of leisure.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

I’ve got all these pretty clothes.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

(pause) And it won’t be a boy and Jim wants a boy, and I don’t see why I should bother anyway because he’s drunk all the time and he probably wouldn’t even know. And I don’t think that’s very good. Doesn’t sound right to me.

LRH:

All right. I’m stuck.

PC:

I’m stuck.

LRH:

I’m stuck what?

PC:

I’m stuck. I’m stuck with that old buzzard and....

LRH:

Go over it again.

PC:

And because I am a Stuart, and Stuarts are always ladies we do not get d ivorced .

LRH:

Oh. Let’s go over that again.

PC:

(laughs) Stuarts are always ladies and they have a status in this town and we do not get divorced, so I’m stuck with him.

LRH:

All right. Let’s go over that again.

PC:

Stuarts are always ladies, and because I am a lady I will not get divorced and I’m stuck with him.

LRH:

Uh- huh. Let’s run the whole thing from beginning to end now.

PC:

I am afraid I’m pregnant.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

And I have all these pretty clothes and summer’s coming on and I want to wear them.

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

And it s going to be a girl not a boy. And I lost the first boy. And....

LRH:

Continue.

PC:

I’m stuck with this old drunk. And I’m a Stuart, and Stuarts are always ladies, and therefore (laughs) I’ve got to be a lady so I’m stuck with him and I can’t divorce him.

LRH:

All right. Now is this a different engram?

PC:

No, it seems to me it’s the same thing; we’re all in the living room all at the same time— my mother and I.

LRH:

All right. Got to get rid of this thing.

PC:

Got to get rid of this thing. Get rid of this thing.

LRH:

It’s impossible to endure. There, let’s get that phrase.

PC:

Its impossible to endure.

LRH:

Let’s go over that phrase again.

PC:

That’s pretty well gone. It’s impossible to endure. It’s impossible to endure. It’s impossible to endure.

LRH:

All right. Let’s contact the first part of it. Now let’s run it.

PC:

It seems to me she’s being very light- minded about the whole thing.

LRH:

Hm- hm.

PC:

I’m afraid I’m pregnant again.

LRH:

Hm- hm.

PC:

And I’m not particularly interested in being pregnant again because I’ve got all these lovely summer clothes and I’m going to go and have a good time. And if I have a baby it’ll be a girl and Jim doesn’t want a girl because we lost the first boy and I’m stuck with this old drunk and I’m a Stuart and Stuarts are always ladies, and if you’re a lady you can’t divorce anybody.

LRH:

Continue. Is she crying?

PC:

No. (PC hasn’t been sobbing for some time)

LRH:

Where was she crying?

PC:

She was crying in the living room but she isn’t crying now.

LRH:

All right. Come up to present time.

PC:

(short pause; then laughs; LRH joins in briefly)

LRH:

How do you feel?

PC:

Fine!

LRH:

Better?

PC:

Yes! (very happy tone of voice) I was so scared, I was so scared. And I’m not scared now.

LRH:

Okay. (PC laughs) All right. (chuckles)