A member of the sheriff's marine unit, it says here, came jogging along the beach posing as an average, everyday gawker then pulled a badge. That undercover technique will have to do for now, until the rubber naked-person suits arrive.
At first the deputies approached the beach from the open sea in their official boats in hopes of catching skinny-baskers unaware. I wonder how long it took them to figure out why that wasn't working. (You'd think they would have learned something from the Normandy invasion. By the time the Allied forces came ashore, the Germans all had their clothes on.)
Meanwhile, down at the Addis-Holtz Behavioral Research Institute and Sub Shop, laboratory rats are being used extensively in the study of nudity, with the aim of helping humans afflicted with the dread condition. One group of rats was dressed in tiny little polyester suits, complete with shirts, ties, hats, two-tone wingtip shoes, socks and colorfully patterned boxer undershorts. Another group of rats was left unclothed.
It was found that the rats without clothes mated more readily than those trussed up to the incisors in off-the-rack ratwear. Conclusion: Nudity causes lust in rats.
The findings have been challenged in some scientific circles on the grounds that researchers failed to take into account the possible effects of (1) embarrassment on the part of rats whose undershorts had trombones printed on them, (2) fear of criticism from Mr. Blackwell and (3) chafing.